fucking is such a blur.   
09:05pm 30/10/2003
 
mood: lonely
music: michele branch - breathe
yea i kno i havent updated in a while. i havent really been up to it. lotsa crap going on lately. i slept for like 4 hours today when i got home from school. i dont know why. i hate the way i've been feeling these days. i mean sometimes im fine and sometimes even better than fine but most of the time im just miserable. i just feel so alone. everyone is pulling me in a million directions and i dont want to go to any of them. all i want to do is lay in bed and be miserable all day. cause we all kno thats healthy right lol.
Michele kind of flipped out on me today. George was in with us today for 7th period. and bla bla bla it kind of came out that i cut myself. i didnt really want to tell everyone but i kind of got backed into a corner so yea. Michele was all like what the hell is wrong with you?! im like gee thanks cause i didnt already feel bad enough about myself. lol.
i just feel so alone and i couldnt ever tell anyone this because then everyone all like well what about me you're not alone and bla bla bla and then i just feel like crap for making everyone feel bad. fucking christ i just hate everybody and i hate myself even more.
  
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