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[12 Jun 2003|09:23pm] |
"Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all of its pupils." I stared at this quote, drawing my knees to my chest as a flood of memories nearly drowned me in sorrow. Silently, I closed the book that the quote was in, and a series of questions began to fill my sub-concious. I had a best friend. Notice the past tense. He was everything; my friend, my best friend, my soul mate, my first love, everything. Time couldn't teach him everything because time killed him.
His name was Brandon. When I was two years old, one of my grandmother's friends threw a birthday party. Brandon's family was invited. I was introduced to him, and both of our parents managed to get us to kiss somehow. I even have the picture to prove it.
Brandon and I met again in Brantford, my hometown, at tennis camp. I was about six years old. We didn't get along at first, simply because of our contrasting personalities. I was the outgoing, outspken, athletic one; while he was the self-involved, shy one. Nonetheless, my boldness got to the best of me and I simply walked to him, glasses and all, and said "you're cute, you want to be my tennis partner?" This is where the legend began. We spent the whole summer together in his pool house, swimming and making masterful Lego building of castles. He was my true Prince Charming. We both had our love for reading and would sometimes just spend the day reading till sundown and fall asleep in each other's arms.
When school began, and disintegrated the magic of summer, Brandon discovered girls had cooties and refused to associate his cleanliness with my filth. However, two years later my mother became frustrated with my boredom and made me call him. That was the summer we becamse best friends. It was a summer full of magic, and mosquito bites. Lots of 'em, too. We learned how to play baseball, and discovered a new hideout to practice this new-found talent down at the school. We spent days in that hideout playing the weird things kids did. We grew up together. I met his friends, and they became my friends. It was like we were half of the same person. Then came one of the most important moments of my life. It was extremely touching to me as an eleven year old. It was nightime, and we were wrapped under a blanket of stars. We were at our hangout, on top of the slides, sitting side by side. After five minutes of breathing in the cool night, he took my hand. For five more minutes, I had the most ridiculous grin on my face. He made me so happy. Finally he turned to me, and our eyes met. It felt like fire. He simply said, "Kira, I love you" Without hesistation I told him I loved him right back. We both smiled and laughed nervously. But it felt so right. Brandon was always, always there for me. His shoulder was always there for me to cry on, and his ears were always ready to listen to my long traumas of teenagehood. He was an amazing friend.
When I turned 12, and his hormones were raging, we had our first kiss. Short and sweet. That's all I remember. He was my first kiss, and my first true love. We shared so many inside jokes; it would take a whole book to fill up.
In the beginning of ninth grade, it was discovered he had cancer. I never wanted to know what kind, because it didn't matter. All I knew was my best friend was dying. Iwent through grade nine, thinking about him every second of every day. He wouldn't let me visit him in the hospital. It was too painful for him to see me. I called every day, and he wrote me letters but that was it. He would talk occasionally to our mutual friend Darryn. Darryn would tell me his tumor was sucking the life out of him. Stuff he said didn't make sense. In the spring of 2001, march 31st, I got a phone call at 5 o'clock in the morning from his mother saying he had died. He died in his sleep. She told me, before his mind started to lose it that he would talk about me every day, and told her to tell he me he would always love me. His last words were "make sure you tell kira i love her"
Time didn't teach him everything. He won't know what being a teenager is all about, won't know the frustrations of high school, the excitement of university, won't ever know the euphoria of getting laid, won't be able to do all the things we have gotten to do. Time didn't allow him that. But time did allow him to be in my life, and time did allow me to experience what I didn't know was possible. Love. True love.
I love you too, Brandon.
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lonely
hopeful
sad
scared
chipper