...Cherry-Tinted Fantasy

stay[fantasies \\ dreamers \\ seasons \\ meggy \\ illusions \\ claims \\ back]
away[gemmy \\ schellen \\ claim a vocalist \\ j-pop icons \\ alessa \\ loveli*mess \\ Gaia]
layout and writings © Meggy.

Saturday, December 13, 2003.

01:10 PM.
Mood lazy.
Music cali gari - Hakkyou channel.
I stole a survey from Ashy.

*snicker* )
[2 fantasies \\ dream of me?]

Friday, December 12, 2003.

08:18 PM.
Mood ecstatic.
Music Glay - Way of Difference.
Wow. I have this really strange feeling right now. It's a strange, heart-clenching, exhilerating feeling. I feel like dancing--or even better, flying, if I could. There is a small hint of anger, irritation, and disgust in me as well (which is normal anyway XD), but for the most part I feel....indescribably happy. I mean...I would be able to describe it, but I don't want to put it too frankly in here. :3

Wheee, now I'm in a state of catatonic stupor. (Not really, I was just having fun with a Psychology word. o.O)

But back to reality, I apologize for not updating or commenting at all in more than a month. T_T I'm sooooo bad.

Oh yeah, if any of you want to talk to me, my new AIM screen name is kowareta ningyou, but please comment here if you wish to be added because I might not have you already and you can't contact me if I don't have you on my list. ^^;

Bleh. I don't have anything to write about. Damn writer's block. >>;

OH! I know. ^^

Lately I'm becoming addicted to reading. It's so fun. :3 But only if I'm reading a book that actually motivates me to read it. :\ On Thanksgiving or so I got The Last Unicorn book from my dad (he sent it to me) and I read that. After I finished it, I read a book that my mom gave me called When the Wind Blows by James Patterson. It was really good. :D I finished that, and then I read Frankenstein (which is a book that I need to read for English Honors next semester). It frustrated me that I read it for two hours one night and only read 40 pages. :\ Especially when I read When the Wind Blows for two hours the night before and read 200 pages! How ironic, ne? Anyway, I finished that a few days ago. I couldn't decide what to start on after that. I was thinking about starting Monster by Jonathan Kellerman (because it's another one of my mom's books), but then I decided not to since it sounded like a book that would keep me up too late if I were to read it since I read a lot of my books at night before I go to bed (especially on the weekends) and it would probably scare me. :\ Then I was thinking about reading The Eye of the World from the Wheel of Time series because I'd heard that the series was good and my mom had it on her bookshelf, but I decided not to since it was over 800 pages and I decided that I would get bored of it after a while.

And then one day I was drawing a picture of one of the characters from When the Wind Blows, and I showed it to my mom and she suggested that I e-mail the author a copy. Sooo that afternoon I was looking for James Patterson's e-mail address on his official website, but instead I only found a mailing address. And then I looked around on the site and noticed that When the Wind Blows had a sequel called The Lake House. And then I was going to write down the title so I could get it sometime, but then I looked over to my mom's shelf, and she already had it, a brand-new hardback. So that's what I'm reading now. Cool, huh? :P

Okay, I'm done rambling. o.o; Bye bye friends and other readers. :3
[2 fantasies \\ dream of me?]

Monday, November 03, 2003.

05:05 PM.
Mood okay.
Music Psycho le Cemu - Undead Man.
Here's a survey...I stoled it. From Ashy. :3

Read more... )
[dream of me?]

04:37 PM.
Mood sad.
Music Lareine - Lillie Charlotte.
Sorry I haven't been updating lately...I haven't been in the mood to. But right now I feel like it.

I started downloading some music earlier today, and I just remembered why I don't download music on SoulSeek (or anything really because SoulSeek is the best for me) anymore. It's because people on there will PM me or something and say that they'll ban me from downloading from them if I don't share, and I don't like communicating with people in places like that. -.- But back to the not sharing thing. I have a reason for not sharing. I have a 56k connection. I don't sit here and do nothing on the internet while waiting for the fucking song to download. I think that the sharing should be for users who have good connections. :\ I mean, I'm not saying it's really right of me not to share what I have to the rest of the world on SoulSeek, but I don't want to turn my free time into a time of frustration because of a bad connection due to people downloading off of me while I'm trying to download a song. -.-;

In other news....:\ I feel stressed out. It's not really something extremely bad for me, but it's more stress than what I'm used to handling. ._.; I mean, the only reason it's so overwhelming is because I haven't been under a lot of stress in a long time. I'm lashing out at everyone, I'm worrying too much about myself and not feeling helpful toward other people, I'm feeling more lazy than usual, and I think I'm generally falling into a state of depression. :\ But this time of year is never good for me anyway. It's no big deal. Oh well. :\ I'll be okay.
[dream of me?]

Wednesday, October 22, 2003.

04:30 PM.
Mood cheerful.
Music Asami Sanada - Welcome!.
mermaid )
Isn't it pretty? :3
[2 fantasies \\ dream of me?]

Tuesday, October 21, 2003.

Hi. 05:33 PM.
Mood content.
Music Dir en Grey - Obscure.
Yeah, I haven't been updating lately....sorry. I've been trying to comment whenever I feel like it...but...I've been sorta neglecting to do so....sorry about that too.

Anyway. I'm not in a great mood right now. I mean, I'm not in a bad mood, it's just that I'm not in a super-happy-Meggyliciously-great mood. :3

And I'm getting sick of that couple that sits across from my seat on the bus. Damnit. I sat there first. Do they honestly have to ruin my whole bus rides all cuddling and shit? >>; Stupid freshmen. [end rant] Actually, I don't mind either of them. They're both okay, it's just that I don't like the way they act in public. I don't know. Maybe I'm just jealous cuz I'm not gettin' any. Bleh. XD

Speaking of not getting any. It seems like everyday it gets harder for me to go on with my everyday life. Lack of sleep, stress from school, missing Billy, stupid people who piss me off, and a general loneliness when I'm around people sorta makes me wish that it were all over with. -.-; I wanted to skip today...but I didn't. Because I had a test in Psychology. But...what's kinda funny is that I'd rather miss a test day in Psychology than a day of notes. Because on a day of notes I could take my notes and then take the test in class because we don't usually do anything important after we take notes. However, if I missed a whole day of notes I would have to get the notes from the day I missed, and do them in class the next day along with the notes. Tests are just easier to do, in my opinion. Especially since they are open-notes in Psychology. But I think that that's not really a good way to teach...because that way we don't have to actually LEARN the material, we just have to write it down and use it when the test comes...Not that I'm really complaining, because that makes it easier for me....but you know. XD

Anyway...I think that's all that I really want to write about. Oh yeah! I drew a kickass picture in art class today. It's a colored pencil drawing of a mermaid, and I went all out with it, I even added a pretty background to it. And when Meggy adds backgrounds to a colored pencil drawing, you KNOW she's spending some serious time on that picture. XD Hehe.

I love Dir en Grey.
[dream of me?]

Wednesday, October 08, 2003.

Ugly-pretty? :3 10:25 PM.
Mood cheerful.
Music Shiina Ringo - Tsumi to Batsu.
I took my senior portraits today. I feel ugly...yet at the same time I somehow feel strangely pretty. I didn't like the pictures at all myself, but my mom and the lady who took them said that they came out really cute and pretty and stuff, and then when we were done we went to my uncle's restaurant to eat and my mom showed my aunt the little black and white printouts of our order and stuff and she said they were really pretty too and then she like went over to another part of the restaurant and showed them to the uncle of the girl who became Miss Virginia and when she came back to our table she said that he said that I was beautiful and could enter a Miss Virginia thing. o.o; I honestly must say I was really surprised. I feel weird about it and really flattered, but somewhat unworthy because there are so many girls out there that are even in my fucking school who are much much MUCH prettier than me and stuff. x_X I feel weird about it. I mean, I have high self confidence in my appearance when it comes to reality and webcam photos, but in the world of real photos and digital photos I hate the way I look. x_X; I don't know. Maybe I just need to learn to love the way I look even when I feel ugly. It's bad to dislike oneself. Bleh. Anyway. Bedtime now. Me go. Night night.
[6 fantasies \\ dream of me?]

Tuesday, October 07, 2003.

08:46 PM.
Mood amused.
Music Malice Mizer - Unmei no Deai.
I'm a bitch. Haha.
[8 fantasies \\ dream of me?]

07:44 AM.
Mood accomplished.
pictures )
[7 fantasies \\ dream of me?]

Monday, September 29, 2003.

04:47 PM.
Mood calm.
Whoo. o.o I'm sorry, I haven't updated this lately. I haven't been updating anything lately really. Sorry bout that! I've been lazy and bored and busy. o.o Sorta. XD Anywayyyy I think I'm becoming a Lord of the Rings freak sorta. o.o; I'm on The Two Towers now. ^^; The books are really good so far. o.o Ummm, anyway, that's all I felt like writing about...sorry. x_X
[9 fantasies \\ dream of me?]