MaorianAngel

8:34pm: Ohana
I can't do it Blurty. I suck at the other journal. I had to come back to you. Tonight is a "Blue Moon". Being the Cancer that I am, I feel the moons pull immensely tonight. I'm completley unproductive and very moody. As Charlie Brown would say...UGH! It's a hot August night. The very last night of August. It's still 87 degrees out right now. I can't believe summer has come to an end already. I can't say it hasn't been a full summer. This has to have been the busiest one on record yet. My planner shows no mercy either. I am completely booked solid until November 1st. Then after that I have to prepare for Bustle By The Bay. It has been exciting being involved in so many things. I have spread myself a bit thin, to bad it hasn't worked on my body. Weight is the same. That ongoing struggle of my life. Work still remains at it's Hamburger Hill status. As usual Carelink fucked with me today, you can always count on them to ruin a Holiday weekend. In other news, the shop is off the charts. I can't say enough about those guys. They have never lost sight of who they are or where they came from either. Ok, I feel better that I have talked to you, I know I didn't say much, but it helped. So, see you soon, Blurty!

Trinka Five
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8 8 8

Hearse On, Rave Up

PS The Hearse looks and runs amazing, she looks like she did the day she rolled off the line at ACCUBUILT.

12:01am: Couldn't Resist
I miss you Blurty, real bad, the other journal just isn't the same...

1:54pm: Why
Why Blurty? Do you keep doing this to me, Why? Well you won't get away with this time. I have an external hard drive and I know how to use it.

2:35pm: Thank God
I was having a complete meltdown due to Blurty being down. I thought I lost my memories.

I will up date when I get home. Just stopped in to see if it was working.,

9:57pm: Under Oath
Hi

I was a complete monster today.

5:30pm: Cosi Fan Tutte
Sorry Blurty, I know I haven't been keeping you updated on life. Well, I have a good excuse, it's CRAZY BUSY. Way busier then usual. My most exciting update is...

I GOT TO CREATE WARDROBE FOR A REAL MOVIE!!! The actress that I made the clothes for is even on IMDB. The other girl I didn't get to make her clothes, but I styled her. It was an awesome experience. I made some really good connections as well. I'm positive I will be getting more work in that realm.

CaraMia's Night has the East Bank Market again this weekend. I got invited back for another two weekends in September. I need to get my stock back up. So much is happening for me on this front right now. I'm anxious for Teddy to move so I can take over that damn building.

I went to the Doctor today. He is more then thrilled with the progress I have made. He reduced the meds once again. I'm so thankful. It's so hard for me to take medicine. I trust him though. He hasn't tried to put me on a ton of shit I don't need. I feel better then I have in so long.

Work is the usual hellish nightmare. No sense in even wasting any thoughts or space on that.

On a sad note, no Halloween at my house again this year. I can't even believe it. This is just crazy. I can't believe we can't get this done. I've never had such a hard time getting people to do work for money in my life.

I came up with a really cool tattoo idea for my Halloween sleeve though. So that will help make me feel a little better.

Hearse On, Rave Up

1:56am: Heaven Isn't To Far Away
Jani Lane is dead. He was 47.

This is just as upsetting to me as when Lane Staley died. I'm having a hard time expressing my emotions.

Sleep well Brother.

6:55pm: 265
I did go to Ohio, it actually turned out better then I hoped for. Until...the way home. Paula's husband if a fucking pyscho. If he had such a damn problem with her going he should have just said no. Other then that, it went pretty well. Nicole and Mandy didn't even fight.

So, the offical shut down of Berkley is October 1st. If we even make it that long. Especially with Mercury going into retrograde, yeah right. I have anxiety. I'm worried about what will happen to some of the clients, but as the song says, "I can't take anymore".

I got my labs done on Wednesday, those were great. The doctor is so pleased. I am too. I've worked really hard to combat this. I will not let this get me.

East Bank Market again tomorrow. I got asked to be the featured artist on August 4 for 1st Thursdays as well. My banner came today too! So CaraMia's Night is doing great. I also got word that Teddy will be moved out on October 1st so it's time to bring the gallery back. It's going to be different this time and more amazing.

I know it's only July but I'm excited for Halloween already. Please Lord, let this house be ready.

Keep Calm
Rock On

1:07am: Guess Who Was VIP Again Last Night?
So, out of nowhere, Justify gets dropped off VIP tickes for Finding Clyde and Lynard Skynard. Pretty damn wild. We had an amazing time. Got spoiled as usual. Justify said he only spent 9.00 the whole night. Those guys really take good care of us. It was old home week in VIP, even saw my old boyfriend Jay. Justify made fun of him and said he looked like Tom. What the hell is it with these guys and Michigan football? ROFL Got some really good shots. Overall had a grand time.

I'm supposed to go to Ohio this weekend for ghost hunting. I don't want to go. I have come to loath being around Mandy and Nicole. I can't stand that user bitch Shelly who has attached herself to them either. As much as I want to see that building, the thought of spending an entire precious weekend with them turns my stomach.

Very hot out last couple of days. About time. It's still 82 degrees right now. Alas, it won't last. Probably get cold after this week. HaHa

I made a few cool retro baby doll dresses. I will be selling those at the next East Bank Market event. I'm hoping to do well there again. I really am into that.

Thank you for your many blessings SH. BV, SJ, SA and Baron. Watch over and keep us all.

Trinka Five
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8 8 8

As above, so below, so mote it be.

Hearse On, Rave Up

Oh, I almost forgot, Jason came over today and he is picking up the Pink Cadillac! I'm so excited to have her finally underway.

1:56am: Now I Remember Why We Work So Hard
I have to record this so I don't forget anything. Tonight was the Sick Puppies, Pop Evil, Egypt Central and Finding Clyde show sponsered by...VOODOO TATTOO. Fucking Amazing!!!! To date, this is probably one of the biggest things we have done. The Corporate guys catered to us in every way possible. We all went, the whole shop plus wives and girlfriends. It was a great feeling to be able to have our staff treated like kings. The bands were so thankful for all we did. Once again, Pop Evil played 100 in a 55 for me. This is the second time, but this was the first time in front of 20,000 people. When we walked through that gate and saw Justify's banner hanging there...I was at a loss...I teared up so many times tonight. I am such an emotional fool. lol I enjoyed myself to the fullest. All four bands were great. Finding Clyde all had on Voodoo shirts. I couldn't stop smiling. Pop Evil were happy as always to see us. Justify has made some good friends there. Lynn and Matt from the station had the crowd cheer for Voodoo four different times. My heart was so full seeing the look on Justify and the rest of the gangs face. We had catered food and drinks. Then Burnaround played the after party. Me and the guitar player, Steve used to be in a band togther about 100 years ago. We sat and told stories and had everyone dying. I just can't seem to get it all out. I can't stop smiling. I love our Voodoo family and I'm so prould of their talent and how hard they work. Once again, I have to say, I know it's hard sometimes, I know the stress is through the roof, I wouldn't trade if for anything. I love our life and I love our krewe and I love what we have worked for and built. It's nice to feel better too.

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you SH, BV, SJ, SA and Baron for the many, many blessings you give us.

Trinka Five
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8 8 8

As above, so below, so mote it be

Hearse On, Rave Up

I probably forgot about thousand details, but I just wanted to let some of it out before I burst. I got tons of pics too.

12:24am: An Ideal Husband
"It is not the perfect, but the imperfect, who have need of love. It is when we are wounded by our own hands, or by the hands of others, that love should come to cure us -- else what use is love at all? All sings, except a sing against itself, love should forgive. All lives, save loveless lives, true love should pardon."

Oscar Wilde, was there ever a more romantic and tragic character? Today went very well. It made me excited to start the gallery again. It's been on my mind almost everyday. After seeing the reaction people had to me and my things, gave me that flight of fancy I needed. Yet another crossroads in my life.

Even though today was excellent, I have much anxiety.

The weather is to my liking.

Trinka Five
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8 8 8

Knight of Wands
Queen of Cups

Peace I need

9:37pm: Not Long Past, Your Past
I met with Severin today. Why do I always feel like that "in-awe 14 year old girl" still when I'm around him? I felt amazing when I left there. I think the term once again is validation. We all came from such simple humble places and by some vortex or strange dynamic we have ebbed and flowed out of each others lives on a constant, each time returning to the "we're getting the band back together" mode with more to bring to the table. I smile when I think of all of us back then, like some bad episode of That 70's Show. We all are older, fatter, wiser, richer but we all think we are still those reckless teenagers who are invincible.

In other news, my "real" job is spiriling into the abyss. I'm positive CYM is done on 9/1. I'd be ok with that if I wasn't so nervous about FFM's ability to stay afloat. Moneywise, things are majorly improved. The staff although seem to have made it their personal mission to fuck as much shit up as possible so the State has every reason to shut us down. Oh, and did I mention Keenan is completely checked out?

Tomorrow is a big day for CaraMia's Night. I'm nervous as hell about it, but you have to put yourself out there if you ever want anything wonderful to happen.

I am working on getting my WWII kit together. I'm going to do a Red Cross impression. I am struggling with those orginal patterns from the 40's. It's like reading another language. Actually, I can read another language easier then I can those patterns. I found a few dresses on etsy I may order to get by until I can produce something of my own.

Electric Forest. I could cry when I talk about it. That's how emotional it was. Jesus wept I'm sure. Sounds like they are doing it again next year. Response was outstanding. I am so buying an RV. For real. Yes. An RV.

VooDoo sponsered a whole day of music at the Showboat, we did Sick Puppies, our good freinds Pop Evil, Finding Clyde and someone else...I forget. lol We got serious VIP for that show so all of VooDoo is going including the wives and the girlfriends. Should make for an interesting night. I love my husband and I'm proud of him. He's the Goddamn reason we're in VIP. LMAO

So what I learned from all of this is, the word ok is a little man.

Hearse On, Rave Up

Trinka Five
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8 8 8

Thank you for your many blessings SH, BV, SJ, SA and Baron. Bless and keep us.

12:49am: Is That French
2 of Cups
6 of Swords

So much to update, to tired to do so. Will try to get caught up this weekend.

Grease for Peace

2:15am: You Can't Record A Police Officer
Weather remains crap. Didn't make it over to St. Stans yet. Hope to visit tomorrow.

My feet hurt. I was at the cutting table all day. I think I need some new crocs.

I want to sleep in tomorrow.

I miss sleep.

3:04am: Of Transformation, Unseen relics And Half-Dreamed Memories
I think we're alone now, well, actually, I'm alone. Kind of melancholy tonight. I miss Justify. I miss lots of people.

So, did I mention my Mother won the lottery? Yeah, that shit's real. I'm happy for her, but it seems very surreal. Like, I feel like I shouldn't even speak the word money around her in fear of her thinking I'm asking for money. How long does that symptom last?

Why am I still awake? Oh yeah, I don't sleep anymore. WTF is wrong with me? I'm fucking scared to take adipex. If I can't sleep this bad on my own, what would it be like with that shit?

You know Blurty, I just asked your opinion on a bunch of shit. You could have the decency to answer.

One more thing, I need new tires, AGAIN.

Trinka Five
Trinka Five
Trinka Five

As above, so below, so mote it be.

Hearse On, Rave Up

PS The hearse is all done except for the windshield. She will be home soon. God, I have missed her.

2:31am: Endless Summer
That's what it seemed like when I was younger. Fuck teachers and all their whinning about being underpaid. You don't have to work during the summer. I will take that in a second.

I'm so tired, but I don't want to sleep. I hate how fast the weekend goes by. As I always say, never enough time.

Batman

A new level of being.

Get back to spirituality.

11:56pm: Jet Stream
Weather got up to 90 on Monday. Today is Wednesday, it dropped right back down. It's only suppose to be 67 tomorrow. RAIN again. Now normally I'm into rainy days. I wouldn't mind them so much if it was warm and the bedroom ceiling was fixed. Nothing will dry out to get it fixed. It's supposed to rain for the next 5 days again and the highest expected temp is 73.

Gas is back up again today too. 4.17 as I go to sleep. Why? No one knows.

I tired. Over tired as usual.

Lots of work to do in the work room this weekend. Severin has me making wardrobe for the movie. I'm very thankful. Yeah, I'll be in the closing credits! HaHa My hororscope said that yellow was my lucky color today and my best time was 5pm. Guess what time I talked to Severin? And we all know what the name of the movie is. ;)

Thank you for your many blessings SH, BV, SJ, SA and Baron. Bless and keep us.

Trinka Five
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8 8 8

As above, so below, so mote it be.

P L U R

2:13am: A Lot Of These Things Have To Do With Social Engineering
48 Degrees

FUCK

When you use the word opressive, some one must be motivated to opress.

Transformers

In the law of supply and demand, the demand is there, but the supply is pretty low.

Il me poignarde comme un poignard.

2:22am: The Money Is Under One Of The Floor Slats By The Door
41 Degrees

I Swear I Don't Have A Gun

12:23am: Walking On Gucci, Wearing Yves Saint Laurent
Weather update:

It's 44 degrees. It's May 26th. Does any one else see something wrong with this statement? I can't deal with it. At all. It's only supposed to get up to 54 tomorrow. WTF

Pretty sure we are not going to DEMF. We can freeze in the rain at home.

Let's set our sights on the Electric Forest.

I have to go to bed. It's all I can do at this point.

7:20pm: Lemmings Are About
Intelligent people don't always do the right thing, only the evolutionarily novel thing.

Today is May 16th. Last night it got down to 34 degrees. Today there was a wind chill. A wind chill I said. On May 16th. I can't take it. I am so cold and am so tired of being cold and sick of being tired and cold and can't stand one more minute of being sick and tired and cold.

It feels like a precious wound, a heartbreak you won't let go of because it hurts too good. We all want things to stay the same. Settle for living in misery because we're afraid of change, of things crumbling to ruins. Then I looked around to this place, at the chaos it has endured - the way it has been adapted, burned, pillaged and found a way to build itself back up again. And I was reassured, maybe my life hasn't been so chaotic, it's just the world that is, and the real trap is getting attached to any of it. Ruin is a gift. Ruin is the road to transformation.

Remember that sign I had posted on the old quote board in my office at Benchmark? It talked about the Chinese symbol for crisis meaning both danger and oppurtunity. I've been thinking of that often lately.

Yet living in a crisis-ridden world has its positive side. The silver lining at the edge of the gathering clouds is what the Chinese had long known but we have all but forgotten: crisis is both danger and opportunity. The dangers are now evident, and also the opportunities are becoming visible.

Hearse On, Rave Up

10:26pm: Waiting, Once Again
I'm pretty sure I spend a large amount of my life waiting. Waiting for others, waiting for my husband, waiting for the mail, waiting for answers, waiting and waiting. I got no patience and I hate waiting.

This weather is KILLING me. It is April 29th and its suppose to get down to 34 tonight. The day time isn't much better. It was 43 today. I think the almanac is right. I believe there will be no summer.

Sewing is going extremely well. I so happy with everything I been putting out.

Guess what, I have to go, because work is bothering me as usual.

11:31pm: Oh My
I seem to have lost track of the days again. One just blends into the other. The weather has me quite melancholy. According to the Farmer's Almanac we aren't supposed to have much of a summer. That's to sad to even think about now.

Still feeling better. Sugar is staying under control. Weight loss is non-exsistent though. I wonder if its my age? I sometimes forget that I am 40. It's hard to digest at times. It isn't the actual age itself that frightens me, it's the time that has past. Only yesterday I was 17. I'm sure of it. At least it seems so. Don't get me wrong, I have no desire to live in the past. The past is exactly that, the past, it's just that I can't wrap my mind around how fast the time has gone by. Guess I'm not the only one though, after all, someone invented nostalga.

My boy moved downstate. That is emotional as well. He hasn't lived with me for over two years now, but he was at least close. I miss him all over again.

The dogs are making me crazy. I love them though.

I made a pretty cool steampunk garment for Courtney. Well, at least I think it is.

Infragile

Bless and keep us, SH, BV, SJ, SA and Baron. Thank you all for the many blessings you have given us.

Trinka Five
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8 8 8

Oh, and one more thing, fuck you Driver Responsibility Fees.

1:23am: I Can Think Of A Lot Of Reasons
Current Events:

Sugar under control!!!! I feel so much better now that it is. It's so weird how I was that sick and didn't know it. I kept chalking how I was feeling up to depression. No wonder I thought it was the worst depression ever.

This is Easter week. NO LISA THIS WEEK!!! Everybody say yeah!!! Yeah!!! Mario is suppose to go to Vegas on Thursday, we will see. I'm not getting that ahead of myself. There will be no Easter dinner here. Still no kitchen. Mother said there is no point in having Easter because none of us can eat anything. That is my Mother, so positive. I don't mind, I still intend to enjoy the holiday.

Weather is still stupid. They are predicting snow for tomorrow. I'm not even hoping for 70's at this point, I could live with 50's.

So, I don't want to jinx myself, but Justify and I are going to plan on attending the Electric Forest. This event is so amazing. We are waiting for Mercury to go direct before we buy the tickets. Can you blame us? I really want to have this experience. We already have most of the krewe asembled. We are going to do it up old school and proper.

Paula and I now have purses and bags for sale in four local stores. It's exciting. Not always easy to keep up, but I"m not complaining. It's really good to get our name out there.

Bless and keep us SH, BV, SJ, SA and Baron. Thank you all for the many gifts you have bestowed.

I got friends on the other side. ;)

Trinka Five
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1:23am: I Can Think Of A Lot Of Reasons
Current Events:

Sugar under control!!!! I feel so much better now that it is. It's so weird how I was that sick and didn't know it. I kept chalking how I was feeling up to depression. No wonder I thought it was the worst depression ever.

This is Easter week. NO LISA THIS WEEK!!! Everybody say yeah!!! Yeah!!! Mario is suppose to go to Vegas on Thursday, we will see. I'm not getting that ahead of myself. There will be no Easter dinner here. Still no kitchen. Mother said there is no point in having Easter because none of us can eat anything. That my Mother, so positive. I don't mind, I still intend to enjoy the holiday.

Weather is still stupid. They are predicting snow for tomorrow. I'm not even hoping for 70's at this point, I could live 50's.

So, I don't want to jinx myself, but Justify and I are going to plan on attending the Electric Forest. This event is so amazing. We are waiting for Mercury to go direct before we buy the tickets. Can you blame us? I really want to have this experience. We already have most of the krewe asembled. We are going to do it up old school and proper.

Paula and I now have purses and bags for sale in four local stores. It's exciting. Not always easy to keep up, but I"m not complaining. It's really good to get our name out there.

Bless and keep us SH, BV, SJ, SA and Baron. Thank you all for the many gifts you have bestowed.

I got friends on the other side. ;)

Trinka Five
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