Another Survey   
05:56pm 19/09/2003
 
mood: angry
music: Linkin Park 'Reanimation,'
last cigarette: Never. So screw you.
last kiss: Never. Call me when I'm like 18.
last good cry: I must admit. Yesterday. Because of everything that's going on. I just don't want everything to fall apart.
last library book checked out: dunno.
last movie seen: Matchstick Men.
last book read: I am readING Sabriel.
last cuss word uttered: Fuck.
last beverage drank: Milk.
last food consumed: Papa Gino's cheese thick crust pizza stuff.
last phone call: Yesterday. Sharon. Not Brittany, who hasn't called me in forever.
last tv show watched: Anime Unleashes, Silent Mobius.
last shoes worn: My gray sneakers? actually by blue flip-flops.
last cd played: Reanimation. Linkin Park.
last item bought: Mentos. <3
last downloaded: None.
last annoyance: 8th grade 'relationships' and people planning to ditch me. And people not calling. And people not talking when I ask questions.
last disappointment: People planning to ditch me. Thinking I was finally right, only to find out I'm so wrong.
last soda drank: dunno. Mom doesn't allow soda in the house. I drink it too often.
last thing handwritten: stabbing stuff with pencil cause I was mad.
last word spoken: 'Bye.'
last sleep: last night.
last im: Nik.
last weird encounter: Today when Brittany kept asking if I was ok. OBVIOUSLY NOT.
last ice cream eaten: ice cream sandwich.
last amused: I can't remember.
last time wanting to die: yesterday. feeling bad for myself. Too much crap going on.
last time in love: love sucks. love is fake. Why would you want it?
last time hugged: Mom and Dad leaving.
last time scolded: Probably not long ago.
last chair sat in: the one i am sitting in now...
last lipstick used: never. call me when I'm 18.
last shirt worn: black shirt.
last time dancing: At Kim's house doing my 'Happy' dance. Yea, you wish you saw, don't you?
last poster looked at: Blues Clues Safety Neighborhood. Long story. Don't ask.
last show attended: awwww I wish Evanescence. But no.
last webpage visited: Blurty. Yep. And Fanfiction.net

1 MINUTE AGO: i started this.
1 HOUR AGO: i was in the living room.
1 DAY AGO: feeling bad for myself and Henry.
1 WEEK AGO: at the movies i think.
1 YEAR AGO: i was actually happy.

current clothes: black pants and black shirt.
current mood: no mood, just drowning in my miseries.
current music: Linkin Park.
current taste: none.
current hair: actually flat for once.
current annoyance: 8th grade 'relationships' and people planning to ditch me. And people not calling. And people not talking when I ask questions.
current smell: the dog.
current thing I should be doing: Writing chapter 4 for My Immortal.
current desktop picture: I dunno Drew put it up.
current refreshment: none.
current worry: This amount of stress can't be healthy. And if I'm losing my best friend.

1. What do you most like about your body? I <3 my eyes.
2. And least? No arm stregnth.
3. How many fillings do you have?: none.
4. Do you think you're good looking?: No. I have no self-esteem.
5. Do other people tell you that you're good looking? Why would they? And No.
6. Do you look like any celebrities? no.
 
   

(But who cares anyway?)

 
Shaman King Theme Song Lyrics   
06:17pm 19/09/2003
  Look around you, look beyond.
We can make an unbreakable bond.
The world around you is not what it seems
Know the feel beyond your wildest dreams
So many things I never could see
So many choices fallin' on me
Could it be my destiny to be Shaman King?
Shaman King, to be Shaman King
If your spirit is strong,
you could be the one.
I could look at the world in a different light
I know what it takes to make it right.
I won't give up the fight
To be Shaman King.
 
   

(But who cares anyway?)

 
Sickness   
06:18pm 19/09/2003
  Have you ever gotten so mad that,
everything was all a blur?
When you look back and you can't tell,
exactly who you were?
Do you get that nervous feeling,
when all is done and gone?
So down deep inside of you,
you know something is wrong.

I just can't put my finger on it,
it just won't seem to stop.
These feelings, they are drowning me out,
hardening my heart.

I won't let it get to me.
I know something is wrong with me.
The pain is just a game to me.
And I won't let it win.

When you know you're not to be trusted,
But deep down that's really all you wanted.
You watch your life fall down before you.
Even your brain starts to ignore you.
There's a sickness and it starts,
Way down deep inside your heart.
You can feel it burning, tearing.
It's going to break you, the end nearing.

I won't let it get to me.
I know something is wrong with me.
The pain is just a game to me.
And I won't let it win.
 
   

(But who cares anyway?)