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3 of my best friends. [17 Jun 2004|01:31pm]
All three of you where what i considered my best friends at one point.. some shorter than others.

Erica-- i shared so many times with you. Do you remember tha time we smoked one of aarons blackandmilds and my parents came home and we threw it and ran inside and started changing and spraying ourselves with perfume... All those nightes we stayed up way late just talking about crazy things and crazy boys... That night at Hollys when we got shanes screen name and talked to him all night and found out Holly's cousin was gay and then whatched her dance like a ghetto girl in those short shorts... Wht about Doug..? God all those things wed been through, to think ihavent talked to you in nearly a year is crazy. Did you forget my phone number? 307-4036

Stephanie--Our friendship started so quickly, if only it wouldnt have ended just as quickly. I understand our situation, actually, i was in that position at one point, but it wasnt nearly as extreme. I forgive you for all the mean things that you have said about me to everyone (immature shit..) i read it all, and im sorry, but i wouldnt have if He wouldnt have gotten into my stuff first.. i miss you a lot, remember that night me you and aimee went to your house? That day you pierced my bellybutton and all those times that when we where stretching our ears... one day soon, lets by twos? piss James and John both off.. they have more than the one thing in common that i thought they did, they both hate stretched ears. Im glad you havent taken them out.. I miss you, and all you have to do is call me up and say you are sorry for hte past few months, and it will all go away, i dont blame any of this on you.. even though i probably should.

Josh-- We dont have nearly as much memories that i can talk about in here as we should. Mostly just nights on the internet.. a few basketball games, and one trip to the mall. one basketball game where we got together? and the other when we broke up? isnt that insane the reason? because of holly... thats so funny to me now. I guess we dont talk much anymore because we go to diffrent schools, diffrent friends, and diffrent lifestyles.. which is fine, i do miss our talks though.

I miss you all so much, Josh the least though.. ha only because i still see you sometimes and we didnt end on a bad note =P not that any of you guys will read this.. but maybe one day you will come across blurty and remember in a distant life you had one, sign in and find this, i love you all, and i always will.. you guys mean so much to me and always have.

[25 Nov 2003|09:24pm]
someone being taken from your life in a matter of seconds. Theres nothing you, or anyone else could have done to stop it.

Shes driving regularly, coming home from college. someone going way fast crosses the yellow line and hits you head on. die on impact. buckled up and all. SHe did nothing wrong yet she die. why wasnt there a red light that last 5 seconds longer? why didnt she forget something and have to go back? why wasnt it anyone but her?

Any thoughts of suicide i've ever had are wiped from my thoughts. Watching my mom's best friend watch her daughter die accidently broke me. its so insane watching ms penny hugging her own mom screaming for laura and how unfair this all is. its horrible. the worst feeling i could ever have.. Watching ben ask why everyone was crying, and why everyone was over there. His brother trying to explain it to him. All her friends sitting in a circle in her room sharing storys about her through tearstained faces Its all unfair. and there isnt anything i can do.
1 Beautiful|lies

[14 Nov 2003|03:40pm]
i took those quizes, lol, im like 80% punk, 50 % emo, 53 % grunge 7% metal head.

Im so punk.

Minor threat owns trio.

on to better things im goin to hte movies tonmight with James, and im prolly gunna go to am's tomorrow cause i havent been over there in al ong time and i miss Nicholas! lol

omg, [06 Nov 2003|08:46pm]
the last 15 minutes have been insane. james is mad at me joe is mad at me. james is mad and u, joe is mad at you, leanne is killing her self right now and i cant call her and talk to her because my brother is on the phone. jermey is all
Duplexbert: he said he hates you now
Duplexbert: :-(
BeautifuLAnomouS: yeah, he said he loved me monday.
Duplexbert: he kept saying fuck her over and over
BeautifuLAnomouS: blah.

bout james. idk this is gay.

james=blah [04 Nov 2003|03:19pm]
[ mood | blah ]
[ music | judy is a punk- ramones ]

people need to make up, seriously, why must he be so immature.

1 Beautiful|lies

[01 Nov 2003|11:03am]
Lets see, Our football game was thursday instead of Friday because of halloween so i stay home alone while my family piled up, drove an hour and a half, to loose. ha. Last night MY mom braught me to James's house and we hung out there for a while with mikkey and billy until they left.. we watched this really wierd movie with Micheal Jackson dancing with these zombie lookin things idk, it was really funny. We left, hung out till about 930 and then we went get amber at kelseys. When we got down stars into kelseys room, Nick was under covers with Kalia, Amber sittin by corey and kelsey was with some other dude. so we told amber it was time to leave, and corey walked her out. James and I walked ahead and corey kissed her goodnight. GAG ME. i find out later that He also asked her out after that sweet little goodnight kiss. Of course amber who has liked this loser since the 6th grade, doesnt say no.. ugh, oh well though. I guess i should be happy for her. HAHAH IM NOT. cause coreys gay and will do nothing good for her. anyhow. so James takes us to ambers and we go nearly right to sleep. yes. so that was my halloween. i met James last halloween. I think thats funny.

I now have 2 friends on Birth control, and 1 that wants to be. you all suck.
2 Beautiful|lies

ehhh! [23 Oct 2003|03:44pm]
just htought id tell you steph! i was minding my OWN business sweeping the floor and i looked down and there was this cute lil spider on my shirt ... i knocked it off, and picked it up with the dustpan and took the lil guy outside where he belongs! but it scared me.. lol, and i dont wanna end up wtih a not so innocent spier scar like my favorite person.. 'liz'
3 Beautiful|lies

Well steph [18 Oct 2003|11:26am]
[ mood | cold ]
[ music | punk rock love-- causualties ]

As i told you when we started this john gets into my shit, i guess he did his weekly (lets say hes a nice guy, monthly) visits though my journals and mail. and i just wanted to tell you, that anything you say in here, he can read it if he wnated to by going though my friends, or if you've ever connected with him, he could get into it the way he does mine. I promise he wont hesitate to tell anyone anthing you write, well he might for you.. cause yall are friends, but i did something ungodly to him to make him hate me so. so anyhow, just thought id tell you.

anyways, last night was fun. till i got home because amber spent the night again. My mom invited her. she hung out with aaron & his friends because i went to sleep. i only went to sleep because we were just sitting there not even talking and it was boring ya know? lol, whatever.

1 Beautiful|lies

[07 Oct 2003|08:45pm]
lemonylimeade: who is this?
ima davantzis: chicken chicken, chicken head
lemonylimeade: i find it funny that you can tell liz she's too scared to say something to someone's face, but yet.. you can't tell me who you are? does this seem a little.. hypocritical to you?
ima davantzis: lol no ill tell u who i am
ima davantzis: Kristin
ima davantzis: This is Leanne
lemonylimeade: leanne who?
ima davantzis: Russell
lemonylimeade: i dont know a leanne russell, and neither does liz. so try again.
ima davantzis: lol umm ......
ima davantzis: 7th grade i was in ur class
lemonylimeade: there were lots of kids in my 7th grade class. none that i remember being named leanne. unless you're the kid with the short spiky blond hair, in which case i didnt think your last name was russell.
ima davantzis: no i had long brown hair at the time, and i was a cross dresser........
ima davantzis: now i have short spiky hair
lemonylimeade: so what's your deal w/ liz?
ima davantzis: nothing really
ima davantzis: just dont want her to judge people she doesnt know
lemonylimeade: riight.. so, that's why you called her a poser even though you don't know her? because.. you dont want her to judge people?
ima davantzis: yes.......showing her its dumb to do that, cuz i dont know her at all. but yet she thinks she knows my friends enough to call them posers
lemonylimeade: hm. wouldn't your point have been better proven if you had just said something to the effect of, "hey, i heard you said such and such about my friends. why?" instead of trying to pick a fight?
lemonylimeade: i seriously don't get people. always wanting to talk big and bad and pick fights with people. no one ever wants to be civil these days. sheesh.
ima davantzis: im not pickin a fight lol
ima davantzis: i dont fight
lemonylimeade: so.. what do you call name-calling, and generally being rude? common courtesy? i think not.
ima davantzis: lol i was doing the same, like showing her that it doesnt do anything to judge.
ima davantzis: it was childish
lemonylimeade: who told you that she called them posers anyway? you just heard their side of the story; liz said she never called them posers, and the only person she told was jesse, and that was just giving jesse her opinion. there's nothing wrong with giving someone your opinion.
ima davantzis: no b.4 all of this about the sXe jesse told me she called her a poser
lemonylimeade: *shrug* i don't even know why im getting in all this. i just know that it's stupid when you IM someone and start off being rude, and not tell them who you are. you might wanna work on that next time you pick a fight with someone.
ima davantzis: lol once again i wasnt pickin a fight
lemonylimeade: so what do you call name-calling and being rude, just out of curiousity?
ima davantzis: you wouldnt get it
ima davantzis: im not callin her names now
1 Beautiful|lies

HA this is realy great [25 Aug 2003|10:11pm]
i heard some intersting news today. i dont really believe it tho. maybe im naive. i want him to tell me me. then ill believe it. YOU TELL ME. tell me u never cared about me for anymore then a friend john. tell my taht you where with me only to make james more mad. only for lack of options. tell me u never cared. tell me I AGAVE U EVERYTHING I HAD only because u wanted to get back at james. tell me that. and mean it. tell me in person. cause i dont think u can do it. i really dont. tell me u fucked that girl the day before we broke up. cause i believed u agaisnt shane and erica. tell me that when u said "i could never use someone excailly not you" tell me that was a lie. tell me you only used me john. say it.if u can tell stiz that, admit it to james. tell me. why cant u tell me??? im sure u told baily already. its cool though, really i dont know what i ever saw in you. you cant treat people like that. i told bailey in the beginning, dont hurt john. damnit. i feel for that girl. cause u manage to hurt everyone. whatever john. im over it. and you one. u succeeded in whatever u tryed to do with me. you used me. and i feel into it.. i let you. and thats my fault. so you know, whatever right? not like u care, not like this even said anything at all to you, not like u will ever care about anything but urself.

JOSH IMA DO IT!! [31 Jul 2003|09:27pm]
I'm a person just like you
But I've got better things to do
Then sit around and fuck my head
Hang out with the living dead
Snort white shit up my nose
Pass out at the shows
I don't even think about speed
That's something I just don't need

I've go the straight edge

I'm a person just like you
But I've got better things to do
Then sit around and smoke dope
'Cause I know that I can cope
I laugh at the thought of eating ludes
Laugh at the thought of sniffing glue
Always gonna keep in touch
Never want to use a crutch

I've got the straight edge
-minor threat


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