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[05 Apr 2003|12:13am] |
I'm ericka's lemming:
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[01 Apr 2003|04:02am] |
Oh and I watched the tape of our performance of The Vagina Monologues tonight, as Phil and Sam managed to put some raw footage together. Apart from getting over the disturbance of actually hearing myself on stage, I'm so amazed at how fantastic it was. Being backstage on the night meant I only heard bits and pieces of it, but watching it back I saw how all the performers overcame the little issues of the dress rehearsal and were totally with it.
I was laughing and clapping along, it totally took me back there. I'm definitely writing the campaign into the Female Rep job description, the Union should do this every year. Apart from the fact we raised a lot of money, we in the cast and crew had a complete blast, it was so much fun!
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[01 Apr 2003|03:54am] |
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Yee-haw! I bought another typewriter from ebay! Possibly the coolest colour ever! I'm so looking forward to using it on perhaps some zine type material. And just generally pretending I'm from the 50s. Which would rock.
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[31 Mar 2003|12:38am] |
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Many an evening spent in the Union has been finished off by a stint kicking up our heels to Stomp on the Dance Machine. Never did I realise that you could actually buy them for the Playstation, and thus spare the embarrassment of messing up in public! I want one! I'm asking one of the rellys to get it for my birthday, hours of fun!!!
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[29 Mar 2003|08:27pm] |
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God, I fucking hate obnoxious men. Fucking stupid fucking student men. We were sitting the in pub for a quiet Sunday afternoon tea, and it was quiet, minding our own business. Then a couple of guys came in, drunk out of their heads and began to be general dickheads. Now I'm not bothered by the fact they were drunk, it's a pub after all. But I can be drunk and have a giggle without annoying everyone in sight. Banging on the table and generally shouting abuse at people is not acceptable. And quite apart from anything else it makes you look like a prat. And wait, You don't want to sleep with me? Good. Why you'd imagine that would shake my world I don't know. You're no oil painting either pal, sorry to burst your bubble.
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[29 Mar 2003|02:06pm] |
It's overcast today yet warm and sunny. It somehow feels a bit like fate finally paying me back for a year and a half of misery when i first got here by making my last couple of months now I love it nice and memorable. It will be a bit of a wrench to leave. I won't miss the work aspect, and the not-getting-it all the time, but I'll miss my friends terribly, and the place (when it's sunny).
I'm wearing my blue halter neck, and to reflect the fact i've recently decided not to give a fuck, I don't even care that/if my arms look fat in it. I've come to a bit of a realisation about my body image. I think most of the reason I care so much about it is because I think I *ought* to. Like I have to apologise. Fuck that. I don't really care about it that much. Sure I'd like some of the really doody clothes I see in shops that don't go above a 14, but there's more to life. Interestingly, shops seem to be reacting to that lately.
I've become conscious of the sense of dread after I speak to someone who mentions 'Oh you look slimmer.' Often, it's immediately followed by 'Keep it up' or something to that effect. Keep it up till when? Till I fade away into nothing? And people get embarrassed when I talk about myself as being fat. 'Don't be silly' or 'No, you're not' is the usual reaction. Of course I am!!! I'm probably in the medical category of obese, for my age. Maybe I'm still giving off the reaction that I'm ashamed. But then, act to cheery about it and you're covering up. I don't particularly mind referring to myself as fat. I mean, thin people do, why the hell shouldn't I, if I don't mind it.
People on the internet seem to do that quite effectively. But unfortunately it mostly seems to be in America. The indie culture there is so widespread and easy to find though. Or from my perspective it seems to be. It's unheard of in England. Or I haven't run into it in any case. Maybe I should do what they do in The Vagina Monologues. Reclaim fat.
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[29 Mar 2003|03:12am] |
When I've finished my dissertations I'm going to start all those little projects I've been wanting to do for ages, but haven't because I've always said I shouldn't start them because of uni work. No more procrastination crap.
1. Make my own 'anthology'. Nicked from 52projects.com. I really like this idea. There are so many pictures and poems and bits from books out there that I would love to be able to collect together and look at whenever I want. This is at the moment impossible. But with an anthology, no more! Plus I suppose it'll be interesting to look back on. I'm keen on having things to leave behind, just in case the generations in front are as interested in family history as me, and might end up looking for things like that.
2. When I get home, sort through the family photos and put them in photo albums. For the last 21 years our family photos have been sitting in the paper folders you get them back in. They need to be in albums, in order. It's driving me mad. When I'm earning, I'm going to sort them out. While resisting the urge not to chuck out any with Dad on. lol
3. Make my zine. If I go through all the stuff I've collected and think it's interesting enough to be released to the globe.
4. Sort out my crap. I go through it every now and then, and in sections. So bits that should be together are in different boxes, and bits that should be thrown, aren't. If I'm moving into my own house in June, I want my shit together.
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[29 Mar 2003|12:54am] |
I went to the lil piggy (pet name for our halls bar - The Pig and Rat) with Sarah and a couple of her friends. The talk, as usual, was pretty crude, but it was fun. It's interesting, you can have vulgar conversations in a mixed group and somehow it always revolves around sex, and a little flirting. Which can get uncomfortable. But when it's just girls, it's all crude yet harmless fun. Mostly because you know you're just making it up for the hell of it, and it's not like you're really that crude in real life (well, not often), and there's nothing threatening about it. One of those chances to be a different person for a couple of hours. It helps if you have a few drinks as well.
I did make Sarah spit out her drink at one point though. She called me a bad girl and raised her glass and drank. There was a pause, at which point I said 'Given half the chance.'
And spit.
Guess I shocked her.
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[28 Mar 2003|08:19pm] |
It's been a long time since I had a blog. I never usually keep them up for long, but I suppose there's a first time for everything.
At the moment I'm mostly spending every waking minute working on my dissertations. History has to be in next Wednesday, and American Studies in May. I can't wait for May. I don't even care if I'm a graduate or not. I just want it all to be over.
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