Lauren's Blurty
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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Lauren's Blurty:

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    Friday, June 4th, 2004
    5:07 pm
    My Date
    Note: This entry was written on May 31st at 10: 32 pm.

    Oh man. Where to begin? I have never considered myself to be a big fan of blind dates or being set-up in general but I must say I have most definitely changed my mind. No doubt about that. So I have been talking to this guy for about two weeks and now I am so “crushing” on him. Absurdly my first impression of him was how uncannily he reminded me of Keith. Looks, clothes, mannerisms, etc. It was really fucking strange. I had this weird feeling in the pit of my stomach that I wasn’t sure what to make of. I was highly attracted to Keith so naturally I did feel an innate penchant for John. But then again I kept thinking that this wasn’t a good thing cause Keith turned out to be a douche in the end. Fucker. They are disturbingly alike. Case and point: John shows up in kinda baggy jeans and a grungy sweatshirt with a “The Firm” hat. Totally Keith’s style. And then his music is another thing. He likes the same genre of rock. I don’t really know how to label it but his cd collection was stuff like The Who, The Clash, Rancid, Rage Against The Machine and Pennywise. This is very creepy too. (The Twilight Zone music please). He used to work at a flower shop as did Keith. Oh and not to mention he is from a suburb of Detroit- like Keith. How coincidental is that? This has me really thinking. So I will go ahead and say it now: I really like him. He already wants me to come down there and visit. Big sigh. I hate goodbyes but he promised to come back soon. I just wonder how soon. So right now I am elated. That is the only word that I can think to describe it. After dinner and a movie we went back to my house and hung out for a bit. We wanted to escape the parental eagle eyes so we went for a walk. He led the way and somehow we ended up at Rocket Park. I used to play there as a kid. Here’s the censored version: we “talked” a lot. Oh man it was time well spent. It was almost like a scene from a movie- frolicking in the rain and such. I totally enjoyed every second of it. Then reality hit and he had to take off. Parting is such sweet sorrow. It has been so long since I have felt this way about someone so it’s freaking me out in a way. This is something real- not just horny attraction with shallow intentions. I have a feeling that something substantial could come out of this. But then again who knows. Distance is definitely a challenge. We’ll see what happens. I will definitely keep you guys updated. Oh before I forget- THANK YOU AUDRA!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Current Mood: elated
    Current Music: Dave Matthews "Everyday"
    Wednesday, April 28th, 2004
    3:46 pm
    I am done with Math for the rest if my life!!!
    Hoorayl I just finished my Stats final. That means if I pass that I will never hafta touch math for the rest of my life!! Isn't it great being a Comm major? So here's the recap of my finals: 4 down, 1 left!!! BIG SIGH OF RELIEF.

    So Monday I couldn't update. You have no idea how much that bothered me!! Updating is one of the simple yet pleasureable moments of my day. So you can imagine how much I was irked by Blurty being down. I will have to make up for it and write a kewl entry. But what to write?

    Yesterday I discovered Megan and Jenny's (Slutty) LJs. Now I have more to comment on. Hehe. I love it. One of these days I will join the LJ cult. Until then Blurty will hafta do.

    So I filled out an app for TJ MAXX. Yes this is my current job ambition. They're hiring for sure so I should have a chance. Fingers crossed. Otherwise I might be sitting on my butt for a few weeks.

    I am planing my week already. Yeah, that's not like me at all is it? Hehe. Here's what's on the agenda:
    - get pics developed
    - sign up for gym membership
    - call Cathy and Kim
    - cook stuff
    - read
    - go to bank
    - get eyebrows waxed
    So that's my to-do list. For some reason I have the urge to make some good home cooked food. Oh wait, could it be cause I have been eating cafeteria shit for the past eight months? Hmm...that could have something to do with it? Mmm..I can already taste the chocolate chip cookies. Yummy!!!

    It's starting to dawn on me- I won't see my friends for four long months. I was trying to think back to January and it seems so long ago that I can't fathom waiting that long again. Sighs. I hope that my friends back home can help me get my mind off it all. The guys never fail to cheer me up. But I can definately forsee some post-UD depression in the future. We'll see how it goes...

    I definately have the job next year. It's at the Galley Cafe in the KU games room. We had a meeting Sunday and I met some of my potential co-workers. They all seemed like a bunch of kewl kids. The only prob is that we get started at a measely $5.25. That is definately a downgrade from this year. But hey it's a job!

    I just found out my cousin was deathly ill last nite. She went to the ER in Columbus. The worst part is that her bf is being a total ass. He's trying to pick fights with her but she's too sick to fight. And he accused her of being selfish!! I am worried about her. At least Kazi is there to take care of her.

    Kristen said something the other day that is definately quote-worthy. We were talking about roommate problems and she compared getting a random roommate like a sick psych experiment. Think about it. They put you in a tiny room with a complete stranger and see how long it takes before someone snaps. Sick huh? No wonder people have problems. It's such an absurd concept.

    Lindsey made a list of memorable UD memories. I feel like I should do the same but there are too many to list! I'm sure yet year will top this year though!! We all decided that we're investing in a quote board. God knows how many hilarious things I say...especially drunk!! Should be interesting.

    Friday is my last nite here. Kristen and I are gonna go hit up Brown St. for the last time. Tears. The parents are coming in the morning. Kristen is flying out Saturday. Who knows when I'll see her next!!? Odd. I see her almost every day. It will be an adjustment for sure.

    I also found something last nite when I was putting off homework. Check it out:

    NAME ANALYSIS FOR: Lauren Patricia Caggiano


    You are fair-minded sometimes to the point of being opinionated. You have a strong need to be loved and appreciated. You have much enthusiasm with a driving attitude toward achievement in life. You are soft-hearted with a charitable nature. You enjoy a challenge. You can take thought-directed actions. You can be quite inventive and quite curious. You can handle details well. You have a methodical mind.

    You don't fair well under inharmonious conditions. You are very peace loving. You can get very upset when you are frustrated. You have a need to be up front. Your privacy is important to you. You have a rich inner life. You have a lack of confidence in your mental abilities and do not like being forced into giving your opinion. You are relatively demonstrative in your affections. You enjoy being stroked verbally and physically. You are clever, inventive, imaginative and youthful. You enjoy socializing. You need to learn to give and receive love for love's sake. You have a need to be assured of affection. You have a need to be up front.

    You are clever, inventive, imaginative and youthful. You enjoy socializing. You have a need to be up front. You are a hard worker when you make up your mind to do a job. You need to learn proper evaluation of labor and work. You can be either a compulsive worker or a professional loafer. You need to learn to give and receive love for love's sake. You have a need to be assured of affection. You have a need to be up front. You must learn to give 'wise' service and not be a martyr. You have a great deal of loyalty to those you love. You have much inner strength.

    Interesting, huh??

    I sold some of my books back to the bookstore today. They gave me $32.50. That's enuf to cover my credit card bill debt and maybe a dinner at Panera. I have more to sell back. Maybe that will gimme some spending money!! Being jobless is not fun!

    Current Mood: relieved
    Current Music: Lauren's UD Party Mix CD
    Friday, April 23rd, 2004
    11:59 am
    Btw...the subject line has no relevance...I just am obsessed with this word. It means "a fortunate coincidence". I like the sound of it. It is the word of the day for me. I am coming to believe in serendpity...some things just happen without any explantion, but are lucky. They are the nice lil surprises in life.

    I think I am going to something tonite that I rarely do on a weekend nite: stay in!! I am just not in the mood to go out. It has been a long week and I am drained. Staying in a doing something low key might do me some good.

    I need to fix the settings on my journal cause you can't post comments anymore. I really miss reading the comments...especially yours Sam!

    One week left and counting til I am outta here. That's right 6 more nights. It's hard to believe. Well I won't miss sharing a room...that's for sure!!!

    Can I just say that I love Death Cab!! I am not sure if you can call my music taste "Indie" yet. but I am slowly getting absorbed into it. Oh yeah listen to this: OAR came to campus like there years ago to play for Homecoming. How kewl is that? They played "It was a crazy game..." Man why wasn't I in in college yet!??! Damn it. I think it was when when they more underground.

    Did I mention that Carina is going to Italy next month! Yeah the girl who hasn't been on a plane is going on an eight hour flight! Crazy. I am super happy for her. She will love it and grow from the experience so much. I have no doubt that she will have a great time. I just hope we can hang out when she gets back!

    Still no hope for a job yet. I think I am gonna call Ayres, Sears, and Pennys to see if they're hiring. Working in a dept store might be a decent job. As of right now I am just desperate for a job! I can not give up. I might hafta apply at a restuarant but that is my last resort.

    This entry is gonna be short. Honestly not much is new. I just have lost all motivation to do school work. I will hafta suck it up and put forth my best effort. It's not gonna be easy!

    Current Mood: blank
    Current Music: LimeWire mix
    Wednesday, April 21st, 2004
    3:02 pm
    Rain rain...go away!!!
    Yucky. That is the only word that describe today's weather. I swear we are cursed with bad weather. The Miami Valley is so unpredictable.

    Here is my horoscope of the day: You'll have a good deal to be proud of, but you'll want to avoid being boastful -- especially during evening, when others arewatching you..

    So Audra has me worried. She might move to NYC and I am seriously concerned that I will be lonely without her this summer. We have gotten so close this year since I have been away. I think she'll end up staying least I hope so.

    Man I hafta vent now. I can't handle my roomie anymore. She is so selfish and two-faced. Get this: she falsely accused me of stealing her stuff the other nite. First of all, she has no proof that I have ever touched anything of hers. Then she has the nerve to make up shit that I have "supposedely stolen". WTF? I am seriosuly tired of her bullshit. Good thing it will be over in a little over a week!!

    I called the places I applied today. Bad news: none of them are interested in hiring me. I am getting really down about this. My fear is that I won't have a job for a few weeks. But here's the good news: I got the job with Flyer Enterprises next year. Yay!!

    I am looking at my cd collection thinking how boring it is. I haven't bought a cd in months. I really am itching to buy a new one. Not sure which one. I just know I need some new music. Music is the soundtrack to my life. It's funny how I can apply many memories here to songs I have heard at the moment. I think many people can relate to me here.

    I just realized my birthday is in exactly 2 months. That's right I wil be the big 2-0. Scary huh? It seriously does scare me. I won't be a teen anymore, yet I won't be quite an adult. I think 20 will be hard cause ur almost 21 but can't do all the stuff yet.

    I looked at my friend's away and it says he's getting coffee. Man that sounds soo good right now. A big cup of chai all to myself. Damn it I wish I had 3 bucks. My account is drained right now. I hope no expenses come up.

    I have read some past entries from way back in '03. It's funny how my style has changed. I write longer and more in depth entries no doubt.

    I know this is really shallow, but I have been thinking about my hair for the summer. Should I grow it out and keep the bangs. Or should I get a cute, short (not too short) cut? I know I need to get it cut as soon as I get back cause it's getting unruly. I wish it would just do what I want it to! Such is life I guess!!

    I am listening to Death Cab right now on the mix. I am def gonna get their cd. I am getting into the "indie" rock as Sam calls it. I love their sound. It's very mellowing. I must compliment Sam's taste in music!

    Current Mood: gloomy
    Current Music: Sam's mix
    Monday, April 19th, 2004
    3:27 pm
    le 19 avril
    Horoscope: Concentrate on those issues that are most pressing. An intellectual approach may not be the most suitable; trust instincts, common sense..

    I am going crazy!! I am blocked from signing on with my screen name LaLaC14561. It's a long story but my account expired so the bastards won't lemme sign on. So I have lost all the 150 ppl on my buddy list! It's sad but I can not function without AOL!! So to you all you reading this, note that I have a new screen name: Tiltygirl84. I don't have everyone on my buddy list, so if I haven't im'd youm just IM me. It frusterates me cause now I have to create a new profile, away messages, etc. Grr.....

    Have you ever wondered what your name means? I kinda knew before but I wanted to know more so I searched online. Here's what I found:

    Gender: Female
    Meaning: Crowned with Laurel
    Origin: French
    User Rating:
    5=LOVE IT
    1=HATE IT 3.4

    I have been thinking about what I miss about leaving in Stuart next year. Here are ten things I will miss(not in any particular order):

    10. Rudy's on the Hill
    9. 2 am fire alarms
    8. the bench in front of Rudy's
    7. the hill
    6. the view
    5. the tightknit atmosphere
    4. 4 whore Adele
    3. the laundry room
    2. Meyer basement
    1. midnight sledding

    It's so weird to think that I only have 4 days left of regular classes. I have lost most of my motivation and motivation. I need to stay focused. but how? Maybe I need to get some ginko baloba? Seriosuly I need some caffeine pills.

    Here's a survey Missy sent me:

    1. What time do you get up? 6:45
    2. If you could eat lunch with one person, who would it be? Madonna
    3. Gold or silver? silver
    4.What was the last film you saw at the theater? Home on the Range
    5. What is/are your favorite TV show(s)? tv...what's that?
    6. What did you have for breakfast? nothing
    7. Who would you hate to be stuck in a room with? my roommate...oh whoops?!
    8. What inspires you? good music
    9. What is your middle name? Patricia
    10. Beach, City or Country? city
    11. Favorite ice cream? Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough
    12. Butter, plain or salted popcorn? Butter
    13. Favorite color? black
    14. What kind of car do you drive? Mercury Villager
    15. Favorite sandwich? chicken pesto
    16. What characteristic do you despise? fakeness
    17. Favorite flower? carnation
    18. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation where would it be? Rome
    19. What color is your bathroom? uh green and beige
    20. Favorite brand of clothing? Old Navy
    21. Where would you like to retire to? Paris
    22. Favorite day of the week? Thursday
    23. What did you do for your last birthday? Spent it in France
    24. Where were you born? Coldwater, OH
    25. Favorite sport to watch? volleyball
    26. Who do you least expect to send this back to you? uh maybe Kaitlin
    27. Person you expect to send it back first? Sam
    28. What fabric detergent do you use? some cheap stuff
    29. Coke or Pepsi? Coke
    30. . Are you a morning person or a night owl? night doubt
    31. What is your shoe size? 7.5-8
    32. Do you have any pets? Tiger...R.I.P.

    So I have an obession with reading away messages. I thought Matt's was pretty amusing today. Check it out:
    The only reason women like Orlando Bloom so much is because they secretly think he is gay. It's true.

    My dad asked about my weekend and I told him about my lil drinking experience. He found it rather amusing. He was like "so you're not gonna do that again, right?" Never again? I think not. Hey it was fun while it lasted...until I puked!! At least he wasn't uptight about it. Speaking of partying this weekend, check these pics out. I am obsessed with the one of me and Missy sticking our tongues out. In fact it is my desktop wallpaper!

    Current Mood: productive
    Current Music: Counting Crows
    Friday, April 16th, 2004
    11:18 am
    Hey Mr. DJ.....
    So I popped in a cd that I haven't listened to in while- Madonna. Madonna always seem to fit my mood. I would say she's one of my favorite artists, despite what people say about her.

    Horoscope: You're going to have to supply yourself with the kinds of things you need to get the job done. You can't count on others to provide them..

    Good news: first of all it's Friday! Also I just realized how soon school will be over. See, I am ambilvalent about this. My friend sent me this reflection that hit my feeling right on the nose. Seriously I could have written it- that's how much I can relate to it. Check it out:

    The weather is supposed to be superb this weekend. I think the hill is calling my name. I can already feel the sun shining on my face...lying on the grassy hill. It's so nice to lay there and space out without a care in the world.

    I'm slowing regaining energy anf feeling back to my old self again. For some reason when I get sick, I get depressed. Nothing seemed to make feel like myself. Kevin even couldn't cheer me up! If I take some allergy meds I'll be fine. Besides, it's a Friday. I could never give up giving out!

    Tomorrow is our Phi Beta Chi 9 Hole. I am not sure what to expect. Hard liquor doesn't do that much to me, but 9 in a few hours might!!

    Did I mention how much I enjoy this weather? I put on a skirt that hasn't seen the light of day since October. It's a bit tight, but smaller than when I tried it on a few weeks ago. I think I might have shed some pounds this week cause I lost my appetite. I love wearing cute clothes in the Ghetto.

    x. Slept in your bed: Kristen
    x. Saw you cry: Kristen
    x. Made you cry: Nikki
    x. Spent the night with: Kristen
    x. You shared a drink with: Kristen
    x. You went to the movies with: Kristen and Collette
    x. You went to the mall with: Kristen
    x. Yelled at you: Mom
    x. Sent you an email: Meme
    x. You kissed: Keith

    x. Said "I Love You" and meant it: To family and friends
    x. Gotten in a fight with your pet: can't say I have
    x. Been to New York: Sighs..if only..maybe this summer!
    x. Florida: Yes, spring break in fact.
    x. California: nada
    x. Hawaii: Nope.
    x. Mexico: nope
    x. China: no...and have no desire
    x Last noise you heard: My roomie brushing her teeth
    x. Last time you went out of the state: Indiana or to Ohio...depends on what u call home?
    x. Things you like in a girl/guy: Sincerity
    x. Do you have a crush on someone: Teehee...maybe
    x. What book are you reading now: Awareness
    x. Worst feeling in the world: Betrayal
    x. What is the first thing you think when you wake up: Did I wake up on time?
    x. How many rings before you answer: a few
    x. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: nope
    x. If you could have any job you wanted, what would it be: Editor of Rolling Stone
    x. Are you a lefty, righty or ambidextrous: righty
    x. Do you type with your fingers on the right keys: sorta
    x. What's under your bed: losta stuff...I use it for storage
    x. Favorite sport to watch: Um..volleyball
    x. Current Age: 19.75
    x. Siblings: CoCo
    x. Location: Columbus Ohio
    x. College plans: Currently at UD...maybe grad school here
    x. Piercings: just in the ears
    x. Boyfriend/Girlfriend: free as a bird

    x. Do you do drugs: uh....not really
    x. Do you drink: every weekend
    x. Who is your best friend: Audra
    x. What kind of shampoo and conditioner do you use: Bath and Body Works
    x. What are you most scared of: getting fatter
    x. What clothes do you sleep in: my Lerner pj'sx.
    Who is the last person who called you: Mom
    x. Where do you want to get married: in a church
    x. Who do you really hate: no one really
    x. Favorite number: 21
    x. Been in Love: no...just lust
    x. What type automobile do you drive: 95 Mercury Villager
    x. Are you timely or always late: mostly on the nose
    x. Do you have a job: full-time student and lunch lady
    x. Do you like being around people: Certain people, but mostly yes.
    x. Best feeling in the world: Taking a shower
    x. Are you for world peace: of course
    x. Are you a health freak: when I get in a neurotic mood yes

    x. Have you ever loved someone you had no chance with: again....just lust here
    x. Have you ever cried over something someone of the opposite sex did: yes indeed
    x. Do you have a "type" of person you always go after: Always? not really
    x. Want someone you don't have right now: more or's complicated
    x. Are you lonely right now: sorta
    x. Ever afraid you'll never get married: sometimes
    x. Do you want to get married: yeah
    x. Do you want kids: Yes.

    x. Room in house: the porch
    x. Type(s) of music: alternative rock
    x. Band: Currently? O.A.R.
    x. Memory: spending my birthday in France
    x. Day of the week: Thursday
    x. Color: black
    x. Perfume or cologne: Clinique Happy Heart
    x. Month: June

    x. Cried: nope
    x. Bought something: nope
    x. Gotten sick: why yes
    x. Sang: yeah
    x. Said "I Love You": In my head, possibly. No.
    x. Wanted to tell someone you loved them: not really
    x. Met someone new: sorta
    x. Moved on: not really
    x. Talked to someone: duh
    x. Missed someone: To a degree
    x. Hugged someone: Yes...Kev!
    x. Kissed someone: nope
    x. Fought with your parents: Nope
    x. Dreamt about someone you can't be with: No
    x. Had a lot of sleep: Yeah, sort of.

    Current Mood: optimistic
    Current Music: Madonna
    Wednesday, April 14th, 2004
    3:25 pm
    A girl called LaLa
    My horoscope:You may begin the day with a stubborn concern over your health, but rest assured that what threatens you can pass quickly and painlessly..

    Hmm....I find this terribly ironic. It is true I work up feeling sorry for my pathetic self. I have something..not sure what it is but it has drained all my energy. I went to bed at 11:30 last nite....a record for me!

    I managed to get up on time to schedule. The scheduling gods were actually good to me. Check it out:

    11-11:50 Comm 201
    1-1:50 Soc 101
    2-2:50 History 102

    3-4:15 French
    4:30-7:45 Photo 101

    1-2:45 SCI 190
    3-4:15 French

    So I am a happy camper with this schedule. On top of this, I have a great shot at this job working at a cafe in the new games room. I had an interview yesterday that went suprisingly well. I am stoked. I am just waiting for her to call me back and tell me for sure.

    I guess today is Brad's funeral. My uncle Doug built his coffin. I think that's very kind of him. Sometimes when bad things happen people come together. I feel bad that I can't be there, but this week is pretty filled. Sam is going so she'll make me look bad!

    1)Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. Write down what it says: -- "Not because it was good, because it was new".
    2) Stretch your right arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first? -- the yearbook camera

    3) What is the last thing you watched on TV? -- some cheesy Flyer TV program

    4) What time is it WITHOUT LOOKING -- 3:34

    5) Now look at the clock, what is the actual time? -- 3:41

    6) With the exception of the computer, what can you hear? -- Sublime coming from the Meyer wing

    7) When did you last step outside? what were you doing? -- after class- coming back to Stuart
    8) Before you came to this survey, what did you look at? -- my e-mail

    9) What are you wearing: an AE shirt with AE jeans
    10) Did you dream last night? -- no but I can tell u I slept like a log

    11) When did you last laugh? -- when I saw this guy on campus who I saw last weekend dancing drunk at a party

    12) What is on the walls of the room you are in? French posters
    13) Seen anything weird lately? -- my friend's info on his profile
    14) Last movie you saw? -- Home on the Range....with Collette

    15) If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first? -- A digital camera
    16) Tell me something about you that I don't know: -- My parents didn't have a boy's name picked out so I was named Lauren by default

    17) If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do: -- Make people realize that they can change.
    18) Do you like to dance: -- Drunk- yes!

    19) George W. Bush: -- Get him out of office!

    20) Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her: Natalia

    21) [Same question for a boy] -- Anthony

    22) Would you ever consider living abroad? -- No doubt...and prolly soon!

    I put in some apps over Border's, Payless, Kohl's and Pier One. Still no word yet but I am giving it time.

    This weekend is supposed to be nice weather. I am so ready!! It will be the last weekend stress-free to enjoy. I am really gonna miss this place. In fact I am afraid I will endure a minor depression when I leave. Is that odd?

    I am wrapping up things with the yearbook. In fact I might be done by this weekend (wishful thinking). Isn't that crazy!! I am ready to be done with it though.

    Current Mood: sick
    Current Music: The music coming from Meyer outside
    Monday, April 12th, 2004
    7:09 pm
    Happy late Easter to everyone!!! Hope it was well-spent with friends and family and what not. I have a lot to fill you in about so I am gonna give details day by day. Here it goes:

    Thursday: Ethan took us home around noon so we got into town around 3. Kristen and I raided the fridge and devoured some real food. Yummy. Then we got settled in and stuff. I ran some errands, etc.. Later Mom took us to Kohl's and Payless to do some shopping. I got an early Easter gift of two pairs of shoes. Super cute. Audra came over and we went out to Blockbuster to get some movies. We picked out some comedy dvds. Of course we made a run for Wendy's as we often do. Then we went back to the house and watched one of the dvd. It was a good time..just hanging with Audra and Kristen. I am glad they get along.

    Friday: Friday was interesting. Kristen and I made appointments at Clinique to get our makeup done. We felt so hott after we got all decked out. Seriously we felt like a million bucks. Then I went to Lerner to find a dress for Easter. I got a good deal on it. Then we browsed the mall for a bit. Audra took off for Dayton and we said our goodbyes. Then I picked up some apps from places around the mall. I have my fingers crossed. Hopefully something will pan out. So then we went back home. Mom took us out to this Chinese buffet. Yummy!! Then Kristen and I went to the new movie theatre. Coldwater Crossing is a totally remodeled stadium seating theatre. It's gonna be a fun spot to hang out this summer. They gave out free popcorn and drinks as a promotion. You can't beat that!! After the movie we went over to Rob's. The guys and Christen were over there drinking and doing their usual crazy stuff. Doobie was so drunk that he consented to getting a major haircut. So Rob, Bob and Hanson went at his fro. They gave him a bald spot!! When he was sobered enuf to realize it he was pissed. It was funny but crossing the line a bit. My friends are crazy. They took pics and everything. After a few Smirnoff's it was time to go. Good thing I only live a few blocks away!

    Saturday: Kristen and I took it easy and just lounged around the house. It was nice to do much of anything. Ifilled out a few apps. We met our friends at Fridays' for dinner before the concert. That was an experience. Our waitress snorted!! So then we went to the concert. Whoah....I had the best time. The lead singer was some eye candy. They were better live than on the cd. I got so into the music that I fell into this trace-like state. The music is so mellow and liberating. They are my current obesession. I tend to go thru stages in music tastes and right now I am into them. There was a big group of cute blond shaggy haired guys surrounding us. I didn't mind that at all!! Stepping in a sticky puddle of beer wasn't the best though. Afterwards we went over to Rob's for a bit. Bob wanted to go get some ice cream so we went to Steak and Shake. He dominated the conversation but it was still nice to hang out. We went back to Rob's to say goodbyes. When I got back home chaos erupted. Audra went to visit Kevin in Dayton. She had some car probs so Kev had to follow her back. She was looking for a place for him to crash. I felt super bad cause we couldn't help him. Luckily a friend of Audra's let him stay there. It was quite an experience to say the least. So then we called it a nite.

    Sunday: Sunday I was awakened with some bad news: my cousin Brad died Saturday. We don't know the cause yet but it totally got me off guard. Our family always has something happening. So that kinda ruined my Easter. I felt down the whole day so it wasn't the happiest Easter. We didn't go to Celina because of all the mess. Mom made a nice brunch. Kristen and I took Collette to see the new Disney movie "Home on the Range". It was super cute. So then after that we were bored so I called Audra. She came over with another comedy dvd. Good times. She filled us in about her trip. Then we hit the sack cause we had to get up and pack.

    So now I am back at school catching up and stuff. I hope this week is productive. I am relieved because Friday is one day closer than normal. Well I better get some stuff done. Until next time!!!!

    Current Mood: nostalgic
    Current Music: O.A.R.
    Wednesday, April 7th, 2004
    10:53 am
    Is it break yet??
    I wrote a long entry but it didn't update somehow. Fuck technolgy!! Well at least I tried. I update again Monday when I come back from break. Take care everyone!!

    Current Mood: anxious
    Current Music: OAR
    Monday, April 5th, 2004
    8:55 pm
    I love you Brandon Boyd!!!
    Ok so I got some bad news today: Kevin can't come to the Fort anymore. It's a long story but basically Audra's paranoid that her mom will find out that he's staying there. Needless to say I was disappointed. He promised me that we'll still go camping though. I hope it happens. But there is some good news though: Meme sent me a check for Easter. Now I will have some spending money for break. So I must tell you about my weird experience Friday nite. We ended up going to this party on K Street and running into Geoff. Kristen ran into this guy from her town and they chatted it up. There were these other guys in the kitchen by the keg that I randomly started talking to. I have no idea how it started but for some reason they started cracking on us. I was too tipsy to care so it didn't bother me. Then they invited us out to their apartment. Kristen and I (with impaired judgement) left the party with them. So we followed them and they led us to this random house on College Park. They walked in like they lived there and turned on the music really loud, leaving us absurdly condused. Kristen and I were like "What the fuck?!!" Then we all went outside and this one guy started climbing this antenna thing to the roof. Yeah he was on the roof!!! Then the other guy handed him a case of Beast and he climbed with it. I was so perplexed but too tipsy to be scared. So I climbed up to the roof. Somehow they convinced us to come to their apartment. Kristen and I were too tripped out by them so we left and walked back to Stuart. That nite still has me confused. Don't ask me their names either. They had to be the shadiest kids we have met here.
    Saturday was busy. I got initiated. That's right I am brother now!! The party afterwards was a little lame. I left the party and went home to do some stuff. I was debating whether to go to Lowe's cause I heard some bad stuff about it. People were being crazy and getting fined. I figured I would rather go out at night to a smaller party and not risk anything. So we ended up at 112 Chambers. I saw Geoff yet again and he sucked me into a crazy game of beer pong. I am getting to be a champ!! I took Kristen, Laura and her friend Robert. It was a nice because I knew almost everyone at the party.
    I got some disapponting news Friday. I didn't get a position on the Flyer News. Big Sigh. I guess it's because I don't have enuf experience. I can still write as a staff writer though.
    My cd collection is so varied that I forget about some cds every now and then. I haven't listened to Incubus' Morning View in a long time so I decided it was time to break it out. I am so swooning over Brandon Boyd right now. I still have the mental image of him shirtless from the concert. He sure has some nice abs!!!
    I am going to see OAR this Saturday. I must admit I wasn't too familair with them before this week. A lot of UD kids seem to be into them. I downloaded a few songs and I really like the style. It should be an excellent concert. Well that's about all for now. I will update Wednesday!!

    Current Mood: motivated
    Current Music: Incubus
    Friday, April 2nd, 2004
    11:14 am
    I think I'm on a Dave streak..Yeah I have been craving his music this week. Not sure why but it hits the spot. Speaking of music..guess what? So Larz and I were talking online last nite and he asks me "What are you doing July 30th?' I was like he's crazy- I have no idea that far in advance! Anyways he asked me if I wanted to go see John Mayer. I was like "ohmygod..what I ever!!!" So it looks like we're going to Deer Creek to see him. Now I will get to see what Audra was talking about. I hope he's as good in concert as in person.

    Horoscope: A surprise is in store for you, and you must be sure to keep your eyes and ears open at all times. After dark, certain risks increase..

    I had the weirdest dream when I took my nap. I dreamt that I had a campus apartment with Katrina. I come into my bedroom and Audra showed up by suprise. I was surprised to see her but also at the fact that my room was totally rearranged. Katrina totally fucked up the whole stuff was all disheveled. Odd. I hope the part about Audra showing up by surprise happens. That is not far from reality though. That's totally something she would do.

    So I had a great time last nite. It was what I needed- to get away from my boring routine of homework. Flyer Radio sponsered a Battle of Bands concert at the Pub. I ran into Meghan's bf Geoff (Jeff) What a nite. He tried to hook me up with one of the guys in this band who I had my eye on. Yeah that was another story. That guy was crazy. He basically started stripping in the middel of KU!! Too bad the Pub has these nazi ladies who come around and look for under aged drinking. Geoff had like 5 beers and they were looking pretty damn good to me!! Laura and I went. She's such a kewl girl. Very low drama and easy to get along with. We both decided that we will make excellent roomies.

    I am anxiously awaiting Easter break. Here is a list of the stuff I need/want to do:
    1. Go to the mall
    2. Go see "Eternal Sunshine" again
    3. Homework
    4. Pick up some job apps
    5. Get lotsa sleep
    6. Go out to eat
    7. Spend time with Collette
    8. Catch up with friends
    9. Laundry
    10. Get pictures developed

    Well that's about it for now. I am gonna head off to lunch with Tiff.

    Current Mood: amused
    Current Music: DMB
    Wednesday, March 31st, 2004
    3:41 pm
    Survey time
    Audra might be coming down again Friday if I can convince my parents to let her borrow my car. Wouldn't that be fun? I really need her right now. It has been a hard week. I am not even going into it. Break will be a nice time to kick back again. Then we go back for just a few weeks!! Audra, Kevin and I are planning a camping trip when we get out of school. Won't that be fun? I am not much of a camper but it will be fun with them!!
    I have been having odd daydreams lately. Like in class today it was embarrassing cause I kept zoning out into a daze. I had the weirdest daydream in class. For the life of me I can not recall what it was about. I just am usre it was pretty trippy.
    F I R S T . T H I N G S . F I R S T.-
    [my name is]: Lauren
    [in the morning i am]: groggy/grumpy
    [all i need is]: happiness
    [love is]: complicated
    [i'm afraid of]: tight spaces
    [i dream about]: weird shit
    [number:] 21
    [subject:] Comm
    [clothing brand:] AE
    [shoe brand:] AE
    [sport to play:] volleyball
    [drink:] iced tea
    [animal:] Tiger (r.i.p.)
    [holiday:] Halloween
    [favorite line from a movie:] "How happy is the blameless Vestal's lot! / The world forgetting, by the world forgot. / Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind! / Each pray'r accepted and each wish resign'd." ~Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
    [favorite lyric from a song:] "You can't always get what you want.." ~The Stones
    [bands:] DMB, The Flaming Lips, Counting Crows
    [artists:] Warhol, Picasso
    [movies:] Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Moulin Rouge, Ferris Bueller
    [flowers:] sunflowers

    -H A V E .Y O U. E V E R . .-
    [pictured your crush naked?]: hehe....yeah
    [really seen your crush naked]: I hafta answer that?
    [had sex]: nope
    [been in love]: nah
    [cried when someone died]: yes
    [lied]: Yes

    -W H O-
    [makes you laugh the most?]: Kevin
    [makes you smile]: Audra
    [gives you a funny feeling when you see them]: Matt
    [do you hope has a crush on you?]: Nick
    [is the easiest to talk to]: Kevin

    -D O. Y O U. E V E R-
    [sit on the internet all day waiting for someone special to I.M. you?] hehe...maybe
    [save aol/aim conversations]:a few
    [wish you were a member of the opposite sex]: yah...during period time
    [cry because of someone saying something to you]: fact today

    -H A V E .Y O U .E V E R-
    [fallen for your best friend]: nah
    [been rejected]: all the time
    [rejected someone]: yeah
    [used someone]: Yes
    [been cheated on]: nope
    [done something you regret]: too often

    -W H O .W A S .T H E .L A S T. P E R S O N-
    [you talked to on the phone]: Audra
    [hugged]: Kevin
    [kissed]: no comment
    [slept with]: Kristen
    [instant messaged]: Kevin
    [cried to]: Kristen
    [laughed with]: Audra

    -D O .Y O U / / A R E .Y O U-
    [smoke cigarettes]: only when I am drunk
    [obsessive]:'s a definate flaw of mine
    [could you live without the computer?]: live but not
    [how many peeps are on your buddylist?]: 150+
    [what's your favorite food?]:baked ziti
    [whats your favorite fruit?]: strawberries
    [drink alcohol?]: every weekend
    [like watching sunrises or sunset]: Sunsets
    [what hurts the most?]: betrayal
    [trust others way too easily?]: at times

    -N U M B E R-
    [of times your heart has been broken]: several times
    [of hearts u have broken?]: 1
    [of people have slept with]: zilch
    [of continents i have lived in?]: one
    [of drugs taken illegally?]: uno
    [of tight friends?]: 3-5
    [of cd's that i own?]: 50 maybe
    [of scars on my body ?]: 4
    [of things in my past that i regret?]: trusting boys too much

    -P I C K . O N E.-
    [marry perfect friend or perfect lover:] perfect friend
    [cats or dogs:] Cats
    [one pillow or two :] one
    [with or without ice cubes: ] W/O
    [top or bottom :] bottom bunk
    [winter/spring/summer/fall:] Summer
    [night or day :] wee hours of the nite
    [gloves or mittens:] gloves
    [dressed or undressed:] dressed
    [bunk or waterbed:] bunk
    [mtv or vh1:] MTV
    [ocean or pool:] pool
    [showers or baths:] Shower
    [love or lust:] Lust
    [silver or gold:] Silver
    [diamonds or pearls:] I guess diamonds

    -I F.Y O U. C O U L D .-
    [move anywhere:] Paris
    [meet a celebrity living/dead:] John Lennon
    [live with one person the rest of your life:] no one comes to mind
    [name one thing you love:] self-esteem
    [name one thing that embarrasses you.] drunken comments
    [do you like school? ] the social aspect of it
    [do you like to talk on the telephone?] DESPISE IT.
    [do you like to dance? ] only drunken dancing
    [do you sing in the shower?] Sometimes
    [do you think cheerleading is a sport?] barely
    [what's on your ceiling?] polka dotted tiles
    [what's the hardest thing about growing up?] Wanting to grow up

    Horoscope: Stamina is an issue, and you must guard against wasting fuel of any kind as you proceed cautiously along your charted course..

    Current Mood: tired
    Current Music: Dave
    Monday, March 29th, 2004
    3:48 pm
    John Mayer rocks my world!!!
    WHOAH. So I have so much on my mind's insane. I have learned so much from this weekend-both good and bad experiences. Here a list of ten things I learned this weekend:

    1. My friends will be there to comfort me in hard times.
    2. I have good matchmaking skills.
    3. Be careful who you confide in.
    4. Don't drink too much!
    5. BW3's wings are yummy!!
    6. Kalingo is a kewl band.
    7. Always put your friends before a boy.
    8. Sleeping is not as fun as staying out late.
    9. Don't take drama too seriously.
    10. Kevin is such an awesome guy!

    Today's horoscope:

    The sooner you start on a new project, the sooner you'll realize that you know precisely what you're doing. You need that kind of confidence.

    I will be so glad when I get initiated Saturday!! I am tired of all this interviewing bullshit. It took so much of my time. Thank god it will be over soon.

    It's odd to think that I will be done with my section shortly. I will miss working on it. Yes, it did bring about a great deal of stress but I liked doing it. I won't know what to do with the new found time!!

    This is scary. Someone was stabbed like a block away from our dorm. I never thought that I would have to fear for my life here, but it seems like you need to watch out. Sad but true. Dayton isn't exactly the safest place to life but I guess I thought the campus was exempt from the frigthening realities of the real world. I guess I have been proven wrong.

    Current Mood: yucky
    Current Music: John Mayer "Heavier Things"
    Friday, March 26th, 2004
    10:36 am
    I'm just sipping on chamomile........
    I'm listening to my newest burned cd: No Doubt Greatest Hits. That band will always fascinate me. Gwen Stefani is such a interesting person. They have been around for around ten years now and their style has really evolved. I would have to say they rank in the top twenty of my fave bands.
    Not a whole lot is new. Today on the way from class I was reflecting on this school year and how I have changed. I feel like almost a different girl then when I first set foot on campus. Whether that's for the good or for the worse I suppose is debateable. One thing Audra has noticed about me is that I have become more assertive. I stick up for myself when before I wasn't as likely to speak up. I guess that's a good thing. Also, I have a really eclectic mix of friends here. In high school I really just had two groups of friends: the girls and the guys. Now here I have the guys like Kevin, Aaron, Brendon, etc. But I also have a ton of aquaintances. I think that next year will be interesting to see how I relate to these people. I have really grown apart from Nikki so I doubt we'll hang out. Then Nicole might be living in a single so I will see less of her. We'll see.
    My article was published yesterday. You should check it out. I would appreciate it!§ion=News&artnum=04
    I was talking with Katrina last nite about my friend Kaitlin. I find it somewhat odd that she hasn't called or written me in a long time. The last time I saw her was over Thanksgiving break. I am waiting for her to make the effort I guess. I am not sure how much we will have in common. Katrina said that that is not a reason to not be friends with her anymore. She has a good point.
    Here's my horoscope for today:
    You need to increase your own sense of security. It's already there -- but you must look for it in the right places..
    Isn't this perfect for me since I am always voicing my insecurities? I am glad to hear that I have the security- I just need to find it. Hmmm...I must agree.
    Did I tell you Kristen is coming home with me for Easter? Yep, she's spending the holiday with the Giesige family. I hope she gets to meet Sam. Speaking of..I need to drop her a line or something. She hasn't been online all week. I hope she's still doing with Casey. I am so fascinated by their relationship. I know it's odd but it's true.
    I need to get on the search for a summer job. I am thinking a clean job- no food!! Borders appeals to me. I could become more literate and meet some kewl people. I want a job that I will actually look forward to.
    Collete is growing up before my very eyes as cliche as it sounds. She's already reading and very precocious. Over break she lost her first tooth. She came in my room and showed me her grin with a tooth missing and the buck she got from the fairy. How cute!!
    I have a lot of work ahead of me today with the yearbook. I am trying to tie up loose ends and it's just not working. There are some many details to take care. It's maddening.
    Note to self: get pictures developed when I go home.
    Well that's about it for now. Check back on Monday for more!!

    Current Mood: satisfied
    Current Music: No Doubt Greatest Hits
    Wednesday, March 24th, 2004
    10:34 am
    Happy Hump Day everyone!!! I am developing an adddiction to these surveys. Blame it on Sam!!
    [1] Dying unloved
    [2] Needles
    [3] being in tight spaces

    [1] Doobie
    [2] Kevin Papp
    [3] Audra

    [1] good books
    [2] fulfillment
    [3] writing

    [1] lies
    [2] drama
    [3] being used

    [1] Statistics
    [2] War
    [3] love

    [1] magzines and books
    [2] cds
    [3] jar of pens

    [1] talking online
    [2] organizing
    [3] feeling hunger pains

    [1] Find true love
    [2] Visit Italy
    [3] Become a successful writer

    [1] Write
    [2] Listen
    [3] Worry

    [1] Organized
    [2] Creative
    [3] Latent
    [1] Ski
    [2] Diet
    [3] Like myself

    [1] Your heart
    [2] Your best friend
    [3] Anthony DeMello

    [1] Televison evangelists
    [3] Psychics
    [2] Metallica

    [1] "It's hard to explain"
    [2] Way kewl
    [3] Fuck!

    [1] anything Italian
    [2] Chocolate Chip cookie dough ice cream
    [3] strawberries

    [1] pilates
    [2] Italian
    [3] how to like myself

    [1] chai
    [2] iced tea
    [3] water

    [1] Clarissa Explains It All
    [2] Happy's Place
    [3] Sesame Street

    Ok so what's new in my life? Well the plans are final: Audra is coming!! Yay! Actually, Audra, Larz and Carina are coming!! Now it is time to decide what our plans are. Audra seems excited. I hope to show her a good time cause she's going through a rough time now. What else? I am almost done pledging. Our initation party is April 3rd. I have heard it's pretty crazy. Also, i wrote another article for Flyer News. I also have an interview for a possible position on staff. It would be great if I snagged the A&E editor position. That would rock my world.'s today's horoscope:You may feel as though you're in a rut -- and perhaps you are. The one person who can help you out of it, however, is you -- and you know this well
    Well that's it for now. I will try to be more creative next entry and actually write rather than post a survey!

    Current Mood: busy
    Current Music: whoops...I forgot!
    Monday, March 22nd, 2004
    10:38 am
    Back to the grind....
    So I am back from a week of r&r. Well it's good to be back but hard to get in the swing of things again. Anyways I enjoyed my break. I feel like there would be too much to tell in one entry so I will do a low brow form to summarize it: a top ten list!! Here it is, my top ten list of my vacation!!

    10. sleeping in past noon
    9. REAL food
    8. actually watching tv
    7. being "mello" with Kristen
    6. getting some color on my pale body
    5. the beach
    4. the mall
    3. no parents
    2. no homework
    1. Seeing my friends!

    So we were at Meme's from Saturday nite until Friday morning. Mom picked us up from the Dayton Airport and took us to Celine. We went to my cousin Claire's play. Yes that is a story in itself. Grandma twisted my arm bragging about the quality of this sixth grade play. I musr admit she was right- the set and the costumes were pretty impressive for a grade school. Then we went back to the Fort. The guys invited us to go bowling so Kristen met the whole gang. She prolly has a pretty warped perception of my friends after meeting them!! Classic Indiana pastime: bowling. The higlight of the nite was the underaged drinking. Yes Kevin could pass for thirty so they don't even card him. So he bought a few and they became the communal drink.Nothing like bowling tipsy. Cough cough...Kristen! Then Saturday we hung out with Aud and went to the Rave to see the best film ever: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. I am obsessed to say the least. It was damn BEAUTIFUL. I has been so long since a flim has touched me that much. It was truly an artistic masterpiece...very artsy and indie. Of course my mind wandered and I instasntly applied Matt to it. In fact it is probably the eptimone of Matt's film taste if I could say so. Maybe that's why I cried. I discussed it with Keith and he thought it was the best film he has seen in a while. Speaking of Keith he got a new haircut and glasses. Oh how I want date him...or at least hook up with him! I know it's bad because it would never work. I just wish that he would have a change of heart and it would all fall into place. Then again maybe I am looking for love in the wrong place. Who knows?
    So Kristen met the family. She saw my family it its raw form: dysfunction. Of course we're already fighting about this summer. I want to have a car for next year and work about thirty hours. They want me to get a job first before I make plans. Understandableble but it still frustrates me. Here are my big summer savings:
    - trip to NYC too see Kristen
    - digital camera
    - savings for next year

    It's weird to think that we only have really four weeks left of school. I feel like I have changed so much since August. In fact I know this to be true. Someday I am going to go back and read my early entries from this year. Should be interesting to see how my style has changed too.

    So my friends are planning a trip this weeked. I am not going to hold my breath. I'm not being cynical just realistic cause something always comes up. I want to see show them a good time...probably just some party time in the Ghetto.

    I have thinking about some cds I want to buy as soon as I get some spending dough:
    The White Stripes (the one with Seven Nation Army)
    Death Cab for Cutie (the new one)
    Lenny Kravitz's Greatest Hits
    The Flaming Lips (Yoshmi Battles the Pink Robot)
    Maroon 5 (maybe)

    These are very random titles I know...but my music taste right now is so random. I think I am going to burn some cds and saw save some moolah.

    I am officially on my diet-fitness routine today. That means I am watching what I eat and going to the gym 3 times a week. I am tired of being fat!! It's so frusterating to go shopping with skinny gurls like Kristen. It's not her fault but going with her makes me depressed. I will never do that to myself again! I am going to stick to stores that don't make me want to lash out on all the skinny gurls. Actually Lerner is growing on me. Well I best move on to what I should be doing- writing my article for the paper. Look for it in Thursday's edition. Peace out!

    Current Mood: determined
    Current Music: Lauren's Mix
    Saturday, March 13th, 2004
    12:14 am
    Sunny Florida here I come!!
    Ok so I am so fucking antsy- I can hardly contain myself! It's so bad...I don't know how I brought myself to get all packed. But I did it!! So I am ready to leave!!! Anyways here is today's horoscope:
    You won't be able to forget someone from your own past, as he or she will be apparent to you again and again at the most unlikely moments..
    I rearranged my room today. I moved my desk over closer to the wall. It creates a new the whole feng shui thing. Laura and I went to the mall today. Of course there was a prob with the bus so we ended up getting a ride with her folks. Anyways I got some cute stuff at Old Navy. I spent $70 and got some good deals.
    My darling cousin sent me another survey:

    [x] they call me: Al...haha
    [x] sex: Chica
    [x] my first breath of air: Was followed by loud screaming prolly
    [x] status: unattached
    [x] occupation: Student...that's it
    [x] best friends: Kristin, Laura, Carina and Audra

    [x] most memorable memory: my first day at UD
    [x] worst?: getting into a car accident
    [x] first words uttered:
    [x] first best friend ever!?: Torrie
    [x] love is: rare in true form
    [x] first love: Tony
    [x] love or lust?: lust is more fun
    [x] best love song: "Your song"
    [x] when love hurts: when it's unrequitted
    [x] true or false: all you need is love: true
    [x] is there such thing as love @ first sight? yeah
    ______Opposite Sex_______
    [x] turn ons: shaggy hair, good cologne, eyes
    [x] do your parent's opinion on your bf/gf matter to you?: only if it prohibits me from seeing him
    [x] what kinda hair style?: straight and sleek
    [x] the sweetest thing a member of the opposite/same sex can do for you?: Be honest and not fuck me over...
    [x] where do you go to meet new people?: here- parties
    [x] are you the type of person to HOLLER and ask for numbers?: nah....maybe approach them and ask
    _______Picky Picky_______
    [x] dog or cat: gatos
    [x] short or long hair: on me? short
    [x] sunshine or rain: sunshine by day...soft rain by nite
    [x] moon or sun: sun
    [x] hugs or kisses: kisses...passionate
    [x] 1 best friend or 10 acquaintances: 10 acquaintances
    [x] summer or winter: perpetual summer
    [x] written letters or e-mails: e-mails
    [x] playstation or nintendo: neither...i was sheltered as a child
    [x] car or motorcycle: skateboard
    [x] house party or club: small house parties
    [x] sing or dance: sing...kareoke..hehe
    [x] freak or slow dance: watching both

    [x] how are you today?: antsy
    [x] what pants are you wearing right now?: my olive Old Navy cargos
    [x] what shirt are you wearing right now?: my usual flowered Old Navy shirt
    [x] what does your hair look like at the moment?: straight yet disheveled
    [x] what song are u listening to right now? Red House Painters
    [x] how is the weather right now?: bitterly cold..yuck
    [x] last person you talked to on the phone?: Kristin...with shitty reception
    [x] last dream you can remember?: A really perplexing one with Matt in it revealing deep shit to me online about our past
    at.[x] who are you talking to right now?: Carina and Nikki
    [x] what time is it?: 12:31

    _______More About YOU!_______
    [x] what are the last four digits of your phone number?: 6218
    [x] if u were a crayon, what color would you be?: cyan...cause I never could pronounce it..haha
    [x] have you ever almost died?: not that I recall
    [x] what's the next CD you are going to buy?: The Flaming Lips
    [x] what's the best advice ever given to you?: "It's your life"
    [x] have u ever won any special award?: Yeah, a few in high school
    [x] what's the stupidest thing u have ever done?: went down a one-way street the wrong way
    [x] how many kids do you want to have?: uh..maybe 2
    [x] shampoo?: Yeah, especially when it's salon stuff
    [x] what are you most scared of?: getting fatter
    [x] how many TV's do you have in your house?: uh....3
    [x] have you ever broken/sprained/fractured a bone?: yeah my pinky in third grade playing medic
    [x] who do you dream about?: sex
    [x] who do you tell your dreams to?: no one
    [x] who's the loudest friend you have?: Kristin
    [x] who's the quietest friend?: Rachel
    [x] Is cheerleading a sport?: yeah
    [x] how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?: sounds like a porno title!!

    First name: Lauren
    Age: 19.75
    Birthday: 06.21.84
    Height: 5'6"
    Hair color: medium brown
    Eye color: hazel
    Glasses: just fake ones for style
    Contacts: Nada
    Braces: of them since 7th grade
    Hair short or long: short
    Where you were born: Coldwater, Ohio
    Where you now live: Dayton, OH
    Ethnicity: white as hell
    Bad habits: over-eating
    Piercing: just in my ears
    Tattoos: nope...never

    School / High School / ETC.
    Are you still in school: In college...frosh or "first year"..haha
    Favorite grade: 7th hands down
    Worst grades: uh..prolly 3rd...I was chunky
    Favorite teacher: Mrs. Parson
    Worst teachers: further comments
    Favorite subjects: anything Journalism related
    Worst subject: Stats...grr
    Buy or bring lunch: brought
    School sports: volleyball
    High schools: BDHS
    School activities: Lots to list. Yearbook. Newspaper. Circle K. Habitat.
    Popular and What?'s over-rated
    Favorite memories: any Dayton Ghetto ones

    Number: 21
    Clothing brand: Old Navy....I am obsessed I guess
    Sayings: "douche" "no doubt" "indeed"
    TV shows: very little...but when it's rare MTV
    Sports: volleyball
    Vegetable: corn on the cob
    Fruit: strawberries
    Movies: Moulin Rouge
    Actresses: uh....Nicole Kidman
    Actor: Johnny Depp.
    Candy: Carmello bars
    Gum: Extra
    Scents: Clinique Happy and Tommy Girl
    Band: Currently? The Flaming Lips
    Singer: Norah Jones
    Music: lately indie
    Fast song: "Hey ya"
    Slow song: too hard to say
    Things in your room: posters, cd's, dust.
    Places to be: Starbuck's, Second Time Around, Fazoli's
    Radio stations: don't have one
    TV channel: MTV
    Junk food: ice cream
    Fast-food place: Fazoli's
    Restaurant: Casa's
    Shape: circle
    Country: France
    State: New York
    Girls' names: Natalia
    Boys' names: Anthony
    Car: VW Beetle
    Music video: Madonna's "Ray of Light"
    Swear word: fuck

    Boyfriend/girlfriend: nope
    Crush: a few..
    Are you in love with anyone right now: Nope
    Have you ever been in love: maybe
    Ever had sex: nice try
    How many hearts have you broken: maybe know who u are!
    How many people broke your heart: One
    So what's your boyfriend like: grrr...
    Do you go more by looks or personality: looks attract...personality draws me in
    Ever kiss a friend: Yeah
    Are you still friends: Yes
    Do you smoke: nope.
    How about weed: uh.....
    Acid: No sir.
    How about a little ecstasy: No no no sir.
    Crack, heroin, anything else: No.

    You ate: Girl Scout cookies
    You drank: H2o
    The last place you went: Dayton Mall
    Last thing you bought: chai
    Last person you saw: Linds
    Last person you talked to: Linds
    Last song you heard: "All Mixed Up"
    Last movie watched: Ferris Bueller

    Current Mood: antsy
    Current Music: Sam's Mix
    Wednesday, March 10th, 2004
    10:08 am
    Lit Fest 2004
    I realized that I forgot to tell you about all the Litfest events I went to!! The concert was pretty kewl Friday cause we knew the band. Then Sunday was the best. There was a performance of excepts from "The Vagina Monlogues". I can't tell you how awesome it was. It gave me a new perspective on feminism and what it means to be a woman. I admire all the women who got up there and did the monologues. They addressed some pretty tough issues such as violence against women and periods. I could totally relate to some of the things they said. Kristin and I enjoyed it. I walked out of there feeling a new sense of "girl power". Then last nite was even kewler. As part of Litfest, the school brought in a famous internationally known feminist poet Marge Piercy. Her hayday was in the 60's when the femisnist movment was about to take off. I went to it alone not really knowing what to expect. She is women in her late sixties early seventies but still has her stuff together. She got up there and read some of her poetry. Her work is clearly liberal and I agreed with a lot of what she had to say. I felt like I was almost enchanted by her words and I walked out of there feeling refreshed. Listening to her I went into this deep state of almost meditation. She has really inspired me to start writing my own poetry. It is mostly free verse but yet it is more than just words. It is clear that she is strong feminist and anti-Bush person. In fact this offended Kevin who is pretty conservative. He seems to think that she was full of "feminist bullshit". I'm not saying he has to agree with her liberal ideals but he should respect the feminism movement. IT IS NOT BULLSHIT!! I think men often times feel threatened when women take a stand. God forbid they actually speal out against the social injustices of society!! Nonetheless I am glad he was stirred by her words, regardless if it pissed him off. Poetry is meant to stir emotion. Personally I was moved in a postive way. Oh well some people will never see the light. Liberal is the only way to be!!
    Well enuf of that... spring break is only 3 days away!! Friday we're going to the mall to get some clothes. It doesn't like it's going to be a total break from school though. I might have to do an outline for English. I also got a Flyer News article that I should start on.
    I am trying to make the most of next year already. I am putting in my apps for Flyer News and the Daytonian. I am aiming high and shooting for chief staff writer in Arts and Entertaiment. For the yearbook I am not sure what position I want. I don't think I want to do Residential again. I am considering doing Senior Ads.
    Here is my horoscope: Now is the time for you to invest a little more enthusiasm into your endeavors. When someone says jump, you should want to say "How high?".
    Lately I have been having some weird dreams. I think I had one with Matt in it. I dreamt that we were talking online and he explained his behavior.Very odd...
    By the way....I put "sore" as my emotion cause my feet hurt. Every Wednesday I have to dress up for my fraternity so I usually wear these shoes. They are the worst...cute yet painful. I am going to have some high chiropractice bills soon if I hafta keep wearing these. Grr...
    So I am going to look for a job when I come home next weekend. I am considering Borders or Panera. I think it would be kewl to work in a bookstore. I like the type of people who shop there...the artsy crowd. Hmm...potential opportinity to meet a boy?
    I talked to my cousin Sam yesterday. She is doing well. She had an art review yesterday. I'm sure she blew them away. I am proud of her. Also she's in a "serious" relationship. I am happy for her. But I resent it slightly that she didn't tell me until I asked. Why do people keep these things from me? Maybe they just want to keep things low key. But still it seems like a big deal to me so I would tell everyone. Oh well..
    Well I hafta take care of some things before I run off. Until Friday!!

    Current Mood: sore
    Current Music: Lauren's UD Party Mix CD
    Monday, March 8th, 2004
    3:34 pm
    I've got the blues...
    Ok so I will be blunt..I am depressed today. Here's why. I just feel so unattractive and uncomfortable in my skin. My favorite jeans that fit perfectly now have a hole in them. Of all places... in the ass.. so it's too obvious to get away with. Now I am down to three pairs of pants that fit...yeah three that's right. I am too fat for my other pants. It's horrible. I feel like I am screaming to get out of this body. I have to do something and quick or I am going to be unhappy forever. This is how bad it is...I almost cried in class for no apparant reason. I just felt so frusterated and I couldn't keep it in any longer. And it didn't help that Matt totally ignored me today at breakfast. It was me Kevin, Al and Nikki sitting at the table and Matt was absurdly akward towards me. He made eye contact with everyone else at the table but me. Odd. How can anyone have such poor social skills? Well he even said it himself so why am I surprised? I set my expectations way too high for him and that's why I was disappointed. Big Sigh.
    Here is my horoscope du jour:
    The sooner you start on a new project, the sooner you'll realize that you know precisely what you're doing. You need that kind of confidence..
    Well Aud's in Florida now. Wish I could be there now soaking up all those rays! Well it's only 5 days away!! This week is going to be rough though. I will hafta work super hard. By Friday I will be in much need of a vacation.
    I guess my midterm came.....I am relieved cause it wasn't as bad as I expected. Here is an overview:
    English: A-
    Religion: B+
    French: C
    Stats: D
    Pysch: B
    Comm: A
    My GPA was a 2.83 but I only see this as just a progress report. My grades are going to be very different. In fact they have already improved since midterm.
    I am making a checkist for Florida. Inevitably I always forget to pack something. I actually don't have much to pack cause I have very few clothes that actually look good from last summer/fall. I am going to hit up Old Navy Friday! And Payless is a must.
    So I mentioned the semi-formal before, right? Well we didn't end up going after all. Here's why: I couldn't find the dress I wanted to wear so I had nothing appropriate to wear. Also I wasn't feeling so hot after the nite before. (It was Ethan's 21st) So we decided to screw it. I stayed in and recooped and a got some good sleep for once. I don't know what is but lately I haven't been sleeping well. I have been getting 6 hours but I wake up feeling like I got 3. I almost fell asleep again in class.
    I still couldn't help but wonder what I missed at the party. I'm sure it just debauchery. I don't think compromising my health would be worth it. Besides, my liver will prolly thank me!! I am definately going to go next year...hopefully with a date!
    I'm getting my haircut when I am in town. I want to get something trendy done with it. Maybe a stacked bob? I just need to get in under control. Now I have like one good hair day a week if I am lucky.
    I burned a UD party cd Saturday. I put songs on it that remind me of parties I have been to in the Ghetto. I am seriosuly going to miss this place over the summer.More so the people than anything. Don't get me friends back home are great but I feel we have drifted apart. I know I will click with them again right away. I actually talk to my guy friends more on a regular basis. Maybe it is my aversion to the phone that is the problem.
    Speaking of friends back home....GOOD NEWS!! Carina is finally coming!! She's coming the 26th. I can't wait. Finally she can meet all my friends here and party with us. I'm not sure what she has in mind. Maybe she can take me off campus!!
    So I pity all that read this. Do I bitch too much? I just need to vent and this is my medium. It is my catharsis. Also feel free to post comments. It makes my day!!

    Current Mood: depressed
    Current Music: John Mayer
    Friday, March 5th, 2004
    9:07 pm
    So it's Friday and I'm ready to go out!! Kristin, Laura, Laura and me all went to this Phish cover concert. I know the kids in the band so it was kewl. We walked out of the concert feeling really mellow..the equivalent of smoking two joints. It was great cause I got really relaxed. In fact I am still feeling that way. So now we're going to Ethan's b-day party- the BIG 21!! I hope there's hairy buff! I'm going out with the future roomies for next year. We get along's wonderful!! GIRL'S NITE OUT!!
    So I must tell you about yesterday's dilemma. So that article I wrote for Flyer News...well it got fucked up before it went to press. The editor put someone else's name on the byline. So pretty much I didn't get credit for the story.It was an honest mistake but I was still upset about it. Check it out on entitled "Students Rise.." I thought it was my best one yet...the editor even agreed. So that's the deal. Let's see what else is new? It's getting really warm here. People are lounging in Humanities Plaza again. It's spring! I just can not help but to be sad to see all these girls in their cute clothes. I can't fit into my clothes from last fall. It's pathetic. I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING!! My dad and I had a convo about it and he gave me some good advice. He said sometimes the pain is worth the sacrifice. Like when your pants are too tight. It's no excuse to buy a bigger size. Otherwise you'll keep getting fatter. So I am going to make a serious diet/exercise change. I can't be so unhappy with my body for life. You're only young once so I want to make the most of it. be skinny and cute again! Well I am going to take a short nap before we go out. Toodles!!

    Current Mood: relaxed
    Current Music: Lauren's Mix
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