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Randomness is a gift... [04 Oct 2003|11:02pm]
[ mood | sleepy ]
[ music | tv in the next room..kerry ]

I realized I'm not a lesbian now...haha. But no seriously, I do have another girlfriend. And yes, Cierra is completely ok with it...and so is she. And so am I. Oh, for those of you who don't know who it is yet, it's Kerry. I'm currently at her house...she's currently sitting beside me.
But neways, for other news...Jaton's a dickhead. Yes, yes...he really is!!
Most of you know what happened with us;therefore, I will not go into it.
I think I'm better off without guys. I've found that within the past several years, they've been nothing but trouble.

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Happiness can be good... [14 Sep 2003|01:58pm]
[ mood | amused ]
[ music | Coal Chamber- "Fiend" ]

Went downtown with Cierra on Friday. I had fun. I spend time with Robbie, for once. It was cool. I just hope I feel the same 3 weeks from now. I hate my relationships with guys cuz after about 2 or 3 weeks, I loose interest. Except with Jaton...I always felt the same for him. But he's gone...yeah, I'm over him!!
I'm just glad it's not this complicating with Cierra. It's been like 2 and a half weeks and the feelings are still there. I'm seriously wondering if I don't like girls a lot more than guys....hmmm...maybe I should think about that some more.
Yeah, ok....I'm going to think about that one...

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Grrr... [08 Sep 2003|06:52pm]
[ mood | stressed ]
[ music | Korn-"Make Me Bad" ]

I had this meeting thingy with my lawyer and the 2 other girls....most of you know what I'm talking about. It was crazy and upsetting, nonetheless. So my mom took me out to dinner and all that good stuff. Nothing too special, Burger King to be exact.
But newayz, I can't wait til tomorrow. I have my childcare class, which means I have to "teach" at this daycare. It's fun for the most part. At least I'll have experience with kids...not that I want any!! I still have biology homework left over, but I'm so may just have to wait. I'm sure it won't mind!
I kinda messed up with my whole guy situation. It's not that I wanted this all to happen, but it seemed like every guy in roanoke wanted to get with me, which forced me to choose between 2 really great guys! I truely am know who I'm talkin' about! Try to forgive me...
But...blah! I don't think I'm happy anymore. life is completely boring over the summer and totally packed when school starts. Yeah, I'm blaming the school!!! That sounds about's all the school's fault. Damn them to hell!
And while I'm on that subject, why the hell are they gonna try to steal our corner?!? Well, that's a whole other thing, and I feel like I'm out!

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For once in my life. [30 Aug 2003|04:03pm]
[ mood | excited ]
[ music | Murderdolls- "Love at First Fright" ]

I'm sooo happy now! Me and Cierra are finally going out! Steph talked to her on the phone the other night and Cierra wrote me a note yesterday asking me out. I just hope she's as happy as I am. And I don't think JJ will care, so it should work out just fine!
But school-wise, I've started the year out bad. I've already skipped 3 times. It's not that I mean to...I just get caught up in all the excitement! And then it brings back all my memories from last year when I skipped. But next week is gonna be different...seriously! I actually have a B3 now too, so I won't be able to use that as an excuse any more anyways.
Brain and Robert are back at Fleming this year too!!! It's great. They were breaking all my bracelets during lunch yesterday, which doesn't surprise me. But it's not like they're gettin any, LOL!
I caught up with Chrissy, one of my old friends from elementary school too. It was fun talking to her after so long. It's been like 6 or 7 years! She was telling me about everyone at Salem...which is were I originally started out. It's sucks now, thinking about it, but it wasn't so bad back then. She's supposed to introduce to her boyfriend's friend, Dillion. They play in a band...Shadowpool. Dillion's the bassist!! But that's gonna happen sometime this weekend and if all goes well, I'll have a cute new boyfriend on Tuesday!
And UglyFest is next Sunday!!!! Yay! I'm definately going! I'm gonna ask Cierra if she can go, too. I hope her mom lets her cuz it's always funner if you bring someone...unless you're like Ashley and know EVERYONE there!! LOL, Ash!! But it should be good. Emmy told me that Jeremy and Adam's band is gonna play, which would be their first performance.
But I need need water, so that's my life for now.

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Oh So Confusing Mind [16 Aug 2003|01:43pm]
[ mood | optimistic ]
[ music | Static-X- This is Not ]

I finally went to go see Pirates of The Caribbean last night. It was the best!! And Johnny Depp looks so hot in it....yay!
I did go to the Factory the other night. It was rather fun...although when I left, I couldn't hear anything outta my right ear. Oh well, it was great, so I'm not complaining. I did finally get to see Manna this summer and Emmy, so it was cool.
And once again, I'm not sure what's up with Joker cuz I know I said I was giving up on him, but then I saw him and now I don't know. He said he has a girlfriend or something now, but he also said that she was going to Illinois or somewhere for 4 months, so I think I know what that means, but I'm not sure if that's what he intended to mean. I'm so confused!! But then he said something about him liking me and that he has no chance with me...but everyone who reads my journal knows that he does, so I don't see what the problem is. Damn guys and their insecurities!! I hate that in a guy...but then again, I don't want them to be so hung on themselves and thinking that they're "all that" when they're really not. *cough, cough...Stephanie* So anyways....I don't know whether I should call him or not....or just let it go since a new school year is coming up in about a week and a half.
Speaking of school!! I'm so not ready in a way, but yet I am. I'm just curious as to what's gonna happen with me and Jaton this year. Not that I want anything to happen at all, but I can't help but remember that we've dated or messed several times since we first dated almost 2 years ago. Eh, oh well...I'm not gonna be as nice and caring as I usually am toward him and making him think that I really want him back cuz I don't. Even though his head sometimes gets stuck up his ass and he still thinks that anyways. Oh well...I'm not worried...things will go just peachy!

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Here we go again... [12 Aug 2003|01:12pm]
[ mood | hopeful ]
[ music | Orgy-"Stitches" ]

Turns out I can go to the show tonight!!! That makes me happy cuz I'm supposed to be grounded, but oh well. I'm not complaining. I have to call Emmy later to cuz I'm supposed to give her and manna a ride there. I just hope everything goes ok cuz neither one of us have rides home...which sux!

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[10 Aug 2003|03:05pm]
[ mood | happy ]
[ music | Coal Chamber-"Loco" ]

I think my life may actually be making sense now. It's rather amazing! Me and my mom have gotten along for the past 2 or 3 days with no arguements, which is a miracle. And I finally called Manna last night! I haven't talked to her in ages, so I thought she was pissed off at me or something. Turns out she wants things back the way they were before Stephanie, too, so hopefully it'll happen!! I think it'll be easier when school starts, too, cuz Stephanie won't be there to get in the way. It's all very joyful! Yet my guy life still sucks...SHIT! And I thought everything was going perfectly!

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Sometimes I wonder... [09 Aug 2003|12:16pm]
[ mood | hungry ]
[ music | Orgy- Fiction (Dreams in Digital) ]

I went to the coffee shop last night for a change. It was oh so fun. I got a ride from Mel...and he didn't rape me!! The "cool people" didn't get there until about 10:30. I stayed until 12...and got grounded! But I saw Joker there. He didn't say much...just the simple "hi" and "bye". Oh well, I think I'm actually gonna give up before it gets any more weird. Just to stay safe. And plus, I have a school year coming who knows what's gonna happen!
I went to the Blue Ridge open house thing. I was actually thinking about going there this coming up school year, but then I realized Stephanie was gonna be there. I seriously hate her! But anyways, and now that I found out that Manna's still gonna go to Fleming next year...along with Amber Clark, hahaha!...I've decided to try going to Fleming without all the skipping. But I have to say, it's gonna be hard! But I can do it!! The only thing I'm worried about is jaton's bullshit, and I could be getting away from all of that by going to Blue Ridge, but I'd miss all my super-cool friends! Hahaha.
Oh, I saw Robert at the Blue Ridge open house. He was supposed to have graduated last year from there, but he failed some kinda test or something, so he has to go back. Eh, I think it's funny!
But yeah...good news, though! Stephanie won't be at Fleming next year!!! YAY! She said she's definately made up her mind about going to Blue Ridge, so it's all peachy. Which means no one will have to put up with her bitchyness! It'll all be nice and dandy!

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Just another... [04 Aug 2003|10:22am]
[ mood | tired ]
[ music | Korn "Did my Time" ]

Well...I didn't go to the Factory after all, but it wasn't Emily's fault. And I actually think I was better off NOT going because it rained, and I would've been stuck outside in it! That's not I sat at home and did the usual watching tv and listening to cds. All very fun indeed.
But...good news!!! I finally talked to Joker!! Yay! I called him on Saturday and he didn't answer his cell, but it was on. So I called Emily and we talked for a few minutes when I got a beep. So I clicked over and he was like "did someone call me from this number?" I was like "it's me"...and of course I had to explain myself. So I found out he's in Indiana, but he's only visiting, and he told me to call him on Wednesday. Which is exactly what I'm gonna do!! So hopefully we'll be able to do something this weekend. But I don't know...I don't wanna start liking him, and then he say "well, you're cool, but only as a friend." It's never happened to me before, but it could. Eh, oh well...I'll see.
I'm supposed to go the Emmy's some time this week. My mom said she didn't care, as usual, so I'm free to go. It really should be fun...seriously.
Speaking of my mom...she hasn't been caring at all lately. Not that I want her to, cuz now she's letting me go places. At least more than I used to. Like I was supposed to be grounded for about a week or two, starting last Friday, for "back-talking", but she never said anything whenever I asked to talk on the phone, so I guess she forget. Haha...forgetfulness is great, especially when it's your parents who forget! But I just wish I had a car. It'll be a lot easier. Damn people who can drive already and have their own transportation! Damn them to hell!
Anyways...I'm writing this at like 10:30 in the morning, so I'm not even the slightest bit awake yet. Yeah so that means I got up at like 9, got dressed, put on very little make-up, stumbled out to the car, and rode to the library...and course, no one's online, so I figure...I might as well sit here and stare at the computer screen until someone from my buddy list comes on. But that could be a while. Oh, how sucky my life is!

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One new entry... [02 Aug 2003|01:01pm]
[ mood | determined ]
[ music | Orgy "Stitches" ]

Yay...this is my first entry. It's so joyful! I've been wanting one for awhile now, so it's pretty cool that I finally have one. Thanx to Ashley!! Haha...much love!!
But on the the juicy stuff...hehehe! I should be going to the Factory tonight. Notice I say "should be" because I'm only going if Emily's going...more than likely. And she hasn't given me an exact answer yet, so I don't know. She said something about giving me a ride there, so hopefully it all works out. But I'm broke off my ass so it should be very interesting! If not, I guess I can resort to calling Mel and seeing if he can give me a ride, even though I prefer not to.
I'm supposed to go the Factory tomorrow too...with Joker. But when I tried to call him, he didn't answer. That sounds really familiar. *cough, cough* Oh well, for those of you who truely know me, know exactly who I'm talking about. Speaking of Jaton...hehehe...I'm glad we're over in a way. I realized after what he did to me, I can always do better! And I really hate to say that because I do still love him, as sickening as that may sound. But it's for the best!
So in my conquer to find a desent goth guy, I've come up with a mission. At the Factory, I shall find a hot sexy goth guy....and actually talk to him! I have one in mind, but I don't know if he'll be there since it's gonna be a punk show. But he was there last Saturday, so I might get lucky. And from there, we'll talk and laugh. And that's all I've come up with so far, but if it goes well, I'm sure it'll lead to other things.

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First Post. [02 Aug 2003|12:25pm]
I love you Crystal. I hope you enjoy your Blurty and figure everything out. Just click on friends to keep up with my journal.
Love Mouth (Ashley)
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