| 3:40p |
changes again
Well, things are changing again, he will be quitting his job within a week or 2 and/or as soon as they will let him go and now we will be opening 1-2 businesses for pools and dogs, I hope this works, because we are asking for a home equity loan to pay for all this, I don't know if we will get it, but we are asking, if not this will all go ona a credit card. I hope this works and works fast, because I am to the point where I don't care.
I was thinking also, about last night at dinner, again he harps on the girls and I think of how he compares the twins to the oldest and how that is not fair to the twins, i hate that, the harping alone gets on my nerves, but to compare thats just not right.
then also, about me and my makeup, i feel like a teenager because I won't put on makeup at home but while on my way to work, thats when I put it on, then I make sure I rub all of it off before I get home, how stupid is that, I shouldn't have to do that. But listening to him grip about it drives me more insane and I get it enough anyway, so why bring it on even more.
I do think that things are betterin some odd way, but there is so much more that needs to be overcome, we have a long way to go and yet no ones moving forward. I guess if I don't think about it, it doesn't bug me and I don't get moody, but when I do, I do get upset and it drives him insane because he doesn't know whats wrong, and I won't tell him.
I guess I should start writing daily with a good or bad mood and not only when I am mad or upset. things to think about. |