i shall not wander through shards of glass that you have slowly made unto me. i shall not breathe for the justification of the stolen slumber which i have slowly come to endure. I shall not caress the wings of the crow that has brought you to me through the maws of first circle of hell. i shall embrace that which has become faithful. i shall kiss the wounds of a marred face and challenge all fortitude in your distinction of reality. what has become to be known is not that which has been known before but that all things to be known are forgotten within thyself and in thyself i shall slip into comatose where no wind shall brustle me and no tonic shall challenge it. it will be as such for those who have nothing to remember as such. i will be like the wisps of the clouds in the mists of the sepulchres and when i have no sanctity to instill and no jaws of fortitude to mollify i will then become as it were to be and in this i will call thyself me.


i'm convinced


that you


fucked me


real good

you did


Name»Cynthia Karina[.]
Nick»Cyn, Cindy, C.K., trouble [-.+]
AIM»hotbunny03
Status»whatever it is[.] Loves»beaches, guitars, surfing,

Hates» closed minds, golf, sports in general,
assholes, meatheads,
jocks, preps,
bitches, "drama"[.]

Music»emocore, punk rock for the lamers, death metal, industrial[.]

WEEKEND PLANS

1. AFI concert.


Soundtrack of My Life
Flaw//My Letter
Smile Empty Soul//Bottom of a Bottle
Glassjaw//Radio Cambodia
Thursday//Where the Circle Ends
Cold//Gone Away
AFI//Silver and Cold
Mudvayne//Everything and NOthing
Marilyn Manson//New Shit
Rob Zombie//Dragula
Incubus//Certain Shade of Green
Disturbed//Stupified
Counting Crows//Colorblind
Doves//Firesuite

Song To Own Me With: AFI//The Leaving Song


Walked away
Heard them say
"Poison Hearts Will Never Change. Walk away again."
Turned away in disgrace
Felt the chill upon my face cooling from within.
It's hard to notice gleaming from the sky when you're staring at the cracks.
It's hard to notice what is passing by with eyes lowered.
You walked away, heard them say,
"Poisoned hearts will never change. Walk away again."
All the crakcs will lead right to me and alll the cracks will crawl right through me, and I fell apart..
as I walked away, heard them say,
"Poisoned Hearts Will Never Change." Walked away again.
Turned away in disgrace. Felt the chill upon my face cooling from within.
s.k.i.n. [so]kill[ignominy]now
YOUWANTMORE
[ website | BEQ ]

[9.12.03»01:57pm]
« mood | exanimate »
« music | O.O.D. .:. Polly's a Slut »

hey trenton, suck my imaginary balls k?
k thx jerkass.

crying.
i'm sad...for some reason...and this song is in my head [9.12.03»10:58am]
Staind://SO FAR AWAY

This is my life,
its not what i was before,
all these feeligns i've shared
and these are my dreams
that i'd never lived before
somebody shake me
cuz i
i must be dreaming

NOW THAT WE'RE HERE
ITS SO FAR AWAY
ALL THE STRUGGLES WE THOUGHT WAS IN VAIN
ALL IN THE MISTAKES
ONE LIFE CONTAINED
THEY ALL FINALLY START TO GO AWAY
NOW THAT WE'RE HERE ITS SO FAR AWAY
AND I FEEL LIKE I CAN FACE THE DAY
I CAN FORGIVE
AND I'M NOT ASHAMED TO BE THE PERSON THAT I AM TODAY

These are my words
that i've never said before
i think i'm doing okay
and this is the smile
that i've ever shown before
somebody shake me cuz
i must be sleeping

CHORUS

I'm so afriad of waking
please don't shake me
afraid of waking
please dont shake me

blablablabla....someone cheer me up...
crying.
[9.12.03»10:01am]
Who do you despise more--Osama or Suddam?
2 fell down on their knees, crying.
a quick update [9.11.03»03:37pm]
mk so i'm in computer lab...great fun...thanks eddie bear for some great talks last night, that was definitely cool..i'll post more later. <333
crying.
[9.10.03»01:34pm]
When the Battle begins,
there's no telling what'll happen...
you must compete.

WIN AN ICON, LAYOUT, or BANNER



GET A CLUE--

Taken PBs )
Wanted PBs )
crying.
hola [9.9.03»04:43pm]
« mood | aggravated »
« music | Prodigy - Smack my Bitch Up »

mk...so I always find out who my friends are when they're not being my friends...isn't that just great? So brads a homo...he doesn't talk to me, then he gives me all sorts of attitude when I fucking try to talk to him...whatever Brad, fuck you and your little groupie buddies too...Anyways...Yea and then Eddy--okay wtf...like I im him and then he always just signs off without a goodbye whatever--thanks for being so courteous sweetheart..god damn..I think everyone on the planet is fucking wrong right now...Does anyone have manners? God damn you people who im me then sign off, and god damn you people who are fucking talking to me and then sign off wtf...am I supposed to be nice when you im me later and ask whats wrong when you just fucking left me in the middle of the conversation--and once in a while--ok whatever..but every god damn time...What? Does it make you cooler to just leave? Does it make you happier to just blow someone off? Well listen to me fuckers, I hate it, I consider it completely ignorant and unethical. If you have feelings and manners, you will consider someone else the next time you try and fucking ignore them..I don't ever say anythign because I am the nicest kid sometimes, but you just piss me off and I will go Irish on your ass. tempers<3 mk That's all I'm going to post for now, I'll post later when I'm calm.
@#$@!CYN!W$#$%

crying.
i couldn't resist this one...lmfao [9.5.03»11:19am]
If I were a [feminine] gay man... by 38886
Your name
Your Gay Man NameTerry
Your Gay Man OccupationPoledancer at Local Gay Club
Your Stereotypical Gay Man TraitSquealing
Your Gay Man Music of ChoiceCeline Dion
Your Gay Man Cause of DeathChased down by Catholic mob
Created with quill18's MemeGen!
oh god poles >.
crying.
lmfao YAY BRITNEY [9.5.03»11:18am]
Edit Account Settings - Most Popular Users - Most Popular Memes - List My Memes - Help me!
NOTE: This site is still in testing and may experience downtime.
Threesome Fun by Mckennat
Username
Favorite Color
Date of Threesome October 5, 2007
Location of Threesome in the shower
First Partner Britney Spears
Second Partner Dr Dre

Created with quill18's MemeGen!

To add this to your blog, copy and paste the following:
Threesome Fun by Mckennat
Username
Favorite Color
Date of ThreesomeOctober 5, 2007
Location of Threesomein the shower
First PartnerBritney Spears
Second PartnerDr Dre
Created with quill18's MemeGen!

gimme that black pen0r lmfao
crying.
surveys and retardnation [9.5.03»11:16am]
SimAlTech.com
Simply your Web Experience
Design / Hosting / Programming
www.simaltech.com

LOOK AT ME
I am advertising
Click me you fools
rumandmonkey.com

Northern Ontario Dot Org
It's a great place to be!
Community and Tourism Info
www.northernontario.org

Rum and Monkey
Memes, tests, humor.
Click me, yo.
rumandmonkey.com

Advertise Here

Edit Account Settings - Most Popular Users - Most Popular Memes - List My Memes - Help me!
NOTE: This site is still in testing and may experience downtime.
what do they really think of you by purple
lj name
sex
age
your best friend thinks you look like a cows arse
your family think you're an alien
strangers think they wouldn't wanna cross you

Created with quill18's MemeGen!

To add this to your blog, copy and paste the following:
what do they really think of you by purple
lj name
sex
age
your best friend thinksyou look like a cows arse
your family thinkyou're an alien
strangers thinkthey wouldn't wanna cross you
Created with quill18's MemeGen!
crying.
thank you kai [9.5.03»10:57am]

Bill Gates
Circle I Limbo

Sluts
Circle II Whirling in a Dark & Stormy Wind

Militant Vegans
Circle III Mud, Rain, Cold, Hail & Snow

DMV Employees
Circle IV Rolling Weights

Dickheads
Circle V Stuck in Mud, Mangled

River Styx

Players
Circle VI Buried for Eternity

River Phlegyas

Uday Hussein, Qusay Hussein
Circle VII Burning Sands

Osama bin Laden
Circle IIX Immersed in Excrement

Saddam Hussein
Circle IX Frozen in Ice

Design your own hell

crying.
hola [9.5.03»10:08am]
« mood | hungry »
« music | Creed//Weathered »

que pasa mi compadres? como esta ustedes? lmfao...yes well I am not spanish, nor am I trying to be, I just think its fun--Anyway....I'm beginning to feel like someone hates me. My life is going downhill--i have no cell phone, my car broke down this morning ON THE HIGHWAY IN THE MIDDLE OF TRAFFIC, i've missed like 5 classes straight in a row of all my classes at UCF, which is really bad, because I have no idea what assignments I'm missin gbecause I cna't log in to WEBct...which is the online way to get yoru notes and crap for your classes--so i'm screwed...and I basically hate life right now...its getting more and more complicated--almost to the point where I don't want to go anywhere--my best friend katie [irl] has been ditching me for her bf, which I completely understand but its every god damn day, every god damn time we plan something-she bails...its so annoying...and like okay...I wouldn't be mad if it wasn't for the fact that she always lies to me--oh cyn we'll do something, lets do something tonight--and then she's nowhere to be found...and megan has her little boyfriend too, which sucks, but at least I get to hang out with her during the day to go to classes and the beach since she likes to go...I'm still feeling detached from them both though...this cool kid devon and marissa, I'm going out with them tonight, they're pretty awesome...we're going to meet up with Tim and Adam and Squeaks to do some skateboarding and go to this local concert venue--kinda awesome...anyway...so thats where I'll be...in other news--- EDDY BEAR--you're awesome and I'm so glad that we are talking more now, and I'm so glad that you're around more, andddddddddddddddddd I can't wait to talk to you sometime in the future...you're my SPECIAL friend ;x hehe....anywayz....yea...i'm gonna post with a new icon that I made...so yes, I make icons now lala wonderful eh?

IM HUNGRY...MAKE ME FOOD SOMEONE
<3 cyn

1 fell down on their knees, crying.
hi -waves- [8.29.03»10:23am]
« mood | anxious »
« music | Blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh »

So.....i'm here at college--morning classes got canceled, and guess what--I got up early and everything, I slept on the floor because my friend was being an ass about the bed..andddddddddd i'm trying to stay awake...joy joy joy joy...mmk soooooo i figured out it was just my first class that got canceled, so now I missed my 2nd class -.+ GOD STOP SCREWING WITH ME!!!! --raises fist and shakes--...k now everyone thinks i'm crazy.........lol jk..okay.....so it's official, i'm going to this party tonight, and there are going to be some serious hotties there. First of all, its a fraternity party, which as you know has all of the hottest guys in school, craziest whatever--but I hope that this guy in my sociology class will be there--because he is really cute and sweet--we talked yesterday after class and then we ate together--he was telling me about his fraternity thing and I was like oh awesome, and he wants me to come, bring friends, I was like nice advertising..he's like nah, I just want to know who a beautiful girl like you's friends are..and I shake my head and say lineeeeeeeeeeee -laugh- anyway....but yea me and my friend are gonna go now, cuz our other friends about to be out of class, so I will talk to you all later
-=|cyn|=-

crying.
hola que pasa [8.27.03»06:19pm]
« mood | depressed »
« music | Good for You - 3eb »

yes well....ok...i've been told about 3 timesthat i'm crazy and that its all going to catch up to me one day and i'm going to get into a lot of shit for it, jst because I like to have fun, and I know sometimes I can be a little reckless...Yea, I made josh feel like shit the other day, and I feel bad about that, but its just so not even worth it anymore. I'm tired of getting put down and crap, so I cut him off,nd i jus wanted to say hi to eddy <333 allo sexy hubby of mine ;]
mmk i'm outtttttttt


crying.
mmmm [8.25.03»06:52pm]
« mood | amused »
« music | Smile Empty Soul - Bottom of a Bottle »

First day of college was fucking awesome! Dude..so mny fucking guys everywhere, I was like damn I am single right? lol...hell fucking yea...anyways...3 of the 4 classes that I have..have more than 200 people in them...So thats a little disappointing...my anthropology teacher looks and talks likke Elmer Fudd, its so annoying. Seeing as I went out at like 2 las night, and didnt gethome until 6, I was sleeping in his class. I was like NOOO stay awake, and then the guy next to me was too hot...ok GIRLS--CURLY BLOND HAIR, CRYSTAL GREEN EYES, TAN, SURFER LOOK, AND HIS VOICE WAS SO HOT--yes...his name is Haddy, isn' that a tight ass name? So, we talked in class, and then he followed me out and I had to explain my name...so I was like its Cyn, but you can call me cynthia...and he was like well I'm Haddy, and I was like hey that's an awesome name...he's from Ocala, FL, and he hasn't been around much so theres some potential for a date cuz he was like what's there to do, and I was telling him the cool stuff about orlando -.-..cuz theres not that much to do here unless you've got money to blow on disney, but I told him abut this sports bar that we all go to and he was like, o well i gotta check that out...and I was all mmmmmhhhhhmmm -big smile-...so then me and megan chilled and met up with Stephanie...and then old Mike Heaney came around -.-. Basically he's an old crush from the catholic days that never went away ;/ so that blows...but yea....we talked, and he seemed to be having a good summer. We're all going to the beach on Wednesday, so that's fucking awesome...Yea..I don't know anything else except for this song by S.E.S. - bottom of the bottle is incredible...I completely understand it, it explains me completely...party hard, question later....yea..weird life ;/ alright, thanks megan for commentin ;] mmmk bye bye friends
<333 cyn

2 fell down on their knees, crying.
hiiiii [8.23.03»05:45pm]
« mood | happy »
« music | Blur - Colorblind »

ok this is my new layout....anyways....so....here it is...its a little self-whatever...but I dont know..ppl always want pix, this saves me time ;/, you know...anyways...I promise that I am going to start being more active starting now...I'm serious, I'm going to tell you guys everything, comment in everything, and whatever...anyway....I would just like to say that this could not have been made possible without brad and his remote loading site. Well...what has been up with Cyn...I start school on Monday...COLLEGE...OMG...parties, harder classes, parties...did i say parties? Well I can't party too much, I have a scholarship that I can't lose that's paying for my classes as well as apartment, so I'm screwed unless I pay attention. In other news, me and Josh are over....Brian is back in the picture...andddddddddddd Chris is somewhere out in left field....way out in left field....in real life romance blows so bad...I wish I could just have eddy around sometimes ;]...ok so its wishful thinking...Katie, my irl best friend, and I are going up to NYC for this christmas break, kind of a treat for both of us getting into college and doing well, if we do well, which i'm sure we will. I dont know, its a lot to plan, but I really awnt to go and ice skate, and brian said he would go with me if he could get off work, so that's awesome--because me and brian have the best times together....okay...well... I dont know...Yes...well comment and let me know what you think of the layout and any other tidbits you might have!
<3 cyn
1 fell down on their knees, crying.
bleh [8.8.03»03:39pm]
« mood | sad »
« music | Suffocate - Cold »

i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry to you, and you know who you are...i can't help the way i am, i just can't trust everyone and love them, it takes a lot for me to trustand it takes a lot more for me to love people...please dont be angry...i'm sorry
<3 cyn

1 fell down on their knees, crying.
well [8.7.03»06:12pm]
my fingers run through your hair and it reminds me of what i'll never have,
my eyes search the lines of your face and it shows me the future of my tears,
my voice sings to the eyelids of your closed hues and it tells me the adoration i'll never see,
my lips kiss the fears away from your mind but you still quiver and drown in your nightmares.

by cyn
crying.
well [8.7.03»06:12pm]
« mood | sad »
« music | forgive me - evanescence »

my fingers run through your hair and it reminds me of what i'll never have,
my eyes search the lines of your face and it shows me the future of my tears,
my voice sings to the eyelids of your closed hues and it tells me the adoration i'll never see,
my lips kiss the fears away from your mind but you still quiver and drown in your nightmares.

by cyn

crying.
... [8.6.03»09:33pm]
« mood | crushed »
« music | Gone Away - Cold »

How Much for the Pain?

Can you dream like I dream,
of paradises far away,
where we can escape,
cheating the hold of fate,
believing only in the chase,
of somewhere beyond this place,
Where we can be lost in our own reality.

Can you rule like I rule,
of kingdoms made of hearts,
where your beauty is the art,
captured by everything you are,
feeling always my missing part,
finding it forever in that one little star,
Where I could live forever with you.

Can you lose as I lost,
of paradises that were so near,
dreams that I used to hear,
kingdoms that crumbled from fear,
stars, escapes, and nights I held so dear,
forevers, always, nevers, and onlies and all my tears,
Where they end is worth your cost.

crying.
sup [8.5.03»11:01pm]
« mood | crushed »
« music | Jack Johnson - Holes to Heaven »

I know I've been away for a long time....ya..a lot of stuff has happened....I've been going to the beach..and i got a sweet job as a server at Olive Garden, very "high volume"..but the manager--Brian is very cute and nice...very young for a manager...yea but ...yea...i'm cool ;] i'm straight without any relationships now...my mind has been like hell sometimes lately trying to figure things out in my head...about how i feel about certain people....certain issues...my grandfather and his operation...he has colon cancer..and he had surgery and then my moms cousin got hit by a drunk driver when he was working---and died...the funerals early tomorrow mornin...thats why i'm home tonight....but yea...i feel so bad about the admired_layouts, guys ;/..i think i'm going to have to withdraw my participation in that because I just can't keep up...when i get some more time, well i dont know...I think I will make backgrounds for people but codes and things like that....I dont have time for...anyways... I got to get going.
<3 muah <3
cyn

crying.
Cyn » 20 entries back
yesterday » who cares