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Tuesday, February 14th, 2012
8:50a
Well what a night....had one of the weirdest dreams I've had in a while......one I'm pretty sure was a vampire one..it was really quite bizarre.....all I can remember is there was a large warehouse.....and there were a couple of vampires in it.....breeding I think.....and in one of the rooms.....there was blood smeared all around the four walls near the roof...and I looked into the box.....and it was full of all these rats....that just slowly disappeared until there was one maggot left in the box....like I said really weird....
and I was traveling really fast down this road...and it changed to a road just around the corner from here...it had been updated with paths....and every 20 meters there were talking stobie polls...


Strange gear for the last two nights at about 2:00 in the morning...although couldn't say for sure....I've had to go outside and get the cat...who starts crying....off the roof...don't ask me how it gets up there....and I awoke to find one of my lip glosses in Claws food box....which sure....it probably fell off my desk....but you know...if it did fall...it's hard to believe it would have landed the way I found it.....

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8:52a
My bodies pretty sore....and its Valentines Day....so Happy Valentines Day from here.....

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9:56a
How's that ...I just rang the lawyers again, the same one from last week, spoke with reception trying to determine why no call back as yet....and apparently the person it was handed to just went or came of child leave or some other similar thing...
So I started asking a few more questions like do they have a manager in the office who know's the work loads of the lawyers....answer no...it's left up to a receptionist....


You know why I think that's the case.....one cost cutting so that the receptionist doesn't end up having to be paid a managers wage....but lets face it...at the moment...I gather from the dialogue with the receptionist she wouldn't be a suitable manager anyway.... you know the "Dolly" kind.
I mean I don't mind a Dolly who's professional but a dolly that's a kid answering a phone for personal. often hurtful and emotional calls....well I'm just pissed off actually...

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9:59a
But you know what I want to say on top of that.....that every fucking lawyer in the book...presents a professional image....yet not one fucking law firm that I've spoken to it....carries the job off... to completion....so it's either the lawyers or their receptionists....

In fact there's only one lawyer I know in Adelaide who I have met with....which no doubt...most likely I'm going to have to end up calling because they are the only one that's ever really shown me that they're professional lawyers....

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10:00a
Sorry about the language....but last time I did speak to them...years ago....it wasn't a case they had experience in..

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10:29a
..you see what's happened....just got through to a lawyer...and it's one I did speak with previously...and you know what....it still can go to court...but I need to get moving on it...and of course...you know what two very different aspects come through....one between what goes on in Law School and two...what goes on in the business world....and I think I've mentioned this before...you have two...fundamentally different principles in practice...the principles of ethics and the principles of capitalism.

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10:31a
....and you know what....I mean I could use the information that I just received....fact is I called the District Courts to get the paperwork...and they led me on a wild goose chase...

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10:32a
I mean for the most part I've been acting as my own lawyer chasing the paperwork down...and you can't say that a lawyer would have been able to do it any quicker...

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10:33a
You know it is a very tricky situation....because the bottom line is profit...or at least that's what came across with the organization that I just spoke with.....

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10:35a
You know I don't mind paying money...but you know when people say the law is a Gamble...you know I don't go to a lawyer to take on a gamble...

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10:36a
...and it's the same thing...if someone's telling me from day one they think it's a gamble...you know without an appointment without knowledge...it's like telling me...it's rigged...

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10:36a
Anyway ...I'm going to go to the District Court most likely this week ....I've got an appointment in the city...and see what's going on there...

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10:40a
I am so fed up with the bullshit I've gone through here...and I said this....exactly the same...after speaking with this person before..you know...to get put through to the same person once again...when they've got three firms...I just think...hmmmm..

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10:44a
I mean...I'd like to be able to say.......yeah this place is great because of this...this and this....but you know what...the absolute ruthlessness of people...I mean even down to the foundations of which Australia was built upon...the whole world legal framework....etc...

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10:46a
I just can't even formulate what I think mentally....because this kind of gear goes beyond any kind of thoughtful consideration. You know it is people at their worst....not best...that's my opinion.

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10:48a
You know what I need done....in terms of the thing...is very simple.....and speaking to the lawyer....you know he say's it's very complex....fact is....it can be broken down into about four simple tasks... but in this case you know up front his already asking me the sum of 15 day's full work....at lawyers rates...

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10:50a
So I immediately don't get a good feeling about it....I mean getting a good feeling from lawyers full stop...isn't something you say...oh yeah that's great...I just think...hang on a minute....that seems like something I'm not prepared to pay....unless I can gauge how the works being done and the time frame....

..which also reminds me I need to get back on to my own gear now...

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10:57a
...so the only thing....I can say is....started out a great morning....got very upset.....and now....just feel really pissed off.....because what is going on here...as in most life I guess.....is a series of plays...by people....families...and industries...

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10:58a
But I do have one I can get back to....I told them I'll let them know in two weeks...hopefully I can get through the rest of the calls in that time....and no I'm not gleaming industry knowledge...

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10:59a
I'm just trying to find a legal firm...which handles the work how I need it to be done.....no major complications...

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11:17a
Probably I need to get two letters out reasonably quickly to both Dental groups that did the periodontal work...and offer them an opportunity to negotiate...before instigating legal proceedings....

...but what I don't need is a lawyer that's going to talk around the bush.... .

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1:14p
So I am down to choosing between the last five con figs for this section....I was in the worst mood...till I started listening to this...and actually thought it would put me in a worse mood....because it hasn't actually been the easiest section of the track...did catch about 20 min's sun before I started on it...which was enough....have got a headache....but that's mainly due to the emotional gear I went through earlier with the lawyer....you know it clogs up my head....and then...I have to kind of clear it again...before moving on...

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1:17p
Sooo....going to stop for 10 min's before making a final choice...its really a clarity of sound issue....and if its going to work with what I've done for this section...

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1:19p
My ear is a real tender mess..but also some slight scabbing over the hole.....not that pleasant to talk about...but slightly relevant to how I'm feeling.
But probably does not even touch upon how I'm feeling in terms of what is going on with the structures within society and the way it's being run...

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1:33p
But you know...the same gear came up when I spoke with SATAC yesterday....when reapplying...they look at a grade point average....and I still say...that's probably another possible reason why that first subject was marked so low...to bring my grade point down..

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1:34p
..and it just got me thinking about Matriculation and how they really...just about failed me twice....

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1:35p
You know it does not make sense....intellectually, mathematically or empirically... the stuff around's that I've had in the education system here.....and now well you start seeing the reasons why....rather than just seeing it as a....hmmm maybe I'm not that good at that...

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1:36p
...and sure generally I say things in the Blurty...that normally I wouldn't say out loud...

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1:37p
It was one of the reasons I was going to make it a private blurty....but they changed the mechanics I think...and I've always said it...it's just the best way I've found to keep a record of certain things...

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1:39p
And you know what when I reapply with SATAC....I get issues a whole new registration number..which I thought was interesting.....you'd think the one you have would be still current... .

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1:41p
You know so many things are way too absurd....I mean America hits it's legal debit limit in a few billion dollars...where the system basically say's it's no longer legal for them to do it...that's some 14 Billion odd dollars over drawn....

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1:42p
...and anyone who does make sense is locked out....because....currently the law supports mathematically absurdities because business is trying to make a profit from someone... even when who ever they're trying to do it from....has no money...

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1:43p
...and it seems like there's no one like an Education System these day's to stand as one of the biggest culprits doing it......but hey...guess who's got an interest in you getting to know their laws...

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1:44p
Bankrupted...world political leaders....

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1:44p
..and of course...the next of kin.

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1:45p
Anyway....back to this track...after this will make any final note arrangement changes....you'll hear about it when it's done...and its time to move on....

still in a pretty bad mood....from what was actually going to be a fairly nice day...

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1:47p
Probably what's still playing in the back of my mind...is the fact here...I've said this before....it's majority Church Schools....and that is predominately a male lead industry as well...

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1:49p
Not an anti-male statement....however significant recognition as to issues for woman....and I've said it all before...probably can't say it any more precisely other than....I am concerned by the actions of members of society...

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1:50p
You know...I wouldn't want to say...one person...one thing...is responsible....because to a great extent...actions of history can be to blame in some instances...

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1:52p
...and who knows how many people out there....basically want pay back...from people who never by their actions did anything....you know...political and military leaders...and from the chain down...are responsible for what's going on in society today.

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1:52p
You know some of it....there's nothing wrong...but if people are being wronged....they know about it...

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1:54p
...and anyone who's done any reading will say...and I haven't done any on this..but the general consensus when it comes to bank loans....is that the loaner....wants control.....and everything is done....too control.

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1:55p
Control isn't such a bad things...but take legal fees for example....a good example where no controls have lead to suffering for others...

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1:55p
..so that's all I'm going to say...

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1:57p
I know what's responsible for my shitty day...and what to some extent has been a reasonable life....has still been a shitty life in terms of what reasonable people expect in life....not to be held in economic bondage and limited in wealth creation due to salary ...wage increases....benefits...etc...going to everyone else..

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2:02p
...and I still don't have enough knowledge on this...but it just seems the whole political empire building by different civilizations was not really considerate to the civilizations that were taken over in many instances by war...

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2:03p
..military...and Church groups....

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2:04p
...and since then of course...you've had all number of different societies building different networks...support groups...secret services...etc...etc..

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2:05p
...so I think last time I said this...and don't forget time is still repeating at this stage....you know I had read over some 6 months ago Whitney died...which you probably wouldn't believe...I can't even understand it myself...but I think you'll find that time fragment is going to collapse on itself soon....

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2:06p
..and to some extent....some things will be new....but I was just as shocked last time I read it...that's all I do remember...

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2:13p
You know it's really strange....but there's only one event that I remember reading about....which hasn't happened...which I think still is going to happen...unless I got the dates mixed up....

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2:13p
..that's really weird I think...

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3:55p
Well I just finish picking that bowl of black berries....and I wont be doing that in a hurry for a while....also finished selecting the con fig...so now back to the instrumentation.....

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4:57p
Yeah well ...how about...."I hope the bottom of it falls so far out of the thing.....you find it in the bottomless pit of hells existence...."...for you Wall Street kind of guy...

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4:58p
...."How about....we take woman out of the market place equation....so that your male existence...no longer is an equation....."....for your keeping your voice down types...

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5:00p
..."How about I send you your Valentines gift....with the bill for your smart ass types..."...

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5:01p
How about I tell this to your mixed message types....
"I do not like you go away....in fact I hate you....but on my day's off......I do considering thinking of ways I could like you....PS...I don't get days off...

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5:03p
...How about...I'm not getting a husband....so as to not...having to give a shit about his affairs....


I mean my dating advice is quite long for woman...who at the end of the day...could not really give a shit about what men like or expect...unless they're being nice doing it...

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6:22p
Of course reality might not be that extreme...but it's amazing how adaptive woman become when confronted by male ignorance...

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6:24p
..of course they can become manipulative...two timing...sexually aggressive...just like men...

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7:07p
I mean the other bit...about their credit rating...you know..no body know's someone's credit rating unless you ask them personally....and if you find it out elsewhere...you've done something you shouldn't have already....so how's a relationship going to last if it starts out like that......


...that's why I don't like that kind of crap...

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7:24p
The other thing is....if I'm in a relationship....I usually have a good one.....because there is a level of understanding between myself and the person I'm seeing.....you know marriage is not the reason I enter into a relationship....if it eventuates...it's probably a very committed relationship...
...but that kind of chemistry...mix....etc....doesn't happen that much.....these day's marriages are becoming more business partnerships...than actual romantic engagements....

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7:25p
...so you know.....I stand clear till I get a nice mix....

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7:27p
...and if it works it works if it doesn't it doesn't....

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7:30p
But relationships in terms of a sexual partner on the side...is a big no go for me....and if I'm with a partner like that....well they must be mistaken....because they're not my partner....

simple as that .

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7:33p
if we break up over another woman....break up...simple as that....and I think maybe once...I got back together with someone....but it ended ... and stayed that way...
...best break up I ever had actually.

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7:40p
Now well there's this "Guy"....and there still is...

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7:42p
...but I think his trying to get rid of me...which isn't too hard...

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7:42p
...but he certainly is a lot of fun....when we get an opportunity to meet up..

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7:45p
...and there are a couple of nice men...out and about at the moment....so you know...always something to be doing...even if its not hopping into bed...

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7:46p
..so yeah...his still my current "Sweetie"...

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8:06p
..and the thing about dresses.....you know I was thinking about wearing dresses in 2013 for a change.....you know...like...I might wear dresses for a year..something like that......but I'm going to go fairly wild in my "wear dresses period"..you know... I've got a few sitting here just waiting...but I'll probably mash them up with a few light weight...boat pant's underneath....

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8:09p
...you know...I've got a few ...nice surreal looks coming together...

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8:09p
...and now I'm going to bed.....soooo goodnight....

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