Knives

2:16am: back yo'
well, Im back........

alot of stuff has been going down......

example, 2 girls one Joe, they both prettymuch even out, one is not really better then the outher one...
they have great attributes...

crap, I've never had this before, I used to be so fucking lonely, now I just have no fucking clue as to what to do......



ps,

happy birthday dad, we all miss you, and we hope your watching over us in heaven....

12:50am: ^_^
ouch...
well Im all sore from a night of partying.....and no you sick fags, not from all the butt sex eiter....
Bottle of Vodka, and a 12-pack of bud....good times.....^_^

well, D got out of control, and most everyone got mad at her.... They had to drag her the hell out of my place...
I even told her, that I would knock her the fuck out, if she didn't leave....scary part is...I might have.....
Thats how pissed off I got.....
If it gets to that point....stay the hell away...cuz, Im really pissed, and I will do something I might regret....

meh...

rest of the night was pretty good, kinda a boys night,... Aidan, Sling, Drew and myself.....
It apears Aidan has a suger daddy...maybe...

ewwww, sling waved his thing at me......blah...

I have a job now....Jc pennys.....blah......
more cigerette burns to hide.....love life....confuseing.......food at home none....there has been no food here for about 3 days...
I hate being poor......
Marys Manga is coming along nicely.....drawing buildings for backgrounds right now....nice...


~Ja ne

2:31am: ;_;
This damn lonelieness is getting to me... I mean more then usual.....blah.....

Why the fuck does she keep calling??? Shes like fucking coke, ya know, ya shouldn't....but..... its right there!

I don't wanna do it................blah..

8:57pm: ^_^.................fuck you..........^_^
you think I can't live without you........
you think that I need you.... I don't need you...

I think I can.... I think I can.... ^_^


blah...

nothing really new to report...

wanna drink... this weekend....

Party, my house, do yourself a favor and be there


drinking, pot.... its gonna kick ass...

I think can I think I can.....

well.............

Just so you know.... I really don't like you....... The shit you did to me... it hurt.... you fucking hateful bitch.....
How could you say those things to me?...... I took so much shit just for being with you, and now, you turn around and treat me like shit.....


the following shit, goes to no one really. Its just kinda like all girls....and shit that they put me through

6:27am: drrakkt

reakkt drybjt



really drunk, haha, very fun, but bored outh of my mnined!


someone cme play with me

6:23am: im boted!

6:18am: im drunk!!

really whao!, w\

intren'te accseesss rocks...
bored
!!!!!!!!!!

someone come play with me!!!

balh, rubibng alckalhlol

4:18am: Im craving drugs.......any drugs.........I just don't want to face reality anymore.....

drugs I want most, from the ones I crave most, to least....

smokes
Tripple C
BOOZE
X
weed
coke
whip its

7:12am: I Knew it!!!!!
ok this might make me look like a huge nerd, but listen, cuz it shows that I was right in a scince debate....


I was watching nova, or some other crappy show, anyway. it was about the earths mgnetic field......why is this important???


well......
junior year.....
I wrote an extra credit paper of psyics..... the topic, earths declining magnetic field.........
you see earth magnetic field over the passed 300 years has been declining, thur evidence of magnatites in ancant potery, (if you want to now why that is, just ask me, Im too tired to ttype it all out right now)

however during the past 50 years, its has be declineiing at an alaerming rate, over 10% senes 50years ago..
you see about every 200,000 years or so, the earth mf flips, (ya know how a compass points north? well a few hundred tohsand years ago, it pointed south)

ahhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!! fuck it, my tryping is all shitty , Im reallly sleepy and blah!!!!!!!
I'll do thsi later................

fuckfukcufkucfkcfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfukcfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckufkcfukcfukcufkcufckfuckufckfuckfuckfuckfuckfukcfukcfuckufkcfukcfukfukcfukcufkcufkcufkukcufkuckukcukfcfuckfukcfcukfckufcukfcukkufccfkucfukcfkucfkucfukcfukfcukfcukfcukcfukcfukcfukcfukcfkucfukcfukcfukfcukfukfukfukfckucfufufcufkcufkcukcffukfukfufucfukcukcfukfukfuucfkuckfkcufkcufuckfukufkufkufkucfkcufkukfukcfukfukfukcufk

11:28pm:
pop-korn!!!

I love thee

12:55am: well today kinda sucked ass.

nothing much happend.....

meh.....

2:03am:

Meet Whiskers my adopted Sea-Monkey!

2:07am: well today was pretty fun, Vicki and Kyle + friends came over...

I've been feeling really sad lately....

If I can get enough cash I might be able to move out and go live with Vicki and Kyle, that would be soo kick ass.

I don't really know yet.

today when vicki left........ I felt sad.....it was really weird..... I like almost cried....

later me Aidan, Kyle and lisa went to dennys... fun was had by all.

I don't know whats going on with me.....

more in the insanity journal......were I can be free....or at least I think so.....

4:12am: well today was pretty cool, I slept all day........from 8am to 330am......very nice

yesterday was pretty boreing until Vicki came over...yay!


we just hung out all day until about 6am when she had to go home, she kicks ass and all that good stuff.
I even showed her my insanity journal......she was most kind...



laters.

5:19am: oh fuck...

oct 17th passed, and it just hit me....

I was thinking about what was going on at that time last year.......

It was a really good day....with a really special girl.......

sometimes memories kick ass.

9:18pm: This is gonna be one shitty Halloween......

plans of changed.....

I am now... gonna be at home....sleeping, or watching tv..... very fun.....

the past few days, have been really boreing.....like mind numbing boredem..........

i Hate this life...and everyone in it....

other...j...will.... fin...

5:04am: Little sidewalk surfer girl
Show me how to shoot the curls
I've been watching you
And all the things you do
You got me in a whirl
Sidewalk surfin' girl

Little sidewalk surfer girl
Now you're going 'round the world
Girl, you sure look sweet
Surfin' down the street
You got me in a whirl
Sidewalk surfin' girl

So grab your little board
And take it for a ride
No matter if you fall
I'll be by your side

[1st verse]





Protector


The ULTIMATE personality test
brought to you by Quizilla




You're too tired to be bothered with smiling,but
you're too nice to be really mean when people
are annoying you.You look tired,but you at
least try to seem happy.


What Kind of Smile are You?
brought to you by Quizilla



Well I've seen Black Flag and I've seen the Germs
And I've jammed with G. G. too
Even opened up for the Ramones
But it just ain't any use
She don't care that I know Ben Weasel and Metal Mike
It's all suck frightful tripe to her

Tamara is a punk, so you better not knock her
Tamara is a punk, she's a real punk rocker
Tamara is a punk and I wish she was my girl

I've been in Rolling Stone
Not to bitch and moan
But she's simple not impressed
I'm not as punk as fuck to her
But I'm friends with MTX
She don't care that I know Ben Weasel and Metal Mike
It's all suck frightful trip, to her

[Chorus]

She's the coolest of the cool
She's the toughest of the tough
She's the grooviest punk rock girl
She's the queen of the scene in the neighborhood
And she's got my heart in a whirl
And we'll never kiss in the Elvis Room
'Cause she doesn't like me like that
Not her and me - she's too cool for that scene

[Chorus]

5:54am: well no, I don't beileve I have ever sucked dick, you fuck head
well not much to say really.....

got my tooth pulled, it really hurts... I haven't eaten anything in what seems like a mounth... but its only been like a week... its hurts damn it!


I met L new girlfriend.... no one tells me anything... I didn't know until mary told me..

I myself am becoming more and more lonely..... it really sucks.....
need a girl.......sigh

next week is going to kick ass, gonna get real doped up and party..... fuck yeah..

still need to buy my custome.....

12:55am: 0100100011100100100100100010001010010001001001
ok......
well I have come to a point where I can't really function anymore.....

I would like to think that my "insanity" was brought on by pain and illness.... But that was just a catalist...

it was there the whole time... Its just that....I don't know....
no one understands.... I don't think Im crazy.....but then again.....sane people don't do the things I do.. or feel the things I feel... the me that people know is just a small part of me.
I tend to scare myself...... then I shake it off....
but its different this time... I don't feel the same.. Not like before.... I know its there but.....
Its not like showing as much......
I don't feel as......angry with myself like I do whenever it comes out....instead I feel fine.... Like its not me...
IM NOT THE SICK ONE.......THEY ARE....

I really am crazy you know? Not too many people know that.......

My family just ignors it.... thats best...if they tried something it would only lead in pain......and not mine....
a few friends know...... There was no other way to explain my behavior.......it was a have truth...
I didn't go very deep into my "problems".........just enough....

man im sick....I would I even write about this? I don't really have a need to.....

Im just bored right now.....
well....think what you like.....fear me....love me....trust me.... its all the same to me...

Im not going to say "DON'T FUCK WITH ME......." thats just wrong...... It happens... so what?
get over it... thats life...
One shity moment after another....just a series of shity moments....then sometimes.....sometimes....

Life doesan't seem so shitty after all.................then goes to shit again.... thats the way it is I guess.

2:14am: Kill Bill = One kick ass movie, and a kick ass night.
We all went to go see kill bill today, it was fucking awsome.
I can't wait till vol. 2 comes out.

Me, Aidan, L, Mary, Ryan, and Nicole went, I road* in the trunk, it hurted. meh.

Afterwords we went to dennys, it wasn't as fun as most other times, then again we were all tired.
I did marys drive way today, my $100 is now $35, sigh. oh well.

As am writing this Im thinking, "this is one lame ass update"

so I will stop now.

I think Nicole is really cute, I really liked it when she was playing with my hair, *sigh*

Im really fucked up.

12:53am: yawn
blurty sucks, I just never feel like updating.......

Sunday= sex........maybe.


I am gonna take mary to get her first tattoo, silly girl.
L and Kitty are going also.

yay! I won't feel so left out anymore.

Blah, Now I won't be the unique one that has a tattoo anymore..... *sigh*

bittersweet.



"I dream of Angels, but I live with Demons"

5:03am: test




just testing a new web hoster

4:43am: .-. __
/ \ / '.
\ \ | /
__\_ \ /
.' \ \ / sSS2z
\ \ \ sS/ .(
'.__ \ \s2z _/ _
\_ '. \s -\______//~~~~~~~~~~~******
.' '-._'._\ ____.---'| ~~~~~~~~~~~ ******
'._,__.--| _/
.', /
( ( \
/ \ \
/ / \. )
/ .' / /
_/ / /.'
( '/ (_~-.
/ / '-'
;/


Fuck, this took 4ever.

shit, Its not what its suposed to look like.

1:55am: 8723986-08279789707820610885
Wow, I am really trying to update this, journal.
Its weird, The only one a try to update on a daily baseis is the one On live journal, well that one and the one on my message board.
I've got like 8. Ah fuck it. I don't really care.

I've been thinking about girls......alot.
I mean Not like in a sex way, but like in a romantic way.
Its really really weird.

Tara, Anna, Kim, Julie, Karin*, all girls that were good friends, then we went out, broke up, and Now I don't talk to them anymore.
FUCK.
I look at my currant female Friends.......One day I consider asking one of them out, then the feeling is gone, Then it comes back. At one point or another I have had Feelings for ALL of my Female Friends. I don't want to.
It never works out. Its hard to make new friends, I like the ones I have.
Fuck!
I wish it would just go away....fuck!
I hate this, I hate this need to be close to someone, Fuck yeah Im lonely.
I almost always feel alone, I try to distance myself from all my friends.......
FUCK, Forget it...
theres no point to this....

2:14am: .............fuck bunnies..........
I have a small case of the sniffles.....eeeek...Im gonna die.
anyway Today was pretty boring, until me Aidan, Luaren, and Mary went to steak and shake good times with good friends.

Oh. Renee called today, shes so cute, she looks really young and has the cutest little lisp. awww soooo cute!
Anyway......
meh...
more later...