1:16AM - *..just cos i have to bring everyone down..*
while everyone is making their happy ass posts, i feel like being a cynical bitch and posting quotes that prove to assholes like them that life isnt perfect and that it all just sucks no matter what. so here i go, starting with my fave, the description of my life:
you think ur life sucks?? why dont you try being
the one who has to wonder why all the people
that she loves, just dont love her back
i was the one who said things changed
you were always the one to prove it..*
"i messed up, but that's what i do... its in my blood. my life is so fucked up, and as soon as i get something that can even classify as normal, i mess it up. i never meant to hurt you, you are the only good thing i have, but i had to mess it up... because if my life wasn't a mess... well it wouldn't be mine." ((if anyone knows what this is from, please comment//reply and let me know.. itd be greatly appreciated.))
and though i love u so, through all time and space
my love always seems to take second place <\3
I hear sound echo in the emptiness
All around, but you can't change this loneliness
These words, fall from your mouth,
and stab me in the back
It should have never come to this
Its too late, for your apologies
They can't bring back all that you've taken from me
Stripped of my pride, and left for dead
I'm so tired of apologizing to myself for you
And what you've done to me
And I've tried, to forgive myself for caring about you
There's nothing I can do...
the choice is up to you
to find out what to do
to let it go or keep kicking me to the side
i'm getting tired of your shit
and i can't deal with it
i gave up giving in, and now it's time to say goodbye
we trust and believe so easily in words they speak
we seek security in one another but there's no way to cover this
and these tragic nights and afternoons wreak disaster
and i can still feel you as if you were in the room
where does our story end where does it start
i buried you along with my heart
Every now and then
When I'm all alone
I be wishing you would call me on the telephone
Say you want me back
But you never do
I feel like such a fool
There's nothing I can do..
I'm such a fool
For you
Sometimes I hope we're still friends when I get married. I hope that I'll invite you to the wedding and you'll come. Then you'll see me as the happiest girl in the world. You'll see me with a guy that treats me right and loves me more than himself. You'll see all that you could've had and you'll regret letting me go. But the thing that I want you to see the most is that I survived without you.
I guess I just have to learn to accept that
you aren't the person I once knew and we
are not the * best friends * we once were
T.r.u.t.h _ H.u.r.t.s
L.i.e.s _ K.i.l.l
[[..no1 realizes the importance of a minute..]]
[[..until they only have one left..]]
i never got the chance to screw anything up,
you did that enough for the both of us_
d o n t t r u s t a.n.y.o.n.e., rely on y.o.u.r.s.e.l.f.,
live life for yourself cos you came into this world a l o n e
and you're leaving .b.y. .y.o.u.r.s.e.l.f.
..I'll keep this as
A constant reminder
Of the nights I spent holding onto her/him
And rest assured I'm moving on
I miss you less, with each day your gone
..I set myself up for the greatest fall of all time..
My eyes burn from these tears
You think you'd learn over these years
Good things won't last forever
Sometimes I feel I could drop off the face of the earth
It seems I do more harm than good
And I don't know if it's worth me loosing sleep over this
So take take everything and leave me scrambling
Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place
oh wow.. look.. here comes a full song:
Let's start out by starting over.
What did I expect?
You're no good at lying and I'm no good at comebacks.
You're so untouchable.
I'm oh-so-terrible at this.
I'm terrible at this, you know.
Don't hold this against me.
I've already said I'm sorry.
And I bet you've got every word I said
memorized in your head.
And you'll use every one of them,
and you'll use every one of them against me.
Don't hold this against me.
I've already said I'm sorry.
Tell all your friends about me.
Don't hold this against me.
I've already said I'm sorry.
I hope you choke on every word you spoke when you were screaming at me.
And realize how many times I've tried, but that's wishful thinking.
All I want is an apology for what you did and how you treated me.
Get me far away, or at least as far as this car will take me.
Tell all your friends about me.
Don't hold this against me.
I've already said I'm sorry.
Don't hold this against me.
I've already said I'm sorry. [[MBR//Lovers and Liars]]
why does hello feel like goodbye?
these memories can't replace,
these wishes i wished and these dreams i chased
take this broken heart and make it right
It's so simple and complicated.
The way you can crush me.
cross out these days
on the calendar
it hurts me so much
and im not quite sure
i care anymore
i don't want to speak these words.
cause i don't want to make things any worse.
Third times a charm, but would we even get that far?
Though I owed it to everyone, but I really owe it to myself.
I just thought I'd let you know
I filled my head with your voice.
And now I'm drowning,
Well I wrote this song for you.I'll spend a million nights
Just like tonight you know,
I screamed your name at the sky,
Until I lost my voice.
Well I'd give my life for you.
i feel another full song coming up..:
love is just another word for pain
it's a broken record repeating the same thing
when you want it it's not there
when you have it you don't care
when i lose it in the end...
the heartbreak, the heartache is more than i wanted
we gave up, we made up
it's not like you cared
deception, depression is all that i've got
am i losing what's there
and i've made up my mind
i'd be better off alone
love is just a waste of time
and all the lonely nights
and all the crushing scenes
and all the pointless fights
someone tell me what it means
someone tell me why hearts break
'cuz sometimes i think this thing called love is another word for pain
and i'm giving up on happy endings
the one's that are only in movies
where the guy gets the girl and everybody's happy
i think that's the way it should be
the heartbreak, the heartache is more than i wanted
we gave up, we made up
it's not like you cared
deception, depression is all that i've got
am i losing what's there
and i've made up my mind
i'd be better off alone
love is just a waste of time
and all the lonely nights
and all the crushing scenes
and all the pointless fights
someone tell me what it means
someone tell me why hearts break
'cuz sometimes i think this thing called love is another word for pain
is another word for pain
alright.. im done for now. all i have to say in conclusion is that i really am "alone in the universe." im pathetic. nothings real. nothings true. i dont even know anymore. and dont think for one minute i regret what happened a week or so ago. i dont. cos now im happier.. cos im not being ignored. but still, other things still suck. life in general just does. people being taken out of it, shitty people being brought in. its just all getting so fucked up. i dont know what to do anymore.. sometimes i really think i should do something again.. but if i do i think about 4 people would hurt me even more for it. so whatever. i give up. ill never get what i want. ill never be happy. and ill never NOT be alone. so fuck it. let the rest of the world have their fun. ill learn how to have fun on my own. i guess.. =-\ sometimes i wish i could just break down and cry.. but then i'd be weak right? god forbid i have feelings.. oh and by the way, the meaning of a lot of this stuff isnt as obvious or as apparent as it may seem, so dont bother making assumptions, you might as well just ask instead. its less risky that way. now go away. leave me like everyone else has. goodnight.
numb