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I've dated so many Gemini's, its not even funny. But its not like I ask them before the attraction begins what their sign is, its just uncanny. Anyways, our romance ignited like an exploding star. In those days, I had a reputation for being with lots of girls that was frankly, untrue. So one night, we talked about it, and I guess I was able to calm her doubts about me, because the next day, boom, it was on like a wildfire! She was intelligent, and very attractive, with these dark smoldering eyes that feigned a calm countenance...they were like big, black chains holding down a ferocious tiger just waiting in the shadows. She became the unwitting priest in my exorcism...the exorcism of demons that haunted me...I guess you could say family issues that I had dealt with pretty much on my own until then. One thing I remember really made an impression on me, was the boundaries she set with me. Up until that time, I was such a handsome, seemingly innocent boy, and the opposite sex took great pleasure in devouring me and feeling as though they had shown me something I'd never get over. In fact, I've always been a very sexual person, and I was never really swept off my feet persay. But she was so clear about where I could and couldn't go, and not in a prissy or restrictive way, more like...hmm...she knew herself, and could be honest about things that other people would shy away from...and that to me was a surprise, and really drew me to her. It was an air of confidence I guess, that I didn't have. It was like an deer telling a leopard, "you may be able to have me for your dinner, but not until you've chased me down, and even then, I may change my mind after all." I don't really know what I'm saying...it was just so different. In those days, I really hated myself, and manifested it by destroying everything dear to me, and that meant that I had to ruin it or risk being happy. I found some totally lame-ass non-reason to be angry with her, and moved on. I'll quote Morrissey on this one, because for some reason I'm at a loss for words..."...born old sadly wise. Resigned, well we were, to ending our lives, I'm so glad to grow older....to move away from those younger years. I'm in love for the first time, and I don't feel bad." We all have to learn to love ourselves. For some, like her, it came naturally and it shone through. For others, like me, its a never-ending process (and by the way, today I'm doing great ::bows...waits for applause::), but its something that has to be achieved or life will never be understood the way its meant to be. I was lucky to get the chance to ask her forgiveness some years later, and of course, being as kind and bright as she was, she gave it to me. She has since become even more stirringly beautiful...I remember how intensly she'd devour me with her kisses. It was not uncommon for me to taste my own blood...
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