Thursday, January 26th, 2012
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12:16a
..okay...time for some munchies and moving on ..
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1:04a
Now where does it go ?
http://www.lipcrack.com/chest.jpg
Expect cool, calm and captivated.....what ever I'm doing.
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4:12a
...tonight didn't really go to plan....it's not a good thing...it's not a bad thing.....I would have liked to have completed a bit more of the track....but I got side tracked....and not an A side to B side flip either.....totally de-railed.....straight off the tracks and into a few cushioned walls that I keep myself padded in.....
...so now....well after knocking my head this way and that...shaking what ever nuts and bolts are loose in there and coming out of it....with a few of them more screwed together...
I can say its time to go to bed.....I've got paperwork to get through tomorrow....and currently that is the only plan....
yes...the walls keep talking to me telling me about other perfect worlds....but I think you'll find like most things...often they're found in dreams....... a characterization of a morbid personality...
..now if the walls call speak...my language..what other things do you think they'd try to tell me....besides...the fact they seem to collapse around me....every time we meet......
Yeah I've been butting my head against a wall...like they but those butts in astray's.....but the nicotine probably doesn't effect my head as much as the cement...
goodnight....when only words will do.
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2:56p
well I'm up just getting started on the day...
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4:15p
Getting busy with gear....this is going to seem strange but someone asked me if I'd put a link to their site in here via e-mail..
..I don't really see any problem with it....
http://motorcycleaccident.org.
So there it is...
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4:23p
Who knows why they did it...maybe there's some ulterior motive...but you know...if it's about accidents on the road...its like telling a Pro-footballer not to join the foot ball team because...
he'll get a cracked rib or a head injury...etc...etc...you know I could trip on the carpet and break my neck...so what...am I not going to walk on carpet....?
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5:49p
Well you won't believe it....but I've just gone to fill out the last of the weeks Job Applications in the Job Seeker diary....and it's gone....vanished....no longer in my room as far as I know....the interesting thing is....it's pretty much the priority document of my paperwork at the moment so it's on the top of any paperwork I have....and second most of my paperwork's in folders at the moment...but that item sits on top of it...
anyway it's fair enough to say....it missing... and it's actually an important document that I need to refer too.. in terms of following up with these Job Agencies... .
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5:50p
so I only had about five more job applications to fill out for this week which I'll do now...
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5:52p
But you know what it's exactly what happened last time....and if Centerlink say's anything about it....I'll just ask for another one...and do the same thing I did last time...because I followed a fairly methodical process...in terms of the documents that were provided by the Job Network Agency....
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5:53p
..thing is.. I filled it in either early this week or late last week ....so it's gone in the space of about five days...and as far as I know...I've been home each day....
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6:00p
You want to know what the interesting thing is though.....in about two weeks....they move me on to the next part of the program...which...if you think about it...and I have said...already there's grounds for some of those Job Agencies to come into question...bit of a convenient scam if you ask me.
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6:08p
Actually I did leave the house to go to the post office a couple of days ago.
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9:32p
You know it's a weird situation ....you wake up happy from the images you've seen, the dream doesn't necessarily reflect what your feeling.....but it's either a part of your subconscious, or an alter reality......then the channels you switch to start imputing another reality.....Christian values which are values....but do they reflect the heart....and can you say emotions are driven by anything other than feelings which are very different to values that someone is trying to imprint over feelings....that is how I feel.....of course....it's all just a game of reality....and there's a past calling out and say's all the things you could have had....but the guilt transference in the parting.....is different to the reality that existed in the time and space of the relationship...
Relationships are good until they end....and even when they end they still seem to go on....because then they move to a form of battle in a new regulated system....and depending on the socio-cultural aspects of that space....a very important consideration in any final battle....history and an understanding of what is and was one's culture before it's over written becomes the consideration of importance....
It would be true to say my heart is currently in three places..one where it feels it's letting go of the past...and two in a place where it is finding itself again....
If the dream was an indication that would say it's in a forth dimension but that would seem absurd...
...so friends and romance are always a part of everyday...
...until the heart falls in love....and then everything gets taken away....what a curious thing....this love is....
One can talk endlessly about love when they have experienced it....to admire someone from a distance is a form of love in itself...
....let me admire you some more...
...now I have work to do......
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11:30p
Well just finished putting through some job applications, good thing I kept most of the received application receipts....I'll need to run a copy of that off for the Centerlink office.
Now well absolutely the last thing I want to be doing today...but need to get it done...is format and run off the notes from the second lecture series....I don't think I'll worry about running off the elective topic....till I get back into the course.....
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