MY DADDY!   
07:50pm 16/08/2005
 
mood: accomplished
Well these past 2 days I got to spend time with my dad and his wife and i feel i did my part and i am at peace now, i dont know if i will see him again and if i do when it will be but i give him pics of my boys, his wife actually was the one who asked for them, OMG i was shocked, and i told her i loved her but she did not respond to that but i feel i touched their hearts somehow, i got to hug my daddy and even tell him how much i missed him and love him and he told me he loved me and missed me too, i did not try to hard cause i didnt think i should do all the work i felt to let him and her meet me half way, so only time will tell, i have been praying for years for god to touch my dads hearts and his wife and bring them both back into my life, i can for give her but she needs to except me too, i love her in christ and i have forgiven them both but i hope it all works out, i have been the happiest that i have ever been in many years, even though it was the death of my papaw but i saw my daddy.
 
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MY DADDY!   
10:35pm 13/08/2005
 
mood: confused
music: "Father of mine" by everclear
Well i found out tonight i Will see him monday evening and tuesday at the funeral, but now that i wanted to see him so bad i am speechless, i dont know what to say to him, but i hope h speaks to me and doesnt run away like he always has b4, i miss him i want my relationship back but i dont know how to get it back hes missed so many years of my life and my kids, i am clueless.well i guess i will update as i feel needed to speak my mind, i will about guess to have lots this week.i love ya kitty for being a one true friend to me.
 
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VERY VERY VERY SAD   
01:32pm 13/08/2005
 
mood: rejected
Well the past few days i have been at the hospital, my grandpa was in the ICU and they had him on life support and all, but this morning he passed on at 3:47 am and also my daddy did not even come up to see him b4 he died, hes not seen me in yrs but why should he avoid his own daddy too, i am so sad, i was so disapointed, i wanted to run into my daddy for the first time in years, i wanted the hugs and kisses i always got from him and i didnt even get to see his face,he was my everything, and i want that back, i have been crying so hard and so long i cant even produce anymore tears.well i am out til later and i have more on my mind.
 
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Just plain bored!   
06:28pm 09/08/2005
 
mood: drained
well i have been so lazy today and done absolutly nothing, well i mpped thats it, but other than that slept, BEnjamin has been sick al little again and jericho too, benjamin has been running those fevers again but i am able to control them, jerichos problem is only his asthma! but they will be ok.




*loves and kisses*
 
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Hello   
05:54pm 03/08/2005
 
mood: anxious
Well today was a good day for me, i went to the doctor that was the only bad thing, i hate needles and they had to draw blood for my physical, i am going to be having my wisdom teeth taken out soon and they needed a physical first, any-how i have been busy these past few days, my brother just had his first baby boy, they named him Gabriel Alan and he is the cutest thing, well except my 2 boys,lol you know how it is! your kids are always cuter,LOL no I think all babies are cute well he was 8 lbs 7 oz 20 inces long and 14 inches around his head, same as my oldest boy benjamin only benjamin was longer he was 21 inches, well i have had such a god week this week so far, A new life always makes me feel giggly.

Kitty i am sorry i have not been around lately but you understand, i havnt forgot about you.
 
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10:24am 28/07/2005
 
mood: frustrated
Well I got into a arguement with my husband today, not to bad, but first time we argued in a long time, he was acting like i sit at home and do nothing all day and i do more then he thinks, these kids need me more and more, Friday i am going to Memphis,Tn and he is going to be home all night with then kids by himself and he is going to see what i do all week long, well i am very disturbed still from the arguement, we hardly ever argue but when we do it makes me feel like crap.
 
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10:06pm 26/07/2005
 
mood: exhausted
Well today I went to my counseling appt and of course cried as i always do, but she brings up alot that i need to get out, well they uped my meds a little to help with anxiety and i hope it helps, well kitty you know you are helping me with my problems as i help with yours, but together we will help about our daddys, i love ya girl and we have become the best of freinds.
 
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