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Thursday, September 11th, 2003
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5:02 pm - oh the wind and the rain
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it's too sunny and lovely out. it's ruining my crappy mood. i just want one thing to go spectacularly well and then i'll be happy, restored. departure to france maybe pushed back because of the idiocy of my future employers, oh joy. oh well, okay.
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(comment on this)
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| Sunday, September 7th, 2003
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11:40 pm - oooh fancy
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i'm actually adding shit to this, like icons and a color scheme i can stand, as though i may use it in the future. maybe i will, who knows. the icon, if anyone ever sees it and cares, is a hans bellmer photograph. hans bellmer was a surrealist artist in germany, around the 30s. his work is really gripping, in my opinion, in that it's both painfully beautiful and grotesque. his work centered around these large dolls of adolescent women which he would make, manipulate and pose, then photograph and tint. it was said that his work was a critique of nazi germany and its emphasis on so-called physical perfection. despite that, there is obviously a lot more to be said about it, especially his fixation on women, the female form, and the effects of the gaze on said form. interestingly, he was a devoted husband and took careful cafe of his wife, who died of illness long before him.
i have no reason for sharing all that, except i really really love hans bellmer's work.
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(comment on this)
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1:14 am - brush yourself off and try again
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okay here is a summary of my previously-mentioned deleted entry (the irony of the deletion being that i thought to myself, just before i hit the update button, that i should copy the entry just in case)
-i have another weblog which i will not mention here. i have no idea what the distinction between this and that are, except that the other weblog actually has some readers
-i am getting good at taking rejection well. this is important because, as a writer, it is a necessary skill.
-i am a lazy person, who was lucky enough to do well in school without much (or any) outside work. because of this lack of self-discipline, i have trouble getting work done now. i need some schedule, but find it impossible to impose structures on myself.
-this will hopefully cease to be a problem in france, where my computer access with be limited and i will be forced to work more efficiently and on a schedule. i think.
-after researching universities in SW france, i definitely will be auditing a class or two this fall, and hopefully enrolling fulltime spring semester. this has the added bonus of letting me change my carte de sejour to a student one, thus avoiding the whole annoying renewal process
-i am terribly impatient to go to france. i wish i was there right this very second.
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(comment on this)
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1:12 am - anger!
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i hate blurty. i just wrote a nice little entry and it's gone, lost int he mists of cyberspace. tragic, really
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(comment on this)
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| Saturday, August 9th, 2003
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2:58 am
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maybe i should use this as a journal for france. but my god, i hate the sort of people who are obsessed with their online journals. i am a very unpleasant girl.
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(comment on this)
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| Friday, May 30th, 2003
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4:15 pm
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this will be full of lies and half truths. there's no better way to use the internet, is there?
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(comment on this)
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4:03 pm
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