23rd October 2003

6:42pm: scatterbrain takes a seat for a second.

i have had a very busy week. working with the band, in the studio, two tracks, wrestling over what we like, what we want to do, what "fun" is, pro-life or pro-choice, bass up or down, accordion or none, scream or not? we are mostly finished, just a few nob-tweaks and we will be on our way to the superstardom that we are destined for. HA!

the recording sounds fantastic. sometimes i can't believe that i'm in this band. good friends, musicians, "the real deal". at all times, in all ways, i am surrounded by amazing people. i know i am blessed. i have a luminous and beautiful sweet heart by my side... i have tasted love... the loss has not overcome me (yet)... i have a chance to be Here... with you... make a difference... talk... cry... Live... share the strange sweet and sour dream of Life... learn to Heal, Love, Laugh, Share, Play, Stop The Whirlwind...? who could ask for such tearjerking beauty? what word would it be in Heaven? what lips could you move? Here is Indescribable for a man with as little mastery of words as i...


i've had a long day. work. work. work. work. surprisingly not as tired as i thought i would be this morning. surprisingly in high spirits. thoughts today? ah... my brain is fried. i thought of too much. i'm not remembering in this moment.

elliott smith.
kurt cobain.
sylvia plath.

i had so much to say yesterday about death. suicide. life. and sadness. today... i can't muster up the thoughts. the muse she left me with myself for a moment.

life is for living. why do so few of us Live It? why is it... there is disease, sickness, sadness, death, murder, violence, pollution, etc., etc., in it's Extreme Form, everywhere? we must not know

we could heal our wounds, if we only knew we could.
Current Mood: blah
Current Music: -NED- at top volume.
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