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imitations of life

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cast your stones
castaways and cutouts [18 Sep 2006|10:06pm]
[ mood | excited ]
[ music | a coutionary tale - the decemberists ]


October 25th will be the best night ever!

cast your stones
things i dont remember [24 Aug 2006|02:01pm]
[ mood | busy ]
[ music | Things i dont remember-- Ugly Cassanova ]

Hey Hey, Im twenty one! Its finally legal for me to do all the things i've been doing since i was seventeen. Awesome...
Andrew and Matt took me bar hopping in addison. I had a great time and didn't even get too sloshed. I paced myself, drank lots of water and loaded up on bready things to keep from overdoing it. Unfortunately that wasn't enough to keep me from having to visit the emergency room the next day. It wasn't even the alchohol that got me, it was the sugar in the weak, fruity drinks that made me so sick. Apparently, sugar is really bad for diabetics. Go figure.

After vomiting for nine hours straight, a short hospital stay and being threatened with supositories if i decide to get sick again, everythign else seems pretty peachy. My boss has given me the opportunity to give Coffee Seminars once a week for the next couple of months, which is exciting. Our district manager has also given my boss the go-ahead to let this lowly little bar jockey begin the coffee master program. Score! Even though it's alot of work, i'm really getting into it.
Watch out for those dressed up aligators!

1 stone casts cast cast your stones
[16 Jun 2006|07:43pm]
[ mood | confused ]

I find myself looking in the mirror more and more these days. I'm getting older, fatter, and increasingly more judgemental. Who am i? Where did i go? Where am i going. God, i hate how cliche i sound, but theres nothing for it. I had lunch with my father, stepmother, boyfriend, and younger sister last week. It never ceases to amaze me that despite living with all of them for the past 20 years, i still manage to feel like an outcast among them. Its not that they treat me any differently, it's more a matter of relation. Its as if your blood was meant to carry the life force of your entire family as a living breathing entity, as well as thier DNA. I am inequipt to live here. We sat together for over two hours and i had nothing of intrest to say. Luckily in these situations i can just falll back into surface subjects; My job, my boyfriend, my dog; other people's bullshit drama; it really doesnt matter, by this point no one is listening anyway. Its all a charade, carefully rehearsed. You guys be the good parents and i'll be the good daughter, right? And then we move on. I start to wonder if i'll ever feel comfortable anywhere. Maybe i'm over thinking things. I need to relax. Stop smoking, lay off the diet pills and the coffee. And i could probably stand to smile more. In the grand scheme of things, this is just a slight slump and in a week or two i'll be feeling back to normal.
Or something. I dont know.
I guess i'm just in a funk today.

pictures of AKON coming soon........

1 stone casts cast cast your stones
[12 Jan 2006|02:09pm]
everyone loves the mugs

I don't know if it's the chain smoking, the incessant wind providing my sinuses with a constant stream of allergens, or maybe just the weather, but my nose hasn't stopped running for a week. Personally, i'm leaning towards allergies since the arise of my nose's faucet immitation coincided directly with my running out of Zyrtec. Looks like it's time for a visit to Dr. Feel-good, and thats good news if you like coming home with a big sack of prescriptions. (and who doesnt?)
Other than the unfortunate snotty state of my nasal passages, everything else is pretty damn peachy, which is wierd to say because i've usually got alot more to bitch about. Money is tight, but not so tight that we can't afford a few of the nicer things we want. Work is hard, but enjoyable, so it's not terrible to go every day. Andrew is a guy and acts accordingly, but he is a good guy and always scratches my head and pays his share of rent. All in all, i'd say we're doing rather well for a couple of kids making a little more than minimun wage.
Yesterday, Andrew took me to the DMA, then we ate lunch at the Trinity Hall Pub, and we capped the night off with a movie (memoirs of a geisha. It had a decent story and the cinamatography was nice, but i wish it had focused more on the actual lives, training and traditions of Geishas.) and a couple of glasses of good wine before tunrning in. The only thing we had to pay for was our entry to the Museum (10$) and the bottle of wine (12$). Everything else was covered by various gift certificates. Score! even poor kids can live it up every once in awhile.
Lately i've developed a bad habit about buying mugs. When you work in a coffee store, and you have to stare at the mugs all day for months at a time, i'm sorry, you just have to take a few of them home. Or Most of them. (but not that silly pink one.) Andrew, i belive, lives in mortal fear of coming home one day to find all of our prised possesions sold and replaced by an apartment full of coffee mugs. Its not very probable, though. Starbucks only retails 8-10 mugs at a time. My stuff-to-mugs transition will infact be much more gradual. He probaly won't even notice untill the computer turns up missing.

3 stone casts cast cast your stones
a song to pass the time.... [15 Nov 2005|10:41pm]
[ mood | loved ]
[ music | Shut up and drive - cover by Radiohead (originally Deftones) ]

What i've been reading:

1) Death of an Ordinary Man - Glen Duncan awesome

2) Ten Little Indians - Sherman Alexie awesome

3) Barrel Fever - David Sedaris awesome

4) The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath awesome

5) Bitch Magazine the feminist response to pop culture

What I've been listening to:

1) pavement awesome

2) Thirteen Senses awesome

3) The Black Heart Procession awesome

4) The Sea and Cake awesome

there. I'm more obscure than you.

cast your stones
[12 Nov 2005|02:02pm]
[ mood | relaxed ]

Holly is in her room getting ready for whatever debauchery today will hold. I'm at the computer killing time.

You are Yuna!
You scored 25 good or evil, 20 spirituality, -5 power, and 13 intelligence!
Undeniably innocent and intelligent with the slightest - almost invisible - hint of corruption, Yuna, the daughter of High Summoner Braska draws on strong beliefs, her quiet wisdom and the wealth of friendships around her to strike out and defend Spira from Sin. Physical strength is perhaps her only real disability, but she makes up for it with a strong connection to the metaphysical through her deep faith. Throughout FFX, Yuna is faced with a constant stream of tragedy, but she never loses hope - always moving forward with her faith in her heart. Even when that faith proved false, she kept on and fought to find something else to believe in, determined not to give in to Sin's whims. Finally finding a way to defeat Sin's cycle of torment, Yuna again faced tragedy as she faced the loss of her love. Ever determined and hopeful, she kept going on until finally recapturing what she was denied for her sacrifices. Aligned with good, faithful and intelligent, if a bit weak, you are probably a very determined person with a strong belief in something - whether it be God or Starbucks Coffee is up to you. Chances are if you have that much determination coupled with keen knowledge, you'll get far in the world. Just try not to dwell too much on what you might be lacking strength-wise, and you should do well. Similar Characters include Rinoa(ff8), Relm(ff6), Ramza(fft)

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

free online dating free online dating
You scored higher than 93% on purity

free online dating free online dating
You scored higher than 86% on faith

free online dating free online dating
You scored higher than 6% on strength

free online dating free online dating
You scored higher than 43% on intelligence
Link: The Who are you in the FF Universe Test written by Helbereth on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

I did this one for andrew, because i thought he's find it funny. Unfortunately the test agrees with what he's been saying for years. And that thing about Starbucks? WTF. Are you spying on me test? You bastard!

2 stone casts cast cast your stones
viva la diversions [04 Nov 2005|02:49pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]
[ music | the distant sound of barking dogs ]

After several weeks of anticipation, Andrew and i have finally brought home the newest addition to our little suburban apartment family. We would like to welcome:

our new baby

Isn't she cute?

Equiped with every version of Nintendogs they make, i'm sure we won't be speaking to each other for a very long time. In a week or so, we shall be adding such titles as Bust-a-Move DS, ElecTroPlAnkTon, and TRAUMA CENTER: under the knife, to our collection, which will probably severely cut into our social life, but we'll be too busy playing video games to notice.

Work has been going well. As of now i am the only one of five new hires to have recieved any Green Apron Cards, let alone an astronomical two. Yes, i am pretty great. I'm really looking forward to the holiday season. This may be due to the fact that i am overly optimistic, but i don't really care. I can foolistly look forward to things. Who's going to stop me?

1 stone casts cast cast your stones
I should be doing laundry right now. [20 Oct 2005|03:11pm]
[ mood | accomplished ]
[ music | feel the pain - Dinosaur Jr. ]

this picture is not laundry

1 stone casts cast cast your stones
[15 Oct 2005|01:13am]
[ mood | hopeful ]
[ music | 16 military wives - The Decemberists ]

Praise all the Gods man made, Andrew has found himself a job. Clever little sprite, he gets paid a fair amount to be a trmendous nerd, a.k.a. Senior Game Adviser at Game Stop. He only had the job for two days before they promoted him; i am awash in pride. Now with our combined incomes we can afford luxurious things like food that doesn't come straight from a can and bedsheets without gaping holes. We're on our way up.
I, ofcourse, am still punching the over-weaning corporate clock at your friendly local Starbucks. There was awhile there where i really hated the job and refused to believe i'd ever make it in the cut-throat world of coffee making. Now, after almost four months, i've settled in and found my place among the other ingenuinely overly enthusiastic Baristas. It's such a strange new feeling for me to work in a place where i not only lack hatred for my customers and co-workers, but have actually gone beyond that to like them and even enjoy their company. We trade storied and tell inside jokes and have even made up Star Wars/ coffee related nick-names for eachother. (i.e. Luke Chaiwalker, and Queen Affogato)
I've found that you can actually learn alot about people and the ways of the world in general from behind your P.O.S. (thats Point Of Sales, or Register to you lousy jobless lay-abouts) Iv'e learned that there is atleast one nice person to every asshole. That most people actually don't want to break your soul in half, even if you mess up their latte. And though the vast majority of people are mindless, idiotic, drones, there are enough kind, intelligent, and interesting people in the universe to make it worth a damn. Infact, that is what most people really desperately want, someone to think that they are worth a damn. It's given me a tiny drop of hope for the future.
Ofcourse, i could go on for hours about all the waify, vapid, over privledged fashionistas, or the shaggy-haired trendy, mother fuckers, with all their regurgitated ideals and opinions, and theres always the bug-eyed stalker guy who comes in to stair at all the girlswhile we're working. Though it's fun to imagine placing all these people on an island and blowing it to vapors, it's much better to focus on the positive.

Lately i've found myself disenchanted with music scenes in general. Its really been ages since i found something new that i actually liked. I think the last band i actually looked into with any sort of interest was the Decemberists. Everything i hear just sounds so dismally similar to everything else. We stopped by the Virgin Megastore while we were out today and i this "great, innovative, new band" came on the loud speaker. It was an alright song so i went to find more music by the band, which was called "Star". I walked over to the listening booth full of hope for what this "great, new, innovative" band could be and to my extreme dissapointment, every song on that album sounded the same, more than that it sounded like every pretentious piano-rock psuedo-indie band that ever was. Its not that i dont like that sound. I'm just tired of it. I want to listen to something intricate, innovative and poetic. not the same self-proclaimed enlightenement over and over. Oh, where have all the Frank Blacks and the Ben Giobbards gone? S I G H .
So thats my re-cap of the last few weeks. I'm almost afraid to say this, because i know how fragile things are, but things are really looking up right now. Rent and all my bills are covered. My car is woking, work isn't crap, i'm dating a wonderful guy who loves me, helps me keep the apartment clean, and pays his half of rent. Hot Damn, it's like a dream. Now you can all stop calling me (especially on my days off while i'm still sleeping) to find out what i'm doing. see that stuff up there. Thats it.

4 stone casts cast cast your stones
[08 Sep 2005|10:27pm]
[ mood | working ]

Its funny how domestic i've become since i got my own place. I used to spend all my extra money on a multitude of useless items like braceletts and buttons. Now, anytime i have a few dollars to spare i'm out searching relentlessly for that one perchase that will make my apartment complete. Visions of dinnettes, shelves, and futon covers haunt my dreams. Now my days off are filled with grocery shopping and laundry. I tidy all the time. It amuses me to think about it.

Work is going better. Even though i still must suffer under the weight of certain idiots, i'm begining to really gain my bearings at the bar. Now if only i could get some rush practice, i would be set. Unfourtunatly there are some people who expect me to learn rush rythm through osmosis, which poses a bit of a problem since i am made of more than one cell. My hope is that i'll be paired with an intelligent person for most of next week and they will recognize that i need the experience.
Working the 5am shift has some definite perks. The greatest of which is being able to have two days off in a row. Don't bother calling. I'm not doing ANYTHING this weekend. i am going to sit on my fancy ass and do nothing. I plan to sleep past noon and, if possible, to eat cookies.

In other news, we went thrifting today. I got some pants from The gap for something like four dollars. Goooo being cheap! I also got andrew this adorable little emo sweater. It makes him look like he ought to be teaching european literature at some distant college somewhere.

1 stone casts cast cast your stones
[30 Aug 2005|09:28pm]
[ mood | cranky ]
[ music | reel big fish - take on me ]

No job is without it's one token asshole co-worker. For some reason my boss has decided to schedule me with him every god forsaken day. This has made the 5am shift alot worse than i originally thought it would be. It's really hard to do your job well when the person training you expects you to be psychic, but i have soldiered on, thanks to the suppourt of people at Starbucks who don't suck. In just one more month benefits will kick in and i'll be sitting pretty. And i'll be able to afford things like medicine and bandaids. Won't that be cool?
Other than that, nothing is really going on. Rent is due in a few days and i'll have just enough to cover it and my bills. It gives me a lovely warm feeling.
Just in case there is any confusion, i'm not a snack.

cast your stones
[21 Aug 2005|09:32pm]
[ mood | pleased ]
[ music | The decemberists - 16 military wives ]

Thanks to everyone who remembered my birthday. It wasn't at all horrible. Nothing exploded or fell on my head, crushing my skull and various other vital organs. Dad got me a futon. It's very pretty and it seats more than one person at a time. Andrew took me out, cooked me dinner and made me a card. It's also very pretty but you can't sit on it. Work is going well enough. I'm hoping to get more bar time this week. Yeah, nothing too terribly interesting. I've started working on a short story. I'll have to post it when it's finished. Lots of new art. Lots of new photos. Things are going rather swimmingly.

that is all.

3 stone casts cast cast your stones
[12 Aug 2005|11:44pm]
[ mood | nostalgic ]
[ music | thirteen senses - into the fire ]

three days untill the big 2-0. I thought i would have lapsed into a state of utter despair and dread by now, but with everything thats been going on lately i haven't had the chance. Sad to say that the only real reason i even know it's coming up is because working requires that i know what day it is. Still, i can't complain. There are plenty of people around who make having a birthday a worthwhile experience. Otherwise i think i'd just as soon ignore it.
Since i was about ten years old, not a single birthday has passed without atleast some mention to the fact that i'm supposed to be a "grown-up" now, and that "childish" things like distant goals inconsistent with that of my immediate elders should be put away. I can only imagine the various nuggets of wisdom poised at the tips of my parent's touges, awaiting the final hour of my adolescence for dispersal. I can tell you that i'm not looking foreward to it. It's not that i don't believe that the young should try to benefit from the wisdom of the aged. I simply know that, no matter what actions i have taken, or what actions i may take in the future, it will not be enough to satisfy my parents' wishes. Though i'm aware that, deep down, they only want for my success, it is painfully obvious that in their minds "success" is synonymous with "doing everything their way and doing nothing on my own". I am a daughter, not a monument. My life is not a homage to their child-rearing prowess. I may not always go about things in the most efficient way, but in the end, i always reach my destination. Who says the most efficient way is always the best anyway? Some of the best times in my life have consisted of detours along the perverbal (and oh-so cliche) road of life. How much would i have missed had i not taken the long way?
I just wish that they could understand i am not exactly like them, and that somehow they would find a way to be alright with that. Erm......lets not hold our breath on that one.
I suppose you could say that my thoughts of late have been pretty well fixed on this whole "growing up" issue. In the space of only two weeks i went from living comfprtably supported entirely by my parents in my mother's house to an apartment with groceries that need to be bought and bills that need to be paid, all with a job that only barely gets it done. I think these drastic changes have affected me on the inside as well. People who were once very important to me, i have begun to see in a new, less flattering, light. I often find myself wishing that things would just go back to the way they used to be, when i was always surrounded by positive, beneficial, and truely caring company. I miss my old friends now more than ever, especially since i haven't the time to go see them. I'm beginning to understand what the intricacies of true love and friendship really are. With any luck, i'll soon get settled into this new fashion of living and the days of staring out of my bedroom window feeling rather sad will be a thing of the past. Untill then, i just have to focus on the good in my life, of which there is plenty. Though my moods are as violently incostistant as the sea, my Andrew-fish has stuck unwaveringly to my side through this entire ordeal. My other friends, though out of communication, are in my thoughts, and that gives me strength too, when things get bad. Though somewhat misguided, i know that my family loves me and will be there when i need them. When i try to look at things that way, living seems much less dounting a task, and thats a good thing for everybody.
Alright, enough of that. In other news, Annie is now an official resident in my homely little home. I'm pleasently supprised with how she's been adjusting to the move. She's getting better at staying quiet and going outside. I love having her there. I've also been promoted from lowly trainee to official starbucks Barista so i can shine my coffee stained nails with pride.
thus ends another eventful entry.

2 stone casts cast cast your stones
[31 Jul 2005|08:17pm]
[ mood | jubilant ]
[ music | zucchero - pure love ]

Anyone who has tried to get in touch with me these past few weeks has probably noticed that i haven't really been all that available lately. Unfortunately this is not because i've been on vacation or anything. About a month ago i started working at a local Starbucks. It's a really fun job. The people there, customers and co-workers, are great, for the most part, and with employee discounts, three complimentary drinks a shift, and a pound of free coffee every week, the benefits make it well worth all the work. So far i haven't had too much trouble with calling the drinks or making them. My work pace needs some improvement but every time i get frustrated my boss always reminds me that it takes ninety days to learn the job and to stop being too hard on myself. Thats the kind of support that makes it such an awesome job.
Last Friday marked the end of the great exodus from my parents house. I am now the proud owner of my very own apartment. Its a "cozy" little place which is realtor talk for "barely big enough for even your meager possesions" but its clean and its mine, so i can't complain. All i need now is a dinning room table and i'll be all set. Eventually i'm going to have a little house warming party; i'll keep everyone posted.
Other than that, theres not really anything else going on. Just your avaerage youthfull debachery. Theres not a whole lot of time for partying inbetween shifts, but i make sure to get in a good night every now and then. Andrew and i are still together. I hate to sound like one of those simmpering idiots who are obsessed with their lame-ass boyfriends, but i have to brag on him just a little. He helped my dad carry everything i own up stairs to my third floor apartment so that i wouldnt have to when i got off from work. On nights when he stays over he always makes dinner and helps me clean. He definetly wins the "bestest boyfriend ever" award.
So thus ends my little update. I can still be reached by my e-mail address and cell phone number so anyone who needs to can get intouch with me. I'm going to try to be better about answering my e-mails and messages.

cast your stones
[07 Jul 2005|03:06pm]
[ mood | mellow ]
[ music | whatever elite music andrew is subjecting me to ]

Arrg. Just a quick update to let everyone know whats going on. (not that all that many people come here anyway, it just feels productive.) For those who don't know, about two weeks ago i was thrust from the not-so warm and cozy comfort of my mother's house over an arguement over an old useless stereo. I am now in the process of finding a job and getting myself a nice litte apartment somewhere close by. Untill then i'll be floating around with my home base at my grandmother's house. I still have my cell phone so those of you who have that number can still feel free to call me, though there is no promise i'll answer. I've been really bad about that lately. Other than that, nothing else is really going on. Andrew and i are still togerther. He's really elite because he has bright eyes vinyls. :P Michelle has been kind enough to let me camp out on her couch a few days out of the week, which is always appreciated. Thats about it. so.......yeah.

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