Rollercoaster Ride
God is shaking my once perfect world. It's funny how I used to complain about how boring my life is but now that God is putting some action and drama in my life i'm complaining. Today has been a rollercoaster ride for me.
My day started with a really confusing time at work. The whole time that I was in school I was contemplating at the idea of resigning...well actually I wasn't just contemplating I was kinda sure about what I really want. I asked my bestfriend about it and she told me to go for it...according to her I look horrible whenever I'm in school...lol...she said it's actually not good for me.
After work I went straight to the mall. I was supposed to meet my mom but my mom wasn't able to go so i went out shopping on my own. I splurged on books and cd's:) I actually felt happy for a while. While I was drinking coffee at Figaro I got a text message from my dad telling me he got my email...the one about his mistress. He claims nothing happened to them and he asked for my forgiveness...there's really no way for me to know whether he's telling the truth...but I have no choice but to take his word for it...who am i to not forgive??? When I got home he said sorry and hugged me really tightly. I don't know what'll happen...I really hope he's telling the truth.
I wanted to cry but of course I couldn't do it while I was still at the mall...so I cried when I got in the car. I cried all the way home.
This whole experience of mine seem like a really baaaaaad experience but I actually got something good out of it. It made me realize that I should put my trust in man alone...people will fail me...even those that I love and those who love me...I should put my trust in God alone. this experience made me stronger in my faith. It's as if God allowed this really bad thing to happen to me so that I'll finally let go of everything and leave it all up to Him...trust that God is in control. For the past years it felt like I've been running from God...I've been trying to hide from Him...this time I'm ready to give my life to Him.
Current Mood: enlightened
Current Music: Everything by Lifehouse |