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Sunday, February 6th, 2011

    Time Event
    11:44a
    My friend...
    It looks like this is going to be it.

    I'm taking off from work tomorrow to head down to Stanford to see my friend. I would head down today...right this minute, but I can't. The thought of waiting with the possibility of missing the chance to say goodbye scares me a little, but I just can't do it right now. It sounds selfish (maybe...) but I need a day to prepare myself for this.

    I have no idea how I'm going to react tomorrow morning...but I do know that if I were to drive down there today, I'd be a wreck. I want to be at least somewhat composed. So I'm spending today with friends...talking things out, still trying to stay positive but realistic. Hopefully by the end of today, I'll at least have a better idea of how to handle this.
    11:54p
    No luck.
    I spent most of the evening sitting in a cafe, writing sub plans for work and desperately trying to figure out how I'm going to be able to handle saying goodbye to someone who is the closest thing I have to a sister tomorrow morning.

    Had a long conversation with my ex, A (of all people). She said something that gave me a little comfort at the time -- "Don't treat it like it's goodbye forever...it's just a visit."

    That's a hell of a lot easier said than done...but there is a point there.

    I don't know what tomorrow's going to look like. Hopefully clearer than tonight.

    I need to get some sleep. I've got a two hour drive in Bay Area rush hour traffic to deal with in a few hours.

    Current Mood: depressed

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