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Thursday, September 4th, 2003
12:29 pm - goddamn hippos!
so here i am, again. i think im sleepy but i cant tell..all day long ive been in this weird state of being. i feel like im high. its very weird. and i was having these strange dreams about girls having the same tattoo as me(the one on the back of my neck) but in different places like on their lower back and on the back of their heads. but they were evil and they were talking but i couldnt understand them at all. weird. i feel like im going to throw up all over this fucking computer. my insides feel as if they are rolling around and mixing together and my right hand will not stop shaking...i dont mean like alittle bit of shaking, i mean i cannot even hold a pop can to my mouth without spilling pop all over me! really, what the fuck is going on with me?! its taken me soooo long to even type this much! this is crazy...
maybe im dying
other than all of the shit above, im having a not so bad day! i washed nates car for him, because i love him! at the car wash there were these two guys watching me the whole fucking time....it was kinda crazy. but i did things to let them know that i knew they were watching me! silly, i know!
oh oh oh! i took my car in on tuesday because, ok get this, im in my car trying to hook up my green neon and im smelling this weird smell, like old food or a dead body or something...so im looking in my car for the smell..i get to the trunk and i open it and it hits me..i could have threw up! anyways my whole trunk was wet..i mean soaked! the spare wheel well is all rusted and filled with water, because the stupid fuckers that fixed(or so they said) it didnt do what they had to do. i think ive found 15 or 20 things that are still wrong with my fuckin car...thats bull shit! but anyways i made a list in huge letters and in red so maybe they could read it..i explaned everything in detail that they didnt fix or that they did wrong! they better get it right this time.. when i go to get the car in about 6 months or however long it will take them to fix it again...im going to sit in the parking lot and go over everything and even if there is one little thing wrong with it im going to give it back to them and im going to tell them what i think of them!! im pissed! beu townsin and safe auto suck my cock!!!!!(sigh)
on a lighter note, nate and i got to hang out with joshie last night. we all went to the wal*mart super center way out in some place that i dont remember! nate and i got car models...umm and then we went to JIMS to get some doughnuts. we got home and nate and i worked on our models without a word for the next hour and a half! nate got his done but i had to finish mine this morning. im slow.
and i thought Finding Nemo came out today but it doesnt come out until november! what the fuck!? i went to toys r us and i asked this lady and she was going to beat my ass or something but she got pissed and said it didnt come out for two more months! people, i swear! my sister said it was a good movie. fun fact***its the first disney movie that has a deformed person in it!*** sweet! nate calls it slimey me-mo! heheh thats so funny!
ah and work, works good. but i think im getting fat because im not doing anything..i went from getting my ass kicked everyday at work and busting my balls to make a dollar.... to sitting in a chair in my underwear and getting naked and i make awhole lot more than i did killing myself! maybe ill just start going to the ymca again! good idea.
so i guess ashley and krusty are ok, they didnt die(or so krustys mom thought!) they just went out of town!
im going to go to my cougar sites to make myself feel bad about not doing anything to my car!
later~
one more for the road! fun fact***Hippopotamuses have killed more people in Africa than all the lions, elephants, and water buffalo combined, usually by trampling.***
goddamn those hippos!

current mood: high
current music: steely dan- do it again

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Tuesday, September 2nd, 2003
3:17 pm - and the flowers bloomed like maddness in the spring
today wasnt what i thought it would be. i did everything on my list and just about nothing worked out. the house that i was ranting about was sold..it had been sold for like a month and a half!! why have it in the paper?! some people, i swear. anyways, turned in the film, lots of pictures of trevor and me. thanks joshie! and i got my hair cut. i went to get my hair cut not knowing that my name was listed under valentine! they thought i was crazy.
and ever since ive came back from wal*mart all ive been doing is looking up pictures of johnny depp! whats that about??!! today is was too crazy for me to even continue to talk about. so im done bye

current mood: uncomfortable
current music: jethro tull-locomotive breathe

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10:15 am - what a fool belives
(sigh) good morning. just alittle sleepy still so forgive my poor ramble!
'why are you up now?' you might ask...well i have sooo much to do today so i have to be up and ready to go.
(one) i have to wait until 10:30 to take some film into joshie
(two) i have to get my mop cut today!
(three) i might as well dye it too
(four) i have to travel to far away lands, ok well not so far away lands, im going to go to nates dads to get a newspaper clipping.
nate and i found a beautiful house! and its in our price range!!! ok its in huber and its right next to the old Denny's. it is a two story house, fenced back yard, shead, coverd back porch, two car garage. we havent seen the middle yet but heres what im thinking it has...atleast 2 bedrooms, atleast a bath and a half, maybe a basement, and all the other shit that comes with a house! so im super excited! and we can afford it! plus nates dad is going to help us on the down payment! swwwweeeeeettttt! anyways im going to get the clipping from nates dads because i left it over there. it has the phone number on it. im going to call there today and see about getting to go inside the house! exciting!
i guess everything else today dosent even matter..like i have to take my fuckin car in again! ummm i need to clean, maybe play my bass, play on the computer, dumb shit!
oh and i have to find out if ashley and krusty are dead...no one has heard from them since thursday...krustys mom is fuckin calling the house like everyday, like were going to hide ash and krusty at our house or something! wtf!
anyways..last night was fun. joshie came over and we hung out..he had new seen house of 1000 deadies(hehe) so we watched it..i dont know if he liked it or not but he still watched it! and i got ghoulies(ASHLEY: it was that scary movie we watched when we were younger, with the scary green guy, the cat, rat and the fat scary thing that slides on the ground..they were at the circus killing people!)
anyways, we watched that too..
ummm what else? i dont know!
im going to go to wal*mart now! bye bye

current mood: energetic
current music: pretty girls make graves- the getaway

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Saturday, August 30th, 2003
8:58 pm - slimey memo!
weeee! i just got back from auburn indiana, that huge car show or whatever..it was fuckin sweet for afew reasons. (one) i got to hang out with nate, his dad and his uncle terry all fuckin day. (two) i got to see like 5 gtos(motherfuckin sweet) and diablos, mustangs..sweet cars! (three) i got to see the car they used in gone in 60 seconds!!! nic cage touched it!!!! wee! (four) there was like 4 new moded cars and one of which just so happened to be a cougar! ok so it wasnt that sweet but it was cool enough to take about 5 pictures of! (five) in the middle of my rant and rave about the cougar my brother in laws best friend walks up!! it was sweet! and thats about all the sweetness i could squeeze out of the day....ok now on to the things that sucked!! (one)we had to park like 5 miles away from the place. (two) it was like 198 outside! (three) i got fuckin sun burn. (four) nates dad and terry decided that it would be better for us to split up and walk around in a crowd of 1 million people, long story short, we(nate and i) end up waiting like 3 hours for them to show up! bitches! (five) we had to walk BACK to the car, 5 fuckin miles away!! (six) nate drooled on me on the way home!!!
so i guess it was ok.
lately ive been getting sick...its really weird. i feel like i have a temp of 100 and i get all cold and shit...an hour later, im fuckin doing jumping jacks! weird i know!
fun fact***The name Marcia is from the Latin for “warlike.”***
what the fuck is that about?!?

current mood: sore
current music: jethro tull- locomotive breathe

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Friday, August 29th, 2003
11:55 am - moisturizing body lotion
so here i am again...its like all my weeks are the same..i see the same people and do the same things!!! it sucks!! i really cant wait to move then maybe i can have something to do when everyone i know is at work..
i guess im just board...
nate went to see reggie last night..i was kinda sad i couldnt go..i love reggie! i didnt even know ash and krusty liked reggie until afew weeks ago! oh well i got a shirt! weee!
i think i need to drink or something...its like im really depressed all the time! i have nothing to be depressed about..i mean, i have my own apartment, i have a great job, i have a easy life(now) and i have nate...i coulndt ask for more. but sometimes i feel i piss nate off and i dont want to push him away! :( i feel bad because im so grumpy all the fuckin time and i know he hates it...ill fix it. i miss him right now. i think i just worry too much!
let me recap on what i was say the other day...i really want to have a baby now! im like really excited about it!
i belive that nate and i could have a baby right now and have no problems what so ever! and another reason i would like to have a baby soon is because i dont wont our child to be too far away from corrine..because corrine is the only baby jess is going to have and nate has no brothers or sisters. so corrine will be our babys only cousin! which is pretty sad but thats ok. but im really excited.
all i know is that when im really to have a baby im going to have to leave work! so ill have to find a new job :( i dont think i could be a mom and a stripper, thats kinda weird! but ill find something..ill work at a gas station or something! i cant wait!
fun fact***A 3-week-old embryo is no larger than a sesame seed. A 1-month-old fetus’s body is no heavier than an envelope and a sheet of paper. Its hand is no larger than a teardrop.***
i guess im upsessed!

current mood: indescribable
current music: lil flip-this is the way we ball

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Thursday, August 28th, 2003
10:23 am - i dont need no introduction and shit
so im awake now...grrrr...im not sleepy but it feels soo good to sleep! im just lazy.
last night nate and i went and got food. i made chicken tacos. they were ok, they could have been better. ok i quit eating red meat about a month ago and everything is going good but im running out of things to make nate for dinner so im going back to my old ways. it will be ok. i mean, ill be just fine.
last night we got movies from block buster. i got a movie called GACEY, its about john wayne gacey. it was so scary. i like movies that are based on true stories...they are just scary. and nate got a movie called, SAVING SILVERMEN. it looked good because its about neil diamond(and nate loves neil) and jack black is in it and stufff, but the shit wasnt funny. i mean it could have been soo much better. we didnt even watch it all..i just wanted to go to sleep because i didnt like the movie. i didnt even laugh at one thing! but nate liked it so thats all that matters.
so something has been bugging me lately..when nate and i were hanging out with my sis and justin my sis was talking about how shes on meds now. well all her life she has had really bad moodswings. like one second shell be great, easy to talk to, nice and the next second shell just go off and get pissed about nothing! and this runs in my family...well the last month or too ive been really weird like going off on nate all the time or just freaking out. its never been as bad at jess but i dont want it to get that bad. i mean i dont mind it but i know it pisses nate off sometimes when i just get pissed about nothing. so i think im going to get on the same meds jess is on, not for me but for nate. i dont want him to hate me or anything. so im going to look into it today and see what i can do!
oh and im going to look for a new house today! i guess nate and i are going to move to huber heights which is fine with me. but ya busy day busy day!
so im going to go!
fun fact***The Sun isn't round. It is flattened on the top and the bottom.***

current mood: busy
current music: toto-africa

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Wednesday, August 27th, 2003
6:31 pm - back jack, do it again
so i have calmed down since this morning...but im still pissed.
work helped out alot...i made good money today..but still, im still mad. oh well.
i have no idea where nate is!! he comes home at 4pm and i get off at 6pm...hes not here and im freaking out...i dont know if hes at his dads or what but he hasnt called yet or came home...i guess i just get freaked out too quick. but im really posessive of him..because i love him tooooo much! ;)
anyways, ya work was great. it could have been better but it was good.
all day long ive been thinking about getting a new house and moving and shit...i get really excited about moving. i think its because ive moved around all my live and i think its a normal thing to move everyother year or so....i guess thats kinda weird. but ive always wanted my own house and nate and i are getting one after we get out of this shit hole and im sooo excited! just to have some place thats mine, i can do whatever i want to it...im so excited. and getting a house means im going to have kids soon! which is also exciting!!! weeee kids!
well im going to go nates here! weee
fun fact
***i love nate***

current mood: aggravated
current music: nate- pissing into the potty

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8:30 am - i fuckin hate trotwood!!!
Trotwood Ohio is the biggest shithole ive ever seen, let alone ever lived in! everyday its something new around here. if its not the neighbors upstairs fucking at 3am, its them playing their stupid music so loud i cant even think. and if its not the fucking neighbors upstairs, its the fucking kids from the next apartments over! something always happens! i dont know how many times the police have been to my apartment since we moved in 6 months ago!! thats crazy...and today they just might come back. last night while nate and i were sleeping, some stupid fuck thought,'hey im going to be a stupid fuck today and do some stupid fuckin shit!' and they hit the drivers side back wheel well on nates car! didnt leave a note saying im sorry, didnt bother to come and knock on our door(everyone knows where we live because we are the only fuckin white people here!!!!) ok come on now...if your going to be a stupid fuck, do it some place else...because there is only one fuckin white car that parks in our lot every night! so guess what stupid fucker, you better have a pretty good story because when you get your fat black ass home from work or wellfair or whatever the fuck you do all day long( i surely dont think anyone around here works)there is going to be a nice big fat police car waiting for you!!! you dumb fuck!
ok the damage isnt bad at all, its a dent the size of my foot and about 5inches tall...with lots and lots of white paint...the fact is if you dont have the brains or the balls to tell someone THAT LIVES IN YOUR COMPLEX that you hit their car, your pretty fucking dumb! im beginning to think that the color of some peoples skin effects their judgement( yes, i said some people. not intended for one set of people. and not one kind of people..dont take that the wrong way)
long story short one more time....TROTWOOD OHIO FUCKIN SUCKS
and if i owned a gun i would have been in jail 6 months ago!
the next place i move too will not be mixed! i want a full WHITE town!! fuck everyone that cant handle that!
fun fact***the next motherfucker that even so much talks to me or nate or looks at us weird is going to have my size 11 foot in their asshole and my fist in their mouth!!!***
fuck this, i have to go to work

current mood: pissed the fuck off!!!
current music: genesis-jesus he knows me

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Tuesday, August 26th, 2003
8:53 am - ball state?
so i havent wrote on here for along time because i have been away...on sat. i went to chicago(well close to chicago) to see my family. it was ok, i took nate with me. this is the first time hes been up there in like 2 years! anyways, we went up there to my sis's house. and from then on things got weird. jess(my sis), justin(my bro in law), me and nate all hung out for afew hours..these hours included: me playing with corrine and giving her lots of gifts, justin talking my head off about music, nate telling me he was hungry every two mintues, watching the first half of House of 1000 corpses(which was soooo good i had to search for 5 hours trying to find it!) and then having my mom over. well she didnt know that i was comming up that weekend so im sure you know how excited she was...and drunk. you see my mom has drank her whole life(likewise with my father) inturn putting my family(me&my sis) through hell our whole lifes..when worse came to worse my mom stopped drinking because by that time she had nothing. jess left, i left and she was alone. she tried to stop drinking but it didnt work...so my moms all drunk and being weird and pissing me off. then nate and i have to drive 2 more hours with her in the car. all she did the whole time was ramble on about nothing! we get to my g-mas and things are better. my mom and g-ma leave to go to gamble and nate and i go to zachs to see the baby...(sigh)
long story short...the trip was ok.
and now im here at ball state with ashies for school...were having fun! maybe we can get drunk tonight!
anyways i got to go!
fun fact
***the ball state library looks like a stack of books from above...(weird)***

current mood: grateful
current music: the workers in the library- makin too much damn noise!!!!!!!

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Thursday, August 21st, 2003
10:02 am - 'i am in love with a mc donalds girl'
im really excited today. ashley is moving down here tomorrow! weeeee!
ok so i saw freddy vs. jason and i must say, i didnt really like it. ok i really love horror movies but i really dont like action movies like that jap guy, jackie chan or whatever, i just dont like those movies! well freddy vs. jason is more action than horror! im not going to give anthing away but i belive if a movie took ten years just to write the fucking script, the shit should be great and not just, oh well i guess i liked it, but ill never watch it again! its just said. and if there are people out there who do like it, well then thats cool. everyone has their own opinion and that was mine! ;)
whatelse....ummm, ok this one goes out to all the ladies...if you ever even think about getting fake nails, bring this journal entry up and read it again! :) ok so i got fake nails about a month ago for my job. all the other girls had them and they all looked nice and pretty, so im like what the hell i went and got me some put on(oh and i did go to a nail place and they did it, i didnt do it myself) anyways yesterday im talking to some guy(you know how it is) and i hit my left hands thumb nail on the door way! talk about pain. that hurts so bad. ok so now i have a huge chip out of the left side of my thumb 15 mins later i chip it again this time i created a sharp point with which i proceeded to stab the other girls with! by this time im pretty pissed, but luckly i only had maybe an hour to go at work. so i race home and find something with a flat end and for the next hour i sat in the bathroom and scraped my nails off. it hurt so bad. let me put it this way my real nails are now very very thin(because the fake nails peeled the top layers of my real nails off) and my nails are very sore. kinda like when you cut or bite your nails waaaaay too short and they bleed and shit...well just think of that happening to the middle of your nail! thats right my nails are bleeding from the middle, it hurts and its very sick looking. if i had a webcam right now, everyone would be in trouble! looong story short dont get fake nails unless you like nail pain!
ok then, ummm ya. i think im done!
fun fact
***According to one source, Americans buy about 5 million things that are shaped like Mickey Mouse, or have a picture of Mickey Mouse on them, in the course of one day.***
i dont like mickey mouse! my fucking dog looks like mickey mouse when his ears or back. maybe they read my journal and put that down on the count!! i mean, i did have to buy trevor!
good day-

current mood: giggly
current music: weird al- mc donalds girl

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Tuesday, August 19th, 2003
4:00 pm - oh i almost forgot something
what about a fun fact for the kiddies!

***Emerson Moser, who was Crayola's senior crayon maker, revealed upon his retirement that he was blue-green colorblind and couldn't see all the colors. He molded more than 1.4 billion crayons in his 37-year career.***

isnt that somethin!
i just got done washing my car...what a beautiful car it is. (sigh) soon i will have to take him back to the 'doctor' so they can fix him right this time! in the meantime im lookin to buy him some extra parts!
well i gotta go..nates going to be home and im going to cook him some dinner! then its off to see freddy VS. jason!!! weee!

heres yet another fun fact:
***Undertakers report that human bodies do not deteriorate as quickly as they used to. The reason, they believe, is that the modern diet contains so many preservatives that these chemicals tend to prevent the body from decomposition too rapidly after death.***
thats even better than the last one!

current mood: accomplished
current music: til tuesday- voices carry

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11:37 am - what a day
yesterday was great. nate and i both had the day off so we did lots of fun stuff. first we went to the columbus mall, which is in columbus! anyways for you that dont know, its like an hour and 45mins drive there. but it was well worth it. we stayed there for about 2 and half hours..between the two of us we got 4 computer games. lets take some time out to talk about these games shall we...oh but first..i also got a pimped out toy celica and nate got a supra.
i got: Wizardry8 and Disciples II servants of the dark...and nate and i got: Total Annihilation; Kingdoms.
Nate got: Disciples II guardians of the light
ok my game wizardy8 is so sweet. you get 6 people(well you can make them be cats or lizards or elves,etc.) and you get to pick what them people do for a living like, one guy of mine is a ninja and another is a chemist of sorts. you can also pick their personalitys and what their voices sound like. you get to pick what they are skilled in like lockpicking or hand to hand combat. words cannot describe this game! it is great! i couldnt stop playing it last night. the main thing in the game is your on a space ship and is crashes on an island and you have to find your way to safety but fighting monster. everytime you fight and kill a monster you get more points inturn leveling up so to speak. you get better at the things you are already good at. wizardry8 gets two thumbs up from me. great game.
oh now on to disciples II servants of the dark...i installed to game and it came without a manual...no walk through...no controller guide..its really hard to play a game if you dont know what your doing! havent even looked it up on google to see if i can get some help. dont worry i havent gave up on this game..it looks fucking sweet!
as far as nates games go i dont know if he likes them or not..oh well
then after going to the columbus mall we came home..joshy callede and wanted to hang out..so he comes over and what do we do? we go to the dayton mall! well first we went to sound waves to get nate headlights! then we went to the mall where i proceeded to spend the rest of my money on outfits. i went to the first mall with $302 and i left the last mall with $35! but thats ok! i got sooo many outfits. i had to drag nate and josh into old navy with me from there i got a pair of cute pants that can turn into spants(shorts&pants) and i got 5 shirts..all the same kind of shirts but different colors..they are really cute. that was about $75. then we went to pac sun and i got an independant shirt and a shorties hoodie..the fuckin hoodie was $45. so again i spent $60. then we left the mall and we went to toys r us. where i bought nate a toy and me a acura rsx-s, its bad ass! and both together were like $30! so i was done but no more shopping comming. we had to go get dinner. we went to the store and got chicken patties and some pop and shit and i spent $10.. long day! but super fun!
and tomorrow me, nate, and krusty are going to see that jason and freddy movie!! im excited!
oh oh ooooh! and ashley is moving down this weekend!!!!!!! im sooooo excited!

current mood: hyper
current music: moody blues-nights in white satin

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Sunday, August 17th, 2003
9:03 pm - i like the way she shake it in her thong!
ho-hum! im at loss for words today...
yesterday i got to hang out with jared! it was sweet. he came home from school so nate and i went over to his house. we swam and then we grilled chicken..what a nice boy jared is. we all were going to go to a random strip club(because its fun) but funds were low. now i wont see jared until he comes back from school again :(
work was good. today it was just me and another girl so we got lots of money!! who would have ever thought a stripp club would be busy on a sunday! but i dont have to go back until weds!! weee! now i can spend all the money i made! im thinking about getting something for my car!
i just watched BLOW for the second time! its good and jonny depp is fuckin hot!
ok fun fact time:
***"Formication" is a hallucination that bugs or snakes are crawling on or under the skin, and is common to amphetamine and cocaine users. This hallucination is also referred to as "crank bugs."***

crazy, i know! ;)

current mood: content

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Friday, August 15th, 2003
3:30 pm - shitloads of turkey!
from now on i plan on posting fun facts i find on the net!
***Americans consume more than 353 million pounds of turkey during National Turkey Lovers' Month in June. By comparison, more than 675 million pounds of turkey will be consumed at Thanksgiving.***
thats alot of motherfuckin turkey ya'll!

current mood: hungry
current music: lil flip- this is the way we ball

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12:11 pm - another day, another dollar
last night at the club, things didnt work out like we(myself and the other strippers) had planned...we had about 40 customers come in last night. it sucked!! at the start of the shift the dancers have to pay their 'booth rent' of $25. well last night i made about $45..so thats only $20 over boothrent! by far the worst night ive ever had there. i dont think ive ever came home with less than $200. all because of that huge power outage..everyone thought: its going to come to dayton, were going to be in the dark, we cant go outside tonight..no naked chicks for us!!
all that for nothing..i wish the lights would have went out..
i guess it all happened because a main power plant got hit by lighting..it was all over the us and even up north! oh ya i hope my northern buddy Matt didnt get hit!
and tonight i hope things are back to normal!
but its ok, ill more than make up for it tonight! ;) ill work my magic!
that was my little bitchfest! now im done.
all i can think about lately is my fucking car! i started talking to this guy i met on one of the cougar boards i go to...his name is Matt, hes really nice and sweet! and all weve been talking about the last 3 days are our cars! it wonderful! he is such a nice guy! and hes has the best car looking car ive ever seen in my life!! hopefully one day mine will look atleast half as sweet as Matts car!
~sigh~
i guess im going to go now...its 12noon and i havent even ate breakfast yet!

current mood: excited
current music: big timers- #1 stunna

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Thursday, August 14th, 2003
12:16 pm - alittle ditty
twice in one day! i must be some sort of machine!
there are just afew more things i wanted to talk about today.
one of which is: my left arm...ummm, i mean, my best friend ashley! thats right baby, im talkin about you! right now she lives about 3 hours away but in afew short weeks she'll be in the next town! 5 mins away from me! she will be moving out of her dads house to live with her boyfriend, rusty(aka: krusty) and i dont think anything else could make me happier! i know my life is always ten times better when shes around...i just hope shes as excited as i am!
next: i would like to take time out to talk about my dog! i know, its weird. but there is something bugging me about him. as you all might know, hes maybe 6months old and hes a mini greyhound...wel last night when i was getting settled in for bed, the little fucker wanted to play..so i played alittle and he gets a bug up his ass and starts biting me..and he doesnt stop until i have to bodyslam his little ass into the bed! i turely thought he would kill me if i hadnt stopped him! he was out for blood that was for sure! but when im all alone with him, hes fine and dandy. always has to be around me, alwyas has to sleep with me. i dont understand it! hes crazy, i know it!
ok enough bad talkin my dog(if he could read he would more than likely kill me in my sleep for writing this).
fun fact: when i flip his ears back, he looks like mickey mouse!!

current mood: bouncy
current music: genesis - misunderstanding

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11:02 am - this is my first time...be gentle
well, isnt this nice, a web journal! i never thought id get mixed up with one of these goddamn things but here i am typing away. weeee! the only thing i really know about these 'online journals' is that if someone reads something you wrote about them(or someones else they know for that matter) they will more than likely not understand the context and take it out of proportion. then riots and chaos will start all over the world! long story short, im going to be very careful about what i write in here because i myself was hurt very badly in an online journal. for all you fools that already know me, im sorry. and for all those that dont, im sorry!
good day-

current mood: anxious
current music: pretty girls make graves-the getaway

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