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Tuesday, September 9th, 2003
4:30 am - Poor, neglected Blurty!
Well, it's obvious that I haven't posted here in almost a month, so I'm just going to point over to my links on the left side of the page ~points~ and say if you are at all interested in what I have to say, click on the link to my LJ. That community is just so much busier, and just about ALL of my friends from Blurty are over there, too.

(scream for me)

Friday, August 15th, 2003
10:13 am - ACK!!
I have a favor to ask of the GW fans who come to my journals...Windy wrote me this morning that one of the pics I'd used in my new background on my Blurty was a fan art, and I took it down immediately, but wondered if anyone might recognize any of the other pics I have up as being done by fans, as well? All of the pics I used came from a doujinshi scan site, so I assumed that all were from djs. Many of them I did have to alter to get rid of text, so I know they are ok, but many of them DIDN'T have cover text, so they could feasibly be unattributed fan arts, as well. I have no qualms putting up dj pics, because in my mind the artists were paid for their work, but I wouldn't put up someone else's fan work on MY site (even if it's just a journal) on purpose. So if anyone recognizes any of the pretty pics in my background as NOT being a dj, but rather done by a fan, PLEASE let me know which one, so I can change it out!! I know all the YnM pics on my LJ are official, so I've no worries about it, it's just the GWs that I don't know about.


(scream for me)

Thursday, August 14th, 2003
1:20 pm - Multi tasking
Been playing with my Blurty and LJs as I've been burning countless discs of anime for Shanna and Julie. To BOTH of you, I'm not sure if I'll have a vehicle today, as my mom doesn't feel well, so I really don't want to drag her across town to give me the car so I can go to the post office. For anyone who doesn't know this, we OWN two vehicles, but Mom doesn't have one, so my car lives in her garage. When hubby is at work, this means I'm stranded unless Mom can come over to let me have use of the car. This is one of the major factors in us hoping to buy that house two doors away from her, I'd actually have use of my car with no hassles of Mom having to get ready to come over, I can just walk over and get it. She's 74 years old (Mom, not the car), and is having more and more trouble getting up and around, so I feel really guilty dragging her over here when she doesn't feel well. She will be going to the beauty salon tomorrow, though, so will be out anyway, so if I don't get your discs in the mail today (which I seriously doubt that I will), they'll be out tomorrow.

Anyway, I played around with my journal pages, the Blurty is GW themed with a snazzy new background, and the LJ is YnM, also with snazzy background. I added links from each journal to the other, as well as a link to The Vault from each page. Also changed my comments thingie, so that instead of saying "comment on this" it now says "scream for me". How many fics have I read lately where one of the boys says that to the other in the throes of passion? LOL

I was EXTREMELY busy the past couple of days, thought I'd have some nice quiet home-time on hubby's days off, but my boy's birthday party is on the 23rd, we're having it at Children's Discovery Museum, so I had tons of stuff to do for that (getting plates & stuff, paying for the room, buying gifts, doing a gift registry at Toys R Us), tons of stuff to get him ready for kiddiegarten (registered, school supplies, shoe store, clothes), plus had 80 million other things to do the past couple days. I'm BEAT!! On hubby's days off, he usually is up for doing all the running around with me, but he's been really tired, so I had to do it all on my own. Poor me. LOL

Watched my favorite show in the world Tuesday night. GOD I love Boy Meets Boy!! I hope they keep up with this program, that they have more guys doing this whole date a gaggle of men shows. I was SHOCKED that Michael was straight! He was one of the guys that I could have SWORN was gay!! Wasn't too shocked that Dan was straight. Apparently there is one straight guy left in the group, and my guess is either Sean or Darren (otherwise known as Doogie Howser, M.D.) is the straight one. I'm torn between three of the remaining guys as being my favorite...either Wes, Robb or Franklin. I love them all. I think Wes has the best chance of winning.

Ok, I've got a 2 year old that needs a nap, so gotta go!

(scream for me)

Saturday, August 9th, 2003
5:55 pm - Quizzes, quizzes, quizzes!!
Snagged from EVERYONE!!

You Got Kurama!
Lucky Lucky You, You got the Kitsune Bishounen of
the Group! He'll probably be mischevious and
playful in bed due to his kitsune side but hey
it's fun!

Which male from YYH would you have sex with?
brought to you by Quizilla

YAAAAAAAAAAY!!!! I was HOPING I'd get the fox!! Thanks to Jen, I've been reading Kurama X Hiei fics the past couple of days. DAMN I love Kurama!!


RESTRAINTS! Congratulations! You like being held
down or keeping someone else helpless! You are

Which Sex Toy are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

So Kurama needs to cuff me? LOL I can live with that!


You represent... hope.
You represent... hope.
You're quite a daydreamer and can be a hopeless
romantic. You enjoy being creative and don't
mind being alone at times. You have goals, and
know what you want in life... even if they are
a little far fetched.

What feeling do you represent?
brought to you by Quizilla

Pretty purple!!!


sexual suggestive horny
Damn you're a hot SOB! Calm the hell down! You have
sex written all over you in chocolate sauce and
whipped cream!...wait.. can I join??

How do people see you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Isn't it a given that you are going to get this result if you pick the answer "I could have been having sex!" to the question "What did you think of this quiz?"


Raven Layne, from this day forward,

your Punk Rock Band name shall be....
Glomping Bishies

This is appropriate!


click here to take some more great tests at internet junk

brighter than day-glo, cheaper than heavy black eyeliner, you are costume jewelry.
madonna was your goddess, from her black rubber bracelets to lacey ankle socks.
with posters of pat benatar and cyndi lauper in your room, you practiced your valley accent daily and eventually mastered the phrase, 'barf me out to the max!'
so totally better than your best friend tiffany, fer sure.


click here to take more tests like this at internet junk!
what warning label are you?

Ok, on the results page, I got "Keep Out of Direct Sunlight" which is entirely appropriate for a vamp lover! But when I copied and pasted, I got the above. Some days, THIS is the best label for me!!

(scream for me)

Thursday, August 7th, 2003
7:32 pm
Abraham Lincoln
You were Lincoln!

You came a long way from your humble
birth in a log cabin in the Kentucky frontier
in 1809. Your family moved to Illinois when
you were 21, and at age 22 you become a
surveyer, shopkeeper, and postmaster in
Springfield. In 1834 you got elected to the
Illinois state legislature, where you first
denouced slavery publicly. In 1836 you got
your law license. At the age of 33 you married
Mary Todd, and had four children.
Unfortunately, one died at age 4 and another at
age 12. After losing the election to Senate,
you became nominated as the new Republican
party's candidate for president. You won the
election, just as southern states began
seceding from the Union. You became the
president that saw the nation through its
bloodiest war to date. During your second term
in office, the same year that Robert E. Lee
surrenders and ends the Civil War, you were
shot in the Ford Theater by John Wilkes Booth.
Later that year, the Thirteenth Amemdment to
the Constitution abolished slavery.

Which Leader Were You in a Past Life?
brought to you by Quizilla

COOL!! Especially considering that I LIVE in the Land of Lincoln, less than an hour from Lincoln's, erm...MY former home. Sucks about the gun thing, though. I just wanted to watch a play!!

(scream for me)

7:24 am - Mindless Rambling

I swear, my mad_about_yaoi mailbox just sits and taunts me all day long. It laughs at me. Evilly. It's wicked, I tell you. I actually paid 30 bucks to get the 25mb of storage (plus stationery! whee!) because I kept having to unload it. The guys will be here to fix the A/C today (FINALLY!) and I'm bound and determined to have that mailbox all empty and fully responded to by the time they leave. Jessica will be over at Mom's house, because strangers freak her out, and I can sit Johnathan over on his computer to play Jimmy Neutron, so I'll have some time to devote to it. I WILL FINISH MY E-MAIL!!!!! I've got 80 million replies to make to Yaoilicious. Haven't even welcomed my little sister Rae to the group. How bad is that? I never did read Cyn's rec for the fic club, and I need to read Misha's, too. God, isn't that just like me to start a new group and then abandon it? ~sighs and shakes head~

We looked at a house to BUY the other day!! We've been married for almost nine years, it's about time we actually shoveled our money into something we OWN!! It's a small house, doesn't have a basement, but it's on the most wonderful, quiet cul-de-sac, and it's two houses from my mom. How perfect is that? Instant babysitter!! One of the best schools in town is about 3 blocks away, so Johnathan could walk to kiddiegarten, we already know several of the neighbors, including one boy who was in Johnathan's preschool. There are lots of kids on the court, many his age, and even a girl Jessica's age across the street. We'd be living in a NEIGHBORHOOD!!!! Where we live now is a GORGEOUS historic area, it's beautiful and I love it. I love our house, it's tiny, but it's good for us. We all like each other. But we don't know a single neighbor, and we've lived here over 3 years now! I'm not a terribly social person anymore, anyway, but this is the first place we've lived that I didn't have at least one friend as a neighbor.

Anyway, the lady hasn't listed it yet, we just know about her moving to Texas because of mom, so we have first dibs on it. She hasn't had it appraised, so she doesn't know how much to ask for it. We already pay 775.00 a month for this house, and a realtor friend says that for that amount, we can afford around 100,000 house, and with not having a basement, and being an older home, that's probably about what it will go for. It has a HUGE fenced in back yard, so you know what that means...we'll get a DOG!!!!!! YAAAAY!! I want a female miniature schnauzer, and call her Lilith. Lili for short.

Geez, I have so much rambling to do today!! Watched the new Boy Meets Boy on Tuesday. I'm going for Wes or Robb as my favorites. He eliminated two straight guys on this episode, and the one gay guy that he eliminated was one that I THOUGHT was straight, but wasn't. Can't wait for the next episode!! Thank god we get Bravo!!

My buddy Jen sent me the URL to a fun website this morning http://www.sexualpositionsfree.com/index.html It's a site that shows all different sexual positions demonstrated by those funny jointed faceless (and anatomically void) mannequin dolls. It has tons of positions that I'd never heard of, and even positions for orgies!! Wheeee!! It's reference material for the lemon writer!!

Speaking of buddies, I've got my first non-anime buddy on blurty!! Yaaay!! One of my very closest net friends finally got a journal yesteday!! Manu (aka Korrigan) has been one of my best friends for four years, and is the first of my vamp family to come into the wonderful world of web journals. Welcome, Manu!! You'll get addicted!! And yes, she already has the link to the hex color chart, and changed her colors!!

Got another new buddy on LJ, her name is Nomi, and she is writing one of the SWEETEST Duo x Heero series!! Her fics will soon be on The Vault, as she is allowing PG to host them. She is also writing an A/U in which Duo is an angel, Heero has just committed suicide and is in his care, and a sexy Wu-demon is fighting Duo for Heero. Yuuuuuuum!!! Again, this will be on The Vault, so look for it there!!

When I first started my blurty, I was recommending fics all the time, and I seem to have gotten away from that, but there are two GW fics that I HAVE to recommend!! I think every fandom obviously has their own goddesses, and while I've found many amazing GW authors, I think Blue Soaring fits into the realm of GW Goddess. She writes some of the most GORGEOUS lemons I've ever read, the one in her vampire fic absolutely blew me away!! So first, I'm recommending the vampire fic, Blurry Moon, which is Duo as the vamp, and Heero as his chosen mate. I do love Duo on top!! DAMN is this fic sexy!! It's totally A/U, so nothing even resembling a mecha or a Preventers uniform will be found here, and they are actually 24 years old (which is odd when I'm used to them being teenagers), and Duo wears that gorgeous hair DOWN throughout most of the fic. Of course Duo turns Heero, and you've GOT to read his first feeding!! GAH!!! SO FUCKING SEXY!!!

The second fic is even MORE amazing than the first, although I really love the lemon in Blurry Moon. Dance With The Demons is AMAZING, though, and is all the boys, rather than just Duo and Heero. The premise is that Duo is a slayer in a world that is overrun with "monsters" and he is summoned by the Erus Animis (which means "master of my soul" ~shivers~) to enlist his aid in finding out who is having their own clan of monsters killing humans. That doesn't really do the story justice, but it's the best I can do right now. Anyway, Heero and a very sleazy Quatre (GOD I love a sleazy Quatre!!!!!!) are vampires, and in positions of power. Wufei and Trowa are shape shifters whose other form is that of black panther. They are both "pets" and oh my GOD are they the sexiest pets this side of Riki!!! Even sexier, even, since they are sex crazed felines (no, there's no bestiality!!!). God, this is BY FAR the sexiest Wuffers I've ever read!! I can't even BEGIN to tell you the things I'd like to do that Wu-cat!! He's the epitome of submissive-with-an-attitude. These are BOTH fics that I intend to beg for to put on the Vault, although I'm a little intimidated by amazing authors!! It's always hard to approach them, although I should know from past experience that my shyness is usually unfounded. Yaoi authors tend to be some of the friendliest people I've ever known, although there are always exceptions to that rule.

Oh, would you like the links? LOL Here is Blue Soaring's page on Raygun Works... http://www.raygunworks.net/blue.html There are a lot of her fics there. I also recommend the "Nagging Duo" series...all are PWPs.

Which brings me to my next subject!! LOL I FINALLY figured out what UST means (unresolved sexual tension) but what the hell does TWT mean? Anyone care to enlighten me?

Ok, I've rambled far long enough!!

current mood: chipper

(2 screams |scream for me)

Wednesday, August 6th, 2003
6:57 am
Oooooooh!! I love this one! Stolen from Nomi...

I am the Siren

A man is often secretly oppressed by the role he has to play - by always having to be responsible, in control, and rational. The Siren is the ultimate male fantasy figure because she offers a total release form the limitations of his life. In her presence, which is always heightened and sexually charged, the male feels transported to a realm of pure pleasure. In a world where women are often too timid to project such an image, learn to take control of the male libido by embodying his fantasy.

Symbol: Water. The song of the Siren is liquid and enticing, and the Siren herself is fluid and ungraspable. Like the sea, the Siren lures you with the promise of infinite adventure and pleasure. Forgetting past and future, men follow her far out to sea, where they drown.

What Type of Seducer are You?
created by polite_society

(scream for me)

Thursday, July 31st, 2003
1:24 am
Oooh, one more thing!! I'm in love again!! I FINALLY got to see Yoko Kurama on YYH today!! ~drowns in drool~ DAMN!!! How GORGEOUS is that demon??? ~sigh~ I hope we get to see a hell of a lot more of him!! And how about Hiei's reaction to his transformation? You know, no one can possibly argue to me that there isn't a romantic relationship between the two of them, it's so damn obvious!!

OH!! And I watched DBZ today, and did anyone else notice that when Goku got out of the tank, his first thought was that he could go help "VEGETA and the others"????? He didn't mention HIS SON, he said VEGETA!!! ~laughs~

current mood: amused
current music: It's Just Love ~ Gundam Wing

(2 screams |scream for me)

1:22 am
Ok, when I got the LJ, I wasn't going to post the same things on it as on Blurty, but since I do have different people going to each one, I'm doing another duplicate posting.

It's been so incredibly hot here, with the A/C being broken for over a week now. Found out tonight that the guy won't be here to put in the new one until NEXT WEDNESDAY!! I've been taking the kids to Mom's house during the daylight hours, because I CANNOT handle the heat, and NEED air conditioning. I'll be taking the laundry over with us tomorrow, because the appliances are just off the kitchen, and running the dryer makes this house about twice as hot as it already is. We live in a ranch style brick house, with no basement, so the heat just spreads to the rest of the house.

Spending the days at Mom's makes my little bit of computer time even smaller. When I DO get to be on the computer at night, I'm ravenously reading GW fics. However...


I have so many freakin' e-mails to answer that it is frightening!! I'm caught up with journals as much as I'm going to be, now. I'm going to do a mailbox at a time, starting with my Verizon mailbox. My first priority is to catch up with my vamp family, since I've known and loved them all for just over four years now, and I have been horrifically neglectful of them lately. I'll do DBZMOM94 mailbox next, then Saiyajin_Raven69, then finally mad_about_yaoi, since it's got the most to respond to. So depending on which mail box anyone has written to, there you know the order of how soon I MIGHT get to it.

I've got a list a mile long of GW fics that I want to beg for to put on The Vault, but very often when I write authors, I tend to strike up friendships with them. I want to catch up with all my current friends before I strike up new friendships, so there is another reason I'm determined to get through e-mail. I just know a lot of people are peeved with me, or feel that I'm ignoring their e-mails, but I truly don't mean to. I tend to procrastinate, and think I'll do it tomorrow, but then "tomorrow" is always crazy full, and I end up just reading when I'm sitting here. ~sighs~ I say it again, I can't wait for kindergarten to start!!

Ok, I'm off to work on e-mail now!! Wish me luck!!

current mood: determined
current music: Rhythm Emotion ~ Gundam Wing

(scream for me)

Wednesday, July 30th, 2003
4:30 am
I'm actually going to post this message on both of my journals, so sorry for the repeat for those of you who read blurty and LJ.

So I said back in 2000 that I'd never watch reality programming again. I gave birth to my daughter at 6:22 pm. I rushed it, because one of the final episodes of the first Big Brother would be on at 7, and I couldn't miss it. Really. Ask my hubby.

So all this time I've avoided the "reality" shows, but just after one episode of Boy Meets Boy, I know I'll be in front of my TV every Tuesday night till it's over. I think the entire thing is entirely shitty, because there are apparently several straight men who are there to PRETEND to be gay, and if a straight man is chosen by the sweet, adorable "leading man" they will win a cash prize for their deceipt. That sucks. Already, I love James. He's too damn cute for his own good. Sweet, romantic, looking for true love, completely unknowing that they are trying to deceive him. Just horrible, but I'll be here till the end. I REALLY hope he chooses well. Let's see if I can be cool and link to a picture of James...

There are three that in my opinion are straight. Those would be the Marc, the oldest guy, who's a lawyer
Darren, the guy that looks like Doogie Howser

; and Sean, the artist who gave him a CD when they first did the intros
The one guy who is the most flamboyant, Dan, my hubby thinks is straight, and just acting, because he's TOO good.
OOOOH, I just looked at his bio, and he IS an actor!! Hubby may be right!!

So far, my favorites are Michael (the tall gangly one with sparkly brown eyes),

Matt, who's just too pretty for his own good (his bio says he's 6'5" tall!!),

and Wes, who has a sweet smile, and seems very genuine.

I think Robb and Franklin are both adorable, too, but I'm uncertain as to whether they are gay or straight. Not picturing them, just cause I'm lazy.

I'd be in front of Bravo on Tuesday nights, anyway, because my new favorite non-anime show is DEFINITELY Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. I laughed SO hard over that tonight!! Such an adorable show!! I LOVE Jai, the culture guy, and Carson, the FLAMBOYANT fashion guy just KILLS ME!! I love all the guys, though. They are such a team!! I love how they taunt the straight guys, and how they just all work together...then at the end, they sit together on a couch to watch how their work panned out, and they are all so cute with their comments they throw out. They are always touching each other, too, so of course this rabid yaoi fangirl eats that up with a spoon!!

Anyone who hasn't heard of these two shows can check them out at http://www.bravotv.com

(4 screams |scream for me)

Sunday, July 27th, 2003
3:09 pm - Yes, I have an LJ
http://www.livejournal.com/users/mad_about_yaoi/ Thanks to Xe, I now have an LJ too! Wheee!! I can use SIX icons at once, rather than just three!! I just made a gorgeous Wufei for the other one. Now when I like an icon/page design (such as this one, Quatre is just so pretty, and I love the colors!!) I don't have to change it when I make another icon that I like!! Yaaay!!

I've got Cyn, Windy and Kaia on my friends list over there...anyone else have LJs that I can add? ^.^

(1 scream |scream for me)

11:32 am - Unf*ckingbearable
As I mentioned before, our A/C is broken. I'm MELLLLLLLLLLTING!!! Won't be around today, taking the kids to Moms. I CANNOT handle this heat!!!! That tells you how desperate I am, that I'm willing to spend the day at the most boring place on Earth, COMPLETELY devoid of boysmut. I'm an oven on my own...I'm always hot, even when everyone else is cold. This is KILLING me, man!!!

I'll start begging for GW fics when I'm in a friendlier mood. Otherwise, my letters will sound like they came from Katy K. "Loved your fics. Can we have 'em? Write more soon. Bye!"

Cynthia, I am SOOOOOO SORRRRRRY that I never wrote you when I got the CDs!!! They came on Wednesday, and Johnathan is in on his computer watching the FF AMVs as I type this! He LOVES them!! Of course, I can't keep myself away from the Gundam Wing pics. LOL Lots more icon and wallpaper fodder!! Yaaaaay!! And THANK YOU for the case!!! I REALLY needed another one!!! Yippee!!!

Ok, getting ready to go to moms as soon as I read at least one one-shot to get me through the day.

(scream for me)

Saturday, July 26th, 2003
4:52 pm
Ok, so the thought occurred to me that my two favorite animes both have five main bishies, so I decided to try to pair each of them with the bishie from the other anime that matched them best. Bear with me here.

The most obvious pairing first: Tsuzuki X Duo. Not necessarily in that order, I think either one could be seme in that pairing, as I don't adhere to the feminine Duo that it seems so many authors do. Just because he has long hair, that doesn't make him girly. ~huffs~ These two go together so well because they are cut from the same mold. Both are purple eyed bishies who hide their painful childhood/past behind an infectious smile, and easy going attitude. Both have boundless energy, both are very emotional, even though they hide it well, and both are the cohesive agent that keep their respective teams going. Everybody loves both of them.

Now this may look like I'm pairing them by eye color, but even if they didn't both have green eyes, I'd put Trowa and Hisoka together. These two quiet boys would probably just sit around, each reading their own books and never saying anything to one another, but I think they are good together because Trowa could be strong for Hisoka when his emotions run away with him. Trowa is DEFINITELY seme.

Now with pairing Muraki, we're going to assume that he is NOT going to kill his beloved Perfect Soldier, so don't think I'm trying to kill Heero off. LOL I think Heero is best suited of all the pilots to put up with Muraki, and I think that secretly he'd enjoy the role of uke to a very powerful (and BEAUTIFUL) man. I also think he'd enjoy all the attention that Muraki would give him, even if he denied it.

Next would be Wuffers and Tatsy. Both immensely powerful, extremely intelligent men with a strong sense of right and wrong. I think these two are extremely passionate, as well, and this would make a fiery pair. Tatsy would be seme.

The last pair is the least likely to succeed, just because they are together by process of elimination. They don't really GO together...I think it's more likely that Watari would be employed by Quatre. LOL If they WERE together, I think they'd just hang around with Trowa and Hisoka, and trade off partners every so often.

(1 scream |scream for me)

2:11 pm - Sucker for Questionnaires...
Got this from McLachlan. Cynthia, I expect to see this on YOUR blurty by tomorrow. ~snickers~

Ten things that annoy you:

1. Narrow/closed minded people
2. Wal-Mart
3. Drivers who take right corner turns at 3 mph
4. Infomercials
5. Boy bands
6. When the VCR eats a tape
7. Bad spelling/grammar
8. Ignorance (should be number one, but I'm too lazy to renumber)
9. Running out of printer ink in the middle of printing something
10. Smelly public bathrooms

Nine things you wear daily:

1. Glasses/contacts
2. Undies
3. pants
4. shirt
5. Crest White strips
6. barrette/scrunchie
7. jammies
8. toe ring
9. A cheesy grin

Eight movies you'd watch over and over:

1. Clue
2. Clash of the Titans
3. Princess Bride
4. Airplane
5. Top Secret
6. Vampire Journals
7. Steel Magnolias
8. Sister Act 2

Seven albums that you have that don't matter:

1. Mariah Carey
2. Whitney Houston
3. N'Sync
4. Reba McIntire
5. Garth Brooks
6. Britney Spears
7. Christina Aguilera
For the record, those are all HUBBY's albums. ALL of mine matter!!

Six objects you touch every day:

1. Keyboard
2. Mouse
3. TV
4. toilet ~laugh~
5. bed
6. my kids

Five things you do every day:
1. read fan fics
2. bitch and moan about not getting enough sleep
3. keep my children from killing one another
4. make blurty icons
5. drool over bishies

Four foods that you couldn't live without:

1. I survive on caffeine free diet Coke, does that count as food? ~takes a drink~
2. Papa John's Pizza
3. Ham salad
4. Oreos...any kind

Three of your favorite songs at this moment:

1. Who Will Love Me, Now? by PJ Harvey (GOD I LOVE THAT SONG!!)
2. Bring Me To Life by Evanescence (or however the hell you spell their name)
3. Attack of the Gabber Robots by Laziest Men on Mars (I have a GW AMV to that song, and I LOVE it!)

Two people that have influenced your life the most:

1. Johnathan
2. Jessica

One thing you could spend the rest of your life with:

1. My Computer

Have you ever...
01. Fallen for your best friend? No
02. Made out with JUST a friend? No
03. Been rejected? Yes
04. Been in love? Yes
05. Been in lust? Absolutely
06. Used someone? Yes
07. Been used? Yes
08. Cheated on someone? No
09. Been cheated on? Yes
10. Been kissed? NEVER! ~snerk~
11. Done something you regret? All the time

Who was the last person...

12. You touched? Jessica
13. You talked to? Johnathan
14. You hugged? Jessica
15. You instant messaged? Danni
16. You kissed? Hubby
18. You yelled at? Johnathan
19. You laughed with? Both kids a few minutes ago
20. You had a crush on? Various shinigami, gundam pilots, bouncy singers, sexy guitarists, and cranky novelists
21. Who broke your heart? My heart is fully intact

Do you...

22. Color your hair? Monthly
23. Have tattoos? Still want one
24. Piercings? three holes in my ears
25. Have a boyfriend/girlfriend/both? The greatest hubby on the face of the Earth.
26. Floss daily? Yup.
27. Own a webcam? No.
28. Ever get off the damn computer? I'm not on it NEARLY as much as I'd like to be!
29. Sprechen sie deutsche? Nein
30. Habla espanol? No

Have you/do you/do you have...

40. Considered a life of crime? No.
41. Considered being a hooker? No.
42. Considered being a pimp? No.
43. Dream of mutilated bodies, blood, death, gore? Sometimes. I've had VERY scary dreams revolving around Majin Buu and Cell.
44. Dream of doing those things instead of just seeing them? No, I'm usually the one hiding under a bed.
45. If you could be anywhere, where would you be? On a cruise ship.
46. What would you be doing? I'd be drunk, I can tell you that much!
47. What are you listening to? NIN Pretty Hate Machine
48. Can you do anything freakish with your body? I don't think so
49. Chicken or fish? Chicken, unless the fish is from Long John Silver's.

Current Clothes: An Old Navy T-shirt.
Current Mood: Hot and bitchy
Current Music: Didn't I just answer that?
Current Taste: ummm...caffeine free diet coke
Current Hair: Ummm...brown, past my shoulders, messy.
Current Annoyance: Broken A/C
Current Smell? none, really
Current thing I ought to be doing: working on e-mail
Current Desktop Picture: A pretty pic of Gundam Wing boys
Current Favorite Group: Always favorite groups are Depeche Mode, NIN, Bauhaus and REO
Current Book: Gundam Wing Blind Target
Current DVD In Player: YnM dub Vol 4

Current Refreshment: caffeine free diet coke...geez, how many times are they going to ask?
Current Worry: Lack of sleep.
Current Crush: Various bishies mentioned before


Food: Oreos
Drink: Boone's Farm Sangria (I refuse to type the same soda again)
Color: Black, blue, purple and silver
Shoes: I despise shoes
Candy: Hmm...Snickers Cruncher, I suppose
Animal: Birds
TV Show: Crossing Over with John Edward, Trading Spaces (never get to watch either of them, though)
Movie: ??? Didn't I already answer this?
Dance: I don't
Vegetable: Potatoes
Fruit: Bananas


Understanding: I certainly try to be
Open-minded: Without a doubt.
Arrogant: Used to be, but I hope I'm not anymore
Insecure: Totally
Interesting: ~scratches head~ Not really.
Hungry: Nope.
Friendly: I think so.
Smart: Average
Moody: Moreso than I used to be
Childish: I try to be whenever possible
Independent: Nope, I'm totally co-dependent
hard working: No
Organized: Not anymore, I used to be anal about it, though.
Healthy: Pretty much
Emotionally Stable: No, I cry over EVERYTHING
Shy: Depends on the situation
Difficult: Not at all.
Attractive: Nope, getting old.
Bored Easily: Not really.
Thirsty: Nope ~takes another drink of CFDC~
Responsible: Sadly, I have way more responsibilities than I'd like to.
Sad: Not at the moment
Happy: Not at the moment
Trusting: blindly
Talkative: Yuppers
Original: They broke the mold
Lonely: Always


Kill: I'm not that violent.
Slap: I can't think of anyone right now.
Look Like: Gwen Stefani
Be Like: I have no clue. Someone rich, yet not famous.
Talk To Offline: Stacy
I HAVE: a headache
I WANT: to go to sleep
I LOVE: my family
I HATE: broccoli
I FEAR: being alone
I FEEL: like a nut
I HEAR: Kids playing hide and seek
I CRAVE: sleep
I WONDER: if my kids will ever go to bed

YOU SMILED? Ummm...a few minutes ago.
LAUGHED? Bout an hour ago, I have funny kids.

BOUGHT SOMETHING? Made the weekly trip to Wal-Mart yesterday. My cart runneth over.
DANCED? Two weeks ago
WERE SARCASTIC? can't remember
CRIED? Last night
HAD A NIGHTMARE? Can't remember.
HUGGED SOMEONE? A few minutes ago
LAST BOOK YOU READ? Gundam Wing: Episode Zero about an hour ago
LAST SONG YOU HEARD? Something I Can Never Have by NIN
LAST THING YOU ATE? a biscuit with fake spray butter


SMOKE? Never
SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? Nope, but I sleep with two body pillows
HAVE ANY BAD HABITS? I have A LOT of bad traits, but can't think of any bad habits
TAKE WALKS IN THE RAIN? I don't take walks, but if I'm caught in rain, it doesn't bother me.
HAVE ANY SCARS? A chicken pox scar on my cheek, a bow-tie shaped burn scar on my right wrist, and a few random injury scars on my knees.
QUESTION OF THE DAY: Can you hear me now?

(scream for me)

2:54 am
I should really be in bed, but I needed to feed my GW obsession a little more tonight. I was without internet connection until about 8pm, so wasn't able to read ANYTHING all day!! ACK!! The HORROR!! I'm going back over the fics in history that I've read over the past few days and saving the ones that I REALLY loved in order to beg the authors to allow them to be hosted on The Vault as soon as Danni gets the GW page up & running. I've got 7 set aside already, in addition to the knowledge that I'll be begging Windy, KC and Kaia to host some of theirs as well!!!! ^.^

Since I had no internet connection today, I made a bunch of GW wallpapers and icons (isn't Quatre adorable?), so will send the icons your way soon, Danni.

I can't post on here without making some mention of the terrible sadness of the yaoi community losing a wonderful member, although I feel like such a hypocrite mentioning Liz when I never took the time to write her personally when everything first started falling apart in her life. My heart feels so heavy when I think about it. You know, I just cannot fathom what she is living through right now. My husband supports me and shows me nothing but love and acceptance no matter what I do or don't do. I very often question how he puts up with me, when I spend every moment that I can sitting here at this desk reading about bishies getting it on, while the house falls apart around me. He works 65+ hours a week, and still does more housework than I do, and I'm here 24/7. So it just baffles me how a husband could be so unfeeling about what makes his wife happy...how she manages to escape the confines of her own domestic prison by expressing herself creatively...and he can just forcibly take that away from her. Not only forcing her to stop writing, but threatening her with taking her children away from her because of it! We can all only hope that she gets herself and her boys as far away from that controlling, hateful man as soon as possible. What a terrible shame.

Ok, I suppose I should get to bed. Our A/C broke down a couple of days ago, and while we are really having lovely weather for this time of year, it's still too hot to be without A/C. The heat and humidity just really zap what little energy I have. We're going to get a new unit, plus a new furnace, but are at the mercy of the schedule of the private contractor who will be doing it for us. He said it could be as long as two weeks!! It only got up to 83 today, but it was 86 in the house!! I hope the nice weather holds out for the next few days, the fair starts Sunday, and I'd love to be able to take Johnathan for a couple of hours.

(scream for me)

2:53 am - Had to take this one!
The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Second Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)Moderate
Level 2 (Lustful)Very High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)Moderate
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)Very Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)Low
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)Low
Level 7 (Violent)High
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)Low

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

(scream for me)

1:06 am
Ok, there are 80 million quizzes that I want to do, but I'm just going to steal Windy's for now, cause they are YnM!!

Killed by Cannibalism
...Darn Neko lover...Come over for dinner tonight!

Yami no Matsuei: What way would Muraki murder you?
brought to you by Quizilla

This was NOT a big surprise:
Your ideal man is ... Yutaka Watari! An eccentric,
intelligent scientist! You like originality,
ne? Do you mind if your man has better hair
then you, and being a test subject? If not,
you'll have fun with this fun-lovin' guy!
Take a test tube and join the fun!

Who's Your Ideal 'Yami no Matsuei' Man?
brought to you by Quizilla

Watari x Tsuzuki

Yami no Matsuei: Which Tsuzuki x ? Pairing Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

(scream for me)

Sunday, July 20th, 2003
2:24 pm
I said I was going to do e-mail on my last journal entry, but anyone who comes to look at this thingy should know by now that I didn't do it. ~sighs and hangs head~ I have SO much to answer, so many list mails, so many private mails, I have reviews that I need to leave, and of course I still have the fic club fic o' the week to read.

First and foremost on my list of e-mails to write is to Liz. I can't even begin to apologize enough for not having written yet. I should be writing that e-mail right now, rather than writing here, but that WILL be my first letter that I send today. I realize that I have been the most horrible, least supportive friend that I could possibly be to you right now...well, that's all best left said in the letter, not here publicly.

I need to write McLachlan, too. She left the sweetest message to me in her A/N for her latest chapter, and I just got a mail from her asking if I was upset with her, or if she'd done something wrong because I haven't written in so long. I also haven't been leaving reviews, and I have no excuse for any of that. Sweetheart, if you read this, I'll be writing YOU today, too!! Gomen nasai.

I need to write letters back to Chanchan, Windy, Yanagi, Laekin, Rinoa, Lothlorien, Julie, Manu, Koryuu...god the list goes on!! ~sighs~ I've got a baby congrats to send, too, that's at least 3 days late.

The sad thing is, that the reason I'm so far behind is this damned obsession with Gundam Wing. It's eating me alive, I swear to God!! All I do is read and collect pics, and make occasional icons. I wake up in the middle of the night, and the first thought in my head is "I could just go read a little one shot, and not miss too much sleep!" Did that last night, ended up reading for almost two hours, and here I sit trying to stay awake because I've had less than three hours of sleep! If it isn't bad enough that my daughter doesn't allow me to sleep, there I was taking away precious hours that I could be snoozing just to read boy smut!! ~sighs~

I've got just short of 450 pics of GW on my disk, so plenty of icon fodder. ~points to new icon~ Just made that one a few minutes ago. I was determined that I WAS NOT going to be a fan of Duo when I came into the fandom, but my plan failed. I love him. He's too damned adorable not to love. I didn't think I'd like Quatre, either, but same thing...just too damn cute to not love him. Anyway, expect a bunch of new icons to come your way soon, Danni. And you NEED to be reading those fics that I sent you links to, if you haven't already, so that Windy isn't the only one that is being subjected to my rambling about GW!! The poor girl seems to be on her way out of the fandom, and here I am spouting how excited I am about pairings that she's sick of!! That's like me trying to listen to someone being all enthusiastic about Goku X Vegeta!!! Poor Windy! ~glomps poor Windy~ LOL I say "poor Windy" as I deliberately try to con Danni into being my GW sounding board!! I'll be saying "poor Danni" soon!!

I refuse to join any GW MLs, just because I'm already on more than I can handle. I can't keep up with my OWN lists, there is no way I'm going to even attempt to add anymore to my mailboxes. I've already got ~counts~ 18 sites bookmarked to go back and read fics on, so I'll be busy enough.

God, I spent the whole day crying yesterday. First of all, I read this HORRIBLE (but obviously well written, or it wouldn't have affected me so strongly) series, WITHOUT knowing in advance that it was a deathfic that had me sitting in the corner of the bed SOBBING hysterically!! The author not only killed Duo in a horrific way, but she killed off Quatre and Trowa, too!! HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU KILL THREE MAIN CHARACTERS???????????? And of course in killing Duo, she tortured the living hell out of Heero in the meantime. And she MAIMED Wufei!!! God!! It was HORRIBLE!!! ~has traumatic flashbacks~

Then, last night I read a 3x4 where Quatre died (I knew in advance that it was a deathfic, though, so I was more prepared), and sat and sobbed again. This one was done so beautifully, though. Ended up being a 3x2, but with no disrespect to Quatre's memory. It was really beautiful, but god, I've cried enough, I need some good lemons today!! I did find the fic that I'm going to recommend when my turn comes up in the fic club...it's HILARIOUS!!! Lemony, funny, not too long, you don't really need any background info for the show, either, just need to know what the characters look like, and you can pretty much read from there.

I was surfing some sites this morning, and ran across a 3x4 shrine and decided to sit and read some there, and I actually got pissed because all the fics not only had that pairing, but had the rest of the pilots paired with WOMEN!! ~gasps in horror~ Apparently that author sees Quatre and Trowa as being the only gay couple in the show, so had Heero with Relena, Duo with Hilde, and Wufei with Sally. I think that's the main reason that I haven't watched anymore of the episodes than two, just because I know that there are too damned many female characters. There's a plus for YnM...there are two females in the show, and one is killed and the other is in love with her own partner, so no pesky women to get in the way of the yaoiness.

I read a fic the other day that had a REALLY good explanation for all of the boys being involved with each other...she said that being homosexual was one of the reasons that they were each chosen to be pilots, because the powers that be feel that men who have families and children won't have the drive to sacrifice themselves for their cause, therefore aren't as effective as soldiers as gay men are. Made sense to me.

On another note, to prove how addicted I've become to GW, I've had at least three dreams about the characters!! The one that I remember most vividly is where the guys were living at the house that I grew up in as a tempory safe house, but I was living there too. They were all going to be home any minute, and I was totally stressing out that I didn't have the kitchen cleaned up yet, absolutely panicked about it, but Quatre was the first to get home, and he just walked in and started helping me clean. ~laughs~ It was like Snow White and the 5 sexy Gundam Pilots, or something. Sounds stupid, but I did wake up and laugh about it at the time.

Ok, nice GW novel, ne? I'm going to go work on e-mail, now!!!

(2 screams |scream for me)

Friday, July 18th, 2003
11:38 am
I am GOING to do e-mail today, I swear to god!! I'm my usual week behind. I know I've got over 60 to answer in just my mad_about_yaoi mailbox, and I have no clue about the other mailbox, not to mention all the blurtys that I want to respond to!! I really need to get in the habit of answering daily. I used to answer mail as soon as I received it, I don't know when I started letting it stack up, just to sit down and answer it all in one several-hour long swoop. It would take a hell of a lot less time if I just kept up with it!

One hindrance, of course, is the bored five year old who is watching Bob the Builder as I type this. I can't wait for kindergarten to start. I will have SO much time!! The monitor on his computer went kablooey a few weeks ago, so we just got a new (used) one. Then decided that it would work so much better if we had the thing reformatted, so one of hubby's employees took the thing home with him, and did it. Got it back, and the sound card isn't working, and neither is the CD ROM drive. This means that the kids have to watch AMVs on MY computer all the time. I've d/led a ton of GW AMVs, and Johnathan is addicted to them.

On the note of GW, I finally started watching the eps that Cyn sent me, and after only seeing two of them, I hate Relena with an all encompassing passionate loathing. She's worse than Chi Chi, just in a very different way. Thank God the eps are on tape, so I can just fast forward through her!! UGH!!

I went manga shopping the other day...got FAKE volume two, Under The Glass Moon, Petshop of Horrors vol 1, GW Episode Zero, and GW Blind Target. FAKE was awesome, some really good kissing scenes. I LOVED Episode Zero, because it's basically just background info on all the important characters (needless to say, I skipped the Relena section! ~scowls~). I'm glad to finally know who the Maganacs are! Haven't had a chance to read any of the others yet. I really need to get my new scanner hooked up, so I can scan some pics from FAKE, and some pics from Ep Zero of Wufei with his hair down.

Ok, I need to do e-mail and blurtys, read the fic recommended this week in the fic club, and make some more icons today. LOL That's a never ending obsession.

OH GOD! Before I forget, any GW fans have GOT to go to this site!! Some of the most GORGEOUS GW fan art that I've seen so far, with some drop dead gorgeous NC17 material!! ~wipes drool from chin~ I'm in the middle of reading her fanfiction, too. The author/artist's name is Ponderosa, and her art is gorgeous, and her fics are WONDERFUL! She actually keeps the guys MALE (except when they are cross dressers, but that's another story all together), and doesn't have dialog that sounds like it's pulled directly from Hallmark's Sickeningly Sappy collection. Anyway, here's the link... http://www.dragonworld.com/ponderosa/index.html It's pretty much all 1x2, but there is some good art with the other guys, some entirely droolworthy pics of Wufei, for example. Windy, I keep meaning to tell you that I've seen the light. While I still love 3x5, I've moved over to the 2x5 camp. They make a much cuter couple, don't they? I've read several 1x2x5 fics that I LOVE, too...I'm such a sucker for threesomes!!

Ok, I'm going to go finish the fics at Ponderosa's site, then I swear to god I'm gonna tackle my mailboxes!!

(3 screams |scream for me)

Tuesday, July 15th, 2003
7:35 am
Geez, I haven't blurty'd for awhile! Haven't done much of anything for awhile, actually. So far behind on my e-mail, the usual lament. ~sighs~

Changed my page again, to reflect my further submersion into the GW fandom. Isn't Wufei pretty? I guess I'm officially a GW fan girl, now that my icon is Wufei, and my desktop background is a pic of all the boys. I've made a few GW icons if you want some, Windy! Or anyone else for that matter! LOL

This is the main reason I've been so silent on here, lately. Any free minute I have had over the past four days has been spent reading a series that blew me the f*ck out of the water. It's called Companions of Fate, by Laekin, and can be found here: http://gwaddiction.com/Laekin.shtml Even if you aren't a GW fan, if you've got a few days with some free time, I cannot possibly recommend this enough. You WILL be a GW fan after reading this. The depth of this series is...gods I can't even come up with words powerful enough to describe it. She gets into the heads (and hearts) of these characters in a way that you feel that they are real people. The relationships between the boys are sweet and romantic, but still REALISTIC...not all hearts and flowers and poetry as some authors tend to go overboard with. I was awestruck. Her story lines SHOULD have been a part of the show, they were so detailed and well thought out. I finished the series yesterday morning, but it hasn't left me yet, I keep going over scenes in my head as I try to catch up on the things that I neglected as I was reading.

And ya wanna know the kicker? I wrote to Laekin to praise her, one of my usual epic rambling e-mails (ME, ramble? ~gasp~ NEVER!! ~snorts~), and not only did she respond the same morning, but her response was not only gracious, but chatty and friendly, too! You know, I tend to think that authors that have such a massive talent must be the most arrogant, cold, hard to reach people (although my theory has been proven wrong many times), so her response blew me (pleasantly) away. She and Windy are the only two authors from the GW fandom that I have contacted, and both of them I first knew of from the YnM fandom (Laekin is writing an AMAZING YnM series called Gray Knight that is Tatsy X Tari centric), and both of them sent the most wonderful responses. Is this the rule? Are all fans of both YnM and GW just absolutely wonderful people? Hmmm...I'll have to research this theory.

So aside from my massive GW obsession, here's my past few days since I have been incommunicado:

Saturday was THE most fun!! It isn't often that hubby and I get to go on a DATE, so just being able to go somewhere together without chibis is a major treat. One of his ex-employees has cancer, and a benefit was held for her that went from 2pm to 11pm. He came home from work around 2 and packed up the kids and took them, letting me get some sleep (yes, I'm back on the no sleep cycle again, dammit). He came home around 6 after dropping the kids off at Mom's house, and we got ready and went back. They had raffles, an auction (I got a 60.00 facial for 20 bucks, and a tanning package for 20 bucks also. He got this adorable set of lighthouses and birdhouses for outside for 30 bucks), two live bands and ALCOHOL!! LOL I just kept buying sodas, and one of the gals that we sat with had bought a bottle of orange Smirnoff that she kept pouring into my cans. By the end of the night, almost half the bottle was gone, and I was the only one drinking it! Wheee!

We danced a bit (have I ever mentioned that I'm married to a dancer? He embarrasses me, because he's SO good, and I just stand there like a rhythmless dork in his shadow!), sat around shooting the shit with some of his other employees, and just had a really good time there, then we left and went to Steak n Shake to eat. Mmmmm!! After that, we went to Wal Mart for peace offerings for the kids so that they would forgive us for leaving them for the evening (those kids are SO SPOILED!). Got home, got to bed, and 20 minutes later, Jessica got up for her day at 1 am. So thank god hubby had let me sleep awhile!! It's not fun taking care of a 2 year old when your drunk AND exhausted!!

God, a bunch of other things that I wanted to talk about, but I really should work on my house. I did get the final YnM DVD yesterday, and watched it once hubby got home. Watari's voice was SOOO distracting!! Every time he opened his mouth, I had to cover my face and whine "It's soooooooo awful!!!" I think I annoyed hubby after the third or fourth time that happened. They changed some things. The worst of it was...everyone remember how often I've said I doubted that the English VA could handle Hisoka's emotional outburst in Touda's flames? Well, his "outburst" was all of about 2 sentences long!! They TOTALLY cut it up!!! I was SO disappointed!! ~huffs~ The rest of the eps were awesome, but the scene that SHOULD have been the most emotionally devastating was so anticlimactic, I didn't even cry!! I cry over EVERYTHING!! Hallmark commercials can level me to a sobbing mess in 30 seconds!! I SHOULD HAVE CRIED, DAMMIT! ~sighs~

Oh well, one look at the disaster area that is my kitchen should take care of my dry cheeks. Better go face it. Wish me luck. ~sighs dejectedly~

(5 screams |scream for me)

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