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Lynnsay's Journal

23rd May, 2003. 11:38 pm. my last entry on blurty..

well i am sorry to say, but i have decided to go back to live journal. so if anyone wants to keep up on my everyday life, i will be on livejournal.com under lilmamma. hope all is well for everyone and i promise to keep up on your journals as well. xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

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27th April, 2003. 12:07 am. i cant believe this shit...

finally... felix decided to come home tonight. and had the nerve to tell me that not only did he stay the night with wifey last night, but he fucked her too. he is soooo lucky that my son was asleep when he got home, cause i wouldve got his shit all ready for him to go back to wifey. he has a very rude awakening in the morning. let me fucking tell ya.

Current mood: annoyed.

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26th April, 2003. 12:46 pm. this is it...

felix left with wifey and his daughter yesterday to go to the carnival. well he never came home last night or yet today, so you already know. once i am done with this post i am going to be a nice "bitch" and pack his shit for him. miguel had asked me to marry hiim the other day when i talked to him on the phone. and i wasnt quite sure of my decision, but now i think its a definate YES. thanks to felix for helping me make my mind up. i wish him all the best. but this is obviously what he wants or he wouldve brought his ass home last night. yea know.
anyway, i am gonna close for now. today is shitty outside, so i think its a jammie day. i love jammie days. talk to you later. buh bye..

Current mood: relieved.

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23rd April, 2003. 10:25 pm. just got back..

went with kara to home depot. oh my god. what a trip that was. i never thought it would be over. but it is. after that, we went to empire buffet and got something to eat. then made a quick stop a walmart and came home. got my little man all tucked in bed. now its time for me to lay it down. good night..

Current mood: exhausted.

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22nd April, 2003. 10:56 pm. i cant believe this shit...

miguel and i havent been getting along too well for the past couple days. today he barely talked to me when i dropped the baby off to him while i went to my interview. we got into bad over the phone earlier. then he called me up apologizing and crying for everything that has gone wrong. i told him to stop crying and it will all turn out for the best in the long run. and it was time to put dorian to bed, so i told miguel to call me back. he called me back alright.. from the police station. he was all upset and crying on the phone. i asked him what was going on and he told me that they picked him up because they messed up on his time. so he told me a little bit, then the officer came on the phone and explained the rest. i cant believe this shit. how are they gonna give the man his freedom, then take it away after a little more than a week. i dont understand. now he has to go back to jail and complete his time. which is another 15 months. his release date isnt until june of 2004. i do know that they better let me come see him this time. cause i cant go that much longer without seeing him. this is bullshit. i dont know what to do. i feel so shitty cause of the fact that we werent getting along. my head hurts from crying so hard. so i am about to take some tylenol and lay it down. i will update tomorrow. good night.. *tears*

Current mood: sad.

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22nd April, 2003. 5:43 pm. unfuckingreal...

today has beenquite stressful for me. kinda. first i got into an argument with miguel on the phone because i finally told him that i am not making felix leave. and that i have feelings for him (felix). he blew up on the phone and ended up hanging up on me. whatever.. then i got a call for an interview which i couldnt find a ride to until the last minute. it went okay. but when i got back home felix was getting ready to leave. i asked him where he was going. he said with corey, yet when i stopped here earlier he was on the phone with his ex. so i put two and two together. and i told him "dont fucking lie to me, i know you are going with her." but i didnt get too pissed off about it being i was with miguel the other day for easter. i asked felix if he was coming home tonight and he said later on. so now.. if i dont come home tonight, i know where he is and believe me ALL his shit will be packed and ready for him when he does come home. i am not going to play this game with miguel or felix. they can both kiss my fat ass. well for now. i am done bitching. i need to check on supper. talk to you later on.

Current mood: aggravated.

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20th April, 2003. 9:34 pm. happy easter...

today was okay. first my dad and i went to pick up miguel (my babys daddy), then everyone took a trip to my moms house to pick up my little sister. when we got back from there. me, dad, dorian and miguel went to my dads gf's house to eat. around 6pm we dropped miguel off at home and then came home ourselves. felix was waiting on the porch when i got here. i was quite surprised. he is actually being quite loveable today. talking about he missed me thats why he came home early. yeah okay...lol. anyway i made brownies and put dorian to bed. now i am about to pick up the livingroom and head to bed. have alot to do tomorrow. *sweet dreams*

Current mood: tired.

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19th April, 2003. 9:35 pm. blah blah blah...

nothing exciting has been going on my way. went to do laundry today. now i am so out of energy. right now i am waiting for bonnie to get here so we can bring dorian to stay the night with his daddy. my sister and kim wanted me to go to the complex with them tonight. but i am so fucking broke. it aint even funny. so i dont know what i will do tonight. felix is out with corey. i dont expect him back tonight. so.... i am HOME ALONE... yeah...

Current mood: blah.
Current music: nas - "i can".

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17th April, 2003. 10:35 am. its already started...

not even 4 days this man has been out of jail; and he is starting his bullshit already. last night he called and said he is going to get full custody of my son and that i am not a very good mom. good luck. they will laugh at him. asshole! then this morning he has the nerve to call me and ask if i can bring my son to see him. yeah right. he has made no attempt to come see him so why am i gonna go out of my way to take him there.
anyway. i am about to get in the shower and get ready for work. have a good day. :)

Current mood: amused.

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16th April, 2003. 3:51 pm. damnit..

well i ended up not going to work today. now i am sitting here waiting to get my little man from daycare. his parental unit wants me to drop him off for a little bit so he can spend time with him. he should have thought about that when he got out. instead of waiting 4 fucking days later. i dont know what to say. but one advantage of being home today is that felix is home too. finally. some quality time. if thats what you want to call it. until corey calls and says jump. then i am left all alone again til 6pm when its time to get my little man. anyway. i got a letter from my long lost friend george today. i miss him alot. but i dont understand that the only time i hear from him is when he is locked up. wtf! i am about to close out of here for now. and start walking cause i dont know where my dad is. talk to you all later.

Current mood: angry.

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