| I'm a queen, I'm a clown, I'm a G |
[05 Mar 2008|09:17pm] |
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mood |
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 giddy |
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music |
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dane cook-he's a silly bitch lol |
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Well I've been HSPA testing all week, well since Tuesday. I've been beasting!!! I think so anyway. Tomorrow's the last day so I'm pretty happy it's done. We've been having half days since Tuesday, but after tomorrow that's over. Haha.
Other than that life's been ok. I really don't know what to write. I've been writing Matt letters and the things I tell him lol well some things don't need to be said to anyone but him. Sometimes I shouldn't even tell him some of the things I'm thinkin. But we've known each other too long and too well for him to judge me. We've seen each other at our best and worse than our worst so he wouldn't judge me. On here, not so much.
Well anyhow...John and I have been talking. About nothing lol. I kinda asked him if we had a future and that I only asked because I don't wanna get hurt again and he said that it was understandable. Ha. So I really didn't get an answer, but I mean....I dunno. I would like things to go somewhere. Maybe at a quicker pace, but I guess I can't force it and if it's meant to be it's meant to be.
I've had feelings for almost 3 years and he told me he's felt the same. But you know how I am. For the greater good (I was with Steve aka Pedro at the time) I pushed my feelings aside. And I hate doing that. I wanna tell him how much I want to be with him and try again. (And I don't give the boyfriend girlfriend a second shot EVER) But I'm willing to try. I want to try. But I'm too afraid to say it because I don't want to hear him say he's not that serious about me. But I should suck it up and just go for it.
School has been crap the last few days. Well not really crap. Just minor things. This chick (who shall remain nameless) threw a ball at my head purposely on Monday. Probably cause her friend is feuding with mine. Then yesterday some random dude flipped me off on the way home for no reason and I saw him in the hall today and he looked at me in utter shock. Then some other dude had a bitch fit because I stepped on his heel by accident. *Sigh* People are dumb.
I've been talking to Sean. He doesn't hate me. We're cool now I guess. Not that we weren't cool in the first place, but things have been kinda strained. Well anyway, I feel like a bitch now for dissing him so much. Yeah, I was pissed and upset, but there's really no excuse for it. So if you're reading this Sean, I'm really sorry. I was being a silly cunt and let my emotions get the better of me.
Hmmm well I suppose this is pretty long enough. OOO!!! I HAD WENDY'S AT LONG LAST!!!! I had a Baconator and it was DELCIOUS!! lol. Just wanted to share that with you before I left.
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