| 3:15p |
Future ambitions
Hello, dear friends! It is Thursday afternoon. I am at home. The sun is shining. I have a cold, and it is the second day that I have stayed home. Dear me! I do feel a touch guilty, which I think is irrational, seeing as I am actually sick (my throat feels like sandpaper). I just couldn't face sitting on public transport for 3 hours today, and I didn't think I could be civil if I went to work.
Well. As you might recall, my last post was rather melancholy and truthful. I kind of regretted what I wrote after I wrote it, because I worried that my friends would think that I was attacking them (which I wasn't). In the end, I am glad that I was honest, because it meant that people were honest with me in return and that I learnt a lot. I learnt that I do have friends, and that there are also people that I really do care about, and who I really do have great affection for. Perhaps what I really should have written last week was a greater truth: that it is hard adjusting to life, post-educational institution. I feel a bit silly writing that, seeing as I have been out of university for over 2 years now (I think!). Anyway, life just isn't that easy, friendship-wise, anymore. I can't walk out of a room and see my friends sitting in the sun at a cafe, or sitting outside on the grass. Sometimes, I really start to worry and panic that I'm not going out enough, and that I don't really talk to that many friends any more. But then I realise that everyone really is quite busy with their lives. I don't know, it's just hard growing up. I constantly feel lost and confused. I feel as though I should be making big steps and big decisions, but it is all scary and daunting. Got any advice? My friend Mel, who is about to get married, told me that all I could truly do was pray hard and read God's word. And I think she is right. So anyway, if you are out there and you are my friend, thanks for being there for me at various parts of my life. I really do appreciate you.
Anyway, I don't know if I have been making big steps lately, but I have been taking steps, you know? Things are really crazy at my work at the moment. Three people have resigned in less than a month, our clients are in uproar about many different things...everything seems to be going wrong. They say that you shouldn't abandon a sinking ship, but I feel like I've already got my bikini and goggles on. Last time I had a sick day (which was about 3 weeks ago), I started to apply for some jobs. One of the places- an uber trendy Sydney bookstore- called me back, and I had an interview on Monday night. I was so nervous! The interview went really well, but I left feeling disappointed, as it was only a casual position and not a full-time one. Oh well. The manager was really nice, though, and at least one day I will be able to tell my kids that I nearly worked at that bookstore...it's like the Empire Records of books to me! So anyway, I applied for more jobs yesterday, and I felt really good about it. Not all of them are design-related, but at least they sound like fun. At the moment, I am just concerned with getting outta my current job.
In other news, I have a new admirer. I don't remember his name, so I call him Sid. Logical, huh? Anyway, the other day I was walking to work from the train station, and this dude comes up to me and says, "Are you from China? Japan? Korea?" Um, hello, totally NOT my favourite questions in the world. So I replied, "I'm from Australia," and the guy said, "Oh, I thought you were from China." Then next he said, "You are very beautiful. I have watched you many times." Aaaaaaaaaaargh! The rest of my walk to work was spent evading his curious questions (e.g. "Where do you live? Where do you work?"), and walking straight past my office so that he didn't know where I worked. Finally, that golden opportunity came when I could tell him I was taken: he mentioned a place in Sydney where he used to live, and I said, "Yes, it's a beautiful area- MY BOYFRIEND lives there." At this point, I excused myself and went into a petrol station, and decided that it was absolutely important for me to buy a packet of snakes. Anyway, I saw Sid again on Tuesday, and I don't think he's gotten the picture. I even talked about MY BOYFRIEND heaps again, only to have Sid reply, "So what time do you start work?" I then said that I HAD to walk down a certain street, just so that I could scurry away from him. Unfortunately, I worked no where near that street, so I had to walk around the block and was late to work. Sigh. There are so many strange guys near where I work! Either that, or I am emitting some monster pheremones or something!
Dear friends, you know that it is love when you go out with a boy who loves Tool and The Mars Volta, and yet surprises you with a present of the new Hilary Duff CD and "New York Minute", the Mary Kate and Ashley DVD! Hurrah! Geoff is such a sweetie. In return (well, okay, after I demanded a paper-scissors-rock match and I lost), I obliged to watch "Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back" with him yesterday afternoon. That Princess Leia is one cool fighter chick. I liked her white puffa vest. Harrison Ford is also just sooooooooo cool and bossy! Anyways, it has been totally POP CULTURE FIESTA in Carla Gypsygirl Land! Ooh yeah. I LOVE the Hilary Duff CD- she is so sweet and innocent! I LOVE the Mary Kate and Ashley movie- so slapstick, so predictable, such great fashion! And it had The Donnas AND Sahara Hotnights on the soundtrack- woooo! I LOVE pop sister acts like Hilary and Haylie Duff, MK & A, The Veronicas!
Okay. More job hunting to do. Call me if there is a new part going in a chick flick.
Carla Gypsygirl xxx
ps. Sorry for the lack of the promised pictures- my brother has stolen our scanner! Argh! |