i hate them all except turtle face   
03:19am 27/10/2003
mood: lethargic
music: spaceghost coast to coast
Ben makes me feel so uncomfortable. We just broke up after 2 years because he can't keep his dick in his pants. I'm trying to be civil though. I would like for us to be friends.. one day. He keeps asking me if we are going to get back together and saying he loves me. I don't want to be mean about it, but I don't know how to react or what to tell him. I've never really been the one "dumped." I know he is hurting, but I can't relate because I haven't been through it. I've been dumped.. but that was when I was in 9th grade. It's a little different with a real relationship. He is hurting, but it will never be the same as when he hurt me. Two years we were together. Before our year anniversary he cheated on me. A little after our 2 year anniversary he cheated on me. Seems like his weird fucked up anual gift. No thank you. Take it back.

I am tired. I was up drinking late last night. And I've had a few shots tonight. They have worn off though. I have work at 2 tomorrow. So the sooner I go to sleep.. the sooner I have to be at work. That's how I look at it. I want to try and wake up early tomorrow so I can get a shower in. It won't happen. I should get a load of laundry done. That won't happen either. I'm too lazy. And it is pathetic. Blah.

Ok. I think I am done with this for now. Too sleepy to write and there is nothing to really write about. I'm going to look at things online that I will never have enough money to get. Hopefully, I'll find some cool little thing that I don't really need that is cheap and I'll get it. I like getting things in the mail. It makes me feel important. It's sad, really.

the end.
mmm.. cancer stick   
10:43pm 24/10/2003
mood: bored
music: stray cats - black cadillac
I was unsucessfully searching google for livejournal codes (custumization codes) and found a link for Blurty. Thought I would try it out. It seems to be exactly like livejournal. I hope there are more freedoms on this than the other one. That is it for now. I'm sure I will rant about something of higher importance later.