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[17 Feb 2008|01:50pm] |
It's Sunday. Where did the weekend go? I feel like running. I woke up this morning exhausted, but wanting nothing more than to put on my running shoes and get outside. I have 45 minutes until I have to leave for work. I could easily go run an easy mile in 7:30 without breaking a sweat but I'm scared. Isn't that pathetic? I'm scared to find out my talent is no longer an easy one. I'm afraid I won't finish - that I'll have one of those asthma-like attacks I get ever since the hookah entered my life.
I'm listening to Wyclef right now. I can't believe I'm going to be in Hopetown this time three days from now. It's so exciting. It's going to be my time to wind down and just relax. None of my friends will be there except for Clint, Justin, Souv, Sarah, Atti, and Mike. I feel like I'm going to be spending all my time with Sarah. My relationship with Clint has dwindled away - we're not really friends anymore. It's weird but I remember realizing it the day I sprinted down to the Russell's over the luggage incident - we both stood in the kitchen for 30 minutes with nothing to say. The only exchange of words now are over where his sister is.
Souve and I re-bonded last time. He talked to me about racism on the island. How the most racist issue was that there were night lights over the baseball field but not the basketball field (and that was it). I remember wanting to laugh. To me his idea of racism was so minuscule to what was here. but it hit me - I can't laugh at him because to him this really is a problem. I used to get so frustrated because my problems seemed insignificant to the real world. To me my problems were real problems - if I were to laugh at Souve and tell him what real racism was it would hurt his feelings so much. Not because it's the topic of racism, but because I'd be making his pain seem insignificant when it might very well be justified.
It funny how much bonding can occur on a barstool. I've learned more about myself and other people over a few drinks. It's not even the alcohol - it's the surrounding. I mean think about the concept of a bar. It's where people go to share their stories and hear the tales of others. The best thing about Hopetown is everyone has a label. There are so many stories to tell it's unbelievable. My favorite addition to Cap'n Jacks is the sign that hangs above the bar: 'Hopetown is too small to have a town drunk so we all take turns'. It's the truth - every night is a different persons night haha.
Anyway - now I really have no time left. I guess this means no running? Yeah - I would use anything as an excuse not to face it right now. Time to get ready for work.
-- ♥
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| you've got me almost melting away |
[17 Feb 2008|11:29pm] |
Those days of warm rains come rushing back to me
Miles of windless, summer night air
Secret moments shared in the heat of the afternoon
Out of the stillness, soft spoken words
Inventory night. What a dreadful experience. It wasn't so much bad as it was tedious and boring. When I walked in they told me to front and face everything in the store. I was okay with that even though it was the only thing they ever ask me to do but of course while I was out on the floor I had so many people asking me things - can you get me crickets? where can i get feeder mice? can you assist me with the birds? what's the difference between the blue bag and the green bag of natural choice dog food? - I couldn't help any of these people and it was so frustrating.
Finally I was at the cash register and Dawn came up to me - 'how are you doing' 'I'm so overwhelmed I feel like I don't know anything' - I didn't even realize it but I was about to start crying and I think she sensed it too. 'What have they taught you?' 'How to front and face and I had Jerry teach me the register'.
I asked Megan to teach me how to do crickets for people and taught myself some aquatics. If I didn't take the initiative I wouldn't know anything. So to add to it all, I front and face for three hours - until there was absolutely not a single thing out of place. At 6:30 I asked Ray what I could do - 'Umm why don't you start in small animals and front and face all the way up to...' I didn't even let him finish, I just walked away.
We closed the store at 7 to do inventory. I was excited to know that even though I wasn't getting a break, I could grab a slice of pizza before I started. Dawn and James took me back into this room across from the bathrooms with a table, vending machines, a tv, and brightly painted walls. 'What is this? I haven't been in here before.' They both exchanged jaw-dropped looks: 'Sam - are you serious? This is the break room, why the hell hasn't anyone showed you anything?'
I understand now why Petco's quitting rate is so high. If I wasn't such an easy-going person I would be out of there - they give you no direction. They throw you out on the floor to basically learn for yourself. It's somewhat intimidating during the weekend when it's crowded.
Anyway - it's 11:40 now. I'm off work. Tomorrow I have class from 10:00-1:45 then work from 3:00-10:00 and Tuesday I have class from 9:30-1:45 and work 2:30-10:00. I'm missing the Invisible Children screening which has me really upset. I tried to do a lot to help out advertising for the event. I hope all of our chalk is still there tomorrow. I don't think it's rained since Friday afternoon. I can't wait to hear about the turnout from Shu.
I have to wake up at 8:30 to shower. I would tonight but I'm just too tired to wait for my hair to dry before going to bed. I probably won't have much time to write between now and the Bahamas Wednesday morning so don't be surprised if there are no entries until then.
-- ♥
Say you'll love me, love me forever
Never stop - not for whatever
Near and far and always
And everywhere and everything
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