| Well... |
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| 08:11pm 01/07/2005 |
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Looking back now..The person I was when I made this..It makes me giggle. It's been so long. I used to love to be shady..Dark and mysteriouse. Listen to nothing but Korn and cut myself and giggle when the wounds stung. Yes, I was stupid. Yes I was immature. Yes, it was cliche. But when I had fun....I had fun. And I loved it.
Today I am even more angsty. Now I love Placebo..boys who look like girls and such. Re-enventing myself never gets old. I wear pounds of glitter. I have a new boyfriend. I am not a virging. I still don't drink or smoke. I enjoy life. I enjoy up-beat Emo tunes.
And dear Jesus, I love korn.
-7arah |
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| Hola |
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| 01:08pm 21/04/2005 |
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mood:  amused music: Placebo-my sweet prince.
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Well hello then. no time spend waisted right? I still update that Xanga. All the time. There is alot, ALOT of drama in my life right now. What do you expect from a 15 year old girl? Everyone that meets me assumes I am older than what I am. I find it amusing. I look young, but I am just really fucking cool.
The old me is showing through a little, I was deeply upset when Head left Korn, and you can consider me somewhat scarred from the whole thing. I don't listen to them too much anymore, I just find it amaizingly upsetting. On several levels. I don't know, maybe it's because I heard them for the first time when I was 7, and I remember it. Maybe it's because They have been my favorite band since I was 9. Maybe, it's because If it weren't for the lyrics of Jonathan Houseman Davis, I would be dead right now. I don't know for sure. But, I don't listen to them often anymore, Now I am in love with Placebo. Don't get my wrong, Korn will always be my favorite band, but electronic=good music.
Man, I have recently had my first relationship with a girl. It failed misserably, ofcoarse, but...I don't know. Everything is so confusing. I have been the way that I am for years and years and I still don't understand my own desires or attraction. The laws of attraction are simple. Nomatter what, you lose. Now I am dating Josh, who I love and am very very happy with. I just wish I knew what I wanted. Maybe I don't need to, maybe all I need is time. Time, that in this current world, we don't have.
Always.
-7arah |
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| HOLA! |
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| 08:17pm 10/02/2005 |
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mood:  accomplished music: Bubblegun-Placebo
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I AM STILL UPDATING FREQUENTLY ON WWW.XANGA.COM/INSANEPYROKORNFREAK
K, well, Things are better/worse at school, depending on what exactly you are talking about. My grades are good, so that is cool. I am still dating Jared. That's good right? Not that anyone ever reads this, but just incase you do, xanga is a 100000000000000000000000000 times better than blurty or lj. You have so many more options, and fucking blogrings that are set up differently...cooler....way coooler......
Okay well, other than that, I suck. Not really, well...never mind. I have 3 journals now, the only one I ever really update is my xanga, I update it almost every day. SO if you want to know what's going on, check it. And check it good.
~The gang is pretty much back together, like....compleatly. We had nod been friends really, for a while, about a year ago wahen relationships/drugs took their toll. I think we are all recovered from that. Also, we have grown up a bit, and we are a little smarter now. It is funny to think that just 2 years ago, things were so insanely different. Even my writing compleatly sucked. But I tried, god knows I tried. And I was so care free, we all were. It's weird almost, I was very weird too, very VERY obsessed with Korn. They are still my very favorite band--ever--But I love others too. I love alot, ALOT of music.
I think I have a part in the school play, one of the three atleast. I'm not exactly sure yet. I'll keep you posted.
be true, be a dumbass.
Never The Less
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| 12:01pm 24/10/2004 |
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Jeeze it's been so long since I have updated this bitch. ANywhoze, I am still with Jared, but we are haveing some little shit problems right now...Not just with the relationship, just....in genreral. I fucking hate high-school, and I really thought I wouldn't. And I didn't...Until last week when everything went wrong. My friends.."friends" hate me and treat me like shit, and do retarded things to me. ugh. fuck that.
The Haunted house, at the fire dept. is SO AWESOME..I am proud to work there. People are saying it's alot better than the one in evansville. And it should be, we worked so hard on it. We have made 7 people piss themselves in three nights. Crazy, and it is really fun too. Last night I walked outside and dude killed me, normally I wouldn't of cared but i had to fall in a puddle of water and my ass was all wet, so I yelled at him and told him next time to kill me somewhere dry. I think it pissed him off, oh-well.
This bitch alana was there friday so I told joe to really fuck with her becouse I hate her, and him being the wonderful sweet old dude he is got and inch away from her with the chainsaw, (and we DON'T take the chains off) it was a sweet experience standing in the rech room hearing her scream for her life. God, I want to hear it again.
This new house is haunted, really. Like, it fucks with me all the time. At first I was all scared, but lately it kinda makes me feel safer. It's weird, It will do things like turn my stereo off and on while i'm asleep and wake me up. It also turned on a lamp for me. I was all freaked out but I think I am getting used to it. Why can't we all just live together in peace?
Well, it's sunday and I should be going to church, but i think i'm just gunna go back to bed. Sorry God.
Never The Less,
-7arah Ann |
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| hey hey hey... |
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| 11:02am 07/06/2004 |
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mood:  artistic music: umm, some shit on the radio
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Well, Okay so it's been like forever since i've updated htis thing...i'm still updatreing the xanga...
www.xanga.com/insanepyrokornfreak
frequently...k well...point is. Yeah, there isn't one. I've been pretty useless this summer. LOL. We're supposed to be moveing soon. My grandmother died and we inherited her house. It's been a painfully long process. It's cazy. It's stressed my mom out so bad that no one can STAND to be around her. And it's annoying. Umm, oh yeah i lost my virginity....lol. Cool. I love Jared.
Peace
-7arah
KORNS GREATEST HITS OUT THIS SUMMER BOO FUCKIN YAH |
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| Oh fuck |
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| 05:55pm 25/01/2004 |
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mood:  annoyed music: "ass itch" By KoRn
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well, Not like anyone ever reads this mofo anyway...but incase soeone is to stop by, heres a quickie...update that is.
~Well, Bethany officailly moved..*tear*...I miss her.
Friends can be a major pain in the ass....and sex is retarded...thankyou...goodnight
-7arah
http://www.xanga.com/insanepyrokornfreak
Peace |
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| WANG BROS |
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| 08:10pm 19/12/2003 |
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Yo........hey people....wassup
? Not much here....not much ever happens....I've been quite sick...but I think i'm good now. Yeah.
I LOVE JARED....FUKKA'S...man. Yanno what I'm gunna do when I turn 18? MARTI GRAS.... HELL YEAH....
Man...I was thinkin...I want an animal constume.. A purple one...Yanno? w/ a furry head...But i want the body to be covered in purple sequents...yeah...I think it would be awesome....Peice
-7arah |
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| Woah |
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| 07:28pm 27/11/2003 |
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mood: accomplished music: "Let's Do This Now" by KoRn
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Man....It's been a while....Mainly becouse I started useing another weblog community...(Xanga) and I've been there for a long time now....I decided to change becouse most of my people had a Xanga...and well...yeah. So anyway...If ya wanna check that out...It's WWW.XANGA.COM/INSANEPYROKORNFREAK yeah
So I have a new Boyfriends now...Jared...yeah been that way fro about 3 months.....
I am STILL a really BIG KoRn fan...(Understatement) and the new CD KICKS MAJOR ASS....peice...
-7arah |
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| 02:56pm 28/06/2003 |
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mood: annoyed music: "Dirty" by KoRn.
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Okay....i'm not going to go into details. I wnet to holiday world....woot....stayed at Kristin's dad's....and Kristin is mad at me righ now...I think.... But o-well....Um...chealsea my lon-lost friend came up...she just left...I changed my layout...Dusty and Kristin are together(goin out) woot.....I feel so....occomplished. And bad...I gues that's just part of being a "Bad Influence" huh? later..... |
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| okay... |
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| 10:00pm 22/06/2003 |
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mood:  blah music: THE TESTICLES SONG
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Well...today i hung out with my posse...Bethany and Kristin...woot...we wanted to make some jello...but we had to wait until Bethany's mom left...so we killed some time by wlaking to minute mart and getting something to drink...so afterwords...we walked over by houchens and discovers sme simi truck was unlocked...so after fucking around with it we were like..."Let's steal shit" so we stole like 9 astrays from dairy queen a drivway reflecter a cricket basket thing, some blades from a broken fan..a chain and two lightbubls...i know baby shit but hey...anyway then we put them in the back of the semi and wlaked back to Bethany's and made jello...screwed around on her computer...put a red-dread in my head (woot that rymed)...and then why the jello wsa getting hard (physicly not horny) we went to get all the shit we stole...then...we ate our shitty ass Jello that taisted really fucking bad...wel...then we went to Kristins to hang out for a while...then Bethany and me walked to halfway....then to out seperate houses...Wel...damn i really want a Xanga....so i cna have a KoRn background...but i have so many entries...my friend sad we can copy and paste themm all....but thta would take a while...so...yeah....Well...Later |
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| GODDAMN |
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| 11:28pm 21/06/2003 |
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mood: aggravated music: "CHI" by KORN
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welll...okay...let me start at the begining...okay..well....see...Yesterday me & Kristin hung out like usual...ad then i spent the night at her house. We had fun....we lit maches...ate shit...and decorated her folder... Also...we found this like 1940's Bic lighter...and oh my god...THE FLAME WAS SO FUCKING BIG...oh my god it was funny...it was like the ALTAMATE CRACK LIGHTER.....haha....anyway...we went to sleep at like 4:30...and woke up at about noon.....or kristin dide...i woke up at about 8...and then layed around and thought...well.....she got up...so we went outside and jammed...and then..we got dressed and went to the Brook...then we hung out at her house 4 a while when we got back...and then we called ashley...so we wound up going over to asley's and hangin out...well it was fun...we sat around by the pool 4 a while...then we went swimming too. We were makeing waves...ahh god it was fun. Wel....my dad came to get Kristin and me and we talked about Holoday world and weather or not i could go with Kristin..and then fuckin got on the food converstation...and my dad's was like "You ate all the cereal blah blah blah" and i was like "yeah becouse we didn't have anyhting else" and he was like "youre mother cooked supper" and i was like "Yeah and i didn't like it that crap" and he was like "Blah you should wlak to the store" and i was like "WTF?" I MEAN MOM WON'T GET OFF HER ASS AND GO TO THE FUCKING STORE TO GET ANY GODDAMN FOOD...SO...SHIT...YOU KNOW? and i was like "Why don't you go to the store?" and he was like "That's not my Job" and it's ahh...LIKE IT'S THE 13 YEAR-OLD'S JOB TO WLAK ACCROSS TOWN TO THE FUCKIN GROCERY STORE AND BUTY FOOD BECOUSE NO ONE WILL GET OFF THERE LAZY ASS AND DO IT so i said "Iyt's not mine either...." and so he was like "Youre pissing me off" and i was just...BITCH...GOD YOURE BEING SO FUCKING RETARDED....DAMNIT SHUT THE FUCK UP...WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SMOKEING MAN...GODDAMN... so i said "Whatever.." and he was like yeah. SO when i got home i was eating some rice and he was like "Andrea youre doughter thinks oyu should go to the store becouse her and her friends have no food here" and i was like WHAT THE FUCK? i said " WHAT? WHEN DID MY FRIENDS COME INTO THIS?" SO I GOT MY ASS CHEWED...AND THEN...MY DAD WAS LIKE "if youre the last one eating you put the food up" and then i was REALLY pissed off just becouse he said that to piss me of...well...it worked...and then my mom was like "Don't worry sweatie i'll put the food up"and i was like...wow she's being nice...but then she said "I'd rather do it than have it done half-assed" and i was like I HATE YOU.....BOTH......GOD I HATE YOU ALL YOU ARE SO FUCKING IN-SENSITIVE AND IN-SUP[PORTIVE TO EVERYTHING...................... and i jsut started balling ...so my dad walked in and was like "Why are you crying?" and i was jus t"leave me alone" and he kept bugging the shit outa me and i was like "GO AWAY I HATE YOU BOTH" so he left me alone...then i took a shower and listened to Issues...blew off some steam...I HATE THEM |
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| WOOOOOOOT |
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| 09:45pm 19/06/2003 |
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mood:  anxious music: CLOWN
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GUESS WHAT...I DOWNLOADED THE CLOWN VIDEO...yay...it only took me 3 hours and 20 someodd minuts.........well.. IT WAS WORTH IT. well...this morning...Beth called...and i woke up about 12 and the phone rang RIGHT after i woke up....man this KEEPS HAPINING....I HATE IT...it's so fucking weird...ooh it scares me...well...We talked...until i was like "I'll call you back i need to call Krisiitn" so i got off the phone with Bethany and called K and was like "Yo" so we tlaked for about 4 minuts and i'm all like "I DOWNLOADED THE CLOWN VIDEO" so she was gunna wlak over...then i called beth back but it was busy...So i had to ride with my mom real fast into town to get some food...anyway..after i got back i got in touch w/Bethany and i met her halfway...so we started wlaking to meet Kristin half way...and We were Behing the church and we were like "Let's be retarded" So we were standing by the door we smushed ourselfs against the wall and hwen she walked up we were like "Ya think she notices us?" it was SOO funny. So after that we walked to my place and wached the clown video 9000 times. hehe...i love it. Anyway....then we walked up to minute mart and got some dronks...I got a pepsi...woot..adn Tate was there. and he walked up and was like "Dide you guys walk" and we were like "Yeah" and he was like " want a ride" so he drove us to my place and chilled until i left for guard practice...and then when i got back from guard i went to Beth's were Kris and Beth were chillin and we sat around and talked..Then we walked Kristin home...sat around and jammed to Pinhead Gunpowder (awesome band) and talked...and bounced golfballs. Well...then Beth had to walk homme...so i walked with her and we tlaked until we got to Halfway..were we meet when we...well...meet...and then we both walked homme...so here i am...oh eyah by the way..LOOK AT MY ICON....WOOT...IT'S KORN.....IT'S THE BEST ICON EVER....WOOT...THANKS SO MUCH ...MAN I LOVE IT SOO MUCH... well....i'm seriously thinking about changeing my layout and Colors...this is pretty lame...man....if i knew how to work shit i'd make it ereally cool....but i don't...so...yeah...later |
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| Do do do do |
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| 09:39pm 18/06/2003 |
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mood: accomplished music: "Just For Now" by Feildy off Feily's dreams
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Wow..okay today i woke up and got online...talked to Dusty...got off...took a shower...went with mom to go to subway...went to Kristins we chilled there for a while...then walked to bethany's...Got on the church van and went to church...It was fun...they held this court thing on freakin Porn...I was for it...lol...anyway it was kinda weird...i feel rong at church...I mean...since i have my doubts and all...but i need to try and figure out what's going on with me. man...i am so confused. After church we were droped off at Beths by the church van..hung out...then Kristins mom gave me a ride home when she went to pick up Kristin. Woot...I am trying to download the "Clown" Vidio by KoRn....i think it's there best Song EVER and definantly there best Vidio. It's so great. Woot...later |
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| 10:48pm 17/06/2003 |
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Okay....i am so confused right now i just need to...let it out. So..here it goes. GOD......I HAVE A BAD HEADACHE..I AM PISSED OFF AND I DON'T KNOW WHY....MY ARM ICHES...........AND FIELDY IS A BAD RAPPER. man.....i falling into depression again....................i dunno how to stop it...i am about to break down into tears right now... i am grasping sanity but ti is slipping away from me. I am breaking down more and more every second. I want to rip my hair out and scream. Man....i was reaserching christianity and the bible. Man i am so confused..i dunno what i beleive in. I just...I dunno...nothing makes any sense..i tried to peice it together but...ahh...nevermind. But what scared me is...it says...Being homosexual is a big sin i could burn in hell for it. But....i;m not a homo...I'm Bi...But at the same time...that kinda means i am...I dunno what to do..I don't understand myself. This is my cry for help. I just...ahh....damnit....i can't explain the way i feel right now...god...why me? I used to be innocent...a good girl. Now i swear and smoke and do all sorts of shit i shouldn't...but i love it and i don't need to stop....ahh... need Jon't voice right now. Suicide seems so easy and a quick escape...but god...i just...oh....damnit. I just AHHHHHHHH FUCK... Just oh my....damnit...mixed emotions like crazy....i need....someone to talk to...i wish..Dusty would get on sometime.....i just need someone who understands how i take my strength in music...and knows what it's like. KoRn is just...when you listen...you can feel his pain..his anger his emotions...you can feel it and it's raw and you can let youre rage out just by understanding his words... he is God...sorry no offence to all you relig people but...without music...Wihtout KoRn i think i would have killed myself a long time ago. I need...someone right now...and i dunno who. well.....Ahh.Damnit.... |
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| 09:35pm 17/06/2003 |
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mood:  confused music: "Seven Nation Army" by the White Stripes
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I burnt my toungue eating a hot pocket. And i claim i am responsible. No matter what i do i always fuck up. Damn i suck |
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| FOSHIZZLE |
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| 09:41pm 16/06/2003 |
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mood: confused music: "Hallow Life" by KoRn its off untouchables but its good
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i know...second entry in the past 15 min...but i just had to say....man....nevermind. Fuck you.....Fuck him Fuck off go away you all suck. Bsides Bethany. I dunno.........i am insanely hyper........i dunno why....i'm confused as hell...i forgot what i was going to say......Shit Piss Fuck Ass Damn Bitch Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck FuckFuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck...Later |
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| 09:29pm 16/06/2003 |
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mood:  sad
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Emotions Emotions.....wow....suprizes.....i dunno what's going on. Intead of telling you about my boaring life and my boreing days i think i will just say....Emotions are confuseing. Everyday...treasers lay before me. But i can not take them...for they belong to someone else....the darkness is confuseing.....who/what i need/want how can i tell? I wish/hope/dream someday i can own such a beatiful jewl....such a mejestic being. What i would do........For what i love.....i'm confused....Iknow......what people would say if i did....words hurt...like a knife slashing into my back...but i don't care...not at all........i'm sad |
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| 10:56pm 15/06/2003 |
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mood:  awake music: "Dadday's little defect" by SugarCult
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Wow.....okay...were do i begin? Wel..i woke up friday morning at 12....an hour earlier than usual...but i was okay...i got dressed....put on makeup...and jewlry...i pakcked and i was ready only 30 min after i woke up. Well...we left home....dad gave me the "sex talk" on the way...woot. Well we got lost a few times....ate at shoneys...called Bills and found the way up the mountain to his place. When we pulled up...Heather and a bunch of other pples were chillin' at the place...i was like "WTF?" but i met them and they were all cool. So we stayed up until 2 am there talkin'...I don't even remember what about...but we talked...then finally i went in and went to bed...it took me like 8 hours to get to sleep...so i slept for about 2 hours. I woke up and got dressed in like 5 minuts...ate a bown of cereal....oh yeah....b4 we arrived at bills we went to oprey mills...the big mall...and i bought a KoRn shirt and a sugarcult..awesome. and two new pairs of VANS. Anyway...after eating cereal we (Heather and me) walked down to this dudes house and chilled. Listened to music and shit. Well...we went to the creeck a little later. We (heather and me) walked around in it. Well...we went back to dudes house and hung out. Listend to more music. FAST FAWORD later we talked outside until about 1 am and i burned 3 full packes of maches....haha. well went to bed...fell asleep okay....I woke up about 10 da next day....and got dressed we hung out 4 a while. They coocked out and we ate....some dudes played football. They listened to country music *VOMITS* I HATE COUNTRY,... well ...i left and it was a easy silent ride home. I may have skipped alot of stit but god i have other shit to get done so fuck off....j/k anyway gatta go .....Later |
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| 08:22pm 11/06/2003 |
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mood: blah music: Take a guess
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Don't ask.....i have no idia....well. Kristins not mad at me...she called me today. Kick ass...... well...blah..... Let me tell you about this really great band name Kristin and her sister came up with. When i get my drums i am supposed to be in Ahley and Kristins band...and April and Bethany's band too. Anyway... she came up wiht this name "The Irrepressible Crog-Drogans Jon-Green Philosiphy" Great huh? well.....theres a big long explanation...but i am way too lazy....Also....Aprils band will be named "Vegitarian Canables" Great huh? Well...i'm outta here....later
"Debbie" by SugarCult
Debbie was a lesbian yesterday Woe, oh, oh, ay, ay
Fighting all the way her mother's hair to gray
And the clock strikes S-E-X with the girlfriend next
We can watch from our window like a sick insect
I get chills through my spine when I see her in over time
Debbie went to Broadway yesterday
Woe, oh, oh, ay, ay
Twisting every boy toys neck all day
Like a pinprick right through the heart they have no chance
Like a freak in a brothel wanting cheap romance
She wore black round the eyes just to scare all the normal guys
Debbie's changing faces everyday until she noticed me
With an infectious kiss of jealousy
She's making eyes at me
Debbie was a lesbian yesterday
Woe, oh, oh, ay, ay
Changing with the times this phase won't stay
And the clock strikes Y-E-S with complete distress
Phoney Lovely now cause she's my sick princess
I can tell she's the one
I never thought depression so much fun
Debbie's changing faces everyday until she noticed me
With an infectious kiss of jealousy
She's making eyes at me
Debbie was a lesbian yesterday
Woe, oh, oh, ay, ay
Fighting all the way her mother's hair to gray
And the clock strikes S-E-X with the girlfriend next
We can watch from our window like a sick insect
I get chills through my spine when I see her in over time
Debbie's changing faces everyday until she noticed me
With an infectious kiss of jealousy
She's making eyes at me
Debbie's changing faces everyday until she noticed me
With an infectious kiss of jealousy
She's making eyes at me |
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| down the drain |
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| 07:42pm 10/06/2003 |
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Yo. Well i will try to sum up the worst day of my life briefly. I woke up at about 2:30. Sat in bed. Then at about 1:30 i called Kristin and she was like "I can't talk right now i'll call you back" so i waited and did nothing until she did. And we talked. Then i got off to clean my rooom and took a shower then i called back. And so we were talking and she kept blowing in the phone...so i hung up on her. But when in tryed to clal her back she hung up on me. So i walked over to her house. And everything was cool. we called Tyeler and talked to him on speaker phone for ever and a day. Then we called Dusty.....well....we talked for a while...and then Dusty's like "I hate speaker phone" so they got off speaker phone and Kristin and Dusty talked for 8 years while i sat and wondered What the fuck was going on. Then her sister came in and we (Her sister and I) wnet outside and played in the hose while Kristin stayed in and talked to Dusty. Then i went inside and jusped on top of Kristin to get her wet and she Fucking yelled at me. Then told me to leave the room. So...i came home. I mean...i may be anoining but i don't think i did anything to diserve to be screamed at. Kristin was all pissed becouse i was over while she was talking to Dusty. Oh.....I am such a bad bad person for wanting to hang out with my friend while i was at her house. But the phone is appearantly so much more important. all i am anymore is the worthless peic of shit that gets screamed at. DAMNIT......I AM SO SICK OF BEING ABUSED...DAMNIT...ALL I EVER DO IS BE NICE BUT OHH..................EVERYONE ASSUMES THAT I CAN EASILY SHAKE IT OFF AND BE HAPPY. WELL DAMNIT I AMD SO FUCKING TIRED OF ALL THIS FUCKING BULLSHIT. LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE. i hate you all |
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