Dazed*N*Amazed's Blurty Entries [entries|friends|calendar]

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CJ's Leaving.... [17 Aug 2003|10:17pm]
[ mood | depressed ]
[ music | "Bring The House Down" ~Taylor and Tori Thompson ]

You helped me laugh, you dried my tears, because of you, I have no fears. Together we live, together we grow, teaching each other what we must know. You came in my life, and I was blessed. I love you, CJ, you are the best. Release my hand, and say good-bye. Please my friend, don't you cry. I promise you this, it's not the end. 'Cause like I said, you're my best friend.

"I realize that soon we'll be apart. My mind understands, please explain it to my heart."

4 days til CJ leaves


Catch A Falling Star

Hell: Day #1 [11 Aug 2003|06:23pm]
[ mood | tired ]
[ music | "For All Time" ~Soluna ]

My first day of band camp was today. *groans* Why I go back to band every year is beyond me, because I do nothing but complain about it. Anyway, today was the first day. It wasn't too bad... wait, yes it was.

First, I didn't get to sleep until around 3 am because I was nervous, so my stomach was queezy. Then, I woke up, and only got to eat half a piece of toast for breakfast. My carpool arrived late, and so we were late for band. NOT a good thing, let me tell ya. After that things really flew, until lunch rolled around. I realized I had forgotten to pack my grapes, which I was really looking forward to, so all I had for lunch was a sandwhich and pudding. Needless to say, I was still hungry. Then we went onto the feild to learn drill, and that was a pain. We had gotten drill sheets, but they were wrong, and so we couldn't use them. Then Mrs Nick, our instructor, was in a mood today and so every little thing she did wrong she made it sound like such a big deal!

Grrr, I hate band...why did I go back to it again?

I'm going to miss Brandon the next couple of weeks. We're hardly going to be able to see each other, because I have band and he has soccer. *sigh* Why do I have to love him this much?

Random thought: My throat hurts....

Well, I'm off. I think I'm going to take a nap...

Catch A Falling Star

99 Cent Underwear.... [09 Aug 2003|07:44pm]
[ mood | angry ]
[ music | "You Are The One" ~Jordan McCoy (American Juniors) ]

I could kill my sister. She has no idea how much I wanted this underwear. Seriously, I mean...who would turn down underwear for 99 cents a pair? You can't get a price like that ANYWHERE! But no...CJ didn't want to look at it because it wasn't for her. Grr...I really hate her sometimes.

But yeah, after we looked at this great 99 CENT UNDERWEAR, we went to my cousin, Amanda's, graduation party! That was pretty fun, except there was like nobody there. But with the few people that were there that I knew, we had a great time.


Ok, yanno how I was saying what I was going to get engraved on Brandon's anniversary gift? Well, that's going to cost too much. So now I don't know WHAT to put on it! I was thinking something along the lines of this...(remember, it's a pic of me and him, with me on his lap)

Love; seek and you shall find
you are the one I wanna love
always there to see me smilin'...
OR (my favorite)
There Is A Love For Everyone


Hmm...I thought I had more to say...but I guess not, haha.

Catch A Falling Star

Eewww... [09 Aug 2003|12:37pm]
You should date Tony. He acts like an idiot, but
it's obvious through his songs about ex
girlfriend Chelsea that he gets very attached
in realtionships. Awww...

Which Member Of Mest Should You Date?(out of jere, tony, matt)
brought to you by Quizilla
Catch A Falling Star

** IMPORTANT NOTICE!! ** [09 Aug 2003|12:21pm]
[ mood | aggravated ]
[ music | "Didn't I Blow Your Mind?" ~New Kids On The Block ]


As most of you know, efanfiction.net is closing downt their MUSIC section on the website. I have decided to once again switch websites, so I am now posting my stories on http://www.soupfiction.net My penname on that website is also DrEaMz so you can look me up there.

Thank you!

Catch A Falling Star

[06 Aug 2003|12:53pm]
[ mood | angry ]
[ music | "One Step Closer" ~American Juniors ]

Ugh...I have band pictures today. I don't wanna go... I don't know how to do my hair, or what make-up to wear...and frankly I'm just not in the mood to get out of my pajamas right now, haha.

Last weekend, I was at my friend's house for her birthday, and she straightened my hair with her straightening iron. I loved it so much, I was so excited about it. So I was telling my mom how I wanted to get one so I could straighten my hair for my band pictures. Well she was telling me how at the beauty shop where she works, they have this stuff that's only $5 and it will keep my hair straight for around 3 months. Of course, I was ecstatic and let her put it on me. She did it last night, and let me tell you...I don't like it. My hair is straigtER....but it's not as straight as I like it.

So now I'm all bummed because my hair isn't going to look the way I had planned, and my pictures are going to be ruined, and Brandon isn't gonna like them, and I am not gonna like them, and then the rest of my summer will be ruined.

Wow my imagination runs...

My friend Stepfanie is having a party tonight at her house for her 17th birthday. I still have to get her a card or something. As weird as it sounds...I wanna do something bad. Like, get drunk or something. I don't wanna do drugs, that's for sure. But I wanna have a drink, just to feel what it's like.

Maybe tonight I'll be bad...

Catch A Falling Star

Weee!! [01 Aug 2003|09:13pm]
You are DORY!
What Finding Nemo Character are You?

brought to you by Quizilla
Catch A Falling Star

....Doo Doo Doo Doo.... [01 Aug 2003|01:58pm]
[ mood | dorky ]
[ music | "Do You Love Me?" ~American Juniors ]

I don't want to go to band today... I know it's only for 3 hours, but it's supposed to rain, just like yesterday. And let me tell you, when you're stuck inside learning a 17-count dance... 3 hours is a loooooong time. I hope we don't have practice...I heard that we're just going to go get fitted for our uniforms, and then Mrs. Nick is going to dismiss us.

*crosses fingers*

I'm really excited about guard this year. There is only 18 of us, so we're all closer now than the guard was last year at the end of the season. And we're good... We've got our first song done already, and about half the second. I get the feeling we're going to have a good season.


I have so much going on tomorrow. I have to go to my family reunion at about 11, and help my dad and my family set up the food and whatnot. Then I have to leave early, about 3 o'clock, to go to my best friend's surprise birthday party across town. And now I feel bad because I had told my boyfriend I would go to his cousin's birthday party with him, but I had to cancel for this surprise party. I hope he's not too mad. I don't think he would be... I mean, this party is for my best friend, and I don't even know his cousin.

I still have to go shopping for her birthday present...EEK! I think I know what I'm getting her though: picture frames and lip gloss, and maybe some bath stuff, if I can find it.

Hopefully she'll like it! *crosses fingers*

Catch A Falling Star

AAHHH! [27 Jul 2003|02:03am]
[ mood | nervous ]
[ music | None ]

everyone says one good scare is good for you.... )

Catch A Falling Star

Random Thoughts... [26 Jul 2003|05:11pm]
[ mood | hyper ]
[ music | "I'd Do Anything" ~Simple Plan ]

Hmm, I've got the house to myself right now. Funny...I'm getting paid $4 an hour to babysit, yet the kid isn't even here, haha. She's at some birthday party. WOOT WOOT!! Haha...I like this job, haha.

Brandon is coming over in a bit. I'm not sure when. I hope soon...I mean, I'm at my cousin's house, nobody is home...and he's allowed to be here. HOW COOL IS THAT? hehehe


Hehe, It's me and Brandon's 11 month anniversary today!
Happy Anniversary, Baby!

You know what that means? Next month is our 1 year anniversary. Weee! I'm so excited. I'm getting him a silver picture frame, and I'm going to have ...some people leave footprints in your heart... engraved on it. Sound good? I hope so... I don't know what he's gettng me, (obviously), but I know he's taking me out to dinner, but I don't know where. Oh well. As long as I'm with him...that's all that matters.

Ok, Jordyn is calling me, I best be off!

Catch A Falling Star

Babysitting... [25 Jul 2003|10:18pm]
[ mood | aggravated ]
[ music | "Where Is The Love?" ~Black Eyed Peas ]

Ugh...as much as I love babysitting for my cousin, because she pays wel...her daughter is really spoiled. I mean, ugh. She's a pain, and she has no manners.

Ugh...I just wish she would go to sleep. It's quarter after 10, and she's wide awake. And then she tells me that she wants to take a bath. So I'm thinking, "Yes, she can play and I can relax." But noooo, she wants me up there the WHOLE time. That wouldn't be so bad...if she didn't take 45 minute baths!

Ugh...I think I'm going to go insane. Hopefully the movie she's watching now will keep her occupied for a while.

*crosses fingers*

Well, Jordyn is calling for me.

Catch A Falling Star

[24 Jul 2003|06:23pm]
[ mood | flirty ]
[ music | "I Must Not Chase The Boys" ~Play ]

I have no idea why I'm in a flirty mood...but I am. I feel like going out somewhere and FLIRTING!! Ok...I just sounded like a big ditz. But it's the truth. I haven't flirted in a long time...and I miss it, haha.

Well, nothing really exciting has happened in my life...except that my brother is actually listening to me while I babysit him.

I know, I'm shocked too, haha.

Oh!! And my website has gotten some MAJOR revamping in the past couple of days...GO CHECK IT OUT!!

I think that's it for now...it's time for dinner!

Catch A Falling Star

News Flash [21 Jul 2003|08:01pm]
[ mood | crushed ]

News Flash:

One of my cats, Squeakers, got hit by a car not too long ago.

I'm sorry to say he didn't make it....

Catch A Falling Star

Boyfriends...*Sigh* [21 Jul 2003|06:30pm]
[ mood | contemplative ]
[ music | "Three Mississippi" ~Terri Clark ]

Boyfriends confuse me. Sometimes, I just don't get them. Or maybe it's that girls really are difficult. I have yet to decide. But they think they're doing something to make you happy, but it makes you mad instead. They think that by lying or making up an excuse they're saving you from heartbreak, but really it just makes it worse.

So who's at fault?

I have yet to decide, myself. I was put into that position last night. Me and Brandon were on the Ferris Wheel at Harborfest, because I wanted to ride it. After we got on and started going, he made it clear that he really didn't want to ride in the first place.

Why didn't he just tell me that? Did he lie so that I would be happy, even though I'm mad that he lied? Or am I just being stubborn and not appreciating what he did for me?

So while we were on the Ferris Wheel, I told him I wanted to climb the rock wall, which cost $3, before we left. He told me that he didn't want to climb it, because he's trying to save his money for next month - our 1 year anniversary. I understood, and said ok. Don't you know that after we got off, he goes and buys and Elephant ear, which cost him $4 dollars, and then a piece of taffy, for another $1. So he spent $5 dollars on himself.

Was I wrong to get mad? Or was he wrong to lie to make me not so hurt?

I found out later that the Elephant Ear was for his mom, and she was paying him back. And granted the taffy was only a buck. But, for some reason I'm still a little upset. Why couldn't he just tell me that he didn't want to climb the wall, instead of making up an excuse about saving money?

Maybe I'm being just a little dramatic. But it makes me think...

If he lied last night, to make me feel better, even though it backfired...how many other things has he lied about?

Catch A Falling Star

[14 Jul 2003|12:03pm]
[ mood | aggravated ]
[ music | "Grandpa (Tell Me 'Bout The Good Old Days)" ~The Judds ]

My brother is driving me crazy. I can't stand it. I just wanna....ugh, hit him or something, haha.

I went to Brandon's last night. By the way he kissed me...he missed me, haha. I seriously don't think he's ever kissed me like that before. I don't know how to explain it, or else I would. And it was nice, because he promised me he would tape my favorite show, American Juniors, and he didn't. So all night he was making it up to me, haha. He gave me a full body massage...*sigh* That was nice.

I still feel bad about now calling him on Friday like I told him I would. He had a soccer tournament, and he's always telling me I'm his good luck charm. And then I forgot to call him, just to find out that the team played like crap. I was thinking "Oh God, now I feel bad."

Yanno what me and my friend, Jericho, found out? Yanno that AOL buddy SmarterChild? Well, you can leave people with AOL/AIM messages! So me and Jericho, who never get to talk, leave each other messages, kind of like an answering machine! All you have to do is IM SmarterChild and type in Write a message and then he'll give you instructions from there. It's pretty cool....

Catch A Falling Star

Sandusky, Ohio [12 Jul 2003|09:55pm]
[ mood | tired ]
[ music | "Skin Deep" ~No Secrets ]

Hmm, I don't even know where to start.

Me and CJ left for Buger King (the meeting place) at around 11:30, and made a few stops along the way. We got there, ate lunch, and the whole crew (the Dance Company) took off for the road at about 1:30. Everything was going fine, until about 3:00 when it started to pour so hard CJ couldn't see. So there we were, in downtown Cleveland, and we couldn't see the people we were following. Great huh?

We got to the resort at about 5ish...I think. I dunno. Anyway, we checked in, and the place was really nice. I got a lot of cool pictures, which I will be posting on my website soon (hopefully).

The rest of the week was pretty dull, in all honesty. It rained 5 out of the 6 days we were there, and if we weren't in the theater watching the dance competition, we were in the car driving from one place to another.

Me and CJ went to Cedar Point Thursday night. We were only there for like 3 hours, but because there was like nobody there, we rode everything we wanted to. I won a stuffed "patrick" doll from Sponge Bob Square Pants and I got a cup that says "Cedar Point" on it.

Other than that...yeah, that's all I did all week, haha.

Gotta go, maybe I'll update again later.

Catch A Falling Star

GOODBYE! [07 Jul 2003|09:32am]
[ mood | anxious ]
[ music | "Put A Little Love In Your Heart" ~American Juniors ]

Ah! I'm going to Sandusky, Ohio, today! EEEE

Don't miss me too much!

Ok, yeah, we have to go, so I'm going to go!

Catch A Falling Star

GGGRRR!! [05 Jul 2003|09:35pm]
[ mood | angry ]
[ music | "Front Porch Looking In" ~Lonestar ]

GRR!! I hate my computer....ok, so I just wrote out this big thing explaining my weekend thus far, and it didn't go through. so i'll make it short....

I went to family first, had lots of fun
Saw fireworks that sucked
And then met more of Brandon's family at a BBQ

Exciting ain't it?

Catch A Falling Star

[02 Jul 2003|11:36pm]
[ mood | pensive ]
[ music | None ]

I was at Brandon's last night, and he.....hang on, let me back up.

So me, Brandon, and Nate went to Andy's Pub on Sunday to play pool. While we were there, American Pie was playing on the TV. Well, I have never seen that movie, but I know that it's like...all sex and crap, haha. Anyways, we started watching it right as the one dude was fingering a pie. Well me, being sarcastic, put my hand on my hip and was like "That's not how you do it!"

....and I think I've told you this before. Oh well.

So Brandon came over to my house on Monday, and we were talking and he goes "Yanno how you were joking yesterday?" and I was like "Yeah..." Well then he goes, "Have you ever considered that?"

Well the truth is...I have. Like when we're making out or something, and I'm really turned on. I usually have to say stop, and take a breather so I don't get out of control. Because, yanno, even though I know how far I want to let myself go, sometimes you're in the moment and everything seems right, and...yanno. So I usually stop myself before I get too bad. Well that's usually when I think about it.

So I told him I have, and we just kinda left it at that.

Well then yesterday (Tuesday), I was at his house, and we were talking and he goes "Yanno what we talked about yesterday?" and I was like "Yeah..." Well he kinda looks down, then looks up and goes "Would you like to try it sometime?"

I was blown away. I honestly didn't know what to say. I just kinda shrugged, as if saying "I don't know...maybe" and then I changed the subject. But I mean, I want to, but not yet. I'm just not ready. Because pretty soon he'll be asking for sex, and that's just...no.

I don't know what to do.

Do I tell him yes?
Do I tell him no?
Do I tell him maybe?
Maybe I should just forget it and hope he forgets, too...


Catch A Falling Star

Umm...Yeah... [30 Jun 2003|08:50pm]
[ mood | blank ]
[ music | "Good Morning Beautiful" ~Steve Holy ]

Wow, it's been a looooong time since I've updated. I don't remember the last time I did, so I'll just start rambling on...

Saturday my friends Tara and Jericho slept over. It was great fun. We hadn't seen each other in like 2-3 months, so we stayed up half the night catching up on everything we've missed. I really miss them sometimes. I miss not having them right around the block. Now they're a 15 minute drive, and it's a pain.

Sunday I had a couple more friends over. Brandon, Nathan, Tara, and Jericho all helped me and my family paint the back apartment. We only got like 2 rooms done, one of them only primed. The room that did get painted all the way has to be redone because Tara can't paint, haha. We got lots of paint on the carpet, so my mom is pissed because she has to replace those carpets now.

Oops. *grins sheepishly*

Sunday evening Brandon and Nate helped my dad move an armoir from the back apartment to my room. It's really heavy, but those buff guys did it, haha. They broke a door on the way to my room, but my dad can fix that.

Sunday night Brandon, Nate, and I all went to play pool at Andy's Pub. It was great fun. I found out I suck at pool, but that's ok. The pub had American Pie playing while we were there, so we watched that while we played. The part where the kid is fingering the pie, I was like, "That's not how you do it!"

Both Nate and Brandon gave me wierd looks, haha. But that's ok, because they knew I was kidding.

Nothing else has really happened. I've just been hanging around the house, because my internet was being all screwey. I've been working on my flag work for guard, and hanging out with Brandon. He's getting his wisdom teeth pulled Wednesday, and I'm leaving for Cedar Point on Monday. That means it'll be over 2 weeks until I can make out with him. It sucks, haha.

I just found out my friend, Sher, is a cutter. Meaning she cuts her wrists and arms. I'm worried about her. Especially since she and her boyfriend just broke up. She ODed today on pain killers, and she cuts her wrists. I really care about her, even though we're just online friends. I'm worried, and scared...

*is nervous*

Hmm...I might update later, if I have more to say. For now...

Catch A Falling Star

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