| 10:26am 05/03/2004 | ||||
well it feels like i have been broken for a lifetime and i cant ahhh i am going insane... i want to die and i havent felt that way truly in awhile and i cant deal right now a lot of things came into perspective last nite... and i dont know about shit anymore... am i coming or going... i feel i have been up for a good lil minute and i am coming down from this high... why do guys flock me and why do people say i love you? what do those words really mean? i dont know you and here you are saying i love you??? why? there is a guy that wants to be with me but he doesnt know me and he wants to say i lov you but why? can i please be me alone? i made it this far and i am going to continue without someone until bren is ready or until my heart heals... JEWEL LYRICS "I'm Sensitive" I was thinking that I might fly today Just to disprove all the things you say It doesn't take a talent to be mean Your words can crush things that are unseen So please be careful with me, I'm sensitive And I'd like to stay that way. You always tell me that is impossible To be respected and be a girl Why's it gotta be so complicated? Why you gotta tell me if I'm hated? So please be careful with me, I'm sensitive And I'd like to stay that way. I was thinking that it might do some good If we robbed the cynics and took all their food That way what they believe will have taken place And we can give it to people who have some faith So please be careful with me, I'm sensitive And I'd like to stay that way. I have this theory that if we're told we're bad Then that's the only idea we'll ever have But maybe if we are surrounded in beauty Someday we will become what we see 'Cause anyone can start a conflict it's harder yet to disregard it I'd rather see the world from another angle We are everyday angels Be careful with me 'cause I'd like to stay that way **************************************** beautiful, but fragile and i like to stay that way for awhile... **************************************** JEWEL LYRICS "Don't" Don't walk too close Don't breathe so soft Don't talk so sweet Don't sing Don't lay oh so near Please don't let me fall in love with you again Please let me forget all those sweet smiles all of the passion all of the peace, the heat, the pain all those blue skies where your words were my freedom Please, don't let me fall in love with you again Too many times I've cared too much I stood on the edge and say that you held my hand and knowing too well I couldn't hide from those eyes Please, don't let me fall in love with you again hmmm i guess it hurts to much too think... and it hurts too love anyone else i want to crawl in a hole and give up on the sunlight and all it holds for me in the future... i want to be free from a life of suffering and pain... reincarnate me as a rock that sits on a bank of a stream and i will be free!!!! *ever read lyrics and u know what it means? Stellar Meet me in outer space WE could spend the night Watch the earth come up I've grown tired of that place Won't you come with me? WE could start again How do you do it? Make me feel like I do How do you do it? It's better than I ever knew Meet me in outer space I will hold you close If you're afraid of heights I need you to see this place It might be the only way That I can show you how It feels to be inside of you How do you do it? Make me feel like I do How do you do it? It's better than I ever knew You are stellar I Miss You To see you when I wake up Is a gift I didn't think could be real To know that you feel the same as I do Is a three-fold utopian dream You do something to me that I can't explain So would I be out of line if I said I miss you? I see your picture I smell your skin on the empty pillow next to mine You have only been gone ten days But already I'm wasting away I know I'll see you again Whether far or soon But I need you to know that I care And I miss you man i can explain no more... |
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blank| bucking the system | ||||
| 02:09pm 04/03/2004 | ||||
The Medication Is Wearing Off by Eels Album : electroshock blues see this watch she gave me? well it still ticks away the days I'm climbing back for me the medication's wearing off gonna hurt not a little, a lot keep on tickin' you're not lickin' me step on a crack break your mother's heart red light green light black suicide e-mail do not delete plug it back in the jack start to be what they want you to be and you see yourself as they see you sunsrise at the corner of sunset and alvarado I think what the hell do I do now watch the day disintegrate so I can stay up late and wait see this watch she gave me? well it still ticks away i hope there is no more pain in this world! i wish i could say something to make you realize bren!!! P.S. You Rock My World by Eels Album : electroshock blues I was at a funeral the day I realised I wanted to spend my life with you Sitting down on the steps at the old post office The flag was flying at half-mast And I was thinkin' 'bout how everyone is dying And maybe its time to live I don't know, where we're going I don't know what we'll do Walked into the Thrif-tee Saw a man with the hollow eyes who didn't give me all my change But it didn't bother me this time 'cause I know I've only got this moment And it's good I went to the gas station Old woman honked her horn Waiting for me to fix her car I don't know, where we're going I don't know what we'll do Laying in bed tonight Im was thinking and listening to all the dogs and the sirens and the shots And how a careful man tries to dodge the bullets While a happy man takes a walk And maybe it's time to live! |
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numb| something has to give away from this insanity... | ||||
| 11:27am 04/03/2004 | ||||
 You are one of the few out there whose wings are truly ANGELIC. Selfless, powerful, and divine, you are one blessed with a certain cosmic grace. You are unequalled in peacefulness, love, and beauty. As a Being of Light your wings are massive and a soft white or silver. Countless feathers grace them and radiate the light within you for all the world to see. You are a defender, protector, and caretaker. Comforter of the weak and forgiver of the wrong, chances are you are taken advantage of once in awhile, maybe quite often. But your innocence and wisdom sees the good in everyone and so this mistreatment does not make you colder. Merciful to the extreme, you will try to help misguided souls find themselves and peace. However not all Angelics allow themselves to be gotten the better of - the Seraphim for example will be driven to fighting for the sake of Justice and protection of those less powerful. Congratulations - and don't ever change - the world needs more people like you. *~*~*Claim Your Wings - Pics and Long Answers*~*~* brought to you by Quizilla  Dark shadow. Something has drawn you into darkness in the past, and you're now trying to get out of it. The darkness is already inside you, and getting it out will be hard, but if you try, maybe one day you can be who you want to be again. Don't give in!!!
 You are Furry Cuffs!If there were an "extra vanilla flavor", that would be you. So you're a bit on the conservative side, sexually. Maybe you're a bit new to the game - or a bit shy. Either way, furry cuffs are the perfect way to spice things up a little. What Kind of Handcuffs Are You? More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva  in my eyes you have lost someone you love or wish you loved. i think youll find the right person one day. good luck. (rate?) in my eyes you are...(pics and different outcomes) brought to you by Quizilla  How stuck in the past are you??  You sing AND play! Wow, you are a multitalented wonder. You write your own music and then write your own lyrics. You cut down band members and add to stage performance. It's hard to do what you do, so be proud of it. What should you play in a band? brought to you by Quizilla You are the Prohibition era...you are rebellious and want to cast off the shackles of authority in favour of a good time and a tidy profit. You are opportunistic, showy and able to deal with hardship as long as you don't immerse all your problems in liquor. ****** What Time Period are You? ****** brought to you by Quizilla You're one of the great comic heroines, such as Portia, Rosaline or Beatrice. You're more than a match for any man, with an amazing wit and an independent spirit. You are also exceedingly brave and love to trangress the conventions of society. You yearn for freedom from censorship. What Shakespearean Character Are You? (female) brought to you by Quizilla  Your classic beauty icon is Katherine Hepburn, a movie star known for her independent spirit and intellect. Katherine wore pants before they were in fashion for women and took challenging roles on screen rather than simply playing the ingenue. Her make-up was minimal and her style was crisp, clean and functional, showcasing her talents and her determined personality. Who is your Classic Beauty Icon? brought to you by Quizilla  Who's your inner rockstar? |
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confused
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| 10:37am 03/03/2004 | ||||
 Heart of Crystal What is Your Heart REALLY Made of? brought to you by Quizilla  Which Family Guy character are you? |
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crazy| toeknee!!! | ||||
| 12:13pm 02/03/2004 | ||||
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cranky| i feel lost and i cant hold on!!!!!!!! | ||||
| 11:38am 01/03/2004 | ||||
I can't make you love me Turn down the lights, turn down the bed Turn down these voices inside my head Lay down with me, tell me no lies Just hold me close, don't patronize (don't patronize me) Cause I can't make you love me if you don't You can't make your heart feel something it won't Here in the dark, in these lonely hours I will lay down my heart and I'll feel the power But you won't, no, you won't Cause I can't make you love me if you don't I'll close my eyes, then I won't see The love you don't feel when you're holding me Morning will come and I'll do what's right Just give me till then to give up this fight (and I will give up this fight) Cause I can't make you love me if you don't You can't make your heart feel something it won't Here in the dark, in these lonely hours I will lay down my heart and I'll feel the power But you won't, no, you won't Cause I can't make you love me if you don't... he had never heard me sing until i sang this song and knowing this i intentionally hurt him and sang this song to make him walk away from the group the other day... *everything i love is gone from my life and sanity is wearing thin the littlest thing is driving me insane i dont want to talk to him but my heart yearns to be near him and i dont know why everyone says dont hold on ur better off but why they dont know his dreams like i do and they dont know who he really is: Underneath Your Clothes shakira You're a song Written by The hands of God Don't get me wrong This might sound To you a bit odd But you're the place Where all my thoughts Go hiding Right under your clothes Is where I'll find them Underneath your clothes There's an endless story There's the man I chose There's my territory And of all the things I deserve For being such A good girl honey Because of you I forgot the Smart ways to rhyme Because of you I'm running out of Reasons to cry When the friends are gone When the party's over We'll still belong To each other Underneath your clothes There's an endless story There's the man I chose There's my territory And of all the things I deserve For being such A good girl honey hell who has the answers for me? on the lighter side of things i had one big drunken weekend and got my eyebrow pierced... it didnt hurt... |
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| will the shit get better? | ||||
| 09:46am 27/02/2004 | ||||
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| i want him back | ||||
| 09:34am 25/02/2004 | ||||
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| i feel blah!!! | ||||
| 08:32am 25/02/2004 | ||||
--- HEY THAT IS MY NAME I AINT A TOMBOY AM I?
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| the way i feel... | |||
| 10:04am 24/02/2004 | |||
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"Angry All The Time" Tim McGraw Here we are What is left of a husband and a wife four good kids Who have a way of gettin on with their lives I'm not old but I'm getting a whole lot older every day It's too late to keep from goin' crazy I got to get away The reasons that I can't stay don't have a thing to do with being in love And I understand that lovin a man shouldn't have to be this rough You ain't the only one Who feels like this world left you far behind I don't know why you gotta be Angry All The Time Our boys are strong the spittin image of you when you were young I hope someday they can see past what you have become I remember every time I said I'd never leave What I can't live with is memories of the way you used to be The reasons that I can't stay don't have a thing to do with being in love And I understand that lovin a man shouldn't have to be this rough You ain't the only one Who feels like this world left you far behind I don't know why you gotta be Angry All The Time Twenty years have came and went since I walked out of your door I never quite made it back to the one I was before And God it hurts me to think of you For the light in your eyes was gone sometimes I don't know why this old world can't leave well enough alone The reasons that I can't stay don't have a thing to do with being in love And I understand that lovin a man shouldn't have to be this rough You ain't the only one Who feels like this world left you far behind I don't know why you gotta be Angry All The Time *this song symbolizes me!!! in so many words i am angry all the time....... |
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| i cant change u all i can do is love u? | ||||
| 09:42am 24/02/2004 | ||||
"Cold Day In July" Dixie Chicks... The moon is full my arms are empty All night long I've pleaded and cried You always said the day that you would leave me Would be a cold day in July Your bags are packed not a word is spoken I guess we said everything with good-bye Time moves so slow and promises get broken On this cold day in July Sun's coming up coming up down on Main Street Children shout as they're running out to play Head in my hands here I am Standing in my bare feet Watching you drive away Watching you drive away You said that we were gonna last forever You said our love would never die It looks like spring and It feels like sunny weather But it's a cold day in July Sun's coming up coming up down on Main Street Children shout as they're running out to play Head in my hands here I am Standing in my bare feet Watching you drive away Watching you drive away The moon is full my arms are empty All night long how I've pleaded and cried You always said the day that you would leave me Would be a cold day in July Here comes that cold day in July *our year would of been july 5th* the email i wrote to him... i wish it could be different i wish i wasnt so stupid... but hey i guess that is the way love goes and if you wanted the weed over me, you could of said something. but hey i cant change you and the love we shared i guess no matter what wasnt as strong as i believed in my heart. you know as well as i know i would never have let go no matter what the consequences would have been and you know as well as i know that time wont change a thing... but maybe that is only for me... you are beautiful in all angles and you will make someone i hope happy one day... i love you and i always will bren... it propaly wasnt the right time and it wasnt the right moment for you and i hope you are happy with the life you lead... maybe one day we can be friends but not now... yesterday i didnt lose just a lover i lost my best friend the one even though you didnt know all my secrets knew a great amount and one day i hope you realize what you mean to me... in every way that you had always... my heart of course is broken and there is a great portion of my soul missing that was you... i wish that every word i ever said that was foul i could change, i wish that i wouldnt have let my heart be filled with the joys that you did bring to me... i cant talk to you in person for i may shed tears and i cant even look because i imaged us together a lot longer than we were... see before you i gave up on love and i knew in my heart that if i ever feel again it would be harder than the time before. i guess that is where i fucked up i guess that is my greatest fall... i still have the first pic of us when we were together and i still can remember that whole day and how happy you have made me... from the first bus trip to columbus, to that time in the rec, t even the last time we kissed, i cant change how i have acted but i can only learn from the mistakes... you are the biggest part of my heart and you are the last hug of thenite still in my mind... time they say heals the wounded heart, but salt stings and that is all i have done is cried... maybe i am not the prettiest girl on the outside and that was never good enough for you, maybe i had a bad attitude, or maybe i was too grumpy but there is so much left unsaid, i dont know why i wasnt good enough for you... i love you forever... charlene Mary Lou Lord "Western Union Desperate" Felt a little uneasy on easy street Out of place and incomplete call it guilt Call it what you will Kissed good-bye the summer sky Hollywood and Malibu tides Through thick and thin you got a Good friend in me Just give me a beer and give me a bed Chase the demons out of my head Play me a song and sing me to sleep And meet me in the middle of my dreams Well I've seen the sun rise from the cliffs at Point Reyes And I've see it set upon Thunder Bay But I always keep my compass set on you When the night comes in and the stars come out The highway lines start to wear me out It'll be ok cause I'm coming back home to you And distant salutations and silly souvenirs Can't help your twilight loneliness Or brush away your tears I'll wire you some love today There's so much more I want to say But I'm Western Union desperate In a pay phone in the rain And it's so insane I'm Rimbaud and you're Verlaine So hey! California here I come I got my old backpack and a sunburnt thumb I hope my compass is tried and ture 'Cause when I need a friend it's still you (Mary Lou Lord) ---------------------------------------- |
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| 12:39pm 19/02/2004 | |||
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| 09:47am 19/02/2004 | ||||
Written by Martine Theeuwen, Christophe Chantzis and Erik Vanspauwen Do you ever question your life Do you ever wonder why Do you ever see in your dreams All the castles in the sky Oh tell me why Do we build castles in the sky Oh tell me why All the castles way up high Please tell me why Do we build castles in the sky Oh tell me why All the castles way up high Do you ever question your life Do you ever wonder why Do you ever see in your dreams All the castles in the sky Oh tell me why Do we build castles in the sky Oh tell me why All the castles way up high Please tell me why Do we build castles in the sky Oh tell me why All the castles way up high ~~ with this pass week i have questioned every last bit of sanity i have... i wonder if it is the same as it was... u know there are times i wonder what is everything for and there are times if i wonder will the pain go away... everything i love gets taking away, i want to know is there anything worth loving anymore? u see we put our time into something to make it strong and to watch it grow what happens when that lil bit of love goes away? where do we stand? peeps say if it doesnt kill u it only makes u stronger what if u already are strong? i love him and it took me losing him to realize how much i loved him and want to be with him... i dont know anymore about any damn thing, concerning love and all the wonderment it holds... why do we let someone give us dreams and we build castles in the sky with them? |
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| i remember when this song still meant something to me... i remember when u use to mean the same... | |||
| 03:12pm 10/02/2004 | |||
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i'm so tired of being here suppressed by all of my childish fears and if you have to leave i wish that you would just leave your presence still lingers here and it won't leave me alone these wounds won't seem to heal this pain is just too real there's just too much that time cannot erase when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears and i've held your hand through all of these years but you still have all of me you used to captivate me by your resonating light but now i'm bound by the life you left behind your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams your voice it chased away all the sanity in me these wounds won't seem to heal this pain is just too real there's just too much that time cannot erase when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears and i've held your hand through all of these years but you still have all of me i've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone but though you're still with me i've been alone all along will time ever heal these wounds that engulf my heart??? |
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| what happens to an empty heart??? | ||||
| 03:02pm 10/02/2004 | ||||
Haunted Ba da pa pa ba da pa pa... Come here Pretty please Can you tell me where I am You won't you say something I need to get my bearings I'm lost And the shadows keep on changing And I'm haunted By the lives that I have loved And actions I have hated I'm haunted By the lives that wove the web Inside my haunted head Ba da pa pa ba da pa pa... Don't cry, There's always a way Here in November in this house of leaves We'll pray Please, I know it's hard to believe To see a perfect forest Through so many splintered trees You and me And these shadows keep on changing And I'm haunted By the lives that I have loved And actions I have hated I'm haunted By the promises I've made And others I have broken I'm haunted By the lives that wove the web Inside my haunted head Hallways... always I'll always love you I'll always need you I'll always want you And I will always miss you Ba da pa pa ba da pa pa... Come here No I won't say please One more look at the ghost Before I'm gonna make it leave Come here I've got the pieces here Time to gather up the splinters Build a casket for my tears I'm haunted (By the lives that I have loved) I'm haunted (By the promises I've made) I'm haunted By the hallways in this tiny room The echos there of me and you The voices that are carrying this tune Ba da pa pa... Father : What is it Annie? Daughter : You think I'll cry? I won't cry! My heart will break before I cry! I will go mad. day after day there is something that holds me back from being the true free spirit that i have always been and i cant explain this new revalation in my life... in my soul? does brendon still make me happy? i dont know i know that i am looking and looking for what is the next question???? where do i turn in times like this??? i guess it is just u amnd me journal... |
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| stalker tendencies... | ||||
| 12:56pm 09/02/2004 | ||||
 Legolas Please rate my quiz I worked hard on it thanks Which Lord of the Rings person do you want? (many out comes for anyone plus pics to) brought to you by Quizilla  lord of the rings !!**_WHAT_MOVIE_R_U_FROM_**!!with Pics brought to you by Quizilla  Your man (or rather elf) is Prince Legolas (The rating takes place below) The last 'WHICH LOTR GUY IS FOR YOU?' quiz you'll ever have to take - and you won't be able to pick your outcome! brought to you by Quizilla  Nemesis ?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ?? brought to you by Quizilla |
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calm| i love this movie... | ||||
| 11:18am 09/02/2004 | ||||
 Pre-Hyptnotized Peter What Office Space character are you? brought to you by Quizilla the main character reminds me of the first real love in my life alex... hmmm somethings will never be meant to be...  Satine What Moulin Rouge Character Are You? brought to you by Quizilla ewan mcgregor... mmm that is all i can say that English Accent...  Hazel Eyes What Color Eyes Should You Have? brought to you by Quizilla  Love. You Truly Desire Love. You long for someone to hold you and take the pain away. You haven't been in much relationships or you need to work on how to handle them. You always seem lost in a daydream about the person you care about most. PLEASE RATE My inner child is sixteen years old!
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| 09:24am 02/02/2004 | |||||
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| just another day in the neighborhood... won't u be my neighbor? | ||||
| 10:32am 22/01/2004 | ||||
To link it (the actual code):   http://www.liquidgeneration.com/quiz/ima To link it (the actual code):  i said it before and i say it again i am molly ringwald... |
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| life is always changing including love!!! | ||||
| 09:36am 20/01/2004 | ||||
i feel trapped and depressed and i guess it is crazy!!! i am just ahhh... i keep listening to this song... it is almost calming... i am thinking about the last 5 years of my life... it is just crazyness... wednesday will mark 5 years MELISSA has been dead and the thought still haunts me i will grow old and she will always be young and beautiful, for the rest of eternity... well let me skidadle to class... |
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lilmxedupgirlie |
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Friends Info Calendar fake reality |
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