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new blurty [07 Jan 2004|12:00am] ...mmk, time for a new blurty. this name jus doesnt fit me anymore i guess? idk..im just tired of it. everything is still the same..so yeah. my new name is l_fallingstar_l...add me if u wanna and comment me ;] ily guys Mandy & Jeremy Always

>> Update [05 Jan 2004|10:46pm] [ mood | blah ] [ music | changes-3 doors down ] >> Update << |1| Okay so i havent been on in like..er 3-5 days..i lost count (shrugz)..i had to get away from some shit, and deal with it on my own, so if you was worried about me, im sorry. i didnt mean to worry anyone, i was just thinking of myself and what i needed for once...i love ya guys and im sorry <3 |2| I broke my leg ;] go Amanda. It hurts, but i will live. Pain Killers<333 Anyways, yeah..i dont wanna write the whole story because some people read this, and they have enough to deal with, without worrying about all this shit. just basically...Amanda+Father+Table+Isabel=Broken Leg. Yeah anyways... |3| Me and Jeremy have stuff worked out...i think? He is having alot of problems right now, but he believes me, and he trusts me..and he says he loves me and only wants to be with me..so yeah..i think that's all that needs to be said about it. That's what is important right? |4| Yeah, so alot of people who have said they dont want to talk to me anymore, have been wanting to talk to me again...I dunno cause some of them were like good friends, and i totally miss them..i just dont want the past to repeat itself. yeah know? i guess i have to take risks..i know things wont ever be the same as they were with these people, but i still miss alot of them, and im willing to try again..but...idk how its going to work. might as well go for it..all that can happen is them telling me they hate me again. i will live. Anyways, im going to go and talk to Jeremy now. I dont have anything else to right so yeah.... -Amanda- I'm not supposed to be scared of anything, But I don't know where I am I wish that I could move but I'm exhausted And nobody understands (how I feel) I'm tryin' hard to breathe now, But there's no air in my lungs. There's no one here to talk to And the pain inside is making me numb. I try to hold this under control, They can't help me, cause no one knows. Now I'm goin' through changes, changes. God, I feel so frustrated lately. When I get suffocated, save me. Now I'm goin' through changes, changes Feelin' weak and weary Walkin' through this world alone Everything they say every word of it Cuts me to the bone, (and I bleed) I've got something to say But now I've got nowhere to turn It feels like I've been buried Underneath all the weight of the world. I try to hold this under control, They can't help me, cause no one knows. Now I'm goin through changes, changes God, I feel so frustrated lately When I get suffocated, save me. Now I'm goin' through changes, changes I'm blind and shakin', bound and breakin' I hope I'll make it, through all these changes. Now I'm going through changes, changes God I feel so frustrated, lately When I get suffocated, save me. Now I'm falling apart, now I feel it. But I'm going through changes, changes. God I feel so frustrated, lately. And I get suffocated, I hate this. But I'm going through changes, changes. Mandy & Jeremy Always

[02 Jan 2004|12:13am] [ mood | rejected ] [ music | anthem of our dieing day-S.o.t.Y ] ..i dont know what to do, i dont know where to turn, i want to run away, but i cant. its still there, repeating in my mind..i swear to GOD if i get accused of cheating again after this, im going to kill myself, or someone. im tired of being accused of being dishonest, and cheating..and ugh....when it isnt even me. i need more alcohol. i want it to all fade into nonexistence..but it wont..no no..never that. how can he sit here and say he loves me..and then..let her....god...i have one question, buring through me.. WHY ....how?...he jus...told me he loved me..and then..this?!...I have been trampled over..i have been hurt..i have been betrayed..i have been cheated on...but this...this is Jeremy..he should have known what she would try...and he still let her...&@*#@&#*(&@*(#&@*(&#(*@&*(#&*@&@&#&@*(#&@*(#.....what the fuck am i supposed to do?!...am i not supposed to be mad?..am i not supposed to be upset?...i cant write right now. im going to call Isabel and make her come get me. Mandy & Jeremy Always

- private entry- [31 Dec 2003|02:54pm] ..mmk..the next entry is a private one, so sorry guys. this is just personal shit that has nothing to do with anyone. Mandy & Jeremy Always

[31 Dec 2003|04:17am] [ mood | sleepy ] [ music | DipShit-Rufio ] ..er..so yeah...im actually more okay right now than i have been in the past 4 days thanks to Matt. I have been sitting here worryin about my Dad and about Jeremy...and then Matt talked to me..and yeah, he made things better. he is an awesome guy, for real. he has always always been there to make me smile when i feel like shit, and that's part of the reason why i dont know what i would do without him. I have been sitting here, worrying about Jeremy..so many question's are running through my head, and im not sure what to think....is he okay? did they take him to the e.r.?! what is he thinking? is he even thinking about me? Where do we go from here? does he really believe her? i mean...come on..u know what..here..all my friends who read my blurty..yeah you guys all know how much i love Jeremy, and how much i despise cheaters...tell me if this sounds like a convo i had with Ms. reha...-smh- RiiNgxp0pxbiitch : hey DeIicate x Tears : hii RiiNgxp0pxbiitch : whats goin on DeIicate x Tears : nothing much how are things with u and Jer? RiiNgxp0pxbiitch : ok i guess, im back with jeremy DeIicate x Tears : ooo... cool, what happened to that other guy? RiiNgxp0pxbiitch : he was just someone DeIicate x Tears : so u used him... whie u were with jeremy? RiiNgxp0pxbiitch : basically, its not like hes going to find out DeIicate x Tears : thats wrong mandy, when u say u love jeremy RiiNgxp0pxbiitch : so everyone makes mistakes, i just took advantage of that DeIicate x Tears : why would u tho? jeremys a great guy RiiNgxp0pxbiitch : i agree i was just bored. ..yeah so...rofl does that sound like me?!..ummm NOO...look at my profile...look at my homepage..look at my blurty for god sakes!!! People and their drama drive me insane...|shakes head| anyways..yeah..its jus a lil obvious reha doesnt know me very well, cause she cant even make up a conversation correctly..rofl...anyways... yay im still talking to matt<3333333333 he is such a sweet guy. i guess him and brandy are back together..i wish them nothing but the best..and i hope she takes the time to realize how lucky she is. Matt is such a great guy and always wanting to make my problems go away...he is always wanting to be there to catch me when im falling down, i mean, what more can you ask for?..he has been there for 2 1/2 years....he is the only person who has stuck by me through everything, and never turned his back on me and ran away, no matter how many problems of his own he is dealing with, he was always there for me. i will have to write the total story on Matt later, but yeah. he never looks for what he wants, but he searchs for a way to make everyone else feel happy and content..gotta love him. not many people know him like i do, and i dont even know him..its crazy...idk...anyways..i think imma go to bed...im getting sleepy. Thanks Matt!! Ilysm (1) Mandy & Jeremy Always

MOTHER FUCKING PISSED [30 Dec 2003|10:20pm] [ mood | pissed off ] [ music | I FUCKING HATE YOU!!!! ] .. OH MY GOD!!! I DONT THINK I HAVE EVER EVER EVER!! BEEN SO MOTHERFUCKING PISSED IN MY ENTIRE SIXTEEN YEARS OF LIFE!!!!!! AHHHHH!!! WHY THE FUCK WOULD SHE LIE ABOUT ME LIKE THAT?! WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I EVER EVER EVER DONE TO HER? JUST BECAUSE SHE DOESNT WANT ME AND JEREMY TOGETHER, SHE GOES AND MAKES UP A FUCKING FAKE CONVERATION THAT NEVER EXISTED?!! ITS FUCKING COMMON KNOWLEDGE WITH EVERYONE THAT IM IN LOVE WITH JEREMY..PEOPLE HATE ME BECAUSE IM IN LOVE WITH JEREMY AND ITS GETTING FUCKING OLD THAT PEOPLE CANT FUCKING DEAL WITH IT!!! IM SICK OF PEOPLE TRYING TO BREAK US UP!!! MY FUCKING GOD!!!!!!!! Im going to have a nervous break down, i fucking know it. I feel so....fucking pissed!!! MY GOD!! Jeremy wont even talk to me now, cause she fucking lied. Why the hell would i say shit like that? why would she fucking send a fake ass conversation to him?! Was she so fucking stupid she didnt think he would email it to me and ask me what the fuck it was about? She wont even answer my IMs because she knows she is a fucking liar. C O M E O N N O W!!!!! Im going to get fucked up with Isabel and Jason. She had just shown up at my house when reha IMed me...she seen it all and she offered to get me pills..rofl..yeah pills..what i said i was going to stay away from and i dont give a fuck anymore. this is such bullshit. run away from it all huh? yeah thats what the old mandy would do, and i guess thats what the new fucking amanda is going to do too!!!! yeah...Im just going to go do that now. -smh-. thanx tommay for trying to be there for me, and telling me not to give up. im sorry if i dissapointing you right now, but i cant fucking deal with this on top of my dad.. oh yeah and reha.. YOU EVEN WORSE THEN FUCKING BREEZY!! AT LEAST SHE ONLY TRIED TO FUCK MY BOYFRIEND. SHE NEVER LIED ABOUT ME. I FUCKING HATE YOU MORE THAN I HAVE EVER EVER EVER HATED ANYONE IN MY LIFE!!! I HATE YOU AS MUCH AS I HATE MY DAD. YOU ARE BOTH THE WORST PEOPLE I KNOW. I HOPE YOU AND EVERY OTHER GUTTER-BITCH I HAVE EVER MET ARE FUCKING HAPPY NOW!! YOU HAVE TAKEN THE ONLY PERSON I WANT AND TURNED THEM AWAY FROM ME, PROBABLY FOR GOOD THIS TIME SO FUCK YOU ALL. CONGRADU FUCKING LATIONS!!!!! Mandy & Jeremy Always

..erm.. [30 Dec 2003|05:04pm] [ mood | blank ] ........uh..yeah so i have been gone for 3 days, and it feels like ALOT longer. i have missed Jeremy like none other. yeah so i guess i should update a lil.. Uh, i have been under "supervision" for 3 days, because my Dad is a psycho dick ;x. I had to work late and i didnt think to call and tell my parent's or anything cause, uh..yeah it was only like an hour late. But, i didnt call like a dumbass, and then when i got home, my dad started YELLING his head off at me. He started telling me what a slut i was and how i was whoring myself to anyone who would fuck me. At first, i just stood there and took it and thought of Matt and Jeremy and what they would tell me to do, not let it affect me..But then it just started getting to me and i couldnt take it anymore. I turned away from him and said i wasnt going to take it, and i started to walk upstairs. he grabbed me by my hair and hit me..thats all that is needed to know, except i left and when i got back they took my keys and wouldnt let me near a phone or computer...the rest of it is personal, so yeah...anyways.... i totally missed Jeremy like crazy! i still havent talked to him..and grr..I talked to Matt and at first he didnt wanna talk to me..that upset me and i guess im just emotional right now, so i started to cry ...but then he just told me he was worried and we talked about my dad and stuff, which made me feel better. I talked to Kris &!*&@*&!^@@^...yeah anyways, rofl. not worth typing for ;] I just read Layla's journal..erm i think she is falling for Jeremy..which...er..yeah..i wonder cause she just wrote about it yesterday, and she seemed like she didnt know we was back together...did he tell her?!....not important. anyways... erm yeah..im fixing to go pick up my sister and take her out for dinner, so i will be on later. Thank you to all my friends who have been there for me, and truly care. I love you Jeremy <3....My falling star...;] "Falling Star" And I'll drown... There are things that me smile, And one of them is you. It's like you came and cast a spell on me. I can't think of anyone else , I can't even think of myself. The one wish I had I used on you... I'm just thinkin so hard, I wished for you when I wished on that star. I wanna die in your arms, 'Cause you're my falling star There are times I have to smile, Because I think of you. It's like you came and stole my heart. I can't think of anyone else, I can't even think of myself. The one wish I had I used on you... I'm just thinkin so hard, I wished for you when I wished on that star. I wanna die in your arms, 'Cause you're my falling star And I'll drown in your eyes, And I'll choke from your kiss. And I'll drown in your eyes, And I'll choke from your kiss. And I'll drown in your eyes, And I'll choke from your kiss. And I'll drown in your eyes, 'Cause if I'm gonna die, I wanna die like this....... (1) Mandy & Jeremy Always

i l o v e my baby! [27 Dec 2003|08:03am] ..mmk..i just feel all...warm n tingly rofl.. i L O V E my baby soooo much!!!! hehe.... (2) Mandy & Jeremy Always

^!@@%@^$!^%$@ [27 Dec 2003|01:57am] [ mood | hyper ] [ music | _ Got it bad_ ] .....okay..lemme get this out...| screams | !^@&^!@%!@$$!$@%!#@%!@$!#@$!%@^!(@! heh...Me and Jeremy are back together ;] He asked me out..again..but yeah..im all excited and happy..;]] | giggles like a school girl | rofl. but yeah. i finally got what i wanted for Christmas..;] so yeah, that was the GOOD part of my day. Kris kinda seemed to get mad, and jeremy said she wasnt too happy...and wanna know the best part?!!?.... I D O N T G I V E A F U C K !! ;]] i dont give a fuck what people think of it ;] especially...nvm..rofl...anyways...YAY! lol. im so fucking hyper right now..lol..yeah...i gotta new sn ;]...its..TasteOfHiisTears...yeah, only one person knows the meaning behind it, well im sure a few others do too, if they pay attention to my homepage and stuff but yeah..erm i like my new sn? i used to make new sn's like..every week, but i havent made one in FOREVER. and this one is special..so yay. anywhO... Today wasnt the best kinda day..but erm it turned out goooood. Timmy called me today and wanted me to go hang out with him, so of course, i did. We decided to go to the movies, and we went to see Bad Santa..rofl hilarious movie/bad story line/and morally WRONG...rofl..it was funny tho...but..erm..Timmy told me he was in love with me and got upset cuz i didnt say it back to him..i cant say it back if i dont mean it..so yeah..idk what's going to happen with that kid there.. but timmy, i love ya kid. I talked to Sean last night <3 I guess he wants to start over with the New Year, but yeah..erm it seemed like he got upset with me cause im still in love with jeremy..i cant help it thO...everyone is getting upset with me over that, and once again. i dont give a fuck. if that makes me a selfish/uncaring person, oh well... Matthew...awww he called me on Christmas, but i was sleeping and therefore, didnt answer the phone. That would have made my Christmas much better, but yeah. its k tho. i just slept christmas away and didnt even get up til like, 10..| shrugz | my family hates me, and i dont like being around them that much anyways. i didnt even open my presents until like, midnight the next morning, so yeah. | shrugz | as if it matters that much.... rofl, damnit im all hyppppperrrrrr............ | rolls around | liiiiike a viiiiirgiiiiin...lmao, Chadwick said that to me a lil while ago..that kid is crazy ;] Anyways, imma get out of here, i still have to redo my profile. my profile hates me ;x rofl. ily guys<33 (¨`·.·´¨) (¨`·.·´¨) . `·.¸(¨`·.·´¨)¸.·´. `·.¸.·´iLu jeremy<3 _ Amanda_Ganqsta Mami_Mandy_MandaHo_Skank ;] _ liqable_mandii_TasteOfHiisTears_ Mandy & Jeremy Always

[27 Dec 2003|01:56am] [ mood | so majorly excited ;] ] "Shine" Just for that moment time stood still. Nothing mattered but the thrill of things to come and never knowin' where your goin'. A little nervous and out of practice, sweaty palms and an awkward silience. You pulled me closer for a kiss and I'm so scared to feel like this. Can't stop my hands from shakin'. I won't blink cause I might miss and I've waited way too long for this. The perfect words at the perfect time. The perfect song with the perfect rhyme compose the soundtrack to our night. Are you listening? Tonight the world will wait for us to say it's ok to move again. The stars will have to find another sky to shed some light cause this is our time to shine. Is there some place we could go to be alone? One last thing before you go. A little song to let you know that I never wanted to be anything but everything to you my dear. But I spoke too soft for you to hear me say, "I love you." Looks like it's happened to me once again. Things are over before they started, another goodbye, unless you want to...try and I'll promise you I'll try I promise I won't cry if you promise you won't forget. Mandy & Jeremy Always

[26 Dec 2003|09:37pm] [ mood | annoyed ] have you ever just looked into the mirror, and realized something you should have known/seen in your life, but you never did before? and then u feel like u just wanna kick yourself and disapear?! -smh... Mandy & Jeremy Always

- because u loved me - [25 Dec 2003|02:53am] [ mood | grateful ] [ music | Because You Loved Me ] - because you loved me - dedicated to Jeremy...my baby|ninja turtle|my squishy...my everything<3 For all those times you stood by me For all the truth that you made me see For all the joy you brought to my life For all the wrong that you made right For every dream you made come true For all the love I found in you I'll be forever thankful baby You're the one who held me up Never let me fall You're the one who saw me through through it all You were my strength when I was weak You were my voice when I couldn't speak You were my eyes when I couldn't see You saw the best there was in me Lifted me up when I couldn't reach You gave me faith 'cause you believed I'm everything I am Because you loved me You gave me wings and made me fly You touched my hand I could touch the sky I lost my faith, you gave it back to me You said no star was out of reach You stood by me and I stood tall I had your love I had it all I'm grateful for each day you gave me Maybe I don't know that much But I know this much is true I was blessed because I was loved by you You were my strength when I was weak You were my voice when I couldn't speak You were my eyes when I couldn't see You saw the best there was in me Lifted me up when I couldn't reach You gave me faith 'cause you believed I'm everything I am Because you loved me You were always there for me The tender wind that carried me A light in the dark shining your love into my life You've been my inspiration Through the lies you were the truth My world is a better place because of you You were my strength when I was weak You were my voice when I couldn't speak You were my eyes when I couldn't see You saw the best there was in me Lifted me up when I couldn't reach You gave me faith 'cause you believed I'm everything I am Because you loved me You were my strength when I was weak You were my voice when I couldn't speak You were my eyes when I couldn't see You saw the best there was in me Lifted me up when I couldn't reach You gave me faith 'cause you believed I'm everything I am Because you loved me I'm everything I am Because you loved me I dedicated this song to jeremy...Jeremy...I am who i am, because you opened your heart, and you loved me. You have given me strenth through everything, have helped me, advised me, held me...you are just anything i could ever want...everything i will ever want...confusion is an evil thing >.< but im dealing with it as each day comes, as im sure you are also doing. Just know im always right where you left me..i love you so much. Mandy & Jeremy Always

im sooo bored ;x lol [25 Dec 2003|01:28am] [ mood | horny ] You have an entrancing kiss~ the kind that leaves your partner bedazzled and maybe even feeling he/she is dreaming. Quite effective; the kiss that never lessens and always blows your partner away like the first time. What kind of kiss are you? brought to you by Quizilla woOt for me? lmao i dunno if this is true...but uh yeah...i didnt think i really had skill?! ;/ lmao What Do You Wear to Bed? Brought to you by Faytrial lmmfao...oh god..i sleep in panties sometimes ;] but usually nakie ;x shhhh im kinky like dat ;]] -Perfect- You're the perfect girlfriend. Which means you're rare or that you cheated :P You're the kind of chick that can hang out with your boyfriend's friends and be silly. You don't care about presents or about going to fancy placed. Hell, just hang out. You're just happy being around your boyfriend. What Kind of Girlfriend Are You? brought to you by Quizilla ...erm...yeah..this quiz was bs..if i was perfect....then yeah...no comment anyways... kinky isn't a feather...its using the whole damn chicken! and you kno it. you are so kinky that even you are afraid of yourself sometimes. What type of SEX do You enjoy? brought to you by Quizilla ..oh gawd...am i really that kinky jeremy?! lmmfao...i dont mean to be but damnnnnn.... anywhO..i got hella bored....damn im all kinds of horny now ;x....for..no..explained reason ;x...yeah yeah that certain someone knows what im taking out but yeah..;x lmao anyways .M E R R Y C H R I S T M A S guyz<333 ily... Mandy & Jeremy Always

RaWr....Washers [24 Dec 2003|11:01pm] [ mood | chipper ] [ music | Taste of tears ] -breaks into your blurty-..Hey baby...its ur ninja turtle and i told you i was gunna come writ sum stuff soooo i am..rofl they have a mood called "Chipper'..lol Chip would apperciate that one....i just read your last entry..i don't think your obsessed..-smh..fuck everyone else...and its ok for you to tell me you love me..cuz i love you too...probably more then you think and more then most other people think...guess who has a new song...ill put it at the end of this entry..but anywho..just so everyone knows...i love Amanda..-smh..alright i think my work is done here...<3Your SquishylYour Ninja TurtlelSpermy the Sex Care Bearl... Finding a way for my words to be spoken I never thought our front teeth could be broken all of the joy when I dream has been stolen I fell right through a trap door that I opened and there's no way that you'll turn my body away I'll blow away if you take you're body away and when there's a hole in my head you kiss me instead and the demons fall down dancing around my bed and the sky won't turn red when yo'ure in the bed so stay stay stay sell your soul to me this way I know you belong to me sell your soul to me this way I know you belong to me sell your soul to me I'm missing without you Too many times I've let love pass driving further away but I'm all out of gas never did I think I'd find you so I sit down and write these words in tribute don't push it away these words are sincere since you, my everday has been so clear I thank you for everything I truly do with this song please carry on and I'll be here thinking of you cause this time I finally got it figured out I'm missing without you in tribute we stand I'm missing without you [Chorus]-Me Mandy & Jeremy Always

......IT II IR IE ID.... [23 Dec 2003|11:48pm] [ mood | sleepy ] [ music | ........silence.......raWr <3 ] ..lol im sleepy...imma go lay down and...lay there...or something?...yeah i will update tomorrow.....u wont be able to read it..but yeah lol..imma make it private so no1 can read it..sorry guys ;]] imma have a bitch session for myself to relieve myself of stress...if u have my password, u can read it..jus get on my name but if u dont like what u see, i cant help u...im sorry? lol..but yeah....soooooo G O O D N I G H T.... (¨`·.·´¨) (¨`·.·´¨) .`·.¸(¨`·.·´¨)¸.·´.          `·.¸.·´iLy guyz<333......especially my S q u i s h y lol...i love him the mostest ;] | washers <3 | my ninja turtle<33 lmmfao | (1) Mandy & Jeremy Always

lmmfao imma nerdslut [22 Dec 2003|11:45pm] Nerdslut What's your sexual appeal? brought to you by Quizilla Imma nerdslut<333 thats a new one lmmfao but anyways...yeah i thought it was pretty damn funny....;] heh...arent i special ;] but anyways, imma go find a chat and entertain myself or something lol ;] (2) Mandy & Jeremy Always

...yay for mandy!!!!.... [22 Dec 2003|11:21am] [ mood | hopeful ] [ music | Lost in yOu_SugarCult ] ...mmk yeah...so the old mandy is back..woOt...;]] im all excited for myself again..i blocked everyone that causes drama..that has been the problem the whole time and stupid me, thought it would go away |smh|but yeah...so yesterday i pissed like...umm 124 of my buddies off and they blocked me and i deleted them from my bl ;] yeah...at first i was upset....but if they dont want anything to do with me, fiine. i will live...but yeah..so no more drama for mandy ;] the first person whO causes drama is gOne..period...well except matt, and thats nOt really drama..we just fight sometimes..and he hasnt tried to stop me from loving jeremy...he has always been accepting...so yeah ;] anywhO...today jeremy was like: |Jeremy| yeah, i was going to change my homepage, your just going to have to stay in it heh |Mandy| im not complaining ;] im not changing my homepage until u figure out what you want to do cause..like ur on every page? heh.... |Jeremy| rofl, yeah. |Mandy| yeah, dez made me a new layout for my blurty, but she said that if we got back together she would go back and redO it the way that it was... |Jeremy| its not if we are getting back together, its WHEN we are getting back together.. heh..im all..idk..anywhO...he said some stuff to me about being the old mandy..and about being his mandy and fuck everyone else....and..idk...i guess that snapped me out of it?..it was announced today that i was "the old mandy" in the middle of a chat...i was like...wooooo!! heh. im all anti-drama, and shit now..so im doing alot better...im still thinking bout making a new sn, but only because im tired of this one lol. oh yeah! my name isnt Mandy anymore? lmao...Jeremy changed it to Amanda and wont stop calling me that!! lol im all like...raWR but yeah...so mandy is running on |NOOOO| sleep lmao...woOt 52 hours awake...go me? im not even on anything....wOot.. well, now that i have updated..i think imma go try and sleep? lol heh... I just wanna say FUCK YOU...to all the people on my hit list whO M A D E my life difficult...u dont have the chance to affect me anymore, so F U C K Y O U ;]..i wont name any names hear, but im pretty damn sure u guys know exactly whO you are ;] Thanx to all my true friends who have always been there for me....: |dez|cami|matt|jeremy((even though we have been through a tough time lately and i dont give a fuck what any1 says, cuz they dont know ;] ))|grant, even tho ur a diick sometimes lmmfao|Carlos|Brian|Reha| yOu guys are the best..<3 ..Even though some of THESE people hate me, i still wanna say thanx to them for being there for me and putting up with my shit for so long before they gave it up: Sean..yOu was always there for me when i needed you..i guess i am the ungrateful bitch u said i was ;/ im really sorry and you do mean so much to me, but i know you dont need the drama any more than i do so i will just leave it alone..i love ya hun, and thank you...|Jay..NOT af lacrosse1 |Him| Will u still love me if im a ninja turtle? |Me| Of course, i will even love u if your a ninja turtle<3 XoX Jeremy is my S Q U I S H Y <333 lmao XoX Mandy & Jeremy Always

....frustrated beyond comprehension.... [22 Dec 2003|06:30am] [ mood | pissed off ] [ music | BITE ME!! GAWD I DONT WANT GOD DAMN MUSIC RIGHT NOW! ] .........i..need..to..relieve...stress.....^%$%$#@$#!#%^$^%%^*)**(&%#@@!@@!..... - Takes a deep breath -.....lets see..lets list everything that has happened/been said to me tonight.... | chadwick likes me | imma whore | imma slut | im ungrateful| im a slut | im a skank no1 cares about | i wasnt good enough for jeremy, and he got tired of not being able to get some from other people so he dumped me| i lost 123...no wait...124 buddies...|i hate myself | i want jeremy back| david talked to me for the first time in a long time | imma jealous ho because i got upset over people flirting with jeremy|everyOne hates me | i dont care about anything | i dont care about anyone but myself| im selfish| i should kill myself| i should disapear off the face of the planet| imma satanic whore....| im a bitch, but that isnt new now is it? I could go on, but im depressing myself....god..im sick and tired of all this fucking bullshit..Im sick and tired of all of this....D R A M A.....-growlz-...i dont care anyone what people think of me..i cant H E L P that im in love with jeremy..i cant H E L P i want him back more than anything....I CANT HELP THERE ARE JEALOUS WHORES IN HIS GOD DAMN GOD FOR SAKEN FUCKED UP WORLD!!!!.........GRRRR anyways.....now that im done being a " psycho/insane/freaking psycho biitch"..im going to go back to the chat because people are getting mad at me, even though i dont feel like talking anyways....|growlz| | imma biitch and i dont care...say what u will.....I WILL STILL BE HERE!!! | (3) Mandy & Jeremy Always

...what the fuck is wrong with me.... [21 Dec 2003|08:56pm] [ mood | disappointed ] [ music | _Until the day i die_Story of the Year_ ] ....What the fuck is wrong with me?...one minute im happier, then im sad...then im pissed..and then im depressed....now, im pissed....jeremy is now talking about making a new sn...he is leaving me...he isnt mine..and now he is leaving me all together....MOTHER OF A FUCKING WHORE &@@*&^!!@%!$!%$!@#@!% -growls- he thinks it's going to make it easier?........for who?....not for him..he might he think it will but...idk he will miss the people he left behind...maybe not all of him (( cough _me_ cough))....but idk...i cant think..it just hurts to much to see him leave me alOne...once again...im alOne...-sigh-...maybe i should just stay that way and make shit easier for everyOne who might like me at some point . i will jus..have to write later..i thought i could but i cant right now...i just want him to come back to me...-sigh- Oh, and one more thing..im fixing to make this a Friends Only Journal...im tired of EVERYONE knowing my business, when none of this is even about them...they dont comment on it, they just read it and talk about it randomly to people who are in chats and shit..wtf??? anyways...i will chose who i want to read it ;] (2) Mandy & Jeremy Always

@&@*@^^%@& [21 Dec 2003|12:51am] [ mood | pissed off ] [ music | _ beneath my skin_linkin park_ ] OMFG.....GRRR..i just want to......idk...idk....god im all shakey and pissed now.....she is SUCH a lieing fucking whore...god, if she is going to go whine to jeremy about it, the least she could do is tell the god damn truth....JESUS....my head is pounding.....im so.....GAH....okay..wOw..so she fucked jeremy right after we broke up...all i said to her: [mandy] if u ever tell me your sorry again..i swear to fucking god...your just like every other trifflin hO i know. [breezy] wtf did i do to you? [mandy] okay. u sit here and tell me how sorry you are that me and jeremy broke up...about how u understand...and then u go and fuck him? wtf is that all about?!? u know damn well u didnt care that we broke up...u just wanted his cock again...god... [breezy] yeah okay whatever bye [mandy] haha ya, u didnt think i would find out did u?...yeah i already had it figured out because of your journal..and jeremy confirmed it..god u are such a hO [what jeremy said she said] shes like...ur a fucking whore u slut, u never cared about me or jeremy, u juss want his cock and he only wants ur pussy and ur a fuckin cunt... GOD I HATE LIARS!! ^^!$@%$!@%#@!) ..........blah blah blah...i want to write..but now jeremy is talking about going away and shit like he is the cause of everyone's problems..he did so much shit tonight.....gawd i just dunno what to do...what can i do to convince him how much he means to me?....nOthing..nothing i ever do is enough to people...they refuse to open their eyes and see what is sitting dead in front of them.....i jus...idk....im going over the edge..im hitting stuff..and i just wish it was breezy!!!!!! - kills her- gawd...Jeremy thinks he has to do with our drama but he doesnt...this is between us...she started this..and im going to end it..im making a new sn and giving it to only my true friends..the rest of the people on here can go to hell. im tired of it. -growls- im going to end up beating someone to death, or literally committing murder......i think im going to a party in like, 45 minutes at Daq's...he called and offered to come pick me up..i mean, since everyone else is fucking, why cant i too? idk i just wanna get fucked up.....im oUt. _1o.17.o3-12.19.o3 @ 7:14 p.m._ things wont ever be the same ;/ _ (1) Mandy & Jeremy Always

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