Ramblings that make more sense in my silly head.
sometimes I think I need to meet someone, one person, I truly hate, just so I can have somewhere to focus it all on. I wonder if I would really regret losing a friend,or developing a hatred for an acquaintance. Would it really be so bad? Well, I would probably think it was horrible, especially a good friend. I also have this habit or becoming friends with someone, then very easily forgetting their negative aspects (after all, they're my friend). So they would have to do something, many things, that are atrocious. It's hard for me to think of anything that would make me feel that way (sure, if you killed my parents, things would get pretty awkward.. but you were either crazy, had a reason, had a crazy reason?).
but sometimes I think it would be healthier, or at least simpler, if I could just focus that emotion and expel it onto one person with good reason.
Just now I wondered if it's not the lack of someone to hate that's my problem, but my way of doing so much to forgive or try to justify another's wrongdoings (even when directly against me). Maybe there are people I should hate, at the very least harbor a much stronger dislike towards, and I'm simply holding myself back. Does this result in me being a nicer person, or just being snippy and critical of everyone else's little mistakes and annoying habits and offensive viewpoints or actions? That emotion has to go somewhere, right?