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[25 Sep 2005|08:13am] |
"Well it's good your drunk"
"Why?
"Because I'd never get you to talk if you were sober..."
hahah last night was bad. So many random things keep coming back to my mind. I sat under a pine tree last night for 20 minutes in some random neighbors lawn. I re-made friends with Wilhour, sitting in the grass and shes telling me how she's sorry for telling those things to Bryce? hahah I dont even care anymore, I was like uh dude its ok...
It's funny, it never came to my mind that I should turn aruond when i was crossing the lawn and heard somone scream Samantha. "Shit Sam, thats Max" "Oh hey, well lets just keep walking"
We hung out with Smetona again... I'm starting to think he doesnt have alot of friends but it's chill, he's actually a really good person. Last night, it made me realize so much more, and made me so upset. I was outside and Brian came out "Sam, are you alright?" I kind of just collapsed and he picked me up and was like "hey its okay, just walk back into the basement and sit down"... he stuck by me, like a friend should. And all those times, Bobby would always, always takl about how awful of a persno Smetona was bc he said Smetona took advantage of his cousin while she was drunk. And he always denied it and I just listened to Bobby... God, I've passed judgement on so many people that didn't deserve it. Which now, only makes me feel more like shit.
And last night, I never came to think I could trust Brian, because I've learned that you can't trust anybody, or atleast I cant, but I wasn't worried either. Someone text me asking me what I was doing last night and I replied not knowing who ti was saying Paul Paetos party... then I got a text back from "Boob Cell" and wanted to throw my phone. I gave it to Emily bc I didnt want to even respond once I realized who it was.
I brought alot of things upon myself last night:
"Sam, why did you call my brother?"
"Hey, Hey I'm a deer"
"This isn't holly would"
oh and the quite humerous way me and Max began talking
*Max is waiting to use the bathroom and starts pounding on the door*
In a real sarcastic tone: "Usuaully when the doors locked, that means someones inside" "oh is that so? well come here lets talk" "no i dont want to talk to you" "yes you do" "fine, whatever, lets just talk"
what a night.
I need to go change for CCD teaching.
Later loves. ♥
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[25 Sep 2005|12:33pm] |
Ohh, when I'm around you I'm predictable
Goodness, I get why I love the color green so much.
I'm such a jealous person.
"omg Emily I have to tell you, I'm obsessed with your brother"
I just wanted to leave baglemeister.
We went to breakfast with Paul Paeto this morning.
Talked about Glenns magical adventures.
I don't know. I'm so frustrated with life.
I sit here and tell myself people need to go about doing things differently.
I need to do things differetly myself, or so it seems.
I'm never going to get through.
I need to clean out my car. It's awful.
later loves. ♥
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[25 Sep 2005|04:39pm] |
It's funny, the build up and the ending factor that cause a break down.
I made an ass out of myself on the phone with Dan last night. I dont even remember what I said. Max and I talked for the first time since god knows when, June I suppose. I finally got my computer back with all my old poetry. My father deleted my collese essay and resume. Emily isn't answering her phone. Everythings just gone down hill... and then I call Merrick to see where he wants to meet bc we decided we were going to hang out and his mom tells me he just left with Alex Felts...
Hah I really dont think today could getttt much worse.
later loves. ♥
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"You havent changed a bit"
*holding up a beer* "oh, I have"
"that doesnt mean you've changed"
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