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Below are the 15 most recent journal entries recorded in
Night's Blurty:
| Saturday, March 12th, 2005 | |
| 2:05 am | Hello? Are you still here? Wow, this thing is still here. I'm sorta in shock. Lets see, the last time I typed anything in here was WAYYYYYY back in November, man that was before all the bad shit happened. And I thought it couldn't get any worse. Well, it did. Met some awsome chick, her name was Rebecca, well....Sky really. She hated the name Rebecca. That was cool for a while, like a month or so. It happened about 2 weeks after I wrote my last entry. I should have known something was up when she left me to go out with some other guy and came crawling back. But no, I didnt. Live and learn. Again............. Anyway, I took her back, and it was cool for a while. But then she ended up messing around with her X- Fiance. She lied to me. But I found out. Then she tried to make a fool outta me in the Cafe. I didn't let her tho, I threw everything in her face. On a happier note, my good friend is going to hook up with the chick he likes, and another one is my friend Jenn is going to be able to go out with the guy shes been after for a while. So thats good for the both of them. Anyway, the reason for starting again is to get some thoughts out, so I dont explode. Sky called me today, she wants to get back together and shes sorry, BLAH BLAH BLAH. I dont even know why I picked up the phone. I went off on her, saying that there was no chance. But it did bring up all the pain and shit that she caused. Reminded me how lonley life is out here. I'm tempted to....I dont know what im tempted to do. Just know that i'm temped to do something. NO THAT DOES NOT MEAN KILL MYSELF! SO CALM DOWN IF YOUR THINKING THAT! I need to meet some new people, maybe I can ask jenn to intoduce me to some of her friends, the drive isnt that bad, like an hour and a half or so, two at the most. Alright, I'm done for tonight, welcome back my avid folllowers. ~Chris Current Mood:  discontentCurrent Music: Barenaked Ladies: Light up my room |
| Thursday, November 18th, 2004 | |
| 12:14 am | Done Fuck everything. I'm done fighting. Current Mood:  numb |
| Sunday, November 7th, 2004 | |
| 5:50 am | chapter one I finshed the first chapter now and am pretty happy about it. Its going to take longer then i thought to get this done right, but i will get it done. Now to Dennys for some breakfast. Current Mood:  cheerfulCurrent Music: Bowling for Soup - 1985 |
| 2:28 am | inspration I know what happened last night, I snapped, i lost it, and IVE GONE INSANE!! YAHHHHHH! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES IM GOING TO KILL YOU WITH A SPOON!!!!!!!!!!!! No, i had thought about writing a book a few months ago, just a quick one, about growing up. But i had put it past me. Then when i drove sam home, she went through every emotion you can think of in 3 hours. For some reason, and acording to my pro personality test that I agree with, it says I feel others emotions. Ask n e one of my friends, and they will tell you thats the truth. So, i was driving home for three and a half hours on my own, and i guess mentally my mind was chugging away subconcously! So now, because i had all that stuff happen, my mind freaked out and dumped it all on me at once. I have to write this stuff down now. Here i go. Current Mood:  determinedCurrent Music: John Mayer- Daughters |
| Saturday, November 6th, 2004 | |
| 5:04 am | What the hell just happened to me I really can not describe what happened to me, i am ugg i cant even think straight. It all started while playing Halo, i messed around for a little bit, and then I decided to go buy sweedish fish, i had a hankering for them all day. And Yes, I used the word hankering. I left, and then realized i left my cell phone in my apartment. So, had to get OUT of the car, (I was still in the parking lot of my complex) And go and get it off of my cofee table. So I leave, and drive to the bottom of the hill where the 24 hour Comberland farms is to get gas. Well, in my haste to leave, I realized, I had put my wallet on the table when I had picked up my cell. So again, back into the car, back to the complex, and back up the hill. Got my phone, got my wallet, OK, I'm set to go. Back to the car, only to realize I'd not closed my door on my car, it was kinda sitting there open. Plus, I have not been able to type all day. I dont know why, but it has been kinda scary. So, I go to the store again, get gas, and go to the Stop and Shop to get my fish. I Bought those, some OJ, and two books, Angels and Demons by Dan Brown, and another one about a guy who gets trapped in some weird Ditch in colorado, and the book is what he wrote while he was trapped. Anyway, left there, and I was suddenly complled to drive down route 2 to god knows where. So I jumped on route 2, and went past my road, past the movie thetere, and then some song came on the radio, i forget what it was, like Walk away or something. DAMN IT I DON'T REMEMBER! And suddenly something overcame me, I could not brethe, I felt like I was floating, all the blood rushed to my head and I started to gasp, Just everything, went away. Just POOF. I felt free. Almost like a religous expearence, it just slammed into me, my heart went nuts, and I could not control myself, I wasn't there. I have been feeling alone and lonesome all day, and acording to the personality test i took like six months ago, they finally gave me my results and it says being by myself takes away all my energy, and then I cant feel anything. I finally got my breath back and noticed that I had gone from 40 to like 65 and that I had better slow down. So i did, but something told me I should keep driving. I stayed on route 2 to make getting home easy, and then as i slid into exeder, i had a weird flash happen in front of me, and lo and behold there were these 2 deer crossing the road, I had to hit my brakes so I didnt hit the second one, and they bounded away. So i kept on going for another 10 minutes. I turned around, and made my way back, and it happened again, I lost my breath, and started to float, only not as bad this time. I was a very small feeling compaired to what had happened before. So I start driving home now, and I cant think because of what happened, and I miss a turn for route 2. So I start going north, knowing that I will eventually get where i need to go, and the "I'm so sorry I didnt call" song comes on the radio, and I look up out my windshield for a second, and I see stars. Something I have not seen in a couple of monthes, thanks to this city. And I have to stop and get out. I have to look at what I see. So I pull over, and get out, and start looking up into the sky. It's so quiet and peaceful...Holy crap, i just remembered i mentioned to the lady at the checkout that my skydiving was a religous experence. Jimmaney fuck-tart. I just remembered that. So i get out and look at the stars, and there is this one star over to the right a little bit, and its brighter then the rest of them, and its twinkling. Slowly, and it just keeps doing this, and im parked on the side of the highway, stareing at this freaking star, and looking up. Then i see the flash of headlights, and I realize i'de better go, just in case is someone not to friendly.... Or a cop, that would be hard to exlpain, I JUST WANTED TO SEE THE STARS, THAT'S WHY I'M PARKED ON THE SIDE OF THE HIGHWAY. So i start to go, but i keep lookin up at this star, and it twinkles away, like its winking at me. So i finally start to get my mind back, but I can't stop thinking of what happened to me. And then as I pulled onto my road, 1985 by bowling for soup comes on the radio, and thats my birthyear. So I fly into the parking lot, and Im shaking as I get outta my car. I can't even hold onto my keys, i dropped them like 3 times from the lot to the door, and then once in front of my OWN door to my apartment. And I picked up my laptop and started writing. And I wish sam was awake so I could talk to her about this, but her cell is off and I aint calling the house. And shes not online. She might be able to help me think this out, shes probobly the only one thats going to understand this blurp of whatever the fuck it is. And the clock says 5:04 when I started, but now its 5:48 am and Im not going to sleep, because I can think, or i might because Im so lost about what happened. What the hell just happened to me, i dont know.....geeze, alright I cant type right now. Im done, sam, if u read this before I tell u about it please call me. Peace people, and good morning. Current Mood: Words can not describe...... Current Music: I dont even know, that song like walking away song...... |
| Wednesday, November 3rd, 2004 | |
| 3:44 am | Still... (Z...Z...Z...), HUH, wha, why am I still awake? Oh yeah, they are still not back from the cape, I hope they are alright...... Current Mood:  groggyCurrent Music: Green Day - Brain Stew |
| 1:24 am | Shitacki without the ACKI !!!!!!!! Here, laying on floor. Now my head is on the floor as well. Watching CBS news on the elections. O goodie, this is going to be a long night. Sam left and went with Steve and Ryan to pick up thad on the cape. I could use that energy drink now..... She said she didnt want to stay cause shes pissed off at asshole. I should have gone with them tho, its extreamly boring here. Played Nintendo (the original from the 80's) for a while, then Sega, then N64, then Xbox. Kinda moving up the lines of modern-ness. Suddenly im compelled to write something. Your mind is a maze, twisting and turning as new things happen. Walking through this warped path, it suddenly breaks and closes behind you Now your lost, you cant get out of your own mind All you have is whats ahead, and you don't know whats around the bend you want to know whats going to happen, but you cant see your lost without your mind, but now my own mind is blinding me damn, it does look like bush won tho, so thats fresh news, now to wait 2 hours for my friends im done Current Mood:  blahCurrent Music: Aluminum- BareNaked Ladies |
| Wednesday, October 27th, 2004 | |
| 1:48 am | A little time Been a little while since i have posted, been workin, school. I got sick over the weekend, which SUCKED!!! I have being sick, cause I can't do shit for myself, and I can't stand that. But w/e. Going to Maine for a party on the 31st, see sam. But hafta go to bed, class in the AM. Wait, o yeah, i am now the PC tech for my store and I might end up the Electronics lead, OI! Current Mood:  lazyCurrent Music: Goo Goo Dolls - Big Machine |
| Wednesday, October 13th, 2004 | |
| 1:08 am | Again, an early morning post Eh, nothing of real intrest to report, going to class, falling asleep in math cause its stuff i already know. My back hurts from the Damn 3 hour lecture from my programming instructor. Blah blah blah, control structor, blah, execute imput blah!!!!!!!! God it was annoying! I have to go to boston and work for jimmy today, again a family fued. Steve is enjoying school, and i have to go be a witness in court on thursday. So THAT will be fun. Had a nice whind down day today after work. Ate some food, had some tea. If felt good, and now im updating people on my very uninteresting life. But still, being on your own IS fun.... :) So im doing good, just chilling out and getting ready for bed now, night people! PEACE! ~Night Current Mood:  calmCurrent Music: Semisonic - Closing Time |
| Sunday, October 10th, 2004 | |
| 11:50 pm | Computer Well, I just completed my intel training. [ I'm wearing the hat :) ] Which means I can get my new computer system for like a third of what it should be. Plus, I got to see SAM TODAY!!!!!!!!! WEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOO! For those of you board and reading at very strange times, Sam was my best friend before she moved to Maine, and I rarley get to see her. Well, I just did today, so I'm in a very good mood! Steve should be calling soon, and we are going to do something. Speaking of calling, the kitchen is calling my stomach, so I will be on tomorrow. NIGHT PEOPLE! PEACE! ~Night~ Current Mood:  excitedCurrent Music: Barenaked Ladies - If I Had a Million Dollars |
| Saturday, October 9th, 2004 | |
| 12:50 am | old friends I talked to Laura today. The laura from long ago.....Wait, wow me, sounding like some overwound and really poor written movie. Once upon a time, in a land far far away. God damn, that was really pathetic. I probobly should be asleep now, seeing I have to work at 7, and then DJ a wedding at like 4. Oh yeah, then WAKE UP AND GO TO A DAMN INTEL TRAINING! Damn it. O well, what are you going to do. At least I am going to see Sam this weekend. I blew away my new manager tonight! DUDE, MY FRIEND TRUMAN JUST SIGNED ON! NICE! Im a going to go talk to him, seeing I havent in like 2 monthes! Current Mood:  amusedCurrent Music: Third Eye Blind - Semi-Charmed Life |
| Friday, October 8th, 2004 | |
| 1:04 am | Long Time Well, its been a VERRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYY long time since i have posted, like a few months. God, going to college is a big pain in the ass. But I’m loving my classes, and the town is kewl, we have everything like right next to us. For those of you that don't know, I go to the New England Institute of Tech, and I am getting a Bachelors degree of science in the IT ( computer) Field. It's EARLY morning on Oct. 11, Friday, and I don’t have class today, so I went and saw ladder 49. It was really good, plus, the seats in our movie theater recline! Which made it O so nice to watch. But there is one thing that is going on that I was not really expecting. It makes sense, but I don't understand it. It is VERY lonley here. Steve has gone home, but I have to stay and work. And it is very lonley. I miss my family, I miss my friends. I could really use a good hug right now, but there is no one to give it to me. I don't really know anyone around here yet, so I can't call them, and all my friends are asleep, aside from sam, but she lives 3 1/2 hours from where I am. I almost have a mind to drive down to the cape and suprize my family, but i know i wont do that. My old buddy Truman was on, but he signed off, I miss him. I miss a lot of things. Hell, I even miss my old store. Things ARE going well, DAMN I need a hug. Or something......But i'm not going to get it. Alright, enough of me rambling on, I might go to bed, I don't know, i'm not sure if I can sleep. I miss everyone. Current Mood:  gloomyCurrent Music: Seether - Broken |
| Tuesday, August 17th, 2004 | |
| 12:22 am | Suddenly compelled to write something. Taken so far, leaving people that I care about. They are all leaving, as am I. Traveling down a path that we are not sure of; afraid of walking alone. We must find people that we truly care about, ones that will not leave our side, even if they are hundreds of miles away. I want someone that I can go up to and give a hug. One where I can get one back. We can just sit and talk about the good times. When life was easy, and things made sense. Wondering what will become of me, and my friends, as I get ready to leave for the crazyest trip of my life. But will anyone walk next to me, and tell me things are ok? Or be at my side when I have a bad day? Or just lay down next to me one day and just talk..... So many things flow throgh my head. I just hope me and my friends make it through. I can only hope and pray that they know how I feel, and they feel the same way. Current Mood:  weirdCurrent Music: Third Eye Blind-Losing a whole year |
| Monday, August 16th, 2004 | |
| 10:18 pm | WORK God, I go into work, and I cant even get into the back room to punch in before I get BOMBARDED by people. God that was a long day, then I got stuck on the damn service desk. Christ, now i have to computers to fix. It's been an alright day, shit, I still have steves keys, i just thought of that. And the red sox won! YAY! O.K. just another three weeks till im outta here. then i can be done with store 1116. HELLOOOO STORE 1230! Now im off to fix some computers. I'm out for now, now i just need to think if I like doing this thing. Its alright so far, off I go. Current Mood:  busyCurrent Music: Green Day-Basket Case |
| 1:35 am | Start O.k. So i'm starting one a these thingys, and seeing how things are going to turn out when im done. I don't like this font tho..... Damn it i can't change it. N E way. Getting ready for college, going to NEIT, YEAH BABY! I.T. network major, thats going to be fun; movin out in like 3 weeks, got a car, and yet still a little lost. I dont know if school is going to work, or if the people r going to b kewl. Saw my "little sister" Sam over the weekend, that kinda sucked. Every time i c her i realize how much i miss her, and that sucks. Plus sleepin in my car didnt help, but W/E it was worth it. Hung out with her and jody, had a good time. I think we abused jody a little too much tho, but O well. Leaving home is really just starting to set in, and thats hard, cause im going to miss my little brother and my sisters, and seeing Sam+Jody might not happen as much, wich also sucks...a lot..... and not to mention missing my parents. I'm just a little overwhelmed right now, and unsure of myself. And a little unsure of what i want. Alright, thats enough rambling for one night, PEACE! ~Night~ Current Mood: discontentCurrent Music: Godsmack-Running Blind |