Still my favorite photographers. I can't find too many samples on the web of the ParkeHarrison's work from 2006, though. Anyone up for a trip to Holy Cross in Worcester?

Seems appropriate for the Lenten season...

The other day, I was standing at the bus stop outside Tufts University. I was waiting to go downtown and trying not to slip on all the ice on the sidewalk. Two women about my age were walking on the other side of the street on what appeared to be a much less treachurous sidewalk. They were talking loudly, so the climax of the conversation was clearly audible: "Didn't you used to think, when you were a teenager, that you'd be married at 25?"

Later, on the bus, it occured to me that I was 25. And that when I was a teenager, I did expect to be married at this age. (Where did this expectation come from back then?) Now I think that that expectation is absurd. You gotta give yourself enough time to grow up.

When I was talking with friends a year or so ago about the possibility of going to grad school for philosophy, several friends or friends of friends suggested that my marriage potential would plummet with such a move. At first I assumed that this was just practicality: family life and grad studies would be require more than full-time attention. But maybe there's something more behind this assertion. I don't know.

I've always felt like I've had to choose. That if I tried to go after both, one of them (kids or academic career) would be swallowed up by the other. Realistically speaking, one only has so much time and energy to lavish.

A female philosophy grad student at Harvard pointed out to me that there are men in such programs with families, but no women with kids (can't remember if any were even married). As she spoke about this, though, her boyfriend was adoringly at her side and obviously undaunted by her academic pursuits.

From "The Romantic Life of Brainiacs". A la the Boston Globe.

From this month's "Sunbeams" (the quotation page) of The Sun:

"Love...is the extremely difficult realization that something other than oneself is real." --Iris Murdoch

Feel better soon, Charity!

We made lots of quotes in the ER...

"This is how A students go to the ER!"
--Charity, when Jane preparedly whips out a fully packed lunchbox and we three eat together in the little room number 10

"I don't need a doctor; I already have lawyer! He can sue them if they screw up."
--Charity, jokingly considering how there is no point in checking out the ER docs to pass the time

One thing I realized yesterday is how "our guys" take such good care of us. Us ladies have supported and helped each other in different ways in desperate situations these past few years, but our boyfriends were impressive yesterday, calling and seeing how Charity was doing, offering rides, etc. (Char decided not to call her guy until he was done work so that he wouldn't be running around panicked in his New York office, unable to do anything to help.)

A big part of being independent is admitting trustworthy people into your life. Slightly ironic. Independence doesn't exclude interdependence or imply a loner lifestyle.

From this blog.

Got this link from a colleague. Some of these don't apply to me, obviously, since I'm female, but it's really funny if you're a designer. I don't want to ever see you use Comic Sans, okay? Or That Other Font that I can't even name. Blech.

23 Signs That You're Becoming a Design Geek

Posted Tuesday, 6 February 2007 by Sverre Sjøthun in Design, Entertainment

The world of design can be a ruthless one; not only do you spend most of your time pondering and tweaking minute details that most people find insignificant – and most likely won't even notice – you also get lured into developing anti-social habits like font-spotting and source-code peeping.
Geek

Learn to spot the warning signs in time
– you know you're becoming a design geek when:

1. You giggle whenever you use the colors F0CCED, EFF0FF and 44DDDD
2. You’re in the sun and you look around for a Drop Shadow to sit under.
3. You give your relatives a lecture about color spaces and profiles when you email them your vacation photos.
4. Seing someone use Lens Flare or Comic Sans adversely affects your blood-pressure
5. You maintain a grid system for your refrigerator magnets.
6. You organise your CD collection according to the Pantone chart.
7. You sit at work for eight hours straight just looking at your monitor, waiting for a spark of inspiration that doesn't come.
8. You're up 'til 5am because you came up with the best idea ever while brushing your teeth.
9. The hottest dream you ever had was "Trace contour... Find Edges... Pinch... Extrude... Smudge Stick... Motion Blur.... Sprayed Strokes..."
10. You know Lorem Ipsum by heart.
11. Your kid knows Lorem Ipsum by heart.
12. The preschool teacher complains your child won't color inside or outside the lines – only indicate colors on a separate sheet.
13. Activating your entire font collection makes your computer crash – and you're running OSX.
14. You deliberately butcher your perfectly cross browser compatible site in IE by placing a “Too Cool for IE” banner on it.
15. You prefer a Layer Style of 50% Opacity (or less) on your wife’s Satin.
16. You spend $200 on a font for your personal website because "it's the only one where the lower-case g is just right..."
17. Looking at a menu make you go "hmmm, ITC Baskerville italic" rather than "mmmm, lunch!"
18. And when you finally order, you go for Layer Based Slices with Grain Texture...
19. You use words about fonts you dislike that other normal people reserve for fascist dictators and serial killers.
20. Apple+Z is the first thing that goes through your mind if you drop and break something.
21. You refer to colleagues as Strict, Transitional, Loose and the Future Unemployed.
22. You refer to your privates as "the Magic Wand".
23. You actually understand this post and pass it on to your friends.

"For, [Moses, after God had "commanded him to stay and put off his shoes") having taken off the shoes of his desires and pleasures, he became very conscious of his wretchedness in the sight of God, as befitted one about to hear the word of God. When so likewise the preparation which God granted to Job in order that he might speak with Him consisted not in those delights and glories which Job himself reports that he was wont to have in his God, but in leaving him naked upon a dung-hill, abandoned and even persecuted by his friends, filled with anguish and bitterness, and the earth covered with worms. And then the Most High God, He that lifts up the poor man from the dung-hill, was pleased to come down and speak with him there face to face, revealing to him the depths and heights of His wisdom, in a way that He had never done in the time of his prosperity."
--St. John of the Cross, Dark Night of the Soul

As all of my friends these days know, I am on a quest to GET YOU ALL TESTED FOR CELIAC DISEASE!

It is suspected that 1 in 133 Americans has it. (I have it and went far too long before a diagnosis was reached.) It's genetic and yes, it can kill you eventually or give you something that can kill you if you don't treat it, so it's worth knowing about.

I say: Go get the blood test if at least a few of these describe you:
1. You have got shingles before age 25. (Or you have other signs of a whacked out immune systyem.)
2. You have various psychological problems.
3. You have low blood sugar or have to eat frequently to keep from feeling weak and dizzy.
4. Your skin gets dry and itchy for no apparent reason.
5. You've experienced a season of unexplained chest pain and/or heat palpitations.
6. You feel awful a lot, but your doc says it must be just stress.

Maybe those are related to Celiac, but maybe not. I'm no expert; I like to speculate about trends. Not everyone has gastro-symtoms. Heck, my doc thought I had a deadly heart arrythmia for awhile. (Maybe I did, but it seemed to be related to the Celiac flare-up before I was gluten-free.) But anyway: it's common, and now there is a simple blood test which they actually use to test all the kids in come countries like Italy...but not the USA.

This really gets me. Have you ever had this realization?

Try to think of the wisest human beings that ever lived. The two that pop into my head first are Jesus and Socrates. (I don't consider Jesus to be cheating since he was divine; he also had a fully human nature, same as us.)

Okay, what do you want from the wisest people who ever lived? I mean, if you were told that you would be the wisest person of the century, what would you do? You might be tempted to quit your day job, hole up in your house, and write as many excellent books as you can produce. That's how one passes on wisdom to future generations, right?

Apparently not. Guess who never wrote a book...Jesus, or Socrates. Was Mother Teresa prolific? Did Solomon fill up a library as his bequeathal to humanity? No....

Isn't that strange?? Isn't that unexpected?

Maybe not. I mean, if you are the wisest person in the world, maybe you know that books are good, but that there is something better. (Isn't the author greater than his work?) Jesus and Socrates walked around and talked with (read: frequently bugged) the normal folks on the street all day long. They also spent a lot of time with bumbling disciples (who wrote a lot of stuff down). Note: Even Kierkegaard, who wrote like it was going out of style, "wasted" a lot of time bugging people in the streets about their lives.

I guess the wisest people influenced the world through other people, directly. Sure, we treasure their words. But we're transformed by their lives (and deaths), which give give these words their punch.

Today, the Word will come to us, like at Christmas, in our everyday life. We might be accosted by Christ on the street or in our office or on the subway right after some stranger sneezes in our face again and we were just thinking about how we want to return that pink sweater that we bought yesterday to Old Navy.

"If there is a God, miracles are possible" (Kreeft, Tacelli). (A philosophical statement, but also a daily reality.) That's why I get up out of bed every morning.

I'm taking a chunk of the morning to organize my activities for the coming months. There has been so much to think about lately that my mind keeps churning bits of it up like an angry sea--even when I'm asleep! (In fact, taking the time to write this has been wise , but I realize that other things may not get done today as a result.)

Money budgeting is something that I do often and feel confident doing. Time budgeting, however, needs to be just as realistic. This is my attempt to enjoy the sea and get my boat in ship shape for navigating it.

-----

TIME BUDGETING in JAN 2007

WORK...
1. Continuing to learn new position.
2. Regular duties and annual projects.
3. Training new assistant.
4. Commuting.
5. Annual report (will require extra hrs at office).
6. Making sure shopping, dry cleaning, ironing, etc. is done for work.
7. Meetings with colleagues.

VOLUNTEER...
1. Capital Campaign print and web teams. Some overlap w/work.
2. Soli Deo Gloria initiatives, Illume, and participation. No weekly meetings for now.

PHILOSOPHY & ART...
1. Reading, writing, and reflecting (incl. blogging). Painting series to begin this Spring.
2. Logic class this semester at Harvard Ext. School.

OTHER...
1. Investing in boyfriend, friends, roommates, family, and whomever. Making new connections.
2. GF baking/cooking and nutrition. Doctor and specialist appt's. Weight gain priority. Good health!
3. Weekly Bible study and some random activities w/the girls. Um, Christianly disciplines in general maybe.
4. Taking the T and bus everywhere. (45 to 1.5 hrs. to go downtown)
5. Living plans for Aug 1st, which will likely include apt hunting for a studio on the T.
6. Keeping the house and my office space tidy.
7. Evaluating and making necessary changes: BEING DELIBERATE about life...and open to surprises.

-----

This still seems like too much, given the fact that I try to eat at least three meals a day and get 8 hrs of sleep. So I'll have to take this and prioritize some more...

I've discovered that it's extremely important to me to not be too scheduled. I like to know what to expect, but sometimes I need a spontaneous day where I can stay in PJs till noon, read a bit, and not have a list of things to do breathing down my back. Everyone has 24 hours each day to steward; there is no need to be a slave to busyness; no one has "no time available."

And the word of the year is...:
"truthiness"

Okay, so here's the deal. I need to write. I loved when I blogged every day as a student...

This blog is being resurrected.


REASONS WHY I BLOG:

1. It's a record of my life and thoughts that I can look back on. I can refind quotations and ideas that I keep here, or I can see how I've changed over time.

2. It's more fun (and free) than therapy. It allows me to process things, to step back, to blow off steam, to figure out decisions, whatever.

3. Interaction! We've had some good discussions in this blog and in others' blogs.

4. Free speech. I believe in it. People need to remember that they are human beings and not machines or shadows. When you blog...no one owns you. Because of the internet, anyone can publish.

5. Reporting. I think it's important for people to report their experiences. For one, it frequently inspires others. Also, it keeps folks--writer and subjects both--accountable. (The Devil Wears Prada, anyone?)

6. Details. There are lots of beautiful things and moments in life that can easily be overlooked. Blogging is a way to stop, look, and marvel.

7. Learning. Working out what I'm currently reading or reflecting on helps me to better understand it and to connect with others who offer helpful comments.

8. Keeping in touch. I've lived in quite a few different places now, and so have my long-time friends. Blogs are great for life updates.

9. Blogging gets the creative juices going and the reflection revved, which frequently leads to longer pieces of writing.


RULES OF THE ROAD

1. Most every post will be open to the public. Anything that I deem inappropriate for the public will be "friends only."

2. As always, anonymous posting is prohibited. In fact, all anonymous posts are screened, so I'll probably never even get them. This rule just makes sense considering: (1) If the person is not willing to put their name behind their words, why waste time reading those words? (2) You never know if the poster was a ten-year-old or pyscho or what. Again, waste of time, and possibly even dangerous (3) Anonymous posting encourages "flaming" and meaningless insults (i.e., waste of time).

3. Readers are encouraged to comment on the posts or others' comments.

4. It's my choice to write. And it's your choice to read. (If this blog makes you angry or miserable, then stop reading it.)

5. I only say things that I believe to be true. (I expect the same of you.)

Pizza topping for tonight:

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

The dream job is keeping me busy; so is life in general. But things are good! And I can afford to buy people Christmas gifts this year, which is nice (before I got gifts, but it cut dangerously close to my food budget)--to trot around town thinking of someone and looking for something that "matches" them...or to be reminded of them when you discover something that they'd like.

December has been full of Christmas festivities. We (roommates and Jeff) decorated the house, made sugar cookie cut-outs (including GF), went shopping, played and sang Christmas music, went to a party, and will take an unofficial tour of Somerville lights...and that's not to mention all of the Advent and Christmas things going on here at "work"!

I think it's time this weekend to curl up with some cocoa, light some candles, and just enjoy it all.

I have been unable to find *real* Christmas cards so far this year. I'd like to send cards out, but where in Boston can I buy one that has more than a picture of a snowman on the front and "Season's Greetings!" on the inside in red, scripty font?

The following article raised some interesting questions, including:
1. What is the changed "market demand" for Christmas cards telling us about changes in Western culture from its "Messiah days"?
2. Why are some values allowed to be expressed and some not allowed to be expressed in a supposedly open society?
3. What is the "first cause" of morality? Is it true that, "If God doesn't exist, everthing is permissible?" (according to one of Dostoevsky's characters). Is a culturally-determined morally inherently logically invalid? If so, why do there appear to be moral atheists? (Just read this question in a Kreeft book I'm into right now. I won't put my replies down, just wanted to list the questions raised for now.)

I am still herding cats for a living. Except now it's musicians and ministers instead of real estate agents...which is a lot more fun. Finally, I am not the biggest space cadet of the bunch.

How is this my life? Pretty neat.

I may have posted this before, but I really like it.

One of my pet peeves is busyness. I hate to be busy, as a rule. What's the rush? Is everything I'm doing that important? No. Few things are that important. There are seasons of busyness, true, but I am anti-busy as a lifestyle. I want to create r...o...o...m in my life for God and people, rest and reflection...and even "true work." True work is responding with your whole person...intelligence, emotions, skills, etc. You can't act whole when you are burning out your fuses.

The myth of work is thought to justify an existence that is essentially meaningless and futile. There is, then, a great deal of busyness as people invent things to do when in fact there is very little to be done. Yet we are overwhelmed with jobs, duties, tasks, assignments, "missions" of every kind.
--Thomas Merton, Conjectures of a Guilty Bystander

Why are folks so busy as a lifestyle? Here are some not-so-great reasons:

1. Meaning. Like the quotation above expresses. You work in order to feel like you are accomplishing something with your life (for yourself, God, the common good, whatever). Your sense of mission fuels a reckless abandonment to work. At first this seems admirable. But you are sometimes secretly harboring a secret misery, or get too burnt out to continue the work that you not only enjoy, but need. It's not admirable to work in order to be useful. The only thing necessary, Martha, is to listen and respond.

2. Avoidance. Sometimes when everything stops and one is alone, all those negatives catch up with the busy sprinter and wreak horrors on the mind. Work becomes the alcohol to numb life's pain. When you are busy working, you don't have to think about the other stuff you'd rather not think about. It creates a temporary sense of order when there is an ever-present, impending sense of disorder within you.

3. Validation. You want to be the very best at what you do. What's the point of being second best? You only have one life to live. Why not make your mark, go down in history, even if you don't get famous? You are the workaholic. You are busy because you are always striving for validation. You forget that being and doing are reciprocal for your development. You concentrate on doing...but what are you becoming? You are neglecting very important aspects of a human life. What is it to gain the whole world, but to lose your soul?

4. Vanity. You have an overinflated view of the importance of what you do. If you don't do it, it won't get done...and it MUST get done. And it must be good, which is why you take on too much, as a perfectionist. You are very reluctant to call off work when you're sick, and you always worry that someone will think you are slacking...because you want them to think you're as much of a saint as you unconsciously think you are. Are you playing God?

5. Culture. If you're an American, you live in a culture of busyness. If you are busy, that means you got something goin' on: a full social calendar and a good job. But this is "chasing after the wind." You think it makes you look like you have it all together if you are always on your cell phone or rushing off on some urgent business. No one is watching you that closely, though. You're not on center stage. Everything and everyone is calling out for your attention, and you start to fragment as you play the game.

6. Indecisive Pseudo-Martyrdom. You wake up one day and can't keep up with your life because you are SO BUSY! How did this happen? Well, you refused to make deliberate decisions along the way. You are quick to make commitments, but you always keep your commitments because you are a dedicated person...and don't want to be seen as a quitter. Everyone is always asking you to do something for them...good causes, all, and worthy of a good volunteer...and they praise you for being so willing to help. In fact, you kind of like to show off in this spotlight. You don't have time now to eat, sleep, or think properly. And the lack of thinking is leading you to take on even more. You don't remember that sometimes Jesus ran away from the crowds.

7. Hording. If you do well now, you'll be better off later. If you do more now, you'll be able to relax and enjoy life later. You do more now (and really really good), you will have a better future. You are pretty miserable today, but that's just because you're storing up for tomorrow. It's temporary, you say, but it continues on and on and on and becomes all you know. Please don't get hit by a bus, or your whole life plan won't work at all. You don't understand the concept of daily bread. You can only live in the present--not the future.

Any more to add???

Hi folks. This journal is no longer friends-only, except for writing that I would potentially attempt to publish, and snippets of my novel (I figure blogging will help me piece it out), and anything I deem too personal for public perusal.

BoLoco is opening up near my house. Life is good.

I'm excited that I get to design an annual report. I'm a nerd.

My job is cool!

FYI, the sr. minister uses a Mac. I have seen it myself! So, concerning the Mac vs PC debate: it is finished. Will you pretend that your judgment trumps that of G. by continuing to insist on your PC? Oh you hard of heart...

I have to use a PC at work, though. Doh. It and I are getting along well so far, though. No complaints.

I am NOT lactose intolerant. A long test confirmed this this morning. Not that I was planning on curtailing my dairy-product-consumption if the results turned up positive...

So I started the new job last Tuesday and trained the rest of the week.

I am here "on my own" this Monday. I think I need to make a schedule out for myself so I don't space out. There is a HUGE window in my office with a view to the Common! It's amazing (distracting? but should we refer to beauty as distracting?). This morning I took the Commuter Rail into the city from West Medford, which is much more relaxing than cramming into the sweltering subway.

We have devotions with all the ministers and staff on Wed. morning. This is my job? Interesting. Fun! I am so used to working in a secular/non-religious environment. I think this will be harder in some ways and a joy in others.

Must get to work! So much to do. I was quite exhausted and overwhelmed for much of last week, but I took a true "day of rest" yesterday and feel more refreshed now. Why do so many church employees and volunteers appear to be so burnt out? I'm determined not to go that route, so help me God ;-) Talk about the "Protestant work ethic"! There is a time for everything...a time to work hard, a time to relax...a time to bustle, and a time to be still...a time to be in the office and reachable, and a time to be outside with the cell phone off...a time to take stuff seriously, and a time to chillax...haha.

Well, I have a big decision to make, papers to fill out, an assistant to hire, an office to organize, and lots of things to figure out. Later, blogees.

---

P.S. Happy belated birthday toooooooo Jeffrey "Willaby" Williams W!