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Thank You [21 May 2004|12:23pm] [ mood | hopeful ] [ music | "Time To Say Goodbye" - Sarah Brightman ] Anyone who’s been reading my journal for a long time knows that my life and myself have changed a lot in the last two or three years. I’ve gone from being wildly depressed on a weekly basis to happy and content. I’ve gone from being and feeling absolutely hopeless as if there were no way out of the downward spiral I’d been in, to feeling as if just about anything is possible if I plan and try hard enough. A lot of hard work and introspection has gone into making these changes in my life, and yes, I’ve had help. It took years for me to accept the hand that would help me. Sometimes strength comes from knowing where our weaknesses lie. For the last year my life has undergone massive change. I’ve gone on a budget, started a weight loss program again, continued to fight my battle with smoking (mostly winning for months/years at a time), attempted to become more organized and neat, started selling Avon and continued with it (my one year anniversary is on the first week in July), found a working wonderful coven (becoming a Dedicant in June!), started paying off old bills, got a new apartment, lost friends, gained friends, started dating my best friend and we’re getting engaged soon, saved up for and got a ‘new’ car, and somehow managed to find that elusive happiness and contentment as a matter of course, instead of for fleeting moments. My clergy told me this weekend during our first mentoring session that a year ago she wouldn’t have touched me with a ten foot pole as a student. But seeing how much I changed, in her words “enormous change both externally and internally”, she is honored to have me become a part of her magickal family. It meant a lot to me to hear that. She shoots from the hip and is a very no nonsense woman. Things haven’t always been great, losing friends was hard. There’s a part of me that still regrets how that all went down. I became someone bitter and sick inside, despite my best efforts otherwise. Finally, like a cancer or gangrenous limb, that part of me had to be cut out. There’s this part though that’s started to sneak up on me again, a sort of “phantom limb” phenomenon. No matter how much I wish it weren’t so, there’s a part of me that still feels that pain of loss, and regrets. I know that there was no other way it could have all worked out, but I still feel it anyway. The thing is, it’s not helping me become a better person. The lesson is already there, painfully well learned, make no mistake. Continuing to pick at a scab is just silly, and it tends to sting. So what am I saying? I’m saying that it’s time to move on. I love my Blurty Journal, and some of the friends I’ve made here are wonderful. Amy, a physical friend, is as always a wonderful challenge to me. But I think it’s time to move on. If you’d like to contact me in the future, the email is Lunassa@hotmail.com Thank you for the help, the laughs, the advice, the challenges… the connection. I really appreciate it, thank you. 1 comment|post comment

Num nums [19 May 2004|12:52pm] [ mood | giggly ] [ music | "Ave Maria" - Charlotte Church ] I would first like to give a shout-out to Nancy aka “horrordiva” for making my morning today. :) Thank you for the heads up on the special package Nancy, you’re a sweetheart! I’m all tarted up today *hee hee*, every once in a while I get off my ass and wear something particularly cute to work. It’s never all that “appropriate” in the sense that it’s subdued and professional of course. But as they say in one of my favorite movies of all time “When are you going to learn that being normal is not necessarily a virtue?”. 5 phantom brownie points to the first person who leaves a comment on where the quote is from. I’ve got all the ingredients to make my special casserole and brownies for the pig roast this weekend. No, not those kind of brownies! You’re a naughty one, eh? This is the way I make my special brownies. First, I make up my brownie batter. While I’m doing that I’m heating in a frying pan a small package (about 2 cups) of frozen mixed berries. You keep stirring them as they heat up and start to bubble from the juices being released. You keep doing that until it becomes a chunky soupy mixture and then you keep ‘boiling’ it until it reduces to a syrupy (not quite so loose) mixture. Take it off the heat, then pour half your batter into the brownie pan, add the berries as a layer, and then top it with the rest of the brownie mix. If it’s too soupy it will take a long time to cook, so another way to do it if you don’t mind the top looking funky is to reserve the berry mix until the brownies are half cooked and then spreading them on top. This gives you more even results in cooking, but the top looks bizarre and I find that people are leery of it. Tastes DAMNED good though. My potato casserole is PURE comfort food. You cook one large potato per person you’re serving (it’s safe to say you’re going to cook 5-6 large potatoes). While they’re cooking chop up in to rough chunks (not minced) one large onion. If you have already chopped garlic like I do (godsend) you’ll be adding two teaspoons, or more if you’re like me. Chop up 1lb ham into ½” or so cubes. Now that the potatoes are done, you want to cut them up into roughly 1” cubes. Now you take all this and add it into a large casserole dish. Mix it up really well. Season to taste, I like to add a good amount of Adobo, it’s the good stuff. Then you add 1 cup milk (use your judgement since I eyeball stuff) and if you use sliced american cheese like I do, you add enough to cover the top of the potatoes. Put this in an oven at 400 degrees until it’s heated through and bubbly, about 20-30 minutes, stirring twice to mix it all up. You end up with a cheesy, gooey, pungent and absolutely divine bowl of potatoey hammy goodness. Mmmm. These are my own personal recipes, incorporating all my favorite things. 3 comments|post comment

Just Right :) [19 May 2004|07:54am] You are a Romantic Realist Okay, so you fall in the middle. You know that love isn't like a greeting card… Yet you can always find a greeting card to describe your feelings. You are the best of both worlds Girly yet independent, dreamy yet serious. Almost any guy can find balance with you. Are You Romantic or Realistic? Take This Quiz :-) Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance. post comment

Just A Little Something (Thanks Witchy) [18 May 2004|01:40pm] [ mood | full ] You're Element is Fire. You have a strong, independant, fiery personality and you obviously don't ley other's push you around. You like being in charge and don't care what other people think. In fact, you like to stand out and be yourself. You're probably shy when people first meet you but your a ball of energy that could explode at any given moment. You like to laugh and whether you admit it or not, you like to fight. You're peronality that is wild and untamable. You're beauty is physically fit and a little sexy and you have a very pretty face. What's Your Element(girls)? (PICTURES) brought to you by Quizilla 1 comment|post comment

Cuttin' The Cheese [18 May 2004|10:47am] [ mood | cheerful ] [ music | My boss talking to her kid on the phone. ] I have discovered a new yum today. There are many times leftovers in the kitchen here at work due to meetings and the like. Last night there was an after hours meeting for local residents to meet with our owners and they left the leftovers out/in the fridge. I pulled out the cheese and cracker platter and there was this FUGLY looking cheese on it. Round, white with a blue line going through the middle, and a white ‘rind’. It was soft, though it initially crumbled, you could spread it on a cracker. Now I usually HATE ‘real’ cheese. I’m an American cheese kind of gal. But this was really good! So that and some globe grapes and strawberries was my breakfast. Not too bad I think. This weekend is my parent’s pig roast, the monthly get together is at their house and it’s going to be lots of fun. Dad will fire up his homemade gas spit thingey, (really well done and tricked out), and everyone brings something tasty to eat. We don’t do a whole pig anymore, it’s just too much food, but we eat very well nonetheless. My clergy will be meeting my parents for the first time and I’m sure it will be nothing big due to how many people will be there and how busy they’ll be. I found out this weekend that my cousin Michael will be there, out from Colorado with is girlfriend. I haven’t seen him in years and years. I don’t think he made it my cousin Papo’s wedding (going down there was where we all almost died in the car accident). I like Michael, he was rough with us, but never malicious. Papo’s not to bad either, he might come as well with his wife and their two kids. Unfortunately, Mike’s father, my mother’s brother Richie will be there. I love his wife though, my Aunt Anne. She’s cool. So it’ll be interesting. Then the next weekend it’s my birthday party :) My brother sent me a package from Amazon, I was very surprised. He got me two books that I had on my wish list, “Ombria in Shadow” by Patricia McKillit (sp?), and “A Wiccan’s Bible” by A. J. Drew. I got them on Saturday, and I finished Ombria in Shadow yesterday afternoon. It was VERY good for those of you who like fantasy. I can’t wait to read more of her work! I’m starting the Wiccan book today. It was strange getting such great presents from him, usually we’re much more generic with each other’s gifts since we really don’t know each other very well. The wish lists make it easy. I did the right thing and called to thank him, but he was too busy to talk to me. He sounded very distracted, but then again he always does when I call. He was supposed to call me back but never did. I was grateful for the gifts though! 4 comments|post comment

Pleased [17 May 2004|10:01am] [ mood | pleased ] [ music | "Let's Dance" - David Bowie ] Monday’s not so bad, you know. While I would have preferred to sleep in until 9, I don’t mind being at work, at least for the moment. It makes such a huge difference when you like your job. Some may sneer at my job working as a receptionist, but I’ll tell you, the benefits in good mental health are bar none. I was wondering this morning when I was watching two robins cavorting in the tree outside the window, you know, I’ve neverseen birds mating. Other than chickens, who are rather obvious, you never see song birds getting it on. Why is that? I mean, trust me, I don’t care what they do, and how they do it, I just think it strange that you never see birds actually doing it, just the nests and the outcomes. Very strange :) Perhaps they’re shy. I goofed around with the digital camera this weekend though not as much as I would have liked. I posted a couple of pictures up to deviantart.com, I’m so happy to finally have something to put up there. Of course right now it’s all family album kind of stuff, nothing ‘artistic’ as it were. As I learn more about the camera and get out to find more interesting shots I’ll have more worthy work up. But for now I’m happy to clean up my snapshots and put them up there. I was given the link to the site years ago and have occasionally checked back in to browse the galleries, but now I’ve got something to contribute and it feels good. I’ve found some amazing photographers and digital artists…wow. You should definitely check it out. My page is http://lunassa.deviantart.com/ I hope that the link works. There’s not much up yet, but have patience. So all in all, after a good weekend that wasn’t too stressful, and a good movie last night (Van Helsing) I’m feeling quite splendid. The movie was fun, total eye candy, but not something I’d pay to see again. Gotta love those harpy brides :) Of course Hugh Jackman looks to die for in long hair, and I loved Kate Beckinsale. In that role she is EXACTLY what I look like on the inside, buried underneath layers of flesh of course. *grin* 2 comments|post comment

Thoughts on Money [14 May 2004|11:34am] [ mood | content ] I had posted this to Syrenmyst's (on my friend list) journal as a reply, but since it's important and relevant, I thought I'd post it as my thoughts for the day as well. So if it sounds funny, it's because it originally started out as a reply. (She was worried about me not being able to pay my bills and getting a new digital camera.) I know where you’re coming from, and I’m glad that you’re concerned for me. The problem is that in my excitement (and rush sometimes) when posting, sometimes I don’t give a completely accurate account of where I/we’re at. Up until we moved, for almost a year now, money’s been good. Not tons, not even so much as what you have saved up since we’re both in menial jobs, but not bad either. The cars were rough, having two cars for me die within the span of a year. But I’ve been learning how to save money, and Steve’s always had a small amount of savings. I’m learning good habits from him. When I said that we couldn’t go grocery shopping, that doesn’t mean that there was no food in the house. There was a full pantry, and cupboards stocked with food to eat. We just couldn’t go out and restock on the things we like to have in the fridge that are technically luxuries like my weight watchers ice cream at $4 a pop until our next paycheck. Steve has zero debt as of last week, the only debt he was carrying was his Best Buy card because he’s trying to build good credit. He finished paying off his purchase, and it was his plan not to make another (my camera) until he had finished that off. In fact, he was paying the bill off in large chunks. He never made a minimum payment the entire time, he budgeted to be able to take huge chunks off it every month. He paid off in 6 months what they wanted him to carry on the card (at a huge interest rate eventually) for 3 or 4 years. The reason we were denied the money for a car loan was because we don’t have a long enough credit history. I myself have never had a credit card in my life until last month. I’ve put $70 on it, and have the money put aside to pay it off as soon as it comes in. I also need to build good credit, and have been advised to get one small credit card and pay it off every month, so that’s what I’m doing. Even my dad agrees it’s a good thing! :) I have several small little debts that as of next week I’m in the process of starting to pay off ($29 to Gevalia…stuff like that from when I was younger). All told I should be done paying off my license and my very old small bills by the end of the summer. Steve’s gift to me, something I didn’t ask him for and he decided to get me, was something that he felt was a good idea. His Best Buy card has 2 years same as cash, so next month he’ll be paying it off in full when it comes in. We’re on a strict budget and make no purchases that we can’t afford when money’s tight. The good thing is that once this rough month is over (from moving and the car), in June we’ll be starting a saving’s account and putting upwards of $500-600 a month in it. And that’s after our spending money for each week! I’m really looking forward to it. So in the end, while yes, when I’m bugging out about money being tight because of one time things like moving and the car dying, we’re actually not doing so badly as I may have made it seem. Thank you for worrying about me, it’s good to know that there are people who care. I’m learning a lot about money, budgeting, and working as a team from Steve, and I have so much to be thankful for with him. We’ve come a long way, and are coming even further day by day. post comment

Aaaahh!! [13 May 2004|05:27pm] THE CAMERA IS ON IT'S WAY HOME! (just called Steve on the cell phone, he's leaving Albany with chicken wings and camera in tow) *happy dance* 1 comment|post comment

Po' Baby! (And A Maybe) [13 May 2004|11:17am] [ mood | hopeful ] [ music | "Control" - Poe ] Last night was an exercise in frustration. Best Buy called, the camera was on back order. Long story short, Steve called customer service because we paid for next day shipping and we’re not even getting it in the correct WEEK. They wouldn’t do a damned thing to refund the shipping charge, so we cancelled the $260 order and they were fine with that. Can you imagine? Being fine with losing a $260 order when refunding a $7 shipping charge would have kept the customer relatively happy? What shitty customer service. I called the Albany store today and they have THREE of the damned things in stock but they can’t hold it for more than 1 hour, so we have to hope and pray that when he calls at 4 (he leaves at 4:30) that they’ll still have one and will hold it for him. They said that they’ve sold 5 (other) cameras already today and they only opened an hour ago, so I’m not holding my breath. Who would have thought it would be so hard to spend money? *lol* Poor Steve, he had to have his big toe worked on last night by the podiatrist (gruesome, won’t go into details), so he’s got a big bandage around his rather large big toe. Tonight we’re supposed to go to a free Salsa lesson that one of the men I work with is holding here in town. I was so excited because Felix is an amazing dancer, but his studio and classes are in Albany so we just can’t make it up there every week. This is half a mile from our house, so it’s much more convenient. This is the initial free lesson, and then if there’s enough interest he’ll hold classes here in Catskill every week. It’s $70 for a couple for 8 weeks of lessons and I can’t wait! Unfortunately, now Steve’s not feeling well foot wise so he may have to sit it out. I don’t want to miss the class though, if only to watch and see how Felix teaches. It’s going to be packed, they’re already at max capacity for reserved spots and he thinks more people will just show up. Maybe one of them will need a partner for the evening? Steve says if his toe doesn’t hurt too much he’ll try. I can’t ask for more, and I don’t hold it against him. He didn’t want to go to the dr.’s office to begin with and I can’t blame him. 5 comments|post comment

Wiggle Wiggle [12 May 2004|03:24pm] [ mood | dorky ] [ music | "Haunted" - Poe ] Oh I’m so excited, I’m just fit to be tied. Speaking of tied, we need to put up my headboard and bed-frame eventually. Anyways! I’m excited because my digital camera is coming this week, should be here by Friday! I’m practically beside myself. I’ve wanted one for so long. I’ve got two new books on my wish list at Amazon.com about digital photography, I’m hoping that my friends or family will take a peek over there and perhaps pick them up for my birthday? Most likely I’ll end up buying them for myself once money’s not so tight, and that’s fine. I can’t wait to finally have content to post over on my deviantart.com account. I have some poetry up there, but since I don’t write often there’s not a whole hell of a lot there. I of course have more content than what is listed, but not all of it is good enough to post. The days are counting down until my birthday party/housewarming, and I have to say that yes, I’m just a tad excited. Lots of excited going around here. There’ll be around 10 people there which is about all we can seat in our apartment so it’s perfect. I have to sit down and really think about what I want to cook for my guests. I know for sure that I want to make some of the beer bread that I have mixes for. It’s from a company called Tastefully Simple. It’s kind of like a food Tupperware party. All you add is beer and then bake! They come out divine. I’d like to do shish kebabs I think. I’ve never done them before. I could get some sweet onions and peppers, and deep marinate some beef, pork, and chicken. I think that would be lovely. You know, I should check out Food Network, that website has awesome recipes. 2 comments|post comment

Breathe [10 May 2004|11:58am] [ mood | calm ] [ music | "Let's Get Loud" - Jennifer Lopez ] It’s Monday, and since I’m coming off of a four day weekend, I have to say that it’s rather painless! I thought it’d be depressing to come back to work after such a beautiful weekend and weather but nope, doin’ okay. It doesn’t hurt that the weather is gorgeous. I’m still not used to this beautiful weather, in a way it still feels like such a gift, which I guess it is. I did not finish my Mother’s Day cross-stitch project in time. The month of April was so busy with the move, and then being sick for two weeks before Sunday with burning, watering eyes made prolonged needlework impossible. I did bust ass on Friday night and all day Saturday, but just couldn’t do it. I’m about half way done. Mom and I had a spat on Saturday, and then she became violently ill later that day and was still sick yesterday so she asked me to come by later this week. She really made me feel like crap on Saturday so Steve was quick to point out to me how she always says “Ah! God punishes!” and he snickered. *grin* I’m staying out of that one. I framed the largest print from our first portrait to give her and I’ll show her how much I have done (55 hours worth) on the cross-stitch and give it to her ASAP. Sunday I visited with Amy and saw her new apartment. It was nice, and a big step up from her last place. She went from a very small apartment to a two bedroom with plenty of room for her to spread out and get comfortable. Amy treated me to lunch at Applebees and was it ever good! Bad thing was I’m not used to rich desserts and I made myself sick to my stomach trying to finish off the molten chocolate cake with vanilla icecream. It’s all her fault! *lol* Mom told me my brother wants to know what I want for my birthday and I started to tell her, but she’s like “no, you have to call him and tell him yourself”. *sigh* Mom, he really doesn’t like talking to me, I always feel like he’s tapping his foot waiting for me to shut up and let him hang up. We don’t get along, we were never close, even as children. Luis (Lou) really doesn’t ‘fit’ with the rest of the family. He’s the spitting image of my dad, dark and handsome, tall. But he’s intensely private and aloof. We’re loud(ish) and very into each other. I really don’t think he’d feel all that bad if we had all died in that car accident a few years ago. I just can’t forgive him for telling me I was a disappointment to him, several years ago at Thanksgiving, when I finally called him on his attitude towards me. I’m his older sister, but in many ways I feel like an only child So anyways, I’m going to call him tonight (*gag*), and feel awfully awkward as he wonders why I’m bothering to call him, answering my how are you questions with 1-5 word answers. I’ll give him my user name for Amazon.com and direct him to my wish list. I want to know if he and his ‘fiancé’ (no plans on marriage, just a ring, personally I think it was to shut her up) have one. It would make sending him gifts for holidays a lot easier. Sad, but sometimes I wish he’d just fade out of existence and our memories of him were erased. I haven’t had good memories of him since I was a little girl, just two decades of discomfort, short sharp pains, and absolute disconnection. Ick! Let’s not dwell there. I was writing Friday night! Just a few paragraphs on some thoughts I was having, but I was writing. We're still working on getting my digital camera to us, we've been trying since Wednesday night! Both Albany and Kingston stores were sold out, and the website wasn't working, and blah blah blah. However, Steve called the Albany store again today and he's going to be coordinating with them to get one that's coming in on a truck either tonight or tomorrow so by Friday, no later, I should have it :) What a great birthday present, and I told him that it could count as our one year anniversary also, since that's the weekend after my birthday. He was relieved, it's a big present. *grin* I have an idea of what I'd like to get him, and I think he's really going to like it. 4 comments|post comment

Fuckin' NASTY [07 May 2004|02:44pm] [ mood | dirty ] [ music | "Uninvited" - Alanis Morisette ] Oh how absolutely creeepy! I was going through those old suitcases full of old lady craft crap and I stuck my hand into a bag and you'll never guess what I pulled out! A "stole" of full body, sad, deflated - claws and faces still on - ferret or mink, or some other kind of muscalid fur stole! *SHUDDER* I couldn't get it back in the plastic bag fast enough! My stomach's churning... how absolutely creepy and nasty! The little face I saw had only one 'eyeball' and they were linked two by two, about six or eight all total. How fucking nasty! I've never been face to face (literally) with a fur product like that before. Fur collars, coats, whatever yeah... but ick. If you're not going to eat it (like cows or pigs and leather) don't kill it! When you're willing to eat the hundreds of little critters that go into a mink coat then you can wear the coat. Otherwise it's shameless and nasty. Fur, just for the sake of fur, is one of my pet peaves. 2 comments|post comment

"I'm Not Dead Yet! Really, I'm feeling Better!" (think Holy Grail scene) [07 May 2004|01:17pm] [ mood | chipper ] [ music | "Hem Of Your Garment" - Cake ] I feel MUCH better today! Steve and I had already planned and taken off yesterday and today and what better days to have off? It's sunny, breezy, beautiful and absolutely perfect. I'm sorry that I haven't posted in a long time, just been dead dog sick. I actually called in on Tuesday, something I almost never do because of my job's draconian attendance policy (I get only four sick days a year). I went to the doctor and he said I had bronchitis (duh). But I've been feeling better since Wednesday night and I'm doing okay :) Yesterday Steve and I unpacked some stuff, though he was much more ambitious than I, and we went food shopping. Money's been extra tight because of the move (and the rent for May, and the car, and the furniture, and stuff for the apartment, and paying for moving help= $3,500) so we couldn't afford to go grocery shopping until he got paid yesterday. Ouch. We took a drive up to Albany to drop off some last minute special order Mother's Day Avon for a new customer at Steve's job, and then we were off to Best Buy to get my birthday present. Unfortunately, they didn't have it in stock. So after Steve gets done helping out at his Dad's house he's going to run down to Kingston where they DO have it *grrr* and pick it up. Thankfully he's got a really good deal with their card, 90 days same as cash, so he can afford to get me the present he wanted to get even though we're technically broke. By the time the bill comes in we'll be good to go again and then we'll just pay it off in full as we normally would. I have to go through some suitcases of hand me down fabric I was given yesterday and then I'll be settling in to do a mad rush to finish mom's Mother's Day x-stitch project. I haven't had much time or good health to be working on it this month so I've got a shitload of work to do. Ack! I'm going to watch Mambo Italiano too! I'm lovin' this free Netflix trial (we'll continue the service when it expires). Oooh my little plants are growing up so well, especially the Nasturtium and Sweet Peas which have been transplanted into real pots now that they're big enough. Hey I lost 2.2 lbs last week! 20.4 lost total :) 1 comment|post comment

Throat of Fire [30 Apr 2004|11:21am] [ mood | sick ] [ music | "Rah" - Natacha Atlas ] Woohoo! It’s gorgeous out, I’m wearing new sexy strappy platform sandals and a really cute denim mini-skort to celebrate. Whee! :) I love it when the weather is comfortable with zero humidity and a bright balmy day. Unfortunately I’m feeling Steve’s cold now (thanks hon). Better now than later though, since the end of the month will be full of Saturday parties. Then again, I’m sick just in time for Beltaine, and it’s a special two-coven public outdoors event with a maypole and fire pit. *pout* I’ll be sure to medicate heavily and ask if they mind me coming even if I’m sick. Tonight should be our last night moving leftovers and stuff out of the old apartments. We had three great kids helping us out last night for two hours ($20 per person) and then it was pizza before taking them home. When I say kids, I mean as in 14, 16, and 20. *lol* Course Adam, 20, isn’t that much younger than I, but damn I felt old next to the other two. These are all kids from the comic book/card shop that Steve plays at on Sundays. They were very polite, and sweet kids, I wouldn’t mind having them around again. ‘Course now I’m sick, so I won’t be at my peak, but I’m never at my peak when I have to exert myself. The kids are coming back today, thank god! When we’re done, since it’s not a school night, they’re going to be rewarded with Kill Bill. There’s something not quite right about that, since two of them aren’t even old enough to legally watch it by themselves. *LOL* 1 comment|post comment

Woohoo! [28 Apr 2004|12:46pm] [ mood | excited ] [ music | "Ave Maria" - Charlotte Church ] What a tease… the sun is out and it’s brilliantly beautiful outside, but cold. Nyah. That’s just not right! It’s not that cold, but still. Last night was our Albany Witches MeetUp, Steve was sick still so he stayed home. The venue owner’s giving us shit about us not “reserving” the room (we go there every month for a year and a half now!) and we had a situation where we all almost had to leave. In the interests of not having to put up with their crap, and in promoting the pagan community in Albany, we’re going to do the next one at the Trinity Temple. One of the movers and shakers in our local community and his wife have leased a building that’s being used weekly for pagan events, it’s shaping up to be quite the community center. That’s a wonderful undertaking and I see no reason why our MeetUp can’t move there. When I got home last night (with a wicked headache) around 10:15 or so, Steve sat down next to me and said “We’ve got to talk about your birthday present.” Here I thought, oh well, he’s probably going to tell me that since we have to be careful because of the move that I can’t have a present. Which would have been fine with me. I consider this beautiful apartment to be such a gift (even though we both worked hard to get it). So he tells me, “I want to get you that digital camera you keep having to put off getting, but I wanted to make sure you were okay with that because I could also put that money towards the ring instead, but I know how much you want that camera.” Hee hee. Needless to say I was thrilled. I’ve wanted a digital camera for years, and especially since his ex roommate got one and I saw how gorgeous the shots can come out. Every time I get ready to get one though , something comes up and I have to spend the money on something more important. I told him that while, yes, I want the ring, I know that it’s coming some time this summer and that it’s all right with me if it takes a little longer. His other reasoning was that he knew that all my online friends would want to see it (the ring) when I got it, and if I already have the camera I can make sure that it’s online about .5 seconds after I get it. So I’m getting a digital camera in the next couple of weeks! Yay! (a Kodak Easyshare, just like the one that the roomie uses, what a great camera!) 3 comments|post comment

Relaxing... and a new car! [27 Apr 2004|01:01pm] [ mood | content ] [ music | "Them Bones" - Alice in Chains ] The move is 95% done now, Steve and I have the day off to recover and put my 'new' car on the road ('91 Honda). He's about to head out the door right now and go to the DMV for the plates and registration. Then it's off to my parents house to pick up the car where it's been in their private driveway since last night. The guy was nice enough to drive it to us. I got all my books unpacked and the kitchen is now completely done. The living room is shaping up, and it's just the dining room where all his comic book boxes and CCG boxes are that needs to get picked up. There's lot of carboard to dispose of. The apartment here is shaping up nicely. Over there at the other two (two houses down) there's a good two hours per apartment to go and then the damned thing's done. Woohoo! Honey's sick now though from all the work he's done. He can get a little grumpy when he's ill. The day is beautiful and my little plants are now sunning themselves on the little bay area outside our LR windows. 5 comments|post comment

In & Out [26 Apr 2004|09:16am] [ mood | exhausted ] [ music | "Frozen" - Madonna ] Ahhh, so today is Monday, the first full week in our new apartment has started. It really doesn’t feel real yet, and I think a large part of that has to do with our ‘new’ furniture. I think I mentioned this phenomenon already, so pardon please if I’m repeating myself. This weekend has been a lesson in exhaustion. Steve hurt his knee and leg from carrying so much stuff. I feel so bad for him, I know that I should have been more help, if I wasn’t such a wimp. By Sunday he was pretty much done in. Believe it or not, after all the work he did on Saturday, Jason (the only person to show up till Sunday) and his wife both came over on Sunday to help us as well. Jen was a darling and helped me clean some in Steve’s apartment, and she made many trips up and down two flights of stairs to put boxes down on the porch to move. Back in the new apartment she and I got the kitchen completely set up. I think there’s one little box left that has my bread machine and the steak knife set in it. We’ve got a ton of cleaning and throwing out of old junk in the old apartment, but thankfully we have through Friday night to finish it all up. Not that I want it to take that long! We have tomorrow off to go put my ‘new’ car on the road (WOOHOO!), so we’ll take the rest of the old furniture to the dump along with whatever else gets bagged up so we can do the final sweep, mop, and wipe-downs. We thought we were going to keep the end tables and lamps along with the coffee table, but it turns out that with the way we have to set the furniture up in the new place that we really don’t have the room for them. Damn not having wall space! So insteand we’ll keep the coffee table only, and then replace it (it’s awfully wobbly and old). Everything else is getting dumped! I love that feeling. Out with the old, in with the new. We have to remember the NO! Spray, the the cats (mostly my cat) are already going after the new furniture. We had to cover it with fabric so they wouldn’t claw it. My cat hates it when I do that, so it’ll be fine while we’re at work. She either minds the spray, or the bitch is getting declawed. I’ve been kind so far, but she won’t use a scratching post or pad, and I’m NOT going to have rescued her from the shelter so she can destroy TWO sets of furniture. Nuh uh. The place is already coming together, tons of boxes notwithstanding. I can’t wait to borrow a digital camera so you can all see it. :) post comment

Tadaa! We're IN :) [24 Apr 2004|03:38pm] [ mood | cheerful ] [ music | Birds chirping outside ] I hurt. I hurt everywhere I can possibly hurt, except in places that I'm too tired to have fun and make hurt. Wow. What an awful lot of moving we've done tonight. And remember tomorrow is the really heavy furniture. Actually, aside from odds and ends and cooking, tomorrow will have very little to do with me. Thank GOD. Lol I'm so fuckin' tired! The sad part is that Steve moved many times more stuff than I did. I'm such a weakling! I'd have to rest, panting on the chair here in the new apartment, exhausted. And I know he's so tired too, so I felt bad for feeling bad, you know? But here I am, typing this and saving it to post sometime tomorrow after the techie comes and reconnects our cable modem. I can't wait to post this so you guys know that we're in! Everything's moved (by ourselves) except the bed, futon frame, and the dressers. The 'new' furniture is coming by the grace of Jason tomorrow morning (today by the time you read this).Then it's off to the dump with the rest of mine. I won't be sorry to see it gone. I'm grateful to have had it, but it was my parent's furniture for 25 years before it was mine. The cats are here with us tonight too, and they're adapting pretty well. We've had them spend time in either apartment together before, so this is not the first time that they've seen each other. I shudder to think if it was. Steve's cat, Beth, is very skittish and rather odd. She looks like she got hit in the head with a 2X4. She was a street cat once upon a time, and has that lean, skin and bones body that someone who's starved for quite a long time sometimes never loses. Momma (my cat Suna aka Anach'sunamun) on the other hand is huge, black, and bossy. She really likes to have her own way. Kinda like her momma. Grin I got her from the shelter. Boy did she ever snowball me! I love it, I set up the bathroom with a little help from Steve. We HAD to take showers. Steve was fit to knock out a cow, and I was only a little better. But now our huge bathroom closet is stocked with our meager supply of really nice coordinating beige towels (2) that match our absolutely gorgeous burgundy and beige vined really nice towels (2 bath size, 2 hand towels). Oh and some cheap washcloths. The cupboard is bare(ish) as they say. Lol OOHHHH! And I walked in this afternoon and I had little shoots coming up on five of my pots! The Nasturtium and the Scarlet Flax Linum are sprouting :) Oh oh oh! And I forgot to tell you that Steve surprised me, to commemorate our first night in the new apartment, by bringing to work when he picked me up a HUGE arrangement of stunning flowers for our fireplace mantle! He picked them out all by himself, and they're all different shades of pink. There's snapdragons, two huge ivory daisies, tulips, what look like violently hot pink bluebells, and these mauve lily looking stems. I had to run them around the office and show the women that I've finally gotten flowers delivered to work! Grin I'm just tickled pink. I'll have to see if someone can bring a digital camera over before they go bad so I can post a picture. This is his first time buying me flowers, and man did he do it right. :) Anyway, that's enough, I'm exhausted and it's time to settle down for bed. I hope you all have a wonderful weekend, and I can't wait till saturday when I can post this. Thank you for all your encouragement, support, and kind words. I love you! 2 comments|post comment

Tick Tock [23 Apr 2004|06:35am] [ mood | excited ] [ music | "She Talks To Angels" - Black Crows ] Ahhh... today is the day, and last night was the night. Today is the day we leave work early and start to seriously finish the last of our gathering, bagging (for the dump), and packing. I finished the bathroom and sorting the clothes therein last night. I almost don't know what to do with myself there's so much to do! I know I have to break it down to rooms. Today is the kitchen, and then when I'm done with that it's on to the surfaces in the living room so the furniture itself can get moved or taken to the dump tomorrow. Then the surfaces in the connecting room to the bedroom since the actual stuff has already been bagged or moved. Then the bedroom which in its tinyness won't take long at all. Steve let slip about a certain surprise, which was something he hadn't done before. Turns out he's arranged it so that when he comes to get me at work today he'll be also coming in with an arrangement of flowers for me! *lol* I can't wait to see them. He picked something that will go well on top of the new marble fireplace mantle, and it's not a cheap one either. Whee! What a wonderful man. I couldn't ask for better. :) Tomorrow's our big move the furniture and everything left day. That's why I have to get so much done in here today. But that means that by Sunday, all I'll have to do is come in here and get the odds and ends (baggable stuff) and finish cleaning which will be mostly sweeping and mopping and wiping down surfaces. OH wow. This is becoming so really real! This is one of my most favorite songs ever: Round Here Counting Crows Step out the front door like a ghost into the fog Where no one notices the contrast of white on white And in between the moon and you the angels get a better view Of the crumbling difference between wrong and right I walk in the air between the rain through myself and back again Where? I don’t know Maria says she’s dying through the door I hear her crying Why? I don’t know Round here we always stand up straight Round here something radiates Maria came from nashville with a suitcase in her hand She said she’d like to meet a boy who looks like elvis She walks along the edge of where the ocean meets the land Just like she’s walking on a wire in the circus She parks her car outside of my house Takes her clothes off Says she’s close to understanding jesus She knows she’s more than just a little misunderstood She has trouble acting normal when she’s nervous Round here we’re carving out our names Round here we all look the same Round here we talk just like lions But we sacrifice like lambs Round here she’s slipping through my hands Sleeping children better run like the wind Out of the lightning dream Mama’s little baby better get herself in Out of the lightning She says it’s only in my head She says shhh I know it’s only in my head But the girl on car in the parking lot says ’man you should try to take a shot Can’t you see my walls are crumbling? ’ Then she looks up at the building and says she’s thinking of jumping She says she’s tired of life she must be tired of something Round here she’s always on my mind Round here hey man got lots of time Round here we’re never sent to bed early And nobody makes us wait Round here we stay up very, very, very, very late I can’t see nothing, nothing round here Catch me if I’m falling 2 comments|post comment

Quite Accomplished :) [21 Apr 2004|09:35am] [ mood | busy ] [ music | "Criminal" - Fiona Apple ] I am proud of me :) Last night I did in fact get rid of fully ONE HALF of my shoes! I went from about 50lbs of shoes down to 25lbs. Why do I say it in weight instead of pairs of shoes? Because they get carried in these HUGE red white and blue bags with handles that my parents gave me. I have three of them. When I first moved into this apartment I had gone from fully 3 bags down to two, now I’m down to one. Damn I’m proud of me. *grin* I also went through my entire craft corner in my ‘extra room’ that connects to my bedroom. I condensed my fabric and loose crafts down, and wouldn’t you know I filled up two garbage bags with junk to throw out. Once again… you guessed it. Tonight I’m all set to work on my bathroom. It REALLY needs it. Yes. I’m a slob. But I’m telling you as Gods are my witnesses that I WILL NOT let the new apartment go. I’m already on that path. This apartment has been much better kept than my last which was a literal den of despair and showed it. As my mood and happiness increases, or realisticly is staying at maintainable level, I believe that I’ll be even more willing to have my surroundings reflect that happiness. That and I’ll have another person in the house to keep up with the work along with me. I stepped out on the back deck and I was thrilled to see that my tree has green flowers on it. How strange! There was a huge fat bumblebee buzzing around, flitting from cluster to cluster and having his way with the blooms. I’m going to miss being able to reach out into the canopy of that huge tree, one of the few benefits of living on the third floor. There’s something wonderful about that high and sweeping view. I can see above most of the buildings and the azure mountains slightly hazy in the distance. I look down from my lofty perch and watch the robins hopping through the underbrush and looking for worms. I can see the local murder of crows congregating and then being chased by others who don’t like their sort. Some how I can’t believe that by Sunday, we’ll be completely moved into our new apartment. How the road rises up to meet me :) 1 comment|post comment

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