[ info on | me! ]

*Sigh* [12 Nov 2003|06:10am]
[ mood | stressed ]
[ music | Rolling Stones - She's So Cold ]

I woke up at 5 AM this morning. I couldn't go back to sleep. So I thought maybe I'd take a nice shower. I did. My dad got pissed. Supposedly I ruined his whole schedule, his whole fucking morning, perhaps his whole day, etc. So now I'm not allowed to get up at 5 AM any more.
Now I'm depressed. And I want to die. Or at least get somehow physically hurt.
Would you be happier if I was never born, daddy? Jeez, sorry for ruining your whole fucking life. Yeah, fuck you, hah. It's all your fault.
He always makes me feel this way. Never makes me happy. Then when he sees I'm not happy he asks me why I'm never happy. I can't give him a straight answer because then he'll hurt me even more.
Maybe I really should have never been born.

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Happy Halloween! [31 Oct 2003|09:37pm]
[ mood | hyper ]

Rawr. Dude. My costume keeks arse, man. I love it. I don't wanna take it off. I'm a guinea! I got my striped slacks, suspenders, white blouse, black vest, and black boots. I slicked my hair back and put hairspray in it to hold. My nana got me a newsboy's cap (don't know how to explain what they are, but oh well. No fedora.) My dad said I looked like "a real guinzo" -- no offense to any Italians out there. And I got my little brother's eyeblack, right. And I very very lightly made light black circles under and around my eyes and on my eyelids... then I got my other little brother's plastic gun. And that was my costume! And I don't want to take off my costume. But I'm going to have to. Oh well. But I love it all. I think I'm going to live in the hat. Happy Halloween, everyone!

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Dude.. [30 Oct 2003|04:33pm]
[ mood | gloomy ]
[ music | U2 - Red Hill Mining Town ]

So much stuff has happened.
Yesterday my half brother died. R.I.P. Vinny, 1983 - 2003. :(
I got a Doors shirt. c| | (\\)(//)| |``s! (Can't make the S, lol)
Uhh... well... maybe not 'so much stuff' has happened... but that's okay. It's all a big deal to me.
Oh yeah. Word of advice. If a guy friend that you have a huge-ass crush on ever gets a girlfriend, and it hurts you so much, just write down your feelings. You'll feel at least a little better.
Tomorrow is Halloween! Or, as I would proudly chirp, "Hallee-ween!" Yaaaaay. I get to dress up as a mafia-dude. Er. Well. Kinda. I kinda need a fedora. Which I don't have. But what the fuck. I'll get one somehow.
That's it for now.

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