Michelle's journal

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Monday, January 16th, 2006
6:53 am
I wish Blurty was as good as Live Journal so I could use it again...I miss all the people on here :( Come say hi to me at Live journal if you'd like http://www.livejournal.com/users/rainbowmoondrop and I also have a Myspace account too at http://www.myspace.com/geishakittykat Come see me peeps. *hugs* Ciao for now! ♥Me

current mood: curious
current music: "Junkie" ~ Poe

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Friday, November 26th, 2004
11:58 pm
I don't post here anymore. I got sick of Blurty fucking up. Live Journal is a ton better. Come visit my journal at:

http://www.livejournal.com/users/rainbowmoondrop

Hope to see you over at live journal :)

<3 Me

current mood: devious

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11:57 pm
I messed up :)

current mood: dorky

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Friday, October 8th, 2004
5:00 pm
So, I'm debating about whether staying here or going to Live Journal. The one person who reads my journals went to live journal, and says it's bunches better, so I dunno. I think I'm going to try it out and see what I think.

current mood: optimistic

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Sunday, September 26th, 2004
9:15 pm - BABY IS HERE!!!!!!!!!!
I'm sorry I haven't been online lately, but I've been busy with my newborn little baby boy!!!!! His name is Jared Martin. He's so precious. I love him so much, it's rediculous. He was 8 lbs. and 11 oz. and he was 22 inches long. I had no stitches or an episotomy :) Happy about that!! I did end up getting an epidural. It was god sent :) Well, I do have a picture on the baby's web nursery. It's here: http://www.growingfamily.com/webnursery/babypage_view.asp?URLID=0F2G1W9Q8F
Well, I've got to go, I will definitely be back sometime soon with some more pictures :) Well, ciao for now peoples. <3 Me

current mood: ecstatic

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Friday, September 17th, 2004
10:41 pm
So I missed my ultrasound and I'm really pissed that I did. They can only do ultrasounds on Thursdays though because that's the only day that the techinician is there. So, I don't know if the baby is too big or not. Who knows. Looks like I'm at least waiting until Monday to find anything else out. They had me go in today though for another stress test although I don't have any clue why. Whatever I guess. I've had two people tell me to drink some Castroil and that it'll send me into labor. It's like an old time laxative. This one chic swears by it, and this guy says his wife did it as well. I dunno though. I don't really feel like having to go to the bathroom every two seconds just so I can have the baby. I'm hoping baby decides to do something tomorrow so it can be born on my dad's birthday. That would be awesome. I dunno though. I somehow doubt that baby's going to do anything until it's made to. I just don't see me going into labor naturally. Who knows though. So I got nice new sheets from my mommy. She got me pale green egyptian cotton (400 thread count) :) Oh yes, they feel absolutley lovely. I was all excited about them, and I told Jason he wasn't aloud to sleep in them until he took a shower, and I took a shower, so we did, and then I made the bed, and got in. It was orgasmic. The sheets are soooo nice. I was sitting there thinking that my water better not break on those nice new sheets or I will be pissed. I dunno. I'm tired. I was reading this magazine and it said that in your 9th month your body is pumping over 45% more blood than usual which makes you feel sleepy. Well they're definitely right about that. Oh, and the director of nursing at the hospital called me and reassured that a complaint was made and it will go on his record, and that I will never have to deal with him again if he's the one on call. THANK GOD. I was very happy. I told my doctor, and he called and talked to the director at the hospital. I love my doctor. He rocks. He just needs to induce my labor, and then he'll be my hero :) Well, I'm going to get off here for now. Hopefully I'll go into labor tonight and I won't have time to update tomorrow, but I probly won't. Well Ciao for now! <3 Me

current mood: tired

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Wednesday, September 15th, 2004
9:36 pm
So today's doctor appointment was nothing special. It was in fact not my last appointment. He said I'm not dilated and my cervix is not "ripe" enough to be induced, so I have to wait. :( Boo hoo. Well tomorrow I have to go in at 8:15 a.m. to get an ultrasound. Not my idea of fun, but we have to get one to make sure the baby's not too big. If it is too big they'll have to do a C-section. Again, not my idea of fun. But oh well. Other than that my next appointment is on Monday, and if I haven't gone by then, they're going to plan an induction date. *sigh* I so just want this baby to come out!!!! Well, baby's okay and everything. I was monitored for close to an hour so everything is fine and dandy. I just don't know how much longer I can take this. I'm SOOOOOOOOOO tired of being pregnant!! I just can't wait for this baby to come out. I want to meet my baby and hold it and see what the baby looks like! I'm so anxious and excited that I don't know if I can make it to Monday. *sigh* I guess I have to. Well, I'm gonna get off here for now. I'll be back on later probly. Ciao for now! <3 Me

current mood: excited

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Tuesday, September 14th, 2004
9:18 pm
So, tomorrow is the big day. It's my offical last doctor visit. If I don't go into labor tonight, they're going to schedule an induction for like 3 or 4 days after that. AWESOME! I can't wait. I just hope to god that I get some doctors who aren't bastards like I did last time. At least I can rest assured that I won't have that one dude again. So yeah. I go in tomorrow at 3:15 p.m. for a stress test and they monitor me for 30 minutes, and then I meet with the doctor again. I wonder if they'll schedule it for September 19th. My dad would go throw the friggin roof, if his first born grandson was born on his birthday. He would be completely thrilled. Maybe I can request it or something. I dunno. I kinda want the baby to have it's own birthday though. I guess I'll just see. Oh this is just so crazy to know that I'm going to be having a baby in the next week. Yeah! So, I figured out what song is in Royal Tennenbaums when Richie (Luke Wilson) is planning on killing himself. I've been trying to figure out what the hell it was, and now I know. It's "Needle In the Hay" by Elliott Smith. Go listen to it. It rocks. It's so pretty and sad. What's even worse is that the whole scene is about suicide, and Elliott Smith actually committed suicide. I remember reading it in my Blender Magazine. He stabbed himself in the heart, which most people considered very appropriate because of all of his tormented painful melancholy music. I think that's sad. Man, he had to really fucking stab himself hard. To get through the breast plate and in between ribs, and ugh. That's just crazy to think that someone can be that determined to die that they want to die such a painful death. It's sad. He's an awesome musician too. I looked up his other stuff, and listened to a couple of clips on CDNOW and wow. He's awesome. Speaking of CDNOW I would like to thank whoever decided to put little clips of EVERY track of each c.d. on CDNOW. It used to have it, and then stupid ass Amazon took it over, and it's gone to hell ever since, but now it's a lot better. So Thank You. Anyways, I can't wait 'til tonights episode of Nip/Tuck. I'm addicted to the damn show. AND I can say that I liked it before it ever got popular thank you very much. The only reason I started watching was because while flipping through the channels one night, and it was the episode where Shawn's son was circumsizing himself. Yeah...it was kind of an eye catching scene. LOL, well anyways, I'm gonna get off here now. I'll be back on tomorrow to tell ya'll how my appointment went. Ciao for now peoples. <3 Me

current mood: okay
current music: Needle In The Hay ~ Elliott Smith

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Monday, September 13th, 2004
12:49 am
So yesterday was one of the most traumatic experiences of my whole life. Well, we thought my water may have broken. I couldn't tell if it was from sweat, because of the heat outside, or if it could habe been my water. It looked like I may have dropped so I called my doctor. He said that if anymore water leaks after an hour, to go ahead and go to the hospital. Well, I waited an hour and not much was going on. I called the doctor back and told him and he said well, go ahead and go up there just to make sure it hasn't ruptured, so I did. I got there and was pushed in a wheel chair by some 20 year old guy, which kind of pissed me off, because he was pushing me so fast that Jason couldn't keep up, and I really just wanted to hold his hand. All in all it just made me angry. So we got upstairs, and I got checked in, and then the nurse came in and told me to strip down, and put the gown and this elastic waist thingy on. So I did and she came back and hooked me up to a monitor. It was neat. I got to sit and listen to the baby's heart beat and listen to it move around for a while. I was getting really nervous. Then it happened. The biggest asshole on the face of the earth came in. He was the resident doctor. He was an asshole to me, and treated me like shit, and just acted like he had no time to put up with my bullshit. So, first they did a pelvic exam. I was lying on the bed, and when he went to put the speculum thing in my I kind of flinched and he was like "Look, you need to just stay still, and not move. It's not going to hurt." The way he said it pissed me off. He was really rude and snide. So I tried to relax, and it didn't hurt too bad, but it did kind of ache. Then came the worst part. He told me he was going to examine me, which consists of him putting his fingers in me to check if my cervix is dillated. Now, I've been thru this before with my doctor, so I wasn't too concerned. But I flinched again and he was like "Stop moving." and then he "examined" me. It hurt me so bad that I was screaming "Ow" and he was yelling at me saying "This shouldn't hurt" and I was like "WELL IT DOES" and I was lying there balling my eyes out because he wouldn't stop, and he just kept jamming his fingers in further and I was like yelling from the pain and clawing the shit out of Jason's hand. The guy was a prick. He didn't fucking care that he was hurting me whatsoever. I want to fucking kill him. It really pissed me off, and I feel really violated about the whole issue. I'm still very upset. I feel like I was raped. That's how violated I feel. It's a sensitive part of my body for him to just be hurting me and not giving a fuck. I'm really angry and really pissed off and upset. I do not want to go back to that hospital. My mom told me to call and complain. And I did, and I told them to put a note on my record saying that I NEVER WANT HIM NEAR ME AGAIN. I also filed a complaint with the nurse, and she said she would speak to the senior director about it. I don't know. I'm just really upset and angered about the whole situation and I hope to get him fired.

current mood: irate

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Wednesday, September 8th, 2004
11:59 pm - No baby yet....
So I went to the doctor today, and he said I'm not ready to have the baby :( Boo hoo...the baby's due date has now come and gone. My next doctor's appointment is September 15th, and if the baby hasn't come by then, my next appointment would be 3 or 4 days from then, so the baby has a possibility to be born on my dad's birthday which is the 19th. That would be cool. He'd be thrilled, especially if it was a little boy. I dunno, I'm just so anxious for this baby that I can't think about anything else. I just wanted to update you guys, I gotta get off here for now. I'll be back on Friday. <3 Me

current mood: anxious

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11:50 pm - A Survey!
I took this from Alisun's website. Minus the sexual stuff, cause that's for Boo to know only ;)

--- first name: Amy
--- middle name: Michelle
--- gender: female
--- age: 20
--- birthday: January 31st
--- height: 5’10”
--- hair color: Brown for now. Used to be purple, pink, red...
--- eye color: Blue
--- do you wear glasses or contacts: Nope.
--- do you have braces: No, I’ve been lucky enough to avoid them.
--- is your hair long or short: I guess it’s considered long. It’s past my shoulders
--- where were you born: Cincinnati, Ohio
--- current location: Lebanon, Ohio
--- zodiac sign: Aquarius
--- how many languages do you know: 3-English, French, and Spanish. I can’t speak Spanish at all anymore, but I can speak French very well.
--- nationality: American
--- bad habits: I have a really bad sweet tooth that I can’t ignore :)
--- piercing's you have: Just two in the ears. I used to have my cartilage pierced, but it closed up on me :(
--- piercing's you want: Don’t really want anymore. Maybe a couple of more in the ears, but that’s it.
--- tattoos you have: None.
--- tattoos you want: I still want my Hello Kitty tattoo!

. : pets :
--- do you have any pets: Dog (actually my parents) 1 Shovel Nose Catfish, 1 Tiger Shovel Nose Catfish, 1 Blue Gurami, 1 Exotic Goldfish, 1 Goldfish, 2 plecostomus’, and I have 2 Pirahnas...Jason is a bit obsessed with fish...
--- what are their names: Dog-Bandit, Shovel Nose – Pink Floyd, Tiger Shovel Nose – Tigger, Gurami – Caleb, Exotic Goldfish – Pekkle, Goldfish – Coca, Plecostums – Pleko, and unnamed, Pirahnas – Jaws and Tweek.

. : favorites : .
--- clothing brand: My favorite is probably Dehlia’s.
--- shoes: My stilettos. They may kill my feet, but god damn do I feel sexy in them!
--- saying: “Practice safe sex...Go fuck yourself!”
--- sport: Jason’s got me into Hockey a little bit. Even though I don’t get it all, it’s still fun to watch.
--- movie: It's a tie between "But I'm a Cheerleader!", "Ghost World", "Dogma", "Nightmare Before Christmas", "The Big Lebowski", “Not Another Teen Movie”, "Rules of Attraction", and "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind"
--- actor: Steve Buscemi by far. Cuteness wise Johnny Depp.
--- actress: Thora Birch, Christina Ricci, Sandra Bullock, Madeline Kahn,
--- gum: Bubble Gum flavored Orbitz.
--- scent: Women’s: Very Irresistible by Givenchi, Luck You, and Lolita Lempicka. Men’s: Very Sexy by Victoria Secret.
---candy bar: Butterfinger and Crunch.
--- ice cream flavor: Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough, Cookies and Cream, Ben and Jerry’s: One Sweet Whirled and Phish Food.
--- color: Rainbow!
--- season: Fall because of the weather.
--- holiday: Christmas adn Christmas Eve.
--- band: They Might Be Giants, Pink Floyd, Poe, Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, The Beatles, Sublime, I could go on and on, but those are the main ones.
--- type of music: Probly techno cause it always makes me happy and puts me in a good mood, but I like it all really.
--- thing in your room: My comforter!!! It’s velvet! *le sigh*
--- place to be: In my Boo’s arms.
--- tv channel: Mtv, Vh1, M2, Vh1 Classic, Animal Planet, Cartoon Network, The N (they show old My So Called Life episodes!!!!!!), History Channel, Discovery Channel, Discovery Health Channel, GSN, and FX.
--- junk food: Ice Cream all the way!!!!
--- overall food: Chinese food. Specifically Crab Rangoon....mmmmm....
--- store: Pier 1 Imports, Hot Topic, Dehlia’s, Charlotte Russe, CD Game Exchange, and Barnes and Noble.
--- fast food: Long John Silver’s.
--- time of day: Dusk. I like when the sun sets and it gets all cool outset, and the sky looks pretty.
--- shampoo: Herbal Essence’s Rose shampoo and conditioner.
--- board game: CRANIUM!!!!! And my DVD Trivial Pursuit.
--- computer game: Text Twist on Yahoo.
--- car: ’57 Chevy, and a Purple Prowler.
--- music video: “Smack My Bitch Up” by Prodigy or “Setting Sun” by Chemical Brothers...ahh the memories...
--- swear word: I use fuck often.
--- word: Lilac or Squirrel cause they’re fun to say.
--- month: January...cause it’s my birth month!
--- scary movie: I love all of the Silence of the Lambs movies.
--- possession: Ummm...I guess my car cause I use it the most and it’s the most handy.

. : private life : .
--- do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend: Yes.
--- do you have a crush: On my Boo :)
--- do you love anyone right now: Yes.
--- have you ever been in love: Yes.
--- how many people of you kissed: To be honest I dunno...
--- who was your first kiss: This boy named Will that I went to Kindergarten with.
--- how many hearts have you broken: I know of at least one person.
--- how many people broke your heart: 1.
--- best quote to sum up love: "Love is to give until you can’t give anymore”
--- do you go by looks or personality: No matter what anyone says looks ALWAYS start the relationship but if they’re missing a good personality, it doesn’t even matter.
--- ever kiss a friend: Yes.
--- are you still friends: Yes.
--- do you smoke: Used to...
--- do you smoke weed: Used to...
--- ever trip on acid: No, and thank god, I know I wouldn’t be able to handle it.
--- how about a little x: Nope. I wanted to at one point, but I’m over it.
--- beer good or beer bad: Nasty.
--- are you the sissy who drinks wine coolers: Yesiree. It tastes better than beer by a long shot.
--- do you like smirnoff ice: I used to until I drank it too much, now it makes me sick...
--- prefer beer or liquor: Liquor
--- what kind of cigarettes do you smoke: Don’t smoke.
--- are you a virgin: Obviously not. If I was then I'd be the virging Mary.

. : would you ever : .
---- bungee jump: Sure.
--- sky dive: Yeah.
--- swim with dolphins: Definintely.
---scuba dive: If I learned how to first.
--- go rock climbing: I dunno, I have absolutely NO upper body strength.
--- eat shit for $1,000,000: That’s gross....
--- turn your back on your friends for personal gain: No.
--- steal a friend's boyfriend/girlfriend: No.
--- cross-dress: Dressing like a guy doesn’t phase me...
--- lie to the police: If I had to...
--- run from the police: Again, If I had to...but probly not cause they’d catch me anyways...
--- lie to your parents: I have, but not anymore.
--- walk up to a stranger and kiss them: No.
--- be an exotic dancer: LOL, yeah right...I would suck at it...
--- walk out of a restaurant without paying: Possibly...
--- streak: Already done it.

. : have you ever : .
--- told the person you liked how you felt: All the time.
--- been to Michigan: Nope.
--- gotten really REALLY wasted: Yeah.
--- gone to jail or juvi: Nope.
--- skateboarded: Yes.
--- skinny dipped: Yes.
--- stolen anything: Yeah.
--- kicked someone's ass: Oh yeah...
--- pegged someone in the head with a snowball: Definitely.
--- broke a beer bottle: Yeah. I like the sound of breaking glass.
--- gotten into a bar, under-aged: Yeah for my sister’s bachlorette party.
--- flipped someone off: Who hasn’t?
--- gone on a road trip: Yeah.
--- gone on vacation without adult supervision: Not yet.
--- been to a concert: Yes.
--- been to another country: Yup! Canada!!! YEAH CANADA!!!
--- talked back to an adult: Yuppers.
--- got pulled over: Oh yeah.
--- got in a car accident: Not while driving.
--- broke a law: Yeah.
--- given money to a homeless person: Yeah.
--- tried to kill yourself: Nope. I’ve used to be masochistic though.
--- cried to get out of trouble: Yeah when I was little.
--- kissed a friend's brother or sister: Yup.
--- kissed a brother or sister's friend: No.
--- dropped something on the floor that you were cooking and let someone eat it anyways: Not to my recollection...

.: now :.
--- what are you eating: Nothing.
--- what are you drinking: Water.
--- what are you wearing: T-Shirt and my mom’s shorts cause I’m doing laundry.
--- any shoes on: Nope.
--- hair: In a pony tail.
--- listening to: The t.v. in the other room.

. : random questions : .
--- are you a vegetarian: I wish I had the will power to be one...
--- do you like cows: They’re cool I guess...
--- are you a bitch: When I wanna be.
--- are you artistic: I’d say so.
--- do you write poetry: Occasionally.
--- are you a fast runner: Uhh no.
--- can you ski: Never tried.
--- do the voices talk to you: Yup.
--- did you ever give barbie a haircut: Yeah but I had the kind where if you pulled on her hair, more would come out.
--- would you eat mac & cheese with hotdogs in it: Sure. I like ketchup on mine though
--- do you think disney creators were on acid when they made 'alice in wonderland': First of all that’s impossible because the cartoon was created before L.S.D. was invented, and second of all it’s just based on the book by Lewis Carroll. Now, he on the other hand did experiment with some Opium I believe...
--- are you straight: Yeah.
--- are you fat: I’m pregnant at the moment, so I do weigh a lot more than usual.
--- are you skinny: Um, no.
--- are you short: Nope.
--- are you tall: Yup.
--- do you own a hot pink shirt: I don’t think so....
--- how about orange pants: No.
--- are you evil: No.
--- did you ever know someone who had a mullet: Yeah, my friend’s dad, but that was before the term mullet was around. We called it Hockey Hair.
--- are you secretly from another planet: Not that I’m aware of...
--- did you ever touch someone else's private parts: Um, yeah, how else do you think that I got pregnant?
--- do you shop at hot topic: Yesiree!
--- if you could be any animal, what would you be: A horse because their one of my favorite animals. Or a penguin.
--- if you had to eat one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be: Pizza, because there’s some variety.
--- do you remember any of your dreams: Yeah.
--- do you dream in color or black and white: I’ve never had a dream in black and white...
--- do you admit when you need help with a problem: For the most part I guess.
--- can people read you like a book: Sometimes.
--- what's your biggest fear: Dying alone.
--- do you talk a lot: Yeah.
--- are you afraid of clowns: No, but then again I never went to a circus when I was little to be traumatized about it either.
--- do you like spiders: No I do not.
--- can you drive: Yes, although Jason would disagree.
--- are you spoiled: :)
--- are you anti-social: No.
--- do you see dead people: No.

. : SUBMITTED : .
--- What do you look for and like in a guy? Long hair, a sense of music, a good personality and someone who treats me right.
--- What does your room look like? It’s a hippy room with candles and incense and paintings from renaissance festival.
--- What is your bra size? You wouldn’t believe it if I told you...
--- Shoe size? 10
--- How do you dress? Right now comfortably. Anything that doesn’t restrict my huge belly.
--- Do you wear thongs? Yes.
--- Do you shave and or trim your bikini line? Yes.
--- When is the last time you went on a date? God, I don’t even know. It was with Jason a while ago. We don’t really go on dates anymore, we just cuddle and enjoy each other’s company.
--- Had sex? A few days ago.
--- Did drugs? A long time ago, and never again.
--- Drink? Again, a looong time ago.
--- Smoke? A long time ago.
--- What's the one thing you regret doing the most? Nothing. Because I believe that everything I’ve ever done has lead me to the point where I am now, and I would change nothing about my life now.
--- If you could go anywhere in the world where would it be? Japan!!!!! I would flip if I got to go there.
--- Do you prefer standard or automatic? I’ve only driven an automatic.
--- What do you want most in the world? To be a good mom.
--- Which would you rather have, big wedding or small one? Big :)
--- Do you drink a lot? No. I don’t at all.
--- What's the craziest thing you've ever done? I dunno...
--- What's the meanest thing you've ever done to someone? Ripping this bitches’ earrings out of her ears. Although only one truly ripped out.
--- What is your favorite part of your body? My eyes.
--- What part would you change? This big baby inside my stomach would be on the outside :)
--- When was your last boyfriend? Currently...He's the last one I'll have :)

current mood: nerdy
current music: Far Away ~ Candlebox

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Sunday, September 5th, 2004
11:26 pm
I said I'd come back and update and so here I am :) Well, I think the baby may be coming soon. I went out with my mom to the grocery store, and I felt sick. I think it's cause I ate too many potato chips, but then we went to the store, and I started getting tight cramps in my stomach every so often. I only had like 5 of them though, and now that I'm being lazy and not walking around, they've gone away for the most part. I'm getting little tiny something or others, but nothing like it was at the store. I'm tempted to go walk around the block until the baby decides to come, but the doctor would flip out on me and say "You're on half bed rest!!!! You're not supposed to go walking!!!" *sigh* It sucks. I just want this baby to get here already. Well, tomorrow is Labor Day, so maybe baby will decide to be really cute, and send me into Labor for the occasion. I dunno. I just hope that I won't have to go to my doctor's appointment on Wednesday. I'm hoping I won't make it. That'd be nice. Well I got stuff for a me and Boo day today. He was telling me last night that he feels like I don't want him anymore, which is completely not true at all. I'm just scared to hurt the baby. But I felt so bad. I love him so much and I don't want him thinking that at all, so we're going to have a Jason et Moi day :) Maybe take a bath together, and get some massages or something. Who knows. Maybe we won't be able to cause the baby will come. I dunno. Ugh, I have ate nothing today but chips, a double chocolate chip frappuccino, and a kit kat. I'm hungry...it's still a few more hours 'til Jason gets off work...BAH! I dunno. LOL, I think my mom is watching Jurassic Park. I haven't watched that movie in ages. I dunno. Anyways, I think I'm gonna go for tonight. Hopefully, I won't be updating tomorrow because I'll be too busy in the hospital having my baby :) Ciao for now! <3 Me

current mood: hungry

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4:41 pm - Please let the baby come today!
Sorry I haven't been on to update. I've been kinda busy being lazy :) Well, still no baby. I'm pretty pissed. LOL, I told Jason that if by the 8th the baby hasn't came yet, I'm going to pop my own water so they have to induce me. Ugh, I'm just getting so impatient because everyone keeps saying "Any day now..." and there's just no sign of the baby coming. I've had some cramps, but I mean, nothing to say "YOU MIGHT GO INTO LABOR TODAY!" Just little inconsistent cramps. Also, the baby hasn't dropped yet. It's still pretty high in my belly. However I have been having to go to the bathroom a lot more lately. Through out this whole pregnancy I've been pretty good about not having to go to the bathroom every two seconds, but now I have to get up like twice in the night to go to the bathroom. Oooh I just don't know. I looked up the baby's personality thing in this book that I LOVE that I still don't have for some fucked up reason. It's called "The Secret Language of Birthdays" It fucking ROCKS!! Anyone reading this has to go check it out. It's got a personality overview for every day of the year and it tells you about your health habits, and who was born on your day. And I've never had anyone tell me that it's wrong either. Everybody says "Wow! That's pretty accurate!" So please do yourself a favor and check it out! LOL, Anyways, I was reading all the possible days through out this week and today is actually the day that I like the most. I hope the baby comes today!! Well, I've got to go do some running with my mom. I'll be back to update later. Ciao for now! <3 Me

current mood: hopeful

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Sunday, August 29th, 2004
7:27 pm
So I got woken up today to Jason's brother knocking on our bedroom window. Needless to say I was not a happy camper. But Jason made it all better. He was being a doll all last night and wanted to cuddle and be sweet. I love it when he gets in those moods. It's nice. I wish he was in that mood more often, but I guess then I wouldn't appreciate it as much. I think he was probly horny, but I just was not in the physical state to do that. I haven't been. He told me about this lady he works with who miscarried her baby because she had sex with her boyfriend (even though the doctor said not to) and some weird shit happened that made her lose the baby. Needless to say she was only 5 months along, not 9 like me, but still, it kinda scared me. I feel bad though, and I worry that he'll find loving somewhere else if I don't love on him every once in a while, but I know I'm being rediculous. He just wants me to be comfortable, and safe. But yeah, I got up this morning and I immediately gagged. Don't really know what that was about...I didn't throw up, just gagged and then spit, and then I was okay. Weirdness...but his brother came over to pay him back some money he owed him which is good. Then he left and me and Jason got back into bed :) Lovey Dove. He said that we should start playing the lottery because when we win then we can just lay in bed all day with eachother <3 what a sweetie. Then we fell back asleep, woke back up to the alarm, called my parents to find out when they were gonna pick us up to take us to my Aunt's house warming party, and then went back to sleep :) Then they called to say they were on there way, and we still slept for a little bit, then got up. I love my boo. He rocks. I really couldn't see myself with anybody else right now, or ever for that matter. I love him soo so much. He needs to marry me. LOL. I keep bringing it up, and I know he wants to, and plans on it, but I realize he doesn't have the funds for a ring right now. He hates it when I bring it up though, cause he's like "Amy, I'm supposed to ask you, not the other way around." LOL, but last night he said "Amy Michelle Shuhart....you're name would sound good with my name at least. A lot of other girls I've dated it doesn't sound right. Maybe that means something, maybe it means that I love you." Awww, what a sweet little boo :) I love him. I feel all giddy just being with him right now. He said "Now we're going to be a happy little family of three!". Okay he was just on a roll last night...LOL...I LOVE MY BOO!!!!!!!!!!

current mood: loved
current music: Possession ~ Sarah McLachlan

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Tuesday, August 24th, 2004
11:24 pm - Love to Blurty!!!
YEAH!!!!!!! My Bats are moving again!!!!!!!

current mood: geeky

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11:11 pm
Sorry about not updating folks. I'm a bad girl I know...so I went to the doctor on the 19th, and my blood pressure was high, once again so he said that I'm on "half" bed rest. Basically I can't take any prolonged walks (no mall shopping :( ) and no strenuous activities. Bah. At least I'm not on full bed rest. My sister's friend had preclampsia when she had her baby, and she was completly bed ridden for the last 3 months of her pregnancy! I could not even imagine that. I go to the doctor tomorrow though, so if my blood pressure is still high, he might do that to me...:( boo hoo that would suck. Well, I'm getting pretty impatient. I went last time and got ANOTHER pelvic exam, and he said that I'm half efaced, but not dilated at all. He said that's pretty normal and typical for where I'm at. Yeah me. I just want this baby to be born already. I packed my suitcase for the trip to the hospital and everything. My mom bought me some really nice stuff. She bought the baby's mobile, bought me a gown, and an house coat thingy with matching pink slippers, she bought me my breast pump and diaper genie, AND she bought me some nursing bras. I love my mommy. She's the bestest in the whole worldest :) I hope I'm as good of a mommy to my baby as my mommy is to me. I love my parents. They're so awesome. I feel so bad for the whole rebellious teenage stage. But whatever. So hopefully tomorrow when I go to the doctor he'll say "Amy, it's time to have the baby, go straight to the hospital!" LOL, well I'm gonna get offa here. Oh yeah, I updated my website, and there's MORE baby pictures up. Go check them out!!!! http://www.geocities.com/shy_violet_4/AmyPage.html or the direct link http://www.geocities.com/shy_violet_4/BabyPictures.html Well, Ciao for now peeps! <3 Me

current mood: hopeful

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Sunday, August 15th, 2004
10:58 pm
Okay, so things have gotten better since the last time that I updated...I went to my doctors appointment. First they took my weight, then she asked for a urine sample, so I went into the bathroom, and low and behold, somehow I forgot until I was already finished. I tried to go again, but couldn't and apologized to the nurse. She said it was okay, and took me to the room. She came in and took my blood pressure and said "Are you nervous, or stressed?" and I said, "Yeah" and she said, "well we'll retest in a bit". (that's how nervous I was...It was affecting my blood pressure...) While waiting for the doctor I proceeded to get so nervous and upset that I started crying, and I mean almost to the point where I couldn't stop. Jason had to calm me down. I was so so SOOOOOO scared about what was going to happen, that I just couldn't even think. Then the doctor came in and I asked if he was going to try to turn the baby and he said that they only do that in hospitals in case I went into labor, so they wouldn't be doing it today. That made me very happy. Then he proceeded to examine me, (No more belly checks for me, now they're all pelvic exams :S....EVERY WEEK!!) and I was not dilated one bit. Then he tried to feel where the head was (REALLY UNCOMFORTABLE AND PAINFUL because he was doing it from inside...ugh) Then he asked me "Are you sure the baby is breech?" and I said yes, the techinician, and the doctor told me so. So he said well hang on a second, and gave the baby a sonogram and he said "Well, that's exactly where I would expect the heartbeat to be if it were NOT breech." Then he said, "Well, let's go ahead and get an ultrasound to make sure", so Jason and I waited for the ultrasound room to clear out and then we went in and low and behold, my wishes came true. The baby HAD turned around. YEAH!!!!!! I was so happy when he told me that, that I wanted to cry. NO AVERSION TECHNIQUE FOR ME!!!!!!! So, then we went back into the room we were in and the nurse tried to take my blood pressure again, and she said, "Okay, why don't you lay down on your left side, and I'll come back in a couple of minutes to check again", aparently it was still sky high. I started to get freaked out a bit and so did Jason. I laid there and he tried to calm me down, and I proved him wrong via this little chart thingy that menstration is when the lining of your uterus sheds, not when you lose an egg (...it's been an ongoing debate between us...), anywho, the nurse came back in, retested my blood pressure for the 3rd time, and she said "Much better" so then we left. So I'm a happy girl for now. I know most of you don't want to hear this, nor do most of you care, but on Saturday my breasts started to leak a bit, which freaked me out. I called Jason at work to tell him even. My mom said it's normal. She said that I probably should be, so that made me feel better. LOL, I bet no men are going to read this entry what with all the woman anatomy talk in such unsexy terms. LOL, oh well. FUCK YOU IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT! You could, nor will you ever understand what a woman goes through physically. Guys have it completely easy. Jason said "Well, I better get prepared for when this baby comes," and I said "What do you have to do? You just sit there and watch". All guys have to do is have an orgasm and *poof* there's a baby. They don't get the joys of stretch marks on their stomachs, massive weight gain, leaky nipples, stitches around their privates, and the immense pain that is child birth. I can't wait to have the baby though, as cynnical as I sound. I am completely excited about the whole thing. A little nervous and scared, but still completely excited and thrilled. I just want to see the baby. I want to see it's face, and whose nose it has, and whose eyes, and how big it is, and how long, and how it acts around me and Jason and everyone. It's going to be so awesome. I can't wait to have this baby!!!! I hope the baby likes me, and doesn't cry when I hold it or something awful like that. I don't think the baby will though. Babies inherently love and like their mommies, cause they know that's where food comes from! LOL, Well I filled out all of my Thank You cards from my baby shower today even though I'm sorta late, but oh well. Better late then never I guess. Well I'm getting tired and it's time to pick up Jason now. (I took a long break in the middle of this entry to watch some of the olympics) Well, I'll be back to update here soon! Ciao for now! <3 Me

current mood: excited

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Wednesday, August 11th, 2004
4:36 pm
So I'm pretty freaked out right now. I might have my baby tomorrow, which is really scary. Reason being, is that the baby is still breech, and they want to try and use the "aversion" technique which basically means that they want to push on my stomach and try to manually by force turn the baby around. Which I've heard is really painful, on top of the fact that the doctor said that sometimes it sends women into labor. I'm really fucking scared. I don't know what to do. I DO NOT want a C-Section, and I'm thinking this is my only chance to get the baby turned around while it's still has some room to move around. I don't know what I want to do. I'm scared that I'm going to go into labor, and the fact that my mom's leaving for Cumberland this weekend doesn't make it any better. I don't want her to not be there when I have the baby. And I don't want them to have to miss their vacation just because of me. I don't know. I'm so scared right now. On top of everything me and Jason are low on money. We finally got billed for electric, and were told that it has to be put in our name by the 30th, which costs $200. On top of the fact that we have to pay rent, and groceries, and gas, and phone. It's just really stressful, and Jason's pissed because I'm not helping him, which he has every right to be mad at me but I can't do anything about it. I can't start a job and then after the first week say "I need two months off". Ya know? I don't know. I feel really bad because I should still have a job, but I don't, and that makes me feel like a bad girlfriend and a dead beat mom. I'm really depressed right now. I don't know what to do. I'm depressed and scared out of my mind. I feel awful and I pretty much have rock bottom self esteem. Well, I'm going to need to pack my suitcase tonight in case I might go into labor tomorrow. I wish things were just easier for us. I wish things were easier for everyone that I love and care about and that everyone could just be happy and live care free. Well, I think I'm going to go now, I have to call a bunch of people before it's too late. Like the pediatrician and such. Well Ciao for now. <3 Me

current mood: scared

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Monday, August 2nd, 2004
11:04 pm
I'm bored. I'm waiting on Jason to get off of work. I found some good news though. I found a lady who's selling Pugs from Dayton for $500 each, which is the cheapest I've found. I want to get one really bad. Jason said he'd go in halves with me on it, which I might just do. That is, when I get a job...I'm such a loser dead beat mom already. I don't even have a job. Hopefully CBS (a temp agency) has something for me. I went in and took this data entry test, and they said that they would send my resumé and my test scores over to them, and that I should hear something back. I REALLY hope I do. I'll work their until I have my baby, and after I have the baby. I don't know if they'll want to hire somebody who's so pregnant, but they're legally not aloud to ask me whether I'm pregnant or not. But now it's PRETTY FREAKING OBVIOUS. I'm pretty big. I still haven't scanned my baby shower pictures. I need to update my website...I'll be back...<3 Me

current mood: bored

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Saturday, July 31st, 2004
7:10 pm
Why are my bats not moving???

current mood: confused

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