Sharon's Blurty

This week is just creeping along for me. I have been extremely tired for the past two weeks...lack of sleep, appointments, obligations...I have spread myself thin.

I miss moments that do not have to be filled with constant chatter. Two people (friends, lovers) that are comfortable just being with each other.

Sadly, I have gotten to the point with one friend that I cannot tolerate being around her constant negativity. I have tried speaking to her about it, but her victim mentality prohibits any kind of progress. I cannot be around someone like this for very long. If one is so unhappy with certain aspects of their life, then they need to DO something about it....one cannot just wait for something to come along and change it. Being around the negativity and depression...I can't do it for long. I spent several months trapped in a Hell of my own, and I refuse to put myself in a position where I peek over the edge.

There are others who I have grown tired of trying to reach or to figure out. Relationships of any kind cannot be sustained by the efforts of just one. I can't make a friend want to share themselves with me, I can't make them understand that I would go to the ends of the earth for them....and frankly, I have just grown tired of trying to be a good friend to those who don't know how to do it themselves.

I'm just tired. I have found myself in a happy anti-social state. I spend the majority of my free time by myself and I'm okay with that. The silence is nice. We will see how long this lasts.