jade's Blurty

follow your instincts
So yesterday was pretty boring. Class sucked as class usually does. I was pleasantly surprised to find that I got a B+ on my finance midterm, which was nothing short of a miracle. That means an A on my marketing midterm, a B on that last presentation, and a B+ on my finance thing. So far, so good. I totally cracked the whip on my group, and I made us meet, and I outlined the project and assigned tasks. Granted I did the leg work myself, but it'll be worth it when I get an A for this project.

I'm tired and totally PMS-ing in a major way. GRRR.

So I got home, and D told me that my mom had called and kind of bitched at him. She wanted me to call her.

Unfortunately, the wedding didn't fix everything, because our relationship was weird without all that.

So three weeks ago we went to see the violent femmes in Brooklyn, and we had plans to see our friends' bands the next day, which was Saturday. I know I posted about this. We went out to dinner on Saturday, and after we finished dinner, we found out it was a cash only restaurant. I had $63.50 in my checking account. I took $60.00 + the $2.00 ATM fee, leaving me with $1.50. Fucking fantastic. D had no cash either. Everything we had to do was cash only. Well, my mom wanted us to meet her at 1pm at this fair on Sunday in Saratoga, which is over five hours away from Brooklyn. Fairs cost money. You can't charge anything at a fair. AND it was far away. The original plan had been to go to the Catskill Game Farm, which 1. was closing forever; 2. only had entrance fees which my parents might have paid for; and 3. was two hours closer to Brooklyn, making it far easier to get there at close to 1pm. Well my mom still wanted us there at 1pm despite the difference in driving distance, and we didn't have the money to go! Bottom line: we said we couldn't go, and she STILL hasn't forgiven us for it. The next weekend D and I both had crazy midterms and projects due, so we said we didn't have time to get together. Plus, I was sick. Apparently, we haven't been forgiven for that either. I didn't call her back for about three days or so, which isn't great, I know, but it doesn't seem unforgiveable. I called her on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. On Wednesday and Thursday, she was ignoring my calls to teach me a lesson, which is neurotic and totally 8th grade. I called her on Friday, and we had a pleasant conversation for 44 minutes. She never indicated that she was angry. I asked her what her plans were. THE POINT OF THE PHONE CALL WAS TO MAKE PLANS. I had the party on Saturday, and she said she wanted to go to another fair (the woman never wants to do anything that's free- I swear. ), but that the weather was supposed to suck. She didn't invite me to do anything, and I'm not about to invite myself over, because that's rude, and she apparently had plans, and since i'm still broke, I didn't want to go to a fair. I said maybe I would call, so at best, we had plans to maybe have plans. Well, Sunday found me tired and mildly hungover with tons of housework and stuff to do, and the weather was crappy. I figured if she wanted to do something, she would have called me. She didn't. I figured everything was fine.

Well, she called and bitched at D like I said. She said that I never call her, which is ridiculous, since as I stated, I called her Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and I even called yesterday before class. Well, even though it was 10:00, and I was tired from a long ass day, I called my mom because I love that crazy woman, even though I had a sinking suspicion that it wouldn't end well. After about ten minutes of pleasant conversation, the shit storm was unleashed. She started giving me tons and tons of crap about how we didn't see each other three weeks ago, and about how after that being sick and having midterms wasn't a valid excuse, and how we had plans on Sunday and how I never call her. SHE'S CRAZY..I swear to God I don't know what to do. D heard all these conversations. I'm not making it up. I know what happened. I just..

I kept being like "I'm not going to fight with you about something that happened three weeks ago." "I didn't have the money""I was sick and had midterms- I stayed out of work for three days straight!" "Do you want to make plans this weekend or not? Just name a date, a time, and a place, and I'll be there...we didn't have plans."

Of course we're having this huge fight at 10:30 at night; I was so pissed off I couldn't sleep for hours. What am I supposed to do? The fact that I'm busy and have other stuff I HAVE TO DO makes her sad, upset, and angry, but I can't spend cash I don't have, and I can't fail my midterms to make her happy. She didn't invite me over, and she said she had plans, but she's angry at me for not making plans? I don't want her to be upset, but I don't feel like there's anything I can do to make this better short of ruining my own life.

Please tell me if I'm crazy.
Thank you to anyone who actually read through this insane rant.

Current Mood: depressed