Amber's Blurty

Subject:	Remorseful of this so called life of mine!
Time:	5:00 pm.
Mood:	blah.
Music:	"Pride" Echo and the bunnymen.

How can this be? How or why does this happend to me? The world shuts on me and nobody cares! Im sick and tired of having stupied quotes, like " Life isnt fair", "When one door closes, another door opens". "Time heals all wounds", Fuck that! That will be my qoute for life. Or how about my favorite " Life sucks", Im only 18 and I have better sense than 99percent of the assholes we call people.

A poem I wrote about myself, called That Girl

Who is she?
Too stupied, ugly,shy
Why would the guys talk to the ugly one?
People point and laugh at her
She goes and cries in the darkest hallway
She wants to smile but doesn't want to
show the uglyness of her smile.
Someday she will be bold and conquer her
fears, but for now she will hide them underneath
her skin.

I know it sounds cheesy but I am not the best writer.
I found my place, my place to vent, which I will be doing alot of. I dont want to sound all emo but I think its good to let out your emotions some how.

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Subject:	Too tired to think of a title. Haha
Time:	12:13 am.
Mood:	cold.
Music:	Hurtin' crue Descendents.

You guys have to read salad days. I love it so far im not finished yet but it is awesome. I also got $230 candy, a dvd and a cd from my mom and $50Oh wow this xmas break has been kinda good and kinda boring since i finally left home today since last sunday omg haha i have no life since i have no car and no job. I have money now hehe. Today me and ashley headed to the famous greatlakescrossing to do some damaged I mean by spending the cash haha. It took us about a good 30mins to get to khols shopping center ha. So much chaos. I realized there are alot of asshole drivers
out there. Geez. Alwell. I bought a jean jacket, descendents somery cd, the replacement cd, a clash tee shirt
minor threat dvd of them playing live. which is great, damn back in the day those shows were freaking
crazy, people jumping off the stage singing along with the band that would be sweet if that still happend today.
I got PCU dvd, and Dazed and confused. Damn that is alot of shit. Tomorrow me and jess are going shopping too
I am glad i havent cashed the $60 check i got so at least next weekend ill have some money. YAY plus my paycheck i never got hehe.

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Time:	8:46 pm.
Mood:	groggy.
Music:	Death Cab for cutie "We look like giants".

Lord of the rings was freakin awesome! Im sad that there will be no more:( Yesterday I went to the flintlocal
I seen this amazing band from chicago called the Detholz, my new found love ha. Their a mixture between devo, reggie and the full effects and butthole surfers. Capulet was ok but they played alot of their new stuff. I need to go to a show. I wanted to go to see the suicide machines but i had no one to go with. Alwell. 2more months until one of my fav bands comes PENNYWISE i cant wait I hope it goes by fast. I was so tired today i didnt get up until 3pm crazy. Its almost 9 and i havent smoke a cigg yet. I dont feel like to isnt that crazy? Anyways monday i gotta go to the denist because my crown fell out while i was brushing my teeth I was holy shit. Im glad i kept it cause its like $500 haha. I got the bling bling in my teeth. Tomorrow i get some gifts from my friends which shal be grand. HAHA. I already gave a few gifts away. I hope i find someone soon cause I dont wanna be left standing alone when it strikes midnight on new years eve! I know i am. I found a band that im like totally addicted to channel 3. Anyone up to go with me to see mustard plug? let me know only $10

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Subject:	What the fuck?
Time:	5:29 pm.
Mood:	pissed off.
Music:	Coal Chambers "friend?".

Im fucking in a very pissed off mood right now. Ever since school started. I had to get up early. that wasnt it but I had to get ready in like 5mins. Then I forgot to bring money for the field trip! People just piss me off.
I want high school to get over with very soon. So i dont have to see these god awful faces walking through
the hideous halls of my school. Then when i got home my front door was locked so i had to crawl though
tightly stairway to get to my basement. I just want this fucking day to end. I know what im going to do
over break! (I wish) sleep through the whole thing. Im also feeling shitting because im jealous of all
my friends that have something that i would do anything for their liscens! Im a bum. I dont even know what
to do right now. Im jobless carless and no liscens. Alwell right now my life is shitty. Ill make the best of it. I just need some time to my self! I know im not going to do anything exciting over xmas break. Alwell.

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Subject:	The List!
Time:	7:58 am.
Mood:	dorky.
Music:	Pennywise " Perfect People".

Bands that i have seen not in any order ** means how many times i have seen them

Nofx,Bad religion***,Pennywise, Dropkickmurphys**, Mad caddies, Rx Bandits, Less than Jake,
Save Ferris, Mxpx**, Rancid** Anti-flag***, Bouncing souls***, Tsunami Bomb, Strike Anywhere,
Sonic Youth**, Iggy Pop, Hatebreed**,System of a down, Rob Zombie, Marylin Mason, Slayer,
Sworn Enemy,Arch Enemy,Against Me,Thought Riot, No Movit, Unwritten Law, Sugar cult, Blink182***,311,
Goldfinger, Janes Addiction, Audio Slave, The Donnas, Rooney, Red Hot Chilli Pepers, Stone Temple Pilots,
Saves the Day, Weird Al, Queen of the stone Age**, Foo Fighters**, Chevelle, Jimmy Eat world, Mighty Mighty
bosstones, Green Day**,Aquabats, Deftones,Thursday, The Code, Suicide Machines, Mustard Plug, Iron Madien, Gin Blossoms, Verve Pipe, CCR, Blue Oyster Cult**, Foghat**, Guttermouth, Crystal Methods, Dj godfather, Dj, Scribble, Live, The Romatics, Mudvane, Pappa Roach, Linkin Park, Kittie, Nelly, Flogging Molly, Incubus, The Casuilties, Beach Boys, There is many more but i cant think right now its too early in the morning

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Subject:	AQUABATS and more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Time:	10:39 pm.
Mood:	indescribable.
Music:	Circle Jerks " Behind The Door".

Friday I went shopping with ash and then my dad picked me up and we ate at mon bbq then went
back to house to open xmas gifts. I got dumb and dumberer dropkickmurphys cd and a com cd
and $80 gift card to the mall. Yay hehe. Then sat I got thia food with esther and nate and then we
headed to AQUABATS show. It was so awesome. They were so funny. The first two bands were ok
they were local bands. the aquabats cam out in superhero costumes and stuff. we were skanking all
night. It was a swell time indeed.ha. I found out that my fav punk band is coming PENNYWISE. I had
to get tickets to that. Its not untill Feb but Im so happy. I seen them at Warped tour they were great
now i get to see them by themselfs. WAHOOO. Im so happy right now. Today at school we had are
cookie exchange. I had a buffet of cookies hehe. Then thursday are sci/fi class gets to take a
field trip to see freakin LORD OF THE RINGS. Hell ya. I cant wait i get to get out of school and see a movie ha.
Friday my friends and I are exchanging gifts at school. YAY.

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Subject:	About ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Time:	2:01 pm.
Mood:	ditzy.
Music:	The queers " I dont Care".

x: name = Amber Lynn Baldwin
:x: piercings none
:x: tattoos =none want to get the pennywise symbol
:x: height= 5`4
:x: shoe size =7
:x: hair color = hmm brwon with light brown high lights. Ive had my hair so many colors
:x: siblings = a brother

LAST...
:x: movie you rented = A view from the top
:x: movie you bought = SLC Punk
:x: song you listened to = "My God Pennywise
:x: song that was stuck in your head = " Baby got back Sir Mix A Lot
:x: cd you bought = Jet and Punk-o-Rama vol 8
:x: cd you listened to = Jet
:x: person you've called = Ashley
:x: person that's called you = Esther
:x: tv show you've watched = Seinfeld My fav show:)
:x: person you were thinking of = Jeff I need to call him

DO...
:x: you have a crush on someone = kinda
:x: you wish you could live somewhere else = everyday
:x: you think about suicide = yeah
:x: you believe in =dating online =no
:x: others find you attractive = Oh Yeah Im on fire! hehe
:x: you want more piercings = Eh I dont care
:x: you like cleaning = Hell No Im so messy
:x: you like roller coasters = love 'em
:x: you write in cursive or print = print

FOR OR AGAINST...
:x: long distance relationships = for em
:x: using someone =against
:x: suicide = not sure
:x: killing people = against
:x: teenage smoking = Yes because I smoke Shh
:x: driving drunk = against
:x: gay/lesbian relationships = for it
:x: soap operas = against

HAVE YOU...
:x: ever cried over a girl= no
:x: ever cried over a boy = not yet
:x: ever lied to someone = yep, sometimes you gotta do it
:x: ever been in a fist fight = no
:x: ever been arrested = no
WHAT...
:x: shampoo do you use = suave
:x: shoes do you wear = Vans of course
:x: are you scared of = Being alone for ever

NUMBER...
:x: of times I have been in love? = 0
:x: of times I have had my heart broken? =none
:x: of hearts I have broken? = 0
:x: of girls I have kissed? 0
:x: of boys I have kissed? =1
:x: of girls I've slept with? = 0
:x: of boys I've slept with? = 0
:x: of guys you've obsessed over who wouldn't date you: None

:x: of times my name has appeared in the newspaper?= two times ortonville , school paper
:x: of scars on my body? 3
:x: of things in my past that I regret? = 1 never should have done it
:x: of guys that have seen you naked? = none
:x: number of girls that have seen you naked?= none

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE...
:x: pretty – yes
:x: funny sometimes I laugh at my own jokes ha
:x: hot - im smokin hot
:x: friendly – most of the time
:x: amusing - yes
:x: ugly – no
:x: loveable – for sure
:x: caring – yep
:x: sweet – Im sweet as sugar
:x: dorky –me naw hehehe

favorite:
5 letter word: money
actor/actress: Not sure too many
Candy: Sour gummie bears
Cartoon: The simpsons

Cereal: Dont like cereal that much
Chewing gum: good gum
Color(s): pink or pink
Color nail polish: none
Day of week: Saturday
Least fave day: Sunday
Flower: I dont really care for flowers
Jello flavor: Cherrie
Jewelry: none
Special skills/Complaining, making people laugh.
Summer/Winter: SUMMER!
Trampolines or swimming pools: swimming pools

|| Person who last.. ||

Slept in your bed: me
Saw you cry: my mom
Made you cry: people at my work! GRRR...

You went to the movies with: Ashley
Yelled at you: mom
Sent you an email: no one:(

|| Have you ever.. ||

Said "I love you" and meant it?: no
Gone out in public in your pajamas: yeah
Kept a secret from everyone: yup
Cried during a movie: of nope
Planned your week based on the TV Guide: just a day hehe
Been on stage: nope
Been to New York: no
Been to California: no
Hawaii: YES with Essy hehe
China: no
Canada: Yes
Europe: Yes
Asia: no
South America: no
Australia: not yet
Wished you were the opposite sex: nope
What time is it now?: 2:16pm
Apples or bananas?: Apples
Blue or red?: Red
Walmart or target?: Target
Spring or Fall?: Spring because we get out of school YAY
What are you gonna do after you finish this?: leave school and go home
What was the last meal you ate?: Pizza
Are you bored?: yeah im always
Last noise you heard?: kids talking
Last smell you sniffed?: weed hehe jk i dont know
|| Friendship/Love ||

Do you believe in love at first sight?: yes
Do you want children one day & if so, how many?: I want NONE I dont like kids that much
Most important thing to you in a friendship is: honesty and trust

|| Other Info ||

Criminal record?: don’t have one
Do you speak any other languages?: nope
Last book you read: I dont know
Name some of your favorite things in your bedroom?: CD player
Worst feeling in the world: loneliness
Who you love: my family and freinds
Who you miss: my friends

|| You ||

Nickname(s): Amhole, Amoe, Bitch, hehe ernie, too many to list
Initials: ALB
How old do you look?: 12
How old do you act?: 5
Glasses/Contacts: neither
Braces: nope
Do you have any pets?: had a dog named hunter
You get embarrassed:easily

What makes you happy?: alcohol hehe j/k music hanging wit friends concerts

|| Finish the sentence: ||

I Love to... smoke hehe rock out to music
I Miss... being in a circle pit
I Wish... i had my liscens and a bf
I Hope... i get laid
I'm Annoyed by... not being smart
I Am... an alien hehe j/k
I Want to Be... in a punk rock band

I Would Never... cheat on someone that im dating

I Am Tired of... being depressed
I Will Always be... a pervert

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Subject:	Thrice,Thursday,Deftones! Three great bands!
Time:	1:30 pm.
Mood:	weird.
Music:	Black Flag "Rise Above".

Thursday was the best I ate so much food. I figured out that I have to eat something before i go to bed
because I have been getting up set stomaches. then I ate something and I didnt get one.
Anyways. Friday I had to work then did nothing cause no one was home. Saturday
worked then headed out to my bros house to get ready to go to the Deftones. It was so awesome.I missed thrice and some of thursday. But i have already seen thrice at warped tour. There were so many hot guys there. My bro found his roomate and he sat by us. He is really cute.they started to play its ur birthday by 50cent but hes like i cant rap man what iam thinking ha. He sounds just like he sounds on the cd but better. They played my favorite songs last. It was on there first cd. The concert ended at 8:30. So we went to my bros house and stayed there for awhile. Then about 10:30 me kelly dylan and mike headed on out, i was kinda messed up at this point. We were going to the shelter. Mike had to go to the gas stastion and his car started to smoke so we didnt
go. Which I didnt really mind. I had a really good night, Sunday I had to work until 9 which sucked. Well that was my weekend. I was so happy I found out that my bro got me MSI tickets. Wahoo its this wed. I hope no one will be mad at me. Man I am going to be all concert out.

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