white it out like glittering wax butterflies   
03:13pm 05/05/2003
mood: excited
music: The Used
Again, several days between posts. I'm sure that it'll be like this for awhile, until I get back to Ramapo, get bored daily, and post every day, maybe numerous times. But we'll see. My schedule for next year kinda sucks. And I'm still scared to tell Bill about going back, because I know he's going to get upset. And it'll probably translate into Bill getting angry, and I don't wanna hear him yelling at me. And so I put it off. And put it off and put it off and put it off.

Jen knows, however. And she cried, but now she's okay I think. She came with me today in Wilson hall to drop the classes I'm registered for and withdraw from the school, and pay for and set up the transferring of this semester's transcript once it's all over. I, however, am done with Monmouth. I'm not going back, not even tomorrow.

Here, by the way, is my schedule for next semester:

8:30 - 9:45 American Government
10:00 - 11:15 Modern Comparative Politics

8:30 - 9:45 Math Reasoning with Elementary Functions (ugh)
2:00 - 3:15 Politics in Developing Nations
6:30 - 9:00 Social Psychology

10:45 - 1:15 International Politics

8:30 - 9:45 American Government
10:00 - 11:15 Modern Comparative Politics

8:30 - 9:45 Math Reasoning with Elementary Functions (ugh)
2:00 - 3:15 Politics in Developing Nations

Vicki says if I'm gonna be up for 8:30's anyway, I should do the morning show, since Louis is threatening to give it up anyway. If he does, maybe I will. I don't know. It's tough to say, because I also want to work at least fifteen to twenty hours a week at the Home Depot on 17 up there, and I want to be in Community Builders Coalition and Model UN. I'm thinking maybe I can work six hour shifts on Monday (1-7), Wednesday (3 - 9), and Thursday (1 - 7), and that'll be eighteen hours a week. And that'll work out well for me -- it's enough money to live, but I'm not killing myself. And I can up the hours when I'm in a winter or summer class, so that I can make more money and store it up.

Overall, I'm thrilled that I'm done with Monmouth now, and that I'll be at Ramapo again in the fall. From what I can tell, the people here will miss me and the people there are happy I'm coming back (yay!). So that's good. And even though I'm in random housing again, now I know people there, and I know the school, and it's not unfamiliar and scary and strange and weird and it's not this looming thing.

There are things I have to be careful about there, though. I have to watch what I eat and I have to make sure I get enough exercise. I have to make sure that I don't procrastinate so much that no work gets done. I have to make sure I call and talk to my mother enough. I have to make sure I come visit or arrange for people to come and visit me.

But I know I can do all that. And I'm excited!

Tomorrow, I'm going to the gym with Jen at 10. Then I'm going to get an ID picture (maybe) and I'm going to talk to someone in Res Life (definitely). And I'm going to try to hang out with Chris and Vicki and Louis and Cara and Susie and everybody up there (hopefully). I don't know exactly what's going on. But I'll figure it out.


Goals for summer break: to further my religious and spiritual studies, to get on track with drinking tons of water and no soda and eating healthfully and taking care of my body, and to prepare to go back to Ramapo. I need a collapsable chair and maybe a night table, a new phone, and maybe something for the shower. I'm going to try to figure out where I'm living first, and talk to my new roommate about what she wants to do for the shower situation.

Because I've withdrawn from everything at Monmouth, I'm not going to do the summer session. Instead, I'm going to get up daily, go to the gym, come home and do my studying. Then I'm going to go to work or whatever. I'm going to have to be careful about not drinking any soda, and I'm going to try to eat more salads and fruits and vegetables and healthy food, and watch out for junk and eating too many carbs. I'm also going to have to be careful to make sure I get to the gym every day.

Okay, I think I'm done now. I wrote a lot. Here's my list before I depart:

Five Things I'm Thankful For
1) I'm alive
2) Rawn
3) The opportunity to further my studies
4) The opportunity to kickstart my quest for good health
5) Escaping back to where I feel at home!