lex's Blurty

i hate you!! i hate you i hate you i hate you!
how can you fucking do this?

so you fuck me. then you tell me that you've been talking to a new girl.
what the fuck is wrong with you?!
and all i get is an "um sorry?"
what the hell is that you shitbag.

the cycle ends now. i'm done.
i want to be done. i deserve better.
you treat me like shit, it's terrible. i can't believe you don't even realize how remotely good you have it.
that saying "you don't know what you got until it's gone"
you're gonna shit yourself when you realize what you fucking lost.

to you i'm just your safety girl. you like me. but you won't even attempt to go anywhere with our relationship or give it a chance. i hate it.
your excuse is always the same
"oh i don't have time for a girlfriend i got too much shit on my plate"
i'm not some needy psycho bitch that needs you 24/7
so you have time for all of those other girls that come after me. but not one second for the one girl that treats you right? and sees what nobody else does.

you're terrible.

what i wanna know is why you keep coming back.
obviously i'm not good enough for you if you keep leaving me like this.
but even though i'm not good enough for you..are none of those other girls better than me?
because if they were you would still be with her. and not me.
and you wouldn't keep crawling back to me every other couple of months.
you make no sense. i hate you.

you used to hurt me. you used to make me cry for weeks at a time.
but the sad thing is. i expect it from you now.
so it doesn't hurt.
i haven't shed one tear over you since thanksgiving. and it's gonna stay like that.
you don't deserve any of my tears.

all of my friends tell me i need to treat myself better and respect myself.
and realize that i deserve better.
i know i deserve better. i just always wanted you.

i'm done with being hurt by you. it's so unfair.
i can't take it.

i knew you didn't change.
i never expected anything different.
i didn't even hope. that's how low you've gotten.
and i know i should never expect that from a guy.. but you're that pathetic.

i hate you.
i don't know why i love you.
why don't you love me?
i give you all of me.
i gave you my virginity.
you gave me yours.
you regret it.
that kills me.
you have no idea.

i give you all of the attention you want and don't deserve
yet i give it to you anyways.
i gave you my heart.
i let you in.
and you take it ALL for granted.

when you realize that all of the other girls that you fuck around with after me and say you like. and sweet talk them just like you did to me.
and they don't treat you half as good as i do.

maybe, just maybe... you'll realize how good you had it.

but i doubt it.
...it kills me.