Below are the 8 most recent journal entries recorded in scott's Blurty:

Wednesday, March 31st, 2004
7:13 pm	LESBIMAN Lesbiman: the only man able to attract femals of lesbian and straight sort. a man so devilishly handsom and amazingly hot no female can resist him. he makes himself known with a common maiting call of OUWAH. amazingly hot femals imediatly come to him after he has made the maiting call and they continue to encircle him untill he has found a acceptable one and has chosen her for his partner. this female chosen from the others, will be seen as there supirior. the secret to lesbimans magical attraction powers will never be revealed and the mystery of why women long for him as he passes and why they jump and kill just to be near him is also uncertain but we do know that lesbiman is real and that his powers are still used to this day on women all over the world. Current Mood: im at dave's house Current Music: rumble rumble.. oh wait thats the computer (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, February 2nd, 2004
9:52 pm	Bordom Kills LITERALY Have you ever thought of where crazy people come up with their plans to destroy mankind and take over the world well this comes from being SO bored they just thought it up to kill time. You know when your sitting there and you've got nothing to do so you just start thinking things up to do but are too lazy to do them well the people that arn't too lazy to do them are called phycopaths or NASA but mostly phycopaths the rest are just people with way too much free time so they try to go to the moon. anyways osama bin ladin yup a lot of money and a lot of free time, just imagin how bored you have to be to come up with the idea to crash plains into giant buildings. i see his thought prosses now... While throwing his own crap at peasents and knocking over a large one osama comes up with the idea to hit big thing with flying thing then his assistant comes in and says airplan and building? and with his hatred of the states had formed a terrorist act. so by reducing free time by allowing porno to be freely downloaded to any computer at any time we can reduce the amount of terrorist acts and the number of murders and violence in general. So all you people out there make PORN free or face the rath of crazy people with too much free time, any donations are kindly apreciated. FREE PORN = SAFER SCHOOLS!!! Current Mood: creative Current Music: my computer fan (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, January 28th, 2004
10:02 pm	God? friend or foe (personal opinion only) God, symbol of things that are good and something that we should all strive for is heaven, personaly i belive this is false hope. this thing that we call heaven is like somone acctauly winning the lottery and getting all the money that is advertised. everyone claims its there and you do all you can to try and get it, you buy all the tickets you can once a week and yet you still either dont win or dont get all the money it said u did. heaven is someone no one has proven, something so farfeched that only the narror minded and gulable belive in. something made up to try and perfect the earths population with things like the bible that tell us to be good and not do certain things because its against god's teaching. i personaly dont belive in any religion or in god at all. i belive in science and knowledge which has proof instead of theorys and books written with no real proof. the bible, ancient book written many years ago with information in it about how we should all live and what we need to do to become acceptable in the eyes of god. i think this is wrong. this is someone telling us how we should act and how we should live our lives, this is the same thing we try and prevent now with the new laws and such. i belive that the bible was created a long time ago to stop all the problems we had in life and to give people something to think of and follow to guide them. this was created and then suddenly put into the world exclaiming it was from god and now were all sucked into the world of following something someone else wrote, we are being controlled like pupets in the hands of god, except that there is no god there is no greater good there is nothing but what we make. life is about living the lives we are givin and there is nothing that happens for a reason and there is no miracles. if u happen to get fired one day and happen to have commited a sin the day before are in no way related but u probably got fired because u were slacking off on your work hours. anyways my point is religion is a way of controlling us and that we shouldnt follow religion but just be good and generous people and we will not need to have the extremists that bomb people because there religion sais they should. Current Mood: tired Current Music: Nickelback-Someday (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, January 27th, 2004
4:38 pm	So so bored... bordom... what a strange thing no one can fix, cure or heal... this thing we call bordom infects most of us at one point in every day or week. this is the thing that no one likes, no matter how many things we have that we could do we still resort to sitting there staring at the wall bored shitless. at this very moment i am bored so i write this. nothing to do on the day before an english exam except write here and im writting nothingness. but yet you still read on no matter how much i write you will keep reading because if u dont youl be angry at yourself, and this text will haunt you forever, youl see it in your dreams... littlemage littlemage littlemage. u will go crazy untill u read this entire thing and if u stop now your just causeing yourself more and more pain and suffering. this may be entirely pointless but ur gona keep reading. so il stop. do not read this if u do not want to waste your time. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
10:59 am	MIGHTY JOE MIGHTY! episode ONE, the EXAMS This is the true story of how the EXAMS came to be, its a little diffrent then you might think. this story takes place in the anthenian times and well it takes place in athens. this story begins with a man named joe, now joe was a lumberjack and well he really loved what he did cutting down all the trees and he loved his shoes best of all. you see joe had the only pair of shoes in all of athens and everyone else had sandles. well one day someone new came to town and she looked a little diffrent then everyone else. she had this ring thing that was way too big for her finger and she was always yelling like shes some crazy monkey lover or something.... this scared joe, he acctualy thought she was a nut case but youl find out about that soon enough. so one day joe was cleaning his beautifull shoes and after he was done he decided to go out and take his axe to get it sharpend but he left his shoes behind because the store was so close. when he came back he saw the new girl who was there and she was admiring his shoes so he goes over and asks what her name is she replys with a couple of yells and then sais xena warrior pinfest, joe sais pinfest? she sais yah im a pinfest i got 3872 pins in my stomac from all the stuff i eat. joes extreamly surprised at this but thinks nothing more of it. so joe goes back to get his newly sharpend axe so he can cut down some big trees. except when he comes back he sees xena and one shoe.... he walks over thinking he just can't see the other one and looks around in a panic... then he looks a xena and his one remaing shoe and exclaims at the top of his voice: EH! XENA ATE MY SHOE!!!!!!!!!!! this upset him more then anything because they were his favorit thing. joe was so angry he grabed her put her in cage and thought of a punishment worthy of his lost shoe.... he decides somehting that will certainly revenge his shoe, he decides to put her in a room with live animals and a stick and to try and come out alive, so he took one of the largest houses and cut the roof off, he then invited all the town to come and watch him avenge his shoe. he then got the biggest lion he could find and didnt feed him for a week, the lion going mad with starvation would have eaten anything (perfect for the situation) so joe then puts xena in the room and opens the door to let the lion out, xena started her little war cry and just as she had begun the second set of screams the lion jumps up and bites her head off. then starts devouring her guts and chewing on her bones. joe was so pleased at his punishment that he decided to create a number of difrent things and since they were so difficult and imposible he decided to keep them and he named them after that exclamation he had made when his beloved shoe had been eaten. Eh! Xena Ate My Shoe or EXAMS. joes methods would be continued for centurys, the room with the lion was created into the coloseum and then the EXAMS were never quite removed and we still die over them to this day... till next time MIGHTY JOE MIGHTY Current Mood: blank Current Music: I get knocked down! - SmashMouth (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, January 25th, 2004
8:30 pm	This one time at hockey camp Ah good old hockey camp, nothing like it nothing better. anyways a bunch of us whent to hockey camp and oh the storys we have from there. we get to camp and we all settle in our cabin and put all our stuff on the beds and get setled in as we do every year except this year was diffrent somehting so diabolicaly evil and devious was happening right under our nose and no one knew about it until it was too late. this my friends is the story of the EYE POKER. now as we were in camp we did the normal things you do at camp play dodge ball till the councelor breaks someones nose and then have 5 min time out then go again. we played some hockey there and we whent swimming and stuff like that. but what we didnt know was the whole time there was something out there, something watching us, watching everything we were doing, planing its evil plans and thinking up its evil scemes. this was the meanis we were unaware of, this my friends was the EYE POKER. it was about the third day at camp and we just came back from hockey and we showerd and got ready for bed, this was the night none of us would ever forget, this night still scares little children who were told the tale and still haunts us that were there to the day we die... this was the night of the EYE POKER. we had taken our beds to what we wanted, myself, james and david were on top bunks wile the others rested on the bottom. by one of the top bunk beds there was a windo... a window that would never be forgoten never be anything less then the horrible fate that was bestowed upon it. this was the window from which the EYE POKER had enterd... this my friends is when we were all going to sleep. we got into our sleeping bags, closed our eyes and waited for the rising sun and the next day. this was the night that the worst happend. the thing that had been watching us was moving closer and closer to our cabin it had its evil plans and its little hands of trouble... something so evil no one would ever even expect it to do anything near us let alone the act that it was about to compleat... as it aproched the window we lay there sleeping unexpecting what was about to happen to our limp bodys. it opend the windows waking one of us on the top bunk, and did something so devious and disturbing it is hard to even speak it. it crawled to where jamie lay, it awoke him suddenly he stoped staring at it and it staring back. suddenly it moves closer to jaime, closer and closer, jamie starts backing up but hes cornerd. then it did somehting so horrendus and terrible that little children fear it to the day, it it..... POKED JAMIE IN THE EYE! and from that day on we've made fun of him about his little raccon friend that poked him in the eye all those years ago. thank you and good night. Current Mood: cynical Current Music: Flavor of the Week, American Hi-Fi (1 Comment |Comment on this)
6:36 pm	readers caution!!! this is a caution to all those who would be reading any of my articles, they are of compleate and entire intrest of mine and contain everything i feel they need to, plz commnet on them as you please and make the comment nice and interesting none of that wow thats good bull. i write these with my limited spare time and if u want to read them in your spare time feel free, these can make u laugh cry, or inexplisitly implode at any moment so be cautioned of these mysterious things that have happend. some cases involve weting one self with urine, extreme gas problems, a suden laughter that coughs out deadly fire eating ants that craw up your shirt, down your pants and every where else you can think of and then start eating at your flesh, or they might give u a 20, either way beware the evil ass eating ants from HELL. (they dont realy exist our producers made them up cause one had realy bad dieria once and the crap looked like ants and he had so much the toilet overflowed and he got scared and thought they were ants from hell, we just gave him some flowers and sent him home telling him they were anti-hell ant flowers that would protect him from them, then he saw an acctual ant on the ground and started running down the street into trafic until he hit the rail and fell over the hill into a pile of cow dung and then he started running from the "kill flys of shit from hell." and thats when he said the kill alien children from URANUS were watching him from there evil dens inside the tires of cars that were passing by, and then he got hit by a car and the old lady driving got out and started pokeing him with her cane, meanwile were all standing in the door way watching this. anyways, he then got up and started running around in circles claiming that some thing was in his nose and he couldnt get it out so he started slaping himself and we thought that was pretty funny. anywho then the police came and he said they were the men in pink MIP so we just ignored that part cause they were not wearing pink. then we all whent inside and started working again when we saw him running outside naked coverd in peper spray until he ran into a fire hydrant and that wasn't pretty cause you see he was tall enought to get mostly over it but hes a guy u see and the top of the hydrant was just high enough to get him right there and yah.... so anyways he was nuts whent to a insanesylum and yah hes gone now. so thats why we have the fire ants for his memory. anyways back to the caution, yah some of these entrys may have no point at all and may just be me being realy realy realy bored and having nothing better to do so i write these and well yah this is just a warning that some of these may go on and on and on and you just keep on reading them as long as i keep writting them. so if i write a million words on how to eat cow shit ur gona read all one million words. anyways back to the fire ants yah these are killer little things and well they enjoy eating other fire ants there for killing them selfs and causing you no worrys at all. and well this caution having no point enjoy the rest of what little free time you have left. Current Mood: I like pie Current Music: Does barney count? (1 Comment |Comment on this)
5:25 pm	the movie moron! Episode One Hello, my name is marven maroon and i love those real life tv shows that they play in those big buildings with those HUGE tvs. wow i love going there even thought it costs me money to watch tv its worth it these are the newest tv shows and then they bring them out later on normal tvs and thats just reruns. anyways i wanted to see this one new reality tv show called win a date with tad hamilton... i mean OMG the girl in the show looks like a perfect mach for him, (i realy hope she wins.) who knew that guy from that 70's show would be on reality tv its amazing what they do now a days for entertainment. i mean come on reality tv shows are getting more and more extream. like that one with the ring and the elfs, i mean WOW where did they get all the midgets with big feet and those pointy eared people there must be a lot more freaks in this world then i knew. i mean realy ppl who would go fighting for some little gold ring... oooohhh ahhhhh its so pretty and then theres that realy ugly kid with no hair and bad dental higene he needs braces big time! and then theres that guy with the axe the short one with the beard i mean UGLY if someone ever whent on a date with that guy bring some major scisors and plz cut that off. of and the guy who gets the ring throws it in lava i mean what a stupid thing they do all this stuff and all these ppl die and he just throws it away, i would have sold it to the money man oliver the guy with the jewelry store. but you cant control these ppl i guesse reality tv has a harsh effect on you. well im gona go to the tv building il see you ppl later. tv man out. Current Mood: i dont know what that means Current Music: SHUT UP SHUT UP just shut up thats a great song. (3 Comments |Comment on this)