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[03 Jul 2008|04:48am] |
Dear Todd,
you're my "father" if you can even call yourself that.
Most of the time, you disgust me. You treat me, mom and Tyla terribly.
But you treat me the worst. You still act like I'm 8 years old.
News flash! I'm 18. You have no right reading my mail.
No right calling the phone company to read my text messages,
No right going through the things in my room and reading my personal journals.
I have my own life.
I'm a good kid, and i deserve so much better than you not trusting me,
especially when I've never given you a reason not to.
You like to control me, I know this.
You try to control who I'm friends with, and who I talk to
& when I don't take your "advice" you threaten me.
YOU ALWAYS THREATEN ME
...and I've never ever been good enough for you.
I've tried my hardest, but it's getting old.
I can't do it anymore.
You don't respect me, so how do you expect me to respect you???
and p.s. I love the smack you talk on me behind my back to mom and Tyla
trying to get them to hate me, just like you.
Not going to happen.
& p.s.s.I hate how your doing everything in your power to make sure
that I will never talk//see this person again. ITS MY LIFE
I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING!!!
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[02 Jul 2008|03:29pm] |
it's weird - it's my birthday and we broke up about an hour ago.
i'm happy.
because i've finally realised that i am in love with you,
and in september we can work this out and try again.
i'm gutted, but at the same time i'm happy.
it's weird and i'm not sure how i'm supposed to feel right now.
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| new brunswick |
[01 Jul 2008|10:47am] |
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mood |
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upset |
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music |
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don't matter - akon |
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I'm going to New Brunswick today, I'm going to be leaving in a few hours to go to the airport. I'm going for a karate tournament that I'm really not interested in going to, I'm really only doing it for my dad. I'm going to try and have a good time though, I just don't want to compete or be at the tournament all day long because it won't be fun at all. I have a couple books, a word-find, and my ipod to keep me busy this trip. Hopefully I'll be able to find another word-find at the airport and hopefully the new cosmo magazine. I woke up with Mark by my side this morning and I really didn't want to go ! We showered, and had breakfast, and waited outside for his ride to go to work. He's so sweet. No wonder I'm so scared to loose him. We had major issues going on yesterday and it was driving me insane because I was all 'great..we're going to end like this right before I leave'. Then he was thinking about leaving his friends because of me and my issues and I was like 'no. i'll leave before you ever do that.' just because I know exactly how that feels like. I will never let someone leave their friends. I left my friends time ago and havn't been able to keep a group of friends since because I know I'll just have to leave them. So, I sucked it up, I'm growing up, and whatever. I'm used to changing me, it's how I grow, so I don't mind it. I can deal with tears and pain but I won't see someone else go through it, especially Mark. So, things are good again, and hopefully will continue to be good. I just hope this trip goes by fast and Sunday comes super quick so I can come back home already. Anyways, wish me good luck...I'll need it, trust me.
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| the key to change is to let go of fear. |
[01 Jul 2008|10:42am] |
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mood |
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sad |
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music |
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i kissed a girl |
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It turns out,
sometimes you have to do the wrong thing.
Sometimes you have to make a big mistake
to figure out how to make things right.
Mistakes are painful,
but they're the only way to find out
who you really are.
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| hedly |
[01 Jul 2008|07:26am] |
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mood |
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miss you |
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music |
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never too late |
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Hoping I can run today and get away faster than ever from here another night and who can say if leaving is better than living in fear?
Here's to all the broken hearts tonight. Here's to all the "fall-a-parts" tonight. Here's to every girl and boy who lost their joy, they let it get away.
You know it's never too late! Get up and start all over again! You know it's never too late! There's got to be a better way. Don't settle for the cold and rain, it's not too late to start again. Find a way to smile and never let it get away.
It's been too long and we've been down and out without laughter. No smiling just tears. We're tired of falling down and being such a disaster, we've been here for years.
Here's to all the broken hearts tonight. Here's to all the "fall-a-parts" tonight. Here's to every girl and boy who lost their joy, they let it get away.
You know it's never too late! Get up and start all over again! You know it's never too late! There's got to be a better way. Don't settle for the cold and rain, it's not too late to start again. Find a way to smile and never let it get away.
I'm gone, I'm gone, there's got to be a better way, I'm gone.
You know it's never too late, there's got to be a better way.
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[01 Jul 2008|01:44am] |
this was a year ago.
It's still true, baby, I just need you to believe it to.
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[29 Jun 2008|02:35pm] |
When i had a bad dream.. i watch them to make me feel better.. =P
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[29 Jun 2008|02:27pm] |
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I don't think i can fall in love..
I feel like we're all individuals in this world.. you were born alone, so you will die alone two! why live your life with someone else you think you are in love with.. There is so much more then just fall in love and have a happy ever after... there is this world to find out, friends to have fun with, parties to go to and a carreer to shape. that's life for me,, i don't think i need someone else with me to live this life
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[28 Jun 2008|10:18pm] |
I really dont care what you've done in the past
All I care is where you're going and who you're with.
And if that person can be me...?
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[25 Jun 2008|07:08pm] |
I didn't make this. I found it on photobucket.
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[23 Jun 2008|10:38am] |
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[21 Jun 2008|10:24am] |
This is the ONLY thing in life I'm looking forward to.
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