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Lhuv Kerapht

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postcards from those bears without bodies [23 Mar 2003|03:57am]
yeah, so ever since I was a little boy I've had this dream every now and then about a giant hedgemaze. It's always your ordinary, run of the mill hedgemaze, with high walls that are difficult to traverse, and everything is pretty normal for a little while. I just float through the leafy corridors, and try to make my way to the end.

Somewhere in the middle of the dream though, a very odd thing happens--or I should say--transpires. I begin to float above the maze, as if I've got no body, and as I look down, to my surprise, not to my horror, I see something incredible.


A number of bears with no bodies seem to be moving through the maze.


I say they have no bodies, although they are not simply disembodied bear-heads, because they are definitely walking, as if their bodies are invisible, or missing.


The bears continue on all through the night, and never seem to find their way out of the maze, they seem content just wandering and puzzling in the leaves and brambles.


such a strange dream....

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I don't want to die [17 Mar 2003|04:01am]
Okay, who wants to come with me tonight? I'm going out to the bar for the last time in a long time.

It's St. Patty's day, so I need to go drinking. It's only right.


maybe I'll get some punanny. I'll probably just end up alone at the end, bored and alone.


but I'll be drunk!


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want vs. need [14 Mar 2003|03:57am]
You can want someone with all of your heart, If you do you should tell them such.

the only thing they need to do then is think, "do I want you too?"


But if you NEED some one with every fibre of your being, you should never tell them.


If you do, that one may ask, "what can I get you to do for me?"


And no one wants that.....


If you have need of a full and happy relationship, and have never seen the other naked, or given them/gotten from them an orgasm, the words "need" and "you" should not be spoken in the same sentence.


Unless you're saying something like, "I need you to get me that cucumber out of the fridge," or "I need you to tell me what time I should come over."


But never, "I need you to complete me." ESPECIALLY IF YOU'RE IN HIGH SCHOOL. you are going to be incomplete for a long time, and if you claim a classmate of yours will "complete you," you need to think about how long the rest of your life is going to be.


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if not me, then another [12 Mar 2003|04:00am]
someone will kill them self(.....) today, and I hope it will not be me. I want to live, at the very least for another year,so that I will find out if I will move to OHIO, and for the chance to stick it to some first year chica.......

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kidnaped! [06 Mar 2003|03:55am]
I've got this friend, see, and a few days ago he was kidnaped while I was off at school. The bad guys took him away and left a message on my answering machine. something like, "We have your friend. We want one million dollars for his safe return, we want it tomorrow and no funny stuff. Good day."

I was horrified, and I did not know what to do, other than call the buddy I suspected had been kidnaped, to see if he was okay, or if it was a joke. He was home, thank goodness. It turns out in the time it took me to listen to that message, the kidnapers made friends with my buddy, and they made cookies together. So everything was okay in the end, and he was airlifted back to town in the kidnapers private helicopter (chopper). Those cookies were good. It turns out terrorists are good cooks.


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Venetian Snares [04 Mar 2003|04:00am]
"i'm just waiting to get you right inside my mouth."


say it aloud, slowly. enunciate each syllable, and try to give it an erotic ring.....give the phrase a rhythm, and make it a loop in your head.


I think it's fun to use as a mantra.


That comes from that Aaron Funk (venetian snares), who gets more and more fun to listen to every time I hear



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I've got a fang [02 Mar 2003|03:59am]
I am in Arizona right now, and I find myself thinking about class warfare. That should not be important, I need to concern myself with other things. Like OHIO and my visit to Antioch.

I think the most important thing I need to worry about as a prospective student at Antioch College will be how to comport myself so that the faculty and students who will ultimately decide on my admission will accept me. Do I ask many questions? Or do I ask enough for them to know that I am very interested in the school, and stop once they know my level of interest?


I think that if I do not endup dying between here and OHIO, I will be fine. OHIO will make me better, and I will feel fine after OHIO. OHIO will heal my hurts, and make me a better man.


I shall be okay after OHIO, and I will not be sad.


But I will still have a fang.


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Oh yes, the niceties of laziness [01 Mar 2003|03:59am]
I have been on spring break from school now for about 6 days.
I must say it has been the laziest week I have conducted in a very long time. I mean, most weeks have some EVENT or happening in them, but not this last week.


I haven't had to work or learn, or even talk to anyone at all if I did not want to. That is a nice thing. so relaxing. aaaaaahh.


oh, I am in my mother's home in Arizona, but it makes no difference. I am just as lazy here as I would be anywhere. she wanted to go and do things with me when I got here, but I told her,


"NO! I am on spring break! It is a time honored tradition for college students to divest themselves of responsibility for a couple weeks, and I fully intend to to so. I will not go with you to Wal-Mart. I don't like Wal-mart, and besides, I have the right to be lazy right now, so bog off."


oh, yes, and tomorrow I go to OHIO!!! woo!!


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carrie granite...can you imagine? [28 Feb 2003|03:58am]
Wilma Flintstone says
"wash day. If there's one thing I hate, it's doin' the laundry."


she is carrying an armful of Fred's clothing....and she approaches a pelican.


she dumps the clothes into the bird's mouth, adds powdered detergent, and walks away.


After he sloshes the stuff around a little while, the pelican then adds,


"If there's one thing she hates. she!"


Ahh, that's comedy.


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I can't draw pictures with letters. [27 Feb 2003|03:58am]
GRIN

that's what I am doing right now.


I am grinning because of SIX things:


2. Spring Break just started, and I don't have school or work for two whole weeks!


5. I have a plan. not a master plan, but sort of a slave plan.


1. My camera is not broken!! WOO!


7. I get to go to Arizona tomorrow! And then I get to go to OHIO!! I am more excited about OHIO (that's why it's in all caps).



/IN SUM/

I hope to get on the fast train to muli-millionaredom and superstardom before I kill myself. I think the reality will be somewhere in between, but all I want really is to fall in love and be happy.


Happiness. not dreary gothiness. I'm SO past that hating-myself-with-black-eyeliner-and-listening-to-autechre-because-I-want-to-die phase.


ALICE DEEJAY!!! I DON'T THINK I'M BETTER OFF ALONE!!!!


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O if I could only get some sleep [12 Feb 2003|03:56am]
I could not get to sleep last night, or the night before, and right now I am awake because I have ingested much and many ephedrine pills. I finally did get to sleep around 6am I think, and when I did, I got no rest, for I had to awake at 8am. I wish I did not have to go to college, but I remember what I have accomplished so far, without a degree, and say to myself, "you do not want to be stupid too much longer, do you?"

to which I answer, "No, of course not, I would kill myself or be deathly afraid of whatever I might do next if I were not in school right now."


I stop talking to myself then and try to fight the urge to run myself over, or get in a fistfight with myself, or (most often) keep myself from climbing to the top of the Alex Johnson and taking a walk.


I live just 2 blocks from that hotel....


http://www.alexjohnson.com/


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Mook [04 Feb 2003|03:54am]
I'm a mook.

And I am hitchhiking on the road that goes from Springfield to Yellow Springs, and I've been walking with my thumb out for hours.


I hope I don't die on this road.


I hope some great girl in a convertible picks me up; and at the same time I hope that some evildoer comes by and picks me up so that he can add me to his collection of carcasses in his basement.


wow.


I really hate this thumb of mine, and what the shit am I doing in OHIO?


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My little octopus [01 Feb 2003|03:50am]
I'm here to preserve this poem I wrote when I was 13 or something:

I love my little octopus


My octopus loves me.


I love my little octopus


under the cottonwood tree.


My little octopus goes


DEE DEE DEE DEE DONG DONG DONG DONG DONG!!!


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