| Why is this happening??? |
[11 Nov 2003|07:11pm] |
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REM everybody hurts |
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Ok this has been the hardest couple of days!
ive never cried so much in my life!
Karrie and had the biggest fight about how we arent friends anymore. Its because im such a bad person and! The reason that ive lost her as a friend is down to me!
i know who i am now and im goin to change myself completely. Everything about me! i dont want to be this evil person everyone sees me as. I hate myself so much and i dont want to. I dont want to feel down about myself cause i hate that, i realy do! Everyone is turning their back on me and i hate it so much. Maybe its what i deserve. But i know that one thing is for certain, no words can describe how sorry i am, not only sorry to you Karrie but to everyone who has ever known me. Im sorry for everyting ive ever done wrong. Im sorry, im so sorry.
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[09 Nov 2003|01:16pm] |
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Stacie Orrico stuck (quite catchy) |
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Hey hey!
Went to annabananas last night with debs. There was quite alot of others there aswel! It was a really good night, a kinda bonfire/cocktail party was suposed to stay but thought it was best if i didnt coz i've got loads of people comin over today. Ashley H is doing aromatherepy at college so she was using her knowledge to destress my shoulders! It was very good! Cheers Ashley.
Busy day today dont have time to study or do do homework, what ashame!
Im going to watch the salon now its so sad but i think im addicted to it!!!!
yasssss, lewis is coming over today!!!!!!!!!
xxxxxx
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[07 Nov 2003|09:03pm] |
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yeah yeah yeahs, date with the night |
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Night in tonight coz ive got the cold! boooo!
I was speaking to Chris after school today! i love him sooo much! im really gald that we've kept in contact after all these years! he's coming up on sunday to see my nephew so that should be fun!
Can't believe that Debies big sis didnt manage to sing at the MTV awards (cause of her throat!) I think that Debs and i were more gutted than Judith lol!
Ross keeps giving me dirty looks! i wanna tell him to get a fucking grip! if u ever read this Ross im sorry but i just wanted friendship theres no need to be a complete fuck wit about it all! im sorry i made a mistake but i do want to have your friendship! i've known you too long just to throw it all away!
Lorna and Scally go their tickets for Austrailia so this means im deffo going to visit in the summer! (YASSSS).
Its gonna be so hard not seeing Lorna for a year but at leats i'll be their in the summer! God i can't wait!
Need to start some Crimbo shopping soon! yay!
Soooooooooooooooooooo happy for Fiona. Her and Cartney are made for one another! Shes really behaving her self around other guys which means she likes him alot!
Also very happy fo steph! Her and Strath are lovley together!!!! YAY TO THE LOVED UP COUPLES!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok i think i gots to go for now!
hugs and kisses!
xxxxx
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[07 Nov 2003|09:03pm] |
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mood |
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sleepy |
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yeah yeah yeahs, date with the night |
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Night in tonight coz ive got the cold! boooo!
I was speaking to Chris after school today! i love him sooo much! im really gald that we've kept in contact after all these years! he's coming up on sunday to see my nephew so that should be fun!
Can't believe that Debies big sis didnt manage to sing at the MTV awards (cause of her throat!) I think that Debs and i were more gutted than Judith lol!
Ross keeps giving me dirty looks! i wanna tell him to get a fucking grip! if u ever read this Ross im sorry but i just wanted friendship theres no need to be a complete fuck wit about it all! im sorry i made a mistake but i do want to have your friendship! i've known you too long just to throw it all away!
Lorna and Scally go their tickets for Austrailia so this means im deffo going to visit in the summer! (YASSSS).
Its gonna be so hard not seeing Lorna for a year but at leats i'll be their in the summer! God i can't wait!
Need to start some Crimbo shopping soon! yay!
Soooooooooooooooooooo happy for Fiona. Her and Cartney are made for one another! Shes really behaving her self around other guys which means she likes him alot!
Also very happy fo steph! Her and Strath are lovley together!!!! YAY TO THE LOVED UP COUPLES!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok i think i gots to go for now!
hugs and kisses!
xxxxx
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| I LOVE PLACEBO!!! (jst thought id let ya know) |
[06 Nov 2003|07:38pm] |
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Stacie Orrico more to life |
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Yet another boring day!!!!!
Went to see a french film and got off 1-3 period, it was quite good but these fucking twats from another school were being little knob ends and i felt like abusing them all. hehe.
Was thinking about some stuff, like how i always loose my mates. I just wish that i could keep my friends instead of loosing them all.
The first time it happened was in abot second year and if i could turn back time i would change things. If that person reads this i want you to know that im not really a bitch and that i am really sorry. You were my first proper best mate and it just so happend i made a mess of things.(i hope you know who who are)*just had to get that off my chest*
I really wish that me and Kaz were still close. I dont even know her anymore its as if shes just some stanger. I have tried to fix things between us but i feel that im the only one putting in the effort. Mind you she has Laura now.
I should cheer up cause i now that i have other amazing friends like Debs, i love her to bits!!!!!!!
I think im going out with Ana this weekend should be a laugh, shes my wee drunken mate(and my newly adopted child). Speaking of adoption im gonna adopt a Tibetian baby when im older. (RANDOM)
Im hopefully going to Austrailia for the summer to visit my sis lorna and her girlfriend Scally. im gonna do everything their i cant wait to surf. Im so looking forward to it. just hope things work out ok and i hope the parentals let me!
Anyway im gonna study tonight and do some homework! (arghhhhh).
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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| Hey |
[05 Nov 2003|05:52pm] |
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Zombie the cranberries |
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This is my very first diary entry all thanks to my mate Rachael!
Well today was shit because it was wednessday which means i was at school! I so dont pay attention and im gonna fail these bloody standard grades and i'll get my ass kicked also im still choked up with the cold (poor me).
my nephew was born a week ago and he is soo beautiful. His name is lewis and he is perfect, i love him so much.
Just gonna listen to some music and go see some fire works with little Lewy(my sis hates me calling him that)!
Love you all
Ainsley! xxxx
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