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[12 May 2008|02:04pm] |
Eek so being exam week and all I've had zero time to think, let alone write. This weekend was okay. It was relaxing in the sense that I didn't drink a single thing all weekend. That's something that hasn't happened in awhile. We went to Six Flags for Timmys birthday and while it was fun - it was entirely too stressful. Steve showed up 45 minutes late with our tickets so Dan and I had to sit outside while everyone was having a fun time. Then, once inside I was told I couldn't set my backpack on the opposite side of rollercoasters anymore so I had to return it to the car. When we got home Racquel locked her keys in the car with my cell phone inside. And by 11 oclock I realized my wallet had gone missing somewhere in the middle of the day and I had to cancel every credit card and gas card.
I wasn't even upset about the cards though. There was so much sentimental value to that wallet. I had pictures from when I was 10 years old in there that I'll never get back. Along with notes, ticket stubs, and 1000 other memories. Along with all this were my 7 IDs from my years at MVP that show my progression over each year. And to top it off my fake ID was in the side of it. Sweet deal. and Six Flags were such jerks they wouldnt even give me the option of filing a lost item form.
On a good note - I was able to get my kitty Saturday night. I named him Kingston like the city in Jamaica (no! not like sean kingston ; i'm not that homosexual thanks). He reminds me of a dog in the sense that he follows me everywhere I go. He's asleep on my lap right now as I type this.
I'm on my way out to my parents house. I'm going to stay out there pretty late, maybe even spend the night. I have 10 two page papers to write and Tanya gets back from the Bahamas at 11. I'm going to surprise her with flowers and a card. I think it'll make her happy.
Byeee loves.
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[12 May 2008|03:41pm] |
Someone just posted this to emoleericks and it made me think back:
if for one minute you think you're better than a sixteen year old girl in a green day t-shirt, you are sorely mistaken. remember the first time you went to a show and saw your favorite band. you wore their shirt, and sang every word. you didn't know anything about scene politics, haircuts, or what was cool. all you knew was that this music made you feel different from anyone you shared a locker with. someone finally understood you.
this is what music is about.
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I've been thinking back to my high school days. I remember actually quoting sometime in 10th or 11th grade that if these truly were supposed to be the best days of my life I didn't know how I was going to make it to college. I didn't mean that in any emotional sense other than the fact that I hated my high school hahah. But I don't know - I feel like last year if I thought back to my sophomore and junior years running around St. Johns shows I pictured myself happy - but these past few months the more I look back, the more I am just reminded of how much of a struggle high school was for me. How half of the times we were at those shows I was hiding somewhere else wondering how I was ever supposed to fit in - crying because I didn't fit in with people from school and then hanging out with my friends at shows was like throwing myself into this polar opposite universe. Nothing ever made sense. I always saw myself as not fitting in - completely unaware that despite my insecurities maybe I really had.
I think living with Racquel has been good for me. We kind of come from similar high school backgrounds. She used to go to all the same shows I do. She knows all the same old 'scene' lyrics I do. But most importantly, I didn't know her back then, and she remembers me. She remembers that I used to wear my green hoodie to every damn show and that I was friends with Max Kleban and Ashly. I guess I just felt growing up that I was always trying to convince myself I belonged with those people, rather than feeling it. But when I walked upstairs in my volcom hoodie a few months back and Racquel blurted out that she remembered I used to wear it to every show it just settled something inside of me - because even if I hadn't seen myself as fitting in, someone else who wasn't close to me did.
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On another note I set all of moms Mothers Day flowers up and it looks beautiful. I can't wait for her to come home. I had this weird flashback today of two Mothers Day's ago. I came home from school with not one, but two bouquets of flowers. It was Friday and Gail was cleaning our house that day and when I walked in and handed one to my mom and one to Gail and her jaw dropped and she almost began to cry.
I'm not usually into Hallmark Holidays but I've always liked Mothers Day - I think my mom deserves a day of appreciation.
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